I'll probably sound completely crazy for saying this but I needed to share somewhere...
On Christmas Eve I told myself, with no prior thought or reason to really do so, that I was going to have a lucid dream right before going to bed, having never tried before. *Immediately after I did that I said "No I'm not..." and fell asleep. *Anyway, I didn't think about that again until I left to go back to school and I at some point remembered I had said that, and some things started to make sense. *Anyway, I spent some time meditating in this meadow next to the dorms (something I've never really practiced at all) and it a point where the whole world just started revolving around me... I got scared, not thinking about it possibly being a dream, and told whatever it was (my subconcious?) that I didn't want to be in control, and told it to take control. *Anyway, that incident scared me a lot and I ended up withdrawing from school and moving home, where things still get stranger... Without giving any specific examples it seems as if my senses are really all coming out of me rather than coming in through my eyes... for example, everything looked like it was in technicolor for awhile and I told myself time travel was possible for awhile and during that time I would have black and white flashes sometimes... Plus some of the things that happened at school sort of happened inversely here at home... Basically my point is it seems like I'm stuck in a parallel dimension where I feel like a ghost and just not knowing if I'm awake or asleep is confusing. *To add to it, last night one of my family cats was in my room and I could almost control how she acted by wishing for it... some times it seemed like she was teleporting or something... I sound completely crazy but while all of this is happening I'm still just living my life, it's just pretty scary any enough things have happened to make me doubt that the reality I'm in is real at all. *It seems like I was sucked into the movie It's A Wonderful Life or something a lot of the time. *Spirit of Christmas or something, I don't know... *A lot of the time it seems as if some game was set up for me and I forgot the rules.
A few strange things I can think of that were strange would be feeling breezes in my room while I concentrate on, cloud watching and seeing actual images similar related to my thoughts appear (like really appear), and while there are a lot of other things (stranger than I've mentioned but I'd rather not get into it) when my mom picked me up from school the night I meditated I said with full confidence that I thought this was all a lucid dream and she replied that she suspected as much... *The fact that my computer works fine boggled my mind for awhile after reading about electronics not working right, but I recall my computer's passwords and stuff not working right during the end of december and me having to sort of feel my way into making it work right again... I don't know...
Anyway, any comments would be nice... *Regardless this experience has made me incredibly interested in dreams.
Edit: It sort of seems like what happened is that if this
is a dream I some how gave up control of my dream to the dream and I've been working on regaining it. *Oh, and I fell in love two days before the dream and mentioned I would have a lucid dream "with you" when I went to bed... on my sister's bed. *And since then me and my younger sister have had incredibly strange connections that change depending on wether or not I'm comfortable with them, like having conversations in our heads with each other. *We even acknowledged it. *When I brought up that I thought this was a dream to her she mentioned that I just had to accept it as real... *I'm just sort of rambling at this point but another strange thing is that I've been able to look straight into the sun without my eyes hurting, look away... and have my vision just return to normal almost immediately and if anything my vision is better than I remember it being several months ago.[/b]
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