Schmaven's Dream Journal of Randomness

In a crowded section of New York City, flames erupt from the sewers as Satan himself rises from hell and bursts through the pavement of the road ahead of me, sending cars flying through the air and people running and screaming in all directions. He has a gang of demons around him, all made of flames, forming a painful looking perimeter of death and destruction around the Devil.

I am holding a dark gray cat, almost black, with white on its face and some of its paws I don't remember picking it up, but it seems to like being held. I cradle it on its back like a baby in my left arm, against my side, and hold its tail out in front of me like a cannon. I aim it at the Devil and make my best "Pew Pew!" noises. Almost like a "pshhyeeeoo!!!" As I make my very best laser noises, bright blue laser beams shoot out of the cats tail. They move through the air at about the speed of a jogger, so Satan easily dodges them.

I run toward Satan, aiming the cat's tail a few paces ahead of him and with "Pew Pew Pew Pew!" shoot four slow moving lasers out of the cat's tail into Satan's path. I almost got him this time! With great enthusiasm I go wild with my best "Pew Pew!" noises, filling the streets and alleys with blue lasers. 'If I shoot lasers everywhere, I can't miss.' I tell myself.

Satan dives behind a sky scraper and out of sight. I pre-fire a few laser blasts from the cat's tail down the next street in case he tries to run for it, and then run down the alley to cut him off before he can get away. He gave me the slip somehow, and I haven't got a clue where to find him now. I find myself at a busy intersection, looking every which way as traffic flows through. Next to me is a fire fighter and a cop. They look at me, then at the cat I'm cradling in my arm, and then at how I'm holding the cat's tail out in front of me with my other hand, and then look back to me.
"Check this out" I tell them as I aim the cat's tail in a harmless direction and say "Pew Pew Pew!" sending three bright blue laser beams slowly through the air.
"That's pretty cool" they tell me.
"I know, right?!"
"Aren't you going to film it or take a picture or something?" The firefighter asks me.
"No, I don't think anyone really needs to know about this. Plus I've gotta get Satan"
They both give me an understanding nod, and I start walking away as I think about where to look.

In a group of people, we are all taken prisoner. Our captors try to get me to give out information to help them capture and kill more people, but I refuse. They threaten to kill me if I don't tell them. I think that's a good reason to die. I get pushed down to the ground, and they threaten me again. I close my eyes and go to my happy place. I hear machine gun fire, and feel bullets ripping through my flesh. My shoulders, arms, legs and torso are all hit repeatedly, and I can tell the bullets pass right through me. I'm in shock. I can't open my eyes. I don't want to open my eyes. My visual awareness starts to swirl together and then get all whispy. Although my eyes are closed, even the glittering blackness begins to fade. Then I see horrible faces all around, like dark gray demons scowling and growling at me with menacing faces. I don't feel that I have a body anymore, just a consciousness. I generate my best mind of Love for all the demons, but it's pretty clear that regardless of what I do, I'm going to a very bad place right now. I pray for help, confident that no matter how late, there's always help to be had if I'm open to it and want it. The demons fade into a dark gray for a bit and then come back. This definitely feels like dying. It also feels like I'm going to hell or something like that, but I'm not terrified. I'm a little bummed out because I don't think I'll like it, but I think it's worth it to help everyone. With what seems like my last moment of this stream of consciousness, I sincerely pray for everyone to attain enlightenment. Suddenly it all seems hilarious. I get a few brief visions of Vajrayogini smiling at me. Then I wake up.

A friend and I are chased out of a Tibetan village by angry men trying to kill me with rocks and sticks. We run down a trail through the woods, straight into an old WWII tank, shooting directly at us. The tank shots don't go through big trees, but get stuck inside, and then explode, completely obliterating the trees. The same happens with rocks that we try to hide behind. We turn and run through more of the forest, off of any trail. Two people on a dirt bike are riding through the woods opposite of us, and 100ft to our right. I quickly drop to the ground so they don't see us, but they do. The person on the back of the dirt bike has a fully automatic rifle, and what appears to be lots of ammo.

We take cover behind some huge trees. I can see through one of the trees, and notice the rifle being aimed directly at me through the tree. So I crouch down as a bullet grazes my back, burning and tearing some of my skin off as it passes. This motivates me strongly to find safety from all this chaos. My friend and I run to a rope-bridge that crosses a large chasm, but soon find that we are now surrounded, people who want us dead on both sides of the bridge.

I kneel down, and draw a symbol I've never seen before, looking mostly like a 4. As I draw it, I say something about "We will be safe". It glows a bit. I trace it again, saying the same words, and it glows more. I repeat that a third time, semi-aware that we will be shot in a matter of seconds here on the bridge. The symbol glows brightly, radiating light all over, and I am immediately transported to Hell!

Standing on an invisible energy floor in the middle of a ring of gnarly floating rocks, glowing red and on fire, this whole mass just floats far above what looks like the ground level. Lots of other flaming / glowing rocks float around, most are massive, the size of multiple cruise liners. There are stone bridges and passageways leading from one to the other. I feel safe here, because I doubt any of my attackers would actually go to hell, even if it was just to kill me.

I seem to be alone in Hell, no one else around. All I hear is flames, and the creaking of really hot rocks. It all looks quite amazing. I walk down a rock staircase to a lower level, and find myself face to face with a massive demon. About 15 times my height, very thin, his feet and hands are massive blades, and he appears to be completely composed of strong metal. He steps on me, cleaving me in two rather effortlessly. Instead of dying, I find myself in one piece again nearby this same beast. Mostly still feeling happy to be free from those people shooting at me, I'm not afraid of this demon at all. Sensing this, he walks away disappointed. I walk along a rock path, either side of which is a vast expanse of molten rock, glowing bright orange and yellow, gently undulating as it flows around. I come across another giant demon beast. This one looks like a combination of a pit-bull, the incredible hulk, and a giant boulder with massive spikes on it. This demon is bulging with muscles and thick, rough skin, mostly black, but glowing red in the creases. Kind of the texture of a massive tree with big chunky tree bark. He has big spikes on his shoulders, and lots of pointy fangs, sort of drooling as he growls at me. Since I went to hell to be safe, I'm not afraid of him. He charges me, and I just watch to see what happens. He bites me, eating the top half of my body. Everything goes black for a bit, then I re-materialize right in front of him again, just watching curiously. He too gets discouraged and leaves. They seem to only enjoy mauling me when I'm afraid.

I explore around a bit, taking in the massive mountains of glowing spikey rocks, and rivers of magma. The whole ambiance of this place is a rather soothing red/orange/yellow color. I find it pleasing to my eyes.

I then wake up to my room being only a degree or two below body temperature, and I've sweat through everything. A similar temperature perception to the dream.

Trying to go to hell, I manage to find myself in an old, abandoned mental hospital. There are a few zombies around, so I lock myself in an old dorm room so they can't distract me. There is a medium sized hole in a wall, with a metal cover blocking access to it. If I can get through there, surely hell will be on the other side. I have exactly the tools I need to take the cover off, and begin working the screws loose. There are 7 hex screws, with one torque screw in the corner.

I notice a food elevator in the corner. I peek inside and along a series of mirrors is a person looking back at me! I duck and try to hide from view, but she saw me.

Some non-zombie people come in, and tell me it's not safe here because of the zombies outside. They try to convince me to join them and move to a safer place. Also, they are serving dinner right now, and I'd be just in time for it. They start to help me pack up my stuff into bags that they have with them. Really preferring to check out hell instead, I tell them that I'd rather eat in a few hours, and to just lock me in here until then. I'll be safe. They aren't thrilled, but agree to do this, and leave me in the dimly lit, damply cold dorm room again, with its stone walls, and tile floor.

With the cover now off, the hole is too small to fit through. I decide to just fall asleep, and then I can fit through any size hole because I'm dreaming. I have a few hours so this should be easy.

I lay down on a wooden plank used for beds to fall asleep and wake up.