Thread: 2015: Year of the Breath, meditation, WBTB, confidence and dedication

Wow, I think I've found my major struggle with LD'ing in the first picture

I've been working on incorporating Sageous's advice from his excellent recent thread, "Memory: the forgotten fundamental". For the 2nd time in a LD I affirmed that my waking body is asleep in bed out there in the waking world, and that this entire dream experience is a fantasy taking place in my mind. It resulted in a visual-quality save (things got suddenly blurry, an I "realized" I was wearing glasses which were causing this, took them off and visuals were fine again), and indeed in a super-vivid bright ultra-HD experience following. I succumbed to caveman mode after that but still I think that the experience was longer and higher quality than it would have otherwise have been without this realization.

I've had epics two nights in a row now, with last night being perhaps my new favorite dreaming night of all time. Fights, weird beautiful fish, lots of girls, semi-lucid flying a jet plane over a breathtaking vista, wow...

stop-presses-what-night-not-lucid-who-cares-semi-least-fight-flight-sex-64314/

Interesting that I've shifted my focus recently to micro-WBTBs. The strategy seems to be working so far. I try not to get up at all, suppressing the need to pee if need be, and totally relax while thinking about my intent that the night is for dreaming.

I also took a cue from Ctharlhie, and try falling asleep while meditating/visualizing a white ball of energy in my throat area (from dream yoga). Trying basically for a WILD at each waking, I think this may be generating amazing dreams!

Micro-WBTBs may be the key for me, I seem to be able to avoid insomnia. I only performed mental recall during the night and was able to remember a fairly good number of earlier / mid night dreams. Some details of the beginning of some dreams were lost, however.

It was also very cold in the room during the night so my sleep was interrupted/uncomfortable at times. I got up only once to turn back on the heater and push the window most of the way closed.

I am looooving micro-WBTBs. More sleep time & more dream time. I don't seem to see a lucidity boost from get-out-of-bed WBTBs, just get more tired & frustrated. Maybe I'm just getting better at relaxing my body and mind in getting back to sleep[*]. A short lucid late this morning, as I seemed to recognize in-dream that I was missing opportunities to get lucid (haha!). Very waking-like situations in late morning, almost nothing odd to grab on to (except for the gale-force winds blowing in from the department store's front door….doh!).

I'm maintaining excitement and generally a positive attitude (nothing like multiple great dreaming nights in a row to help out with that), dreaming/recall is at times extremely vivid most nights. Boldness in dreams on an uptick, I need to use that as a catch. Strong location awareness in my childhood neighborhood, and seeing childhood home from a distance, recognizing it.
[*] It's almost like magic -- every single time I really "let go" completely physically and mentally, with perhaps a bit of concentration on a dream yoga visualization (symbol in the throat), I seem to fall back asleep and into dreams, even in late morning.

and yet another back to sleep success and more dreaming after a late morning waking from wife's alarm and son S2's noisy heading off to University. Late to bed (tsk tsk!) though and in a not good mental state after making an ill-thought-out foray onto the non-dreaming portion of DV where rudeness and insults rule the day, meant non-ideal dreaming. Some nice sexy moments here and there and an aware struggle with access to memory in one case made it a decent night in the end.

I've also started talking to my SC, negotiating, cajoling, convincing, that "we need to work together on this lucid dreaming thing…it's good for us, it makes us happy, so come on, let's get lucid together in dreams!" (my precious!), I think it's helped somewhat.

Two nights ago I encountered "lucid pie" at the end of a vivid medium-epic.

Bold sexy moments continue, which is good.

In some some my back to sleep practice is formal meditation. While aiming for sleep is not part of formal meditation, it does involve constantly noticing and (re-re-re-)-releasing mental and physical tension and letting go of wandering thoughts and concerns. It really works wonders. I may even work up the boldness to try get-out-of-bed WBTB with the confidence that I can get back to sleep afterwards.

Confidence is interesting, and tricky. The best results clearly arise when you can establish a positive feedback cycle of good results -> higher confidence -> even better results -> even higher confidence, and round and round, until there is no question in your mind that your results will *always* be good. It becomes a part of you. Yes you must still expend the effort, but you do it just *knowing* you'll have great results.

I'm there with dream recall. I enter every night *knowing* that I will recall dreams, probably a lot of them, in vivid detail. It's just not a question in my mind any more, it just *is that way*. I can even remember dreams now across sleep cycles, woohoo! Even though recall peak experiences are not every night, I know that they will always return. And even on "off" nights I remember lots of short dreams. In most dreams I now feel like I'm living the experience.

Now, how to do that with lucidity? I tend to hot and cold streaks with lucidity. I several times got to the point where when dozing in late morning, I had a 'special feeling' that "if I just fall asleep again, I *will* have a lucid dream," (and has come true, several times), but I cannot invoke that feeling on demand, it just happens or it doesn't.

I've been contemplating a theory for a while: that my issue may be that I think that lucidity is "something that happens to me, or doesn't," (passive) as opposed to "something that I *do*" (active) -- that it's a choice I need to make in the dream: to recognize the dream state. It's like lucidity is something that is bestowed upon me from outside, as opposed to being actively generated from inside.

Perhaps self-hypnosis/auto-suggestion can assist making this mindset transition. Any ideas/suggestions appreciated!

Originally Posted by FryingMan

Perhaps self-hypnosis/auto-suggestion can assist making this mindset transition. Any ideas/suggestions appreciated!

I've been using autosuggestion in two forms lately. I have two playlists on my iPad nano. One for recall and the other for lucidity. I also installed a subliminal message app on my PC and I have the same affirmations on it. Now the audio is not subliminal and I play it low so I can just hear it. I figure one reinforces the other. The PC app can be found at Mind Of A Winner and it's a free download. It's simple but functional and hasn't caused any issues on either my home PC or work laptop.

My recall is getting much, much better. I was averaging 2.5 a night for January and so far for February I'm approaching 4 a night. Even last night I went to bed dead tired because I was oncall for work this past week and I got called several nights for work problems. That combined with WBTB and DJing left me really dragging. I turned in at 8:45 and awoke naturally around 12:45 with only one dream recalled. I then slept through to 5:45 and thought I only had one small fragment of a dream, but when I started writing it down it filled in and I also had three more shorter dreams come to the front of my memory. I am pleasantly surprised. I was so tired I was expecting the night to be a blackout.

As for lucidity I'm not there yet, but this past week I had one dream where I had mounted a light on my neighbor's garage that only I could see and it flashed periodically. It was supposed to help with awareness while dreaming, but the neighbor was doing yard work and kept getting in my line of sight. Hah! That has to be a direct connection to the PC app, as not only does it flash very brief affirmations on the monitor but the task bar and system tray icon is a light bulb!

I also had two other dreams this week LD-related. One about almost WILDing during a prison break while we were laying down hiding from the guards and another about arranging sleep schedules on a camping trip to accommodate WBTB.

I can't be certain it's all due to autosuggestion because I'm doing lots of other work, but I'm thinking there's a connection. Just seems to have ramped up since I started with autosuggestion.

The other thing I'm thinking of trying is SSILD because self-hypnosis is supposed to be the basis behind that method. Plus if I'm up durting WBTB to DJ I might as well make use of the opportunity.

EDIT: For the audio and visual affirmations I use second person, not first person. I did some reading on autosuggestion and that is what's recommended.

I also agree with your statement about confidence, though at this point I can only relate it to recall...

Did a proper WBTB, first in a little while, attempted a WILD using an anchor of repetitive moment (walking dribbling a basketball, playing basketball at the park where my old junior high girlfriend MB used to watch me), and I dreamed about (crazy) basketball. The first dream (I think) after the WBTB I did get lucid but lost it/transitioned quickly. It took a massive oddness for me to grab lucidity (an owl was standing on my window, entered the room, and turned into a 4-foot tall thing that walked around the room).

full dj: 2015-02-23, (1.5 year anniversary) [LD #100 -- triple digits!] flying, pot, park, picnic, basketball - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

p.s. this was my 100th LD! Woohoo!

Originally Posted by FryingMan

p.s. this was my 100th LD! Woohoo!

Congratulations! That is great!
Next step: 4 digits.

Congratulations on LD #100, an impressive milestone! I rejoice for you!

Originally Posted by Urside

Congratulations! That is great!
Next step: 4 digits.

This will be this year's Christmas present I'm sure (haha, wouldn't that be sweet!).

Celebrating another back to sleep moment. Late this morning: found the discipline to finally focus on the breath, continually letting go of all trying/effort/tension and decided "well at least I'll have a nice little meditation session if I don't fall asleep," and once I finally made the decision to stick to it, and after returning from a few distracting trains of thought, I fell asleep pretty fast! I'm continually amazed how well that works. There must be a way to merge this ability into WILD practice: just somehow fall asleep slightly less quickly, with just the tinyest smidgen of awareness intact.

Originally Posted by FryingMan

There must be a way to merge this ability into WILD practice: just somehow fall asleep slightly less quickly, with just the tinyest smidgen of awareness intact.

I have to think there is a connection. When I'm deep in meditation I notice a couple of things. 1) I have a lot of hypnagogic imagery gong on but I usually don't pay it much attention because it's a distraction from breath. I treat it just like a thought or other distraction. 2) My body, especially my legs, arms and hands, feel very heavy and almost numb like they aren't there, and there's a subtle vibration or resonance going on.

I actually tried this laying down the other week, thinking it was the doorway into WILD, however I couldn't get the correct state of mind. Perhaps I just need to work on it? I'm use to meditating in an upright position.

By the way, congrats on your 100th LD!

Another bed-ejection FA: it is really nice to have such obvious cues!

I spent about 30 minutes before bed on a self-pep-talk, visualizations, dream sign review, etc. Including a talk with my SC about giving me really obvious cues (DCs telling me to do an RC, etc.) to get lucid…maybe the bed-ejection FA was my SC cooperating! My bed ejection FAs are when I "wake up in bed", then soon one end of my bed lifts high up, spilling me out onto (the ground, into a tunnel, etc.). It is not a subtle or confusing thing: I realize instantly that it's a dream event when it happens.

2015-02-25 (LD #101) epic adventure, friends & family, weird buildings, caught FA (bed eject) - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

Of course I went caveman immediately, bypassing all planned and rehearsed stabilization (DANGIT!), grabbed a girl and (amazingly enough) remembered to count to 5 first, but excitement was building so high so fast that I didn't make it past 3 before waking up….argh. It was very late morning so it may just have been an unavoidable waking moment.

I had an official sitting meditation session yesterday evening for 24 minutes. I got lost in thoughts/scenarios several times, probably almost into dreams it felt like, not waking concerns, but brought myself back. I made it through the 24 minutes without "fidgeting" or worrying about the time. About 15 seconds after my end-of-session alarm, my wife called me. Normally she calls in the middle of my sessions, so I laughed out loud at that fortuitous (for once!) timing.

In a slight shift in approach, I'm trying to always WILD now during the night when returning to sleep, trying to aim at least a little bit on the awareness side of sleep, if I make no progress after a while then I aim completely for sleep (this too happened).

how is it going frying man? i just started reading this thread today and really do enjoy reading all the updates you post. i noticed a definite change about halfway through all your posts. A much more confident set of posts! i look forward to your next update

Thanks for reading! I've been planning my February update. Dreaming in February was fantastic, but again not much in the way of lucids, just a couple. Meditation: just not getting it done D-/F. Confidence: C+, kind of wavering. WBTB: C, not noticing wakings much. Recall: A- some really great dreams but a slow period at the end.

Some rather dramatic family stuff (elderly family member basically in the midst of passing away) is going to be a hindrance for a while I suspect.

I'm wondering about breath awareness as the fundamental trigger, vs. body/legs/gravity awareness. It's hard to hold breath awareness for long. Maybe I just need to keep it up. I need more STOP/slow down moments/critical reflection. Haven't been getting out and about much recently, need to do that.

I've been more mindful during personal conversations, which is good because I talk a lot in dreams, much more even than waking life. And during conversations is when I tend to zone out the most.

I'm wavering back and forth between general mindfulness via breath vs. returning to targeted ADA/RC like legs/gravity. I'll guess I'll give breath the year but I need to really pick it up to give it a proper shot. I'm concerned that general mindfulness maybe too "diffuse", and that a saturated, singular, sense focus like legs/feet/gravity may be required in order to pierce the dullness/fog of the dream state. I'm not sure. Mindfulness is quite good for vividness/sense-of-presence of dreams, though.

Originally Posted by FryingMan

I'm wavering back and forth between general mindfulness via breath vs. returning to targeted ADA/RC like legs/gravity. I'll guess I'll give breath the year but I need to really pick it up to give it a proper shot. I'm concerned that general mindfulness maybe too "diffuse", and that a saturated, singular, sense focus like legs/feet/gravity may be required in order to pierce the dullness/fog of the dream state. I'm not sure. Mindfulness is quite good for vividness/sense-of-presence of dreams, though.

To me there's really no difference except a different object of attention. Of course one object might feel more natural to attend than another for a given individual. Maybe that's the trick? On the other hand the more difficult the attending, the more gain can be had. More of an exercising of awareness.

Even within mindfulness of breath there are different schools of thought. Some attend sensations of breath at the nostrils, or upper lip, or diaphragm or stomach. I tend to attend sensations of breath wherever I notice them. I'd probably be admonished by some for doing that, but it just feels right to me.

Originally Posted by JustASimpleGuy

Even within mindfulness of breath there are different schools of thought. Some attend sensations of breath at the nostrils, or upper lip, or diaphragm or stomach. I tend to attend sensations of breath wherever I notice them. I'd probably be admonished by some for doing that, but it just feels right to me.

I read about noticing sensations at the nostril opening but just can't seem to do it, there just isn't much or any sensation there for me. When a nun was showing us how to meditate she told us to follow the breath and as we got more relaxed to notice it going deeper down, so I don't think you'd be admonished for anything.

I too am starting meditation and breathing awareness techniques. It has been short so far so ill have to wait and see how it goes. Ill keep with it for a while unless it works great and ill continue

I managed to get myself to do another full 24-minute (well more like 31 since my cat got up and started wandering around the room and scratching at the door, so I got up and put her out and restarted, and re-started my 24-minute timer) session of following the breath. Just like the previous ones I've done I came out feeling great, and I wasn't constantly thinking "how much time is left?" like when I started last year.

Originally Posted by FryingMan

Just like the previous ones I've done I came out feeling great, and I wasn't constantly thinking "how much time is left?" like when I started last year.

I hear ya! I can physically and mentally/emotionally feel the afterglow for hours, and like you I no longer anticipate the end of the sitting. In fact I'm usually surprised when the timer goes off and if the sitting is particularly pleasing I sit through it for another 5, 10 or 15 minutes.

Today was a good day for following the breath and staying mindful. Certainly, I was aided in that I was in non-routine places and doing non-routine things today, but still I managed to maintain mindfulness with very frequent breath and foot/leg/step and location/strange object focus more or less continually for the entire afternoon into the evening.

Glad to hear from you again so soon. I tried meditating the other day and before i knew it, 20 minutes past in what felt like only 10. It is hard for me to make it to 10 without a thought coming into my mind still. in fact, every 2 breath cycles something slips in, though i try not to pay it attention. keep up with it and i will try too!