Timothy Paradox

So in dreams, our abilities are typically limited, and we are bound to follow the "plot" of the dream, blissfully unaware that we are dreaming. When one becomes lucid, one becomes truly conscious within the dream, can break free from the plot and decide for themselves what to do within the dream universe. Typically, the dreamer gains a whole set of abilities, only limited by one's imagination, and dream control.

I had a fairly active period in which I had quite a few LD's, most of them induced on purpose using practice. Then I stopped, but still had one or two LD's per year, naturally. Until last year... As of late, it's as if my subconscious has found a way to "sabotage" me. I have dreams these days, quite a few, in which I think I am lucid, feel I am lucid, but am not truly lucid. I gain a subconscious awareness of my reality (that I'm in a dream and I have god-like powers), but this awareness stays "beneath the surface" - like I'm not really aware of it.

Another way of putting is this: in lucids, you break free from the plot. The plot created by your subconscious, whose "job" it is to keep you unaware and following the story of the dream. So it's almost like my subconscious, in an attempt to stop me from breaking the plot, invented a genius way to stop me from doing so. It made the act of "breaking from the plot" a part of the plot! I literally dream about thinking that I'm dreaming. It gives me a bunch of cool powers I would normally have in real lucids, except they work far better because they do not *really* rely on dream control (like they do in lucids)...

That's just a theory of what this might be, though. Most of these "fake lucids" do wake me up when they end - just like all lucids do. I don't think I've ever *not* woken up right after a lucid ends (mine usually end when I lose control, typically when I'm having too much fun to bother about dream control). So that's a sign they could be lucids after all.

Still, in these "fake lucids" I never *truly* feel like I was free. I do in the dream itself, but after waking, it still feels like everything I did was "on rails", determined by another - not myself.

Again, fascinating.

Awesome sequence of dreams, very memorable. I had orders to assassinate a military officer (using a sniper rifle) at a military base. But I had trouble identifying him, and there were far too many other soldiers around to get a closer look. I think I temporarily gave up.

Another scene. I'm in a big city, at night, and it looks like it's the 1920's. It's raining. I'm in a parking lot (lots of old timers, that's how I know I was in the past), and I wanted to steal car to get out of there. My motivating for this criminal behavior is a mystery to me. The door opened, as door locks didn't exist yet in this dream version of 1920. The car alarm went off, and it was loud. A voice told me (or my own inner voice?) that I needed keys to start the car, so it was pointless to even try. But it was too late... between two buildings, I could see a man, a cop, approaching - investigating the alarm. I tried to casually walk away from the vehicle, but knew he'd seen me and was following me. He would arrest me soon, I thought. But then, something happened. I "felt" like I could fly. I could sense gravity "tugging" at me, almost begging me to take off - it's hard to describe. I realized it was the ultimate way to escape arrest. Here begins the "pseudo-lucid" part of the dream. I have all the abilities I'd have if I was lucid, and have some subconscious idea that I am in control and this isn't real, but at the same time not really... once again, very hard to describe. I still blindly follow the "plot" of the dream as if I wasn't lucid. I take off, and look back at the cop in mid-air. He stands there, looking at me, bummed out he couldn't arrest me. I give him the finger, and fly away. The flying, despite the rain and the darkness, felt exhilarating as hell. I looked down, or saw my shadow on a building, and saw I was wearing my long black trench coat. I was also wearing a black leather cowboy hat. I flew through the city, fast. So fast, I flew straight towards a building and knew I'd hit it if I didn't make evasive maneuvers pronto. But as usual, I knew such high speed maneuvers would be difficult, and I was too lazy. I decided to simply fly right through the building instead. I expected to violently burst through the windows and through the whole building, but instead I just kind of "no-clipped" through it, as if it was a fake video game object. This felt dissatisfying.

I flew into the next scene. Near the base from the beginning of the dream sequence was the Hollywood sign, which I flew past. It was sunset. I decided to finish my mission. Here things get violent. Continue reading at your own peril. I landed in the middle of the base, and smashed my way into the largest building. I fought soldiers, and defeated them easily using super-strength. I smashed them into walls, through walls, into each other, and worse. If doors were closed, I casually smashed them down, or just walked through the wall (physically breaking it down, not phasing through). At one point, to get to the floor above me, I just super-jumped up, smashed through the ceiling, and ended up on the floor above! In combat, I used a form of super-speed (the same mental power that propels me in flight) to bash into soldiers, to get a bit of extra punch. Anyway, I couldn't find my target. I grabbed a soldier, and forced him to tell me where his commander was. The soldier told me he was in the small building across from the big one I was in. I walked over to it, and casually bashed in the massive steel door. There he was, the target. Suddenly, I was attacked by several soldiers that came running at me from the courtyard. They stabbed me with their knives (in the chest and abdomen), but my skin was as solid as Superman's and they did not penetrate. It felt very uncomfortable, though. I easily "defeated" the soldiers. Again, very violent moment coming up. I turned to the surviving soldiers, as I was holding another one in my iron grip. I told them I would rip their buddy's head off. The commander mockingly said he doubted I could do that. The soldiers, on the other hand, said he should not doubt my words. They'd seen me in action before. Eager to prove my power, I started violently jerking my prey's head to the back. I used my mental "lucid powers" to imagine it being easy, but it still gave a lot of resistance. In the end, I could see a red "line" in his neck where the skin started tearing from the pressure... That's where the dream ended. It was ludicrously violent, but it felt so good. I was an absolute terror, the "anti-Superman". It felt... liberating! The entire dream had a pretty cool pop-rock soundtrack, and I think I may have heard the song in real life before.

In a later dream, I was an "escort dude", or gigolo. People were standing by a black board, and had to "grade me". Disturbingly, my mother was there too, and also graded me (gross!).

I was in a classroom, among teenagers, but I was an adult myself. I lost my temper, as the other managed to say things that got under my skin and made me relive the horror of my own high school years (and history with bullying). I was desperate to affirm my superiority over them ("I'm an adult, you can't bully me anymore!") but felt utterly powerless. Guess that's why I enjoy ripping DC's heads off...

I was carrying trash bags while riding on a motorcycle through my hometown. One bag in each hand... Cool 80's synth music played in the background.

I'm in a gloomy house with a bunch of other people (15 of them, give or take). I think they were all family. They had a bit of a "Russian" vibe. Someone rang the doorbell, and an older man dressed in a hooded raincoat (?) went to open the door. I think it was another family member, as he embraced them and let them in. I think I was wearing a mask as I embraced someone else, possibly because there was some kind of "plague" going around? At some point we're all walking through the garden, on a wooden boardwalk. I notice a large, odd plant. It had large flowers, but looked ominous. Suddenly it starts shooting spikes made of bone from the flowers. I yell "down, down!" but some people are impaled by the spikes and badly hurt. There was this "prophecy", that the entire family would be killed somehow. I figured this had to be the beginning.

I was (once again) with a bunch of other people, this time somewhere on the streets, fighting the Nazis. I think we were in some kind of cage? Or a kind of open, rectangular structure, anyway. We had AKs, but there were just too many Nazis, so we had no choice but to surrender and lay flat on the ground. In the next scene, we were all seated at a large rectangular table. We were all pretty depressed, as the Nazi chiefs were reading a list of our offences and made it clear we would be executed. But suddenly, something 'clicked' in my head. I figured we were as good as dead anyway, so what was stopping me from trying something? And another realization came to me. I remembered being here before. I somehow felt that they could not hurt me. Once again, a faux-lucid episode. I managed to break free from the ropes they'd used to tie me up (mind over matter, 'there is no rope') and get up. Then, I attacked the Nazi generals one by one. I grabbed their heads and snapped their necks, actually. Some were easy, some took a bit of force. Hitler himself (played by a very pale 'actor' who didn't really look like Hitler at all) even mocked me while I was trying to wrench his head off. I got them eventually, I think. I started freeing the others. Their arms were restrained with rope in impossibly complicated knots, but using my 'dream powers', I could easily undo them without looking, by pure force of will. One of them was a really pretty girl I instantly liked. But they seemed "distant", perhaps shocked? Afraid? I did just single-handedly butcher all of Nazi high command.

I remember a creepy and disturbing scene of a woman who was to be executed. She was naked, and very small, only about a foot tall. She was tossed in a bucket along with some other garbage (rags?), and then corrosive fluid was poured into the bucket. Afterwards, I went through the bucket to find her remains. All I found was red liquid everywhere. She'd been liquefied.

Hard to explain. We were in a classroom, only the floor was water. Yes, imagine a giant swimming pool with floating chairs and desks. Our whole class from my senior year in HS (9 years ago) was there, attending class. I think they were messing around and teasing me again, throwing pieces of paper, things like that. Later on, we were playing a game of 'the floor is made of lava'. There were this floating obstacles and stuff in the water, and you had to traverse the room without falling into the water. At some point I had on walk on two very thin ropes, and I almost fell. I could barely hold onto them, and keep from falling into the water entirely.

It started with a non-lucid dream. I was in a supermarket (or I was a disembodied "camera", I can't really recall doing anything myself). I watched a scene between some people working there. A few I "remembered" (not really) from when I worked there in 2009, some I didn't (part-timers, students working for the summer). I thought to myself that I had to apply for a job, and that they would need more workers for the summer. I somehow thought it was August. Then I was reminded it was late September already.

This part contains another "faux-lucid" section. I think I was with my mother and uncle in a forest. At some point I got too far away from them, and I lost sight of them behind a hill. I don't recall how it happened, but I learned I could float, and fly. I tried to do a backwards loop, but I got very disoriented and felt like I would fall. I came down (fears materialize in dreams), but did so in a stylish "superhero" fashion. I thought I would scatter the rocks on the forest floor in all directions (like in the movies, where they leave a big hole, or crack in the concrete when they land), but this didn't happen. I started flying off. At some point I was flying between two very long (and very old) walls made of old stone (looked medieval), towards a large structure at the end (a medieval ruin in the forest?). I tried to fly as fast as possible. I could "stretch my mind" to speed up a fair bit, but when I yelled "faster!" it got really fast. I suck at estimating speed, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was close to 5,000 kilometers per hour. Interestingly, despite seeing the wall fly past me faster and faster, the "tunnel" appeared to stretch on and on, and the castle didn't come closer any faster, despite my ludicrous speed. I guess my mind lacks the "rendering capacity" to render new environments when traveling at this speed. I have experienced a similar phenomenon when running at super-speed in a previous dream years ago. Eventually, I smashed into the wooden gate of the castle at 10,000 per hour. It was hilarious. I was kind of "peeled off" the door, and fell to the ground unharmed. Part of me was still stuck to the door. It was like in the cartoons.

I stood up, and noticed two figures standing in the long corridor I just flew through. One was dressed like a Roman, the other (behind him) a different ancient culture, but I can't recall which. I went up to the Roman, and asked him a question ("what are you doing here, soldier?"). I "knew" he was only a DC. I couldn't play along with him anymore, and burst out in laughter. He started laughing too, obviously mirroring me. Then he pulled out a lance. I wanted to see what would happen if he tried to stab me with it. I knew I was invincible anyway. He aimed his lance at my chest, but this felt uncomfortable, so I moved the top to my stomach instead. Suddenly he was on a horse, running fast, with me stuck on his lance - as if he was jousting. I figured he wanted to smash me into something. Anyway, it didn't "hurt", as I predicted, but it did feel uncomfortable. I thought to myself, "mind over matter". But before I could try to make the feeling go away, I was already waking up.

Dream that involved a train or subway station. It was a long and creepy dream, but I recall no details.

Another faux-lucid dream. I was restrained by a former colleague (don't recall which one), who had put chains around my wrists. He knew I could easily break them if he used just one normal chain, so he used several, made from very thick metal. So, he was aware of my lucid powers, and so was I, even though I don't think I was lucid! I was keen on showing the bastard he couldn't stop me, the dreamer, and tried to break the chains. The first time, I couldn't. Then I focused, convincing my mind the chains aren't real (there is no spoon!) - and this time they broke. I remember menacingly walking after an older man who worked there as well, scaring the hell out of him. He fled in terror, and I felt somewhat bad for him. I yelled after him that he should retire (???). I also (for the umpteenth time) learned to levitate and then fly, which I used during my attempts to terrorize my ex-colleagues.