Red Queen Theory

Wicca shop

Shopping for incense. Someone pawned a red quartz crystal. I was tinkering with a Santa display and moving pieces around.

Ether

Someone goes around ethering people. To cover his tracks he tazers himself.

Mexican bus

Watching a van of five Mexicans plan their next move.

Hospital

I'm in a hospital bed and it seems I have a camera lodged in my chest. The doctor is preparing to remove it.

Toby Search

Searching for Toby when I eavesdrop on a woman. She's in what appears to be Venna when things go wrong with a group of seemingly unrelated people. A black ops team is dispatched to pick up individuals from Venna, including the woman. The man I end up following appears to be Toby but I have no confirming evidence it's him. From very far away he gets into a rubber transport boat alone and makes his way straight into Venna. He picks her up and successfully escorts her to the open sea.

They reach a shore where the man abandons the boat and the woman arrives safely to shore, greeted by submerged members of an elite team as well as a woman at the shore line who appeared less covert. The lady in the boat jumped into the water, big fancy dress and all and the made her way to land.

Al Brian

A friend from elementary school makes an appearance. I'm running from a crazy man through the snow. I get to a populated area where Al Brian lifts me above his head and literally tosses me toward a building. Problem is it's on a hill and I'm having issues holding onto anything. Luckily I see his girlfriend and a couple other girlfriends of my friends and I use them as leverage. I successfully make it inside when I say to myself, "Oh my god, thank you for girlfriends and exgirlfriends!" .... lol

Cutting in line

I'm at a place I need to get something from. A guy I'm with cuts in front of everyone. I scold him but noone seems to mind and we were in a rush.

Shot at

It starts out with a group of about 20 people. We're all being hunted by this guy, the guy is some sort of mercenary. We manage to make it to a building, he has us all cornered. We all climb onto a fence as we're escaping and we're slowly making progress in until he opens fire and manages to take out a number of us. I notice the fence right behind me falls, revealing a large canyon below, taking someone with it.

I pause for a moment, unable to move. The man behind me tells me to keep moving, we need to move. I snap out of it and head into a building. We get inside and we're still being shot at. The only thing to hide behind is a three teir mattress bed. I barely manage to grab hold of the bottom piece because it's bigger than the other two pieces. I'm thankful the bottom mattress was bigger otherwise I wouldn't have anything to hold onto. I manage to pull myself on top of the mattress, along with the remaining others, keeping my head low. I think the floor was missing for the most part. The bullets keep flying and it's almost like he's shooting fish in a barrell. Finally once we're all inside, the windows become bulletproof and anything below the window line was reinforced enough to the point where bullets couldn't pass through.

I finally sat back on the bed and caught my breath while staring at him and continually reinforcing the windows with energy.

He was pretty upset.

Super Teens

I'm in a prison for teens with 'super powers'. I watch three escape through the plumbing and when I'm questioned the scene convienetly changes to where I'm collecting inventory of about 20 various drug pipes. My superier has me sign the inventory log and it looks like she was helping me/showing me how things are run.

Dream or not dream?

I'm not sure if this was a dream or not but I remember waking up (FA maybe?) and I was feeling incredibly sick, nauseaus, and just beat. I thought something was near me (something I probably did not want near me) and so I quickly put up a bright white light shield around me. I felt better enough to go back to bed at which point I did and in the morning I was fine. I thought that was weird.

Goals: Remain open. Find Toby (guide-type person).


It's coming closer

Note: Dreaming is different lately. The past few days to a week have been a tad more real but more importantly, less hazy and dream-like. Many are coming in clear, many have people teaching me things or showing me things... and some are even allowing me to exert very direct and intentional actions. It's just awesome... I'm getting to play more

Going to the organ wash (you know, it's similar to a car wash but ... with organs)

I get picked up by an alien lifeform. I'm not frightened, just curious. We wind up at a very large machine. Next thing I know I'm watching my organs (like heart, liver, all the great necessary parts) being placed on a conveyer belt. Hrrrrm. Don't I need those? They appear very life-like too. Bloody, gushy lookin, quite interesting. They go through, they get scrubbed and washed down. As they continue along their path, I trail behind them, watching each step. I almost get caught on a random machine part which causes me to question my solidity. I release that worry and just decide to ignore it as it doesn't make much sense anyway.

It's finally over, the organs are removed and somehow placed back into me... what's interesting is that I don't know how they took them out or put them back in. I look down at my body and notice I have blood on my legs. They also feel pretty sore, like the morning after running a short marathon. The alien being, which I can't see a form to or my mind lacked the ability to put a form to it, comes over and washes my legs off with something. I notice others around now, about my age. They're taking blood stained towels and wiping themselves down. I follow suit before being cleaned further.

I end up in a large room with others. A guy about my age walks up to me and starts chatting. I'm not really in a chatty mood, I'd prefer to be left alone in my thoughts to assess the environment. Not answering him, he steps closer. I see a thought pop into his mind, he's wanting to test me... possibly thinking I'm retarded or only half-here. The moment I see his thought I look directly at him and give him a very knowing, specific, and most likely creepy stare. I size him up then tell him telepathically (not sure if he could here it or not but I know he felt the message), "Don't even try it. I will give you a serious beatdown if you do. Back off." I walk away to explore and he doesn't follow.

Ghosts in my house

I FA and walk of my bedroom. Something is strange and I have a look around the kitchen and living area. I turn around quickly when I hear something dropped over the stairs. I look to see who dropped it and it's a woman. She's clearly furious about something, just fuming. I walk over and try to ask her what's wrong. As she's talking (about things I can't recall) I begin to notice she's not 'real'. That makes me question my own realness at which point I become lucid. This doesn't really disturb the situation though, I keep listening.

In the middle of her rant I notice an old asian man walk by. He seems like he's in a trance or maybe he was just wandering aimlessly around the house. Now he freaked me out a little and he wasn't doing anything strange. I return my attention to the woman in front me, who claimed to be from my mom's side of the family. I question her and press her for more detailed information. She was playing with a necklace or bracelets in her hands, it had heart shaped ornaments on them. She said she was the daughter of some guy with a D name I can't recall. She continues her rant, her energy is making me upset and I explain I need to go. She asks me not to. I tell her I don't believe her and that I'm leaving. She steps very close to me, pleading with me to stay. I start demanding myself to wake up, not wanting to be near her.

I'm successful and write the dream down then go back to bed.

FA again

I FA AGAIN. I walk out of my bedroom, past the kitchen, and I glance from the kitchen into the dining room. I see the old asian man sleeping under the window. He looks so peaceful but I get that same creepy vibe about it. (For the record, I get a creepy vibe from just about every quiet ghost I've seen. I haven't seen many though! That's the thing, I think I've only had personal ghost encounters in dreams only a handful of times. Aliens, spirits, demons, etc are part of my regular diet, but ghosts are just in a league of their own.. to me at least.) After seeing the old man I realize I must be dreaming. I don't want to disturb him so I move away and back to my bedroom. I get stopped by the woman from before, claiming to be family.

I suddenly realize I must have checked with SOMEONE from our family or something.......... god I wished I remembered verifying her credentials so to speak.... anyway, I look at her and I have a very solid intuition that she is who she claims to be. That doesn't mean much though because I still don't know how I'd be able to help her.

I ask her what she wants and she starts going into a rant again. I can't hear anything she's trying to say to me because it all sounds like complete gibberish. I tell her I don't understand how she expects me to help her. I need to know what she wants. I think we both become more frustrated at our lack of communication and I finally walk away, unable to do anything because I can't understand what she wants.

As I walk around the upstairs I begin to notice other spirits just hanging around... lounging even. Honestly, I found it all pretty disturbing. I mean one or two ghosts .... fine. But a room full? What if they all want something? What if they all want to be heard or helped? I can barely manage my own agenda, what would I do with all of theirs? I don't like that sort of pressure... not to mention just being directly involved with their energy really puts me in an uncomfortable state.

Toby (?) and sneaking onto a military base

I'm with a guy I seem to know because I'm following him around the outskirts of a military base. I'm complaining to him about the situation but agree to go along with it because he seems eager to get this done. I can't recall much of this but I do remember coming across minor hiccups in his plan but overall it was interesting and worth it.

Costumes

I'm in a room with a large pile of costumes. I'm picking out what I'm going to wear and finally decide on something which has a red skirt with small white polka dots on it. Tacky but I wasn't wanting to spend all day picking out a disguise.

School

I was in a school... it didn't feel like an American school. It felt like we were in a castle actually. There was a guy here who stood out, he looked like Toby (on the taller side, musclarish but not body builder-like, tan, looked Hawaiian, generally good-looking.) He kept asking me questions, but discreetly. About simple things and I kept trying to keep to myself but with his constant questioning I found it difficult to remain anonymous.

Ettiquite training

Haha. I end up in a dream where I'm with someone who I used to play basketball with. Although she was nice to me in this dream and we got along well. We were discussing things when she pauses and turns to me. I can tell she wants to offer some advice but she's hesitating. I laugh and tell her to just say it, I could use some constructive critism. She relaxes and says what's on her mind. She starts walking over to a mutual friend of ours, a guy who looks like someone I know but isn't actually that person.

She's in between us and the guy and points to make her point. "If you see someone you know, walk closer to them to speak with them." I was already on my way over to a table between them and sat right when she said 'them'. She says, "Good girl" and I can't help but laugh to myself. I tell her I know that. It's rude to talk across a room... but I guess I still do that occasionally.

Next thing she points out, and at this point the guy takes a seat at the table with us. "If you bring something to eat, and even if you have only one piece left, you offer it to anyone in the room." I can't help but laugh but yeah, I've heard the food thing before, it's prevalent in Polynesian cultures. I start to wonder why she's telling me all of this. It all seems like common sense and yet, I guess I don't ALWAYS do it. Maybe I should? LOL

In the middle of her advice a girl walks up. It's her birthday and she passes around some candy and stuff. We celebrate it with her.. there was a lot of laughing. Good times.

~~~~

WILD ... but a VERY good one (to me at least)

I'm on the hunt for Toby and I remember it as I get plopped into a WILD. It's nighttime out and I'm at the middle school near my house (which is creepy at night). There's little to no lighting and I'm walking through the parking area when I start to hear odd noises, like a drumming or pounding, coming from further up ahead. I stop and consider if I want to continue that direction when I firmly decide, I do not. Lol.

I turn around and take the long route home. As I get to the street (with lighting!) I begin to relax... but I can feel the heaviness from the school creeping closer to me. I begin a nice paced jog at this point, not interested in being here much longer. I start calling out, "Toby! .... TOBY!?"

I see a guy skatingboarding on the street, he's heading my direction. I take a closer look and realize I can't see a solid body... he's slightly transparent.

Well that's new.

I hope it's Toby but as the guy gets closer it's clearly not Toby. Still, I'm interested in seeing who it is. I start flying as I realize I'm wanting to merge with him He comes up the hill and doesn't even notice me until I'm successfully inside of him (wow that sounds a little dirty but it wasn't!) Once I've merged with him we both stop, no longer moving the direction he was. I look around and decide I want to move down the hill, the opposite direction he was going. I don't feel much resistence from him so we head that way.

Then I see another person coming down the hill and I decide I want to demerge from the current person. I jump out of him and time it right to jump into the other person. Except this person isn't someone I'm able to jump into.. not sure why... BUT I'm able to hang onto them I hang on while we continue up the road, we seem to be moving at the speed of a car and I can't help but find it pretty fun.

Snooping around

At some point I let go and now I'm left standing at an apartment building of sorts. I look into an apartment which has their windows and doors open. It's daytime out now and it looks like there's two adults and and two young children inside. I stand at their door, their house is inviting. Lots of xmas stuff, creme colored drapes, just warm and friendly. As I'm standing at their door, inspecting their house (lol) I notice a young boy (maybe about six yrs old) falling asleep near the door. I kneel down and stare at him, curious. My head is about a foot away from the boy's when I see his eyes open slightly, then suddenly wide, like he saw something for a moment. Wait a minute... did he see me? I stay there in wonder when he's falling in and out of consciousness... each time he wakes slightly in his half daze he gives me a startled look but after a few times he just passes out.

At this point I start debating about entering the house. That's when I notice an .... entity sort of being inside. It's a rock .. a large one .. and the spirit inside of it is a protective one. I find it mildly intimidating but I'm still curious. I poke my finger inside the entryway, wondering if I'd even be able to enter. My finger finds no barrier so I probably could. Then I start to wonder about why I'd want to enter... which would be just to tinker and explore, which isn't a legit enough reason to risk playing with the guardian inside the rock so I decide to find another apartment.

OMG

I walk a short ways away and find a suitable aparment. The woman inside looks to be Portuguese. I walk into the kitchen area and start tinkering with porcelin made objects. As I'm touching them though the lady walks over... finding something unusual with her items. She just can't figure it out though... and clearly I'm still unseen.

Once I notice she's noticing something strange, I up things a bit. I start making bigger attempts to knock over or clang various objects until finally she forces her husband over to see what's going on.

I back off once I see the husband ... figuring I might be freaking her out a little too much. Standing about ten feet away from them I start to get an idea. Maybe I can merge with the husband. GREAT IDEA!

I quickly leap from my position and aim straight for him. Except I run into his left shoulder and bounce off. Wtf? That isn't right. Why can't I merge? I ponder it a moment before I decide I'm too solid. I need to become more energy like. I focus on speeding up my vibratory rate, with the intent to be less solid. It works but now I feel a little spacey... but I can hold this energy long enough to test out this theory.

Holding the current frequency I take a second leap into him. At first I wonder if it worked, because I'm lifting myself up from the ground again. Then I notice it's not MY legs I'm pushing up from. It's his. SWEET!

I take a look around, well, both of us do and I'm seeing things from his eyes. It feels different. I feel tall. I can feel him though... his mind. He's stronger than the others I've merged with. I think he might have been trying to push me out.

Suddenly I'm incredibly horny????????? WTF. Then I'm overwhelmed by sexual energy. I don't know what to do with it but all of a sudden I'm on the ground, playing with myself XD ... as a GUY ... in his body ... I'm so confused ... but so turned on. I don't know what's my mind or his but whatever it is we're getting carried away.

His wife walks over, still confused by her dishes, but the guy suddenly has this stage fright and doesn't want to be seen playing with himself. So he hides it and she doesn't notice.

The sexual energy is so intense that now I'm getting turned on and close to ... finishing ... hahahaha. I'm wondering how this'll work.. if I can really have an orgasm merged with a man... but it would very much appear I can.

I'm like ... seconds away from climaxing when I become too annoyed with the situation of mine vs his that I want to demerge from him. Slowly I try to move my right arm out from his, reaching back around him, trying to touch myself ... as I'm slowly feeling my torso leaving his. I get far enough out that I can feel myself but once I've completely demerged from him, all that sexual energy and just the jerk of leaving his body was enough to wake me.

I woke up VERY annoyed

Goals: Be open. Find Auron if I can. I had another lucid dream which was very easy to stay in, thanks to my cough and cold medicine! I kept hearing noises from waking life but I could successfully keep myself linked and grounded in the dream, which was soooooooo weird. I'm starting to wonder if techniques could be used like how they did in the movie Inception.. I'd be up for some experiemental research if it was properly compensated

Beach Lucid

I'm at a beach with Kalai (ex) and I can't tell if it's actually him or someone my mind is using to represent another person. The beach is encircled by mountains and it's rainy, windy, and overcast. The waves are covering my feet and then going back out, the water is choppy and I start to get worried as the tide is becoming increasingly higher. The only exit is a narrow pathway which is around the edge of the island and over a reef. I decide to leave when I randomly become lucid. No clear trigger this time either. Kalai seems to have gotten the same idea too because both us move to leave at the same time. We start making our way out around the edge of the mountain while getting hit with small waves. Right before I turn the corner I see a door leading into the mountain? It's opening so I stop walking and look, some large burly man comes out from it and a woman is behind him, pushing him out, haha. I stop and see if they need assistance but they seem fine so I mind my own business and make my way further from the beach.

Guy who shoved me yesterday

I'm trying to catch up with Kalai when the guy from yesterday shows up. He grabs my hand and starts leading me someplace. I lose focus of everything but his hand. He feels so real again, I feel like there's no other place I'd want to be ... I think it's because it felt so safe? Not just safe but ... warm? I lose track of where we are as things start to blur around me. We finally come to a halt and he releases my hand. He tells me, "I need to check with the council to be sure it's ok you're with him."

OMG, WTF?! So there IS a council? A REAL one? Which one? The yellow people? DETAILS, DETAILS! I get all excited and then I realize the other stuff, like, it's 'ok I'm with him'... who is him? Obviously it's Kalai but is it HIM or the person my mind won't allow me to see and just uses him as a stand-in. I'm completely annoyed I can't figure out if it's actually Kalai or not... and if not, WHO IS HE?!

The man I'm with walks me over to a pool area. I see two black metal chairs, I have a seat and look around. When I look back to the chair I notice there's one more... which is odd but whatever. The man takes a seat on the other end, leaving a chair in the middle, then I wonder if another person is going to show up.

I quickly ask, "Ok, so who are you exactly?" He's about to explain, like seriously explain, when a dragonfly type of thing appears. I don't want it to bite me but it's making me nervous and annoyed. It keeps buzzing in my face and I swat it away. Then one gets caught in my hair and I can feel the little insecty feet against my skin and I finally have enough of it and give it a really hard swat..... which wakes me up because I've successfully hit my nightstand XD

I WAS SOOOOOOO MAD! So close to finding out who this man was, what the council is, and what the big deal is about me hanging out with anyone. OMG I was so annoyed. I went back to bed but ended up in a different dream.

Race

I'm on a jet ski, the driver is a chick, she's not someone I know from waking life. We begin racing through a river, there are random obstacles on the way, then we head through a forest on a dirt path... while still on the jet ski... and then a jungle... beautiful really. We were doing well but suddenly on the fifth lap or so she stops and tells me we're done. I ask her what's going on, we were doing really well and she doesn't explain further. I shrug and walk into an elementary school.

I enter the cafeteria as that's where most people are after the race and I don't know what I'm looking for but linger around anyway. Then I see Kalai's dad and I walk over. I ask him where Kalai is and he said he's around here somewhere. I'm debating whether I want to go look for him, I get the feeling I shouldn't, but I do it anyway, my curiosity getting the better of me.

I go outdoors and start looking. I never find him but I see guys playing basketball. I stand and watch them for a bit when the coach walks up to me and two others. We start talking and I ask if it's a co-ed team, he says it is. I consider playing but at the moment I'm sipping on a beer which I have no idea where it came from. The coach delivers some spiritual assessments to us, using basketball as the metaphor. He says something to the others like, "The future is powerful" ... when he gets to me he says something kinda cool, but then I take another swig of my beer and just nod and stare, trying to figure out how legit this guy is. I decide I can't play right now, I'm having a beer and relaxing ... but maybe later.

Had a couple other dreams... can't remember them. I've been really bad about writing dreams down as soon as I wake up.

Goals: I've been pretty sick lately, coughing and general cold symptoms. Despite the sickness though, I've been in an upswing and able to focus surprisingly well.

Two days ago:

Alien technology

I'm in a large control room monitoring numerous screens. I notice I'm on a lift which is foot controlled. Minimal movements (sort of like using a segway) allowed me to control the lift. I'm assessing movements and gathering intelligence. I see where I need to go and head that way.

Girl in a shop

I enter a shop. I'm very familiar with the shop and also the girl behind the counter. I keep my face from her but she recognizes me anyway. I turn around and calmly ask her to stay. There was a fight with her and someone else I'm well acquainted with. She listened and we were able to discuss something.

Beach Fragment

I'm on a beach, wearing a white swim suit... can't remember what happened but it left a strong memory... of something I can't remember XD

Annoying visitor

I'm doing some gardening at home. Someone knocks at a door but it doesn't feel like a door, it feels like a portal. I open it, it's a woman. I hold the door open but prevent her from crossing, asking what she'd like. She asks to come in, I tell her I'm busy, then my gerbil or her gerbil sneaks past me, curious. I leave the door to retrieve the animal. She enters now. I'm mildly annoyed but go back to what I was doing. She's standing there now, yapping, nagging, I find myself very much not wanting her to be here. She says something very thoughtless, I can't remember what, but I pick up one of the pots of dirt and lift it over her head, deliberately dropping some of the dirt on her head. She's angry but stays and continues whatever rant she was on.

I continue to disregard her and find five large mango seeds, beautiful seeds, healthy, fresh, I'm very pleased. I move to pot them when things fade.

Timeline

I'm trying to remember a previous dream from this night and fall asleep in a WILD by accident. I'm with other gerbils (lol) and they're helping me work out a timeline for the dream. The timeline was drawn on the cement with chalk and it was just about finished and I was reviewing it, trying to cement it in my memory. As I was doing this though I realized it really was A LOT to remember. I knew there'd be no way I could take it all back with me... I wish I had just asked for a synopsis.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Last Night



Becoming Lucid

I'm alone in a house, just wandering around. I find a gun, try to shoot it, it's broken. As I'm trying to pull it apart and fix it, it starts behaving very strangly, almost choking on itself? It's shaking at which point I'm concerned it'll go off on it's own. I back myself over to the door and then toss the gun away, not wanting it to misfire or explode in my hand. As I release it, I suddenly become lucid. I start to wonder what I'd like to do and don't want to waste time like how I normally do. I remember I've been wanting to find more information about something and start along that train of thought.

Shoved

I'm in sort of library, I see many bookcases lining the walls. There's a man walking with me, I'm not sure who he is but he feels familiar and friendly. He's taller than I am and takes me by the arm, he's whispering something in my ear, feeding me information. I see someone up ahead who I instinctively want to avoid. The man tells me the same but also, "He found you. You need to leave." Wtf? "Wait, who is he?" Before I can finish my inquiry a door appears to my left and I get shoved very firmly through it. The touch of his hand on my back felt incredibly real.... more real than a real hand if that makes any sense. The touch not only stabilized everything for me but it also transferred some of who he was to me. Not specifics but energy patterns and his was very vivid and clear.

I stumble out the door and find myself on a large catwalk. I think he's behind me but I'm not sure because it also felt like he was still in the other dream... which is a little weird. I'm looking for an exit when I see bathroom stalls. It's private enough to flip the dream so I lock myself in a stall quickly. I'm standing there with my eyes closed, focusing on transporting myself someplace else when I get inturrupted mid focus by a knock on the door. I slowly open the door, kind of hoping I'll be at my destination... but I'm disapointed.

I see the man who was trying to find me, he was naked, anorexic appearing, sickly looking. I can feel the fear beginning to creep into me which prompts me to address it. I ask him what he wants then I rationalize my fear which allows me to release it. I'm trying to figure out who he is... I have a few people from waking life I'm trying to avoid or put distance between me and them... some for very legit reasons, some for safety reasons, and then there's all the nonsense from dreaming and people who randomly are hunting me, so between those two worlds, it's not clear who this guy is and I'd really like to know. As I'm waiting for an answer the man from earlier who was helping me shows up. He's watching. A third man shows up, a friend of my friend.

I can feel things slipping away from me, the dream is fading, my mind races to find a way to keep myself here. I resort to sexual energy, that always being something tangible and firm to anchor myself. I swirl it up through my feet, through my chest, and into my head. Immersed in so much of it I open my eyes, everything more vivid and stable, I smile at my effort then realize I should tone it down, I don't need THIS much sexual energy surging through me. I release some of it so that I'm comfortable and then listen to what the others are saying.

The four of us are standing there when someone starts shooting? There are guns or arrows flying, I get hit a time or two. My two friends who I recognize now as protectors look a little........... lost? LOL. They scramble and I'm somewhat conrfused by their reactions. I jokingly say to them, "Well, go ahead, protect me." The younger one who showed up late gives me a sort of pissed off look, not appreciating my joke, heh.

Then I hear them discussing between themselves, "Oooh, she's about to wake up, here we go." Wtf? They know when I'm going to wake up? yeah, I admit I can be a wuss sometimes and just simply opt-out of nightmares or pain for that matter... and sometimes it's not always intentional, but still ... come on. I decide to prove them wrong and anchor myself to the dream, without any sort of tactic or tool, just the pure desire to prove them wrong.

As I step forward I can feel the ache of an injury to my left hip. It's painful, I know I'm bleeding, it's enough to wake me up but I push through it, mind over matter. As I'm almost to the man who shoved me to safety earlier I see him get snatched up by something. The two of them are now free-falling over a very very high ledge/cliff. I immediately race to the edge of the catwalk thing and begin my own free-fall. I have them in view but I'm getting worked up a little, I feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins, my heart is racing, I need to calm down. I focus on flying now, I have to get to him, I can't let him be taken. I say to myself, 'Yeah, you thought I was going to wake up, but guess who had nighttime cough and cold medicine before bed. That's right, ME! I'm not waking up so easily this time...'

I manage to get closer to them, the demon thing that attacked him isn't letting go, we're all plumeting to our ... death? Dream shifts, we're now in a desert still in free-fall. I reach out, determined to not only fly but also be faster than them... I must free him... I get close enough, and now I question how I planned on releasing my friend from the grip of the other. I didn't plan this far ahead. Prying at him proves unsuccessful, fighting him doesn't make a difference either. Suddenly it hits me. Panther form. I can feel myself transforming into panther form and then taking ruthless bites out of the person/demon/thing that had him. It seems to work and as we finally land on solid ground I feel slowly begin to wake.

Kara?

As I assume I'm waking up it just turns out I'm waking up in yet another dream. Something turns me lucid or I carry it over from the previous dream. I'm in a little town when I'm captured by two or three women. They seem normal though, normal being human. I need to leave and can't stay here but they're determined to keep me with them. I stay, not wanting to fight, they're well-intentioned just somewhat misguided.

I see one girl who catches my eye. Standing in front of her I focus on her... I thoughtfully ask her, "May I show you something?" She looks surprised but agrees to it. I gently place my hands on her head, I notice she has either dark brown or black shoulder length hair, she looks to be of asian ethnic background but mixed with other ethnicities. She was very pretty. As my hands are resting on her head I show her an image of a moonlit beach, then I hear the song play (the song I posted in this entry) ... I calm myself, releasing all other internal noise from my energy, focusing on just this one thought/memory/moment, then I transfer the energy into her.

We watch the scene together, a scene which there are no images, the images are pure emotion, strong emotions, as she's receiving my message, I can sense she feels it. So I push further, showing her more, as much as she can understand.... her mind is so open, so compassionate, caring, deep .... she feels exactly what I'm showing her. I'm getting caught up in my own message, my own emotions... I begin to feel things flowing more intensely. The transfer is opening up my own channels as she's beginning to ask why and wanting to understand, to know more. I show her as much as she cares to know. Until I feel tears beginning to form. Not tears of sadness but tears of love, of hope... hope that I'll achieve what I'm after. My purpose for living. For breathing. She's seen enough, felt enough, I begin to end the transfer and then slowly remove my hands from her head.

I look at her, her wet eyelids, and simply smile. I know she understands and if she still feels she wants to stop me, I would stay willingly. I was amazed by her capacity to feel, to love, to receive. I wanted to know her name and as soon as I silently asked, I heard it. Her name is Kara. I respect her greatly. I waited for her to move to stop me as I began to walk away, out of their grasp. She didn't.

(I woke up and heard her name so loudly and clearly, but stupidly forgetting to write it down, I'm only left with a slight memory of it. It was either Kara or Kaya.)

~~~~~~

Last night was one of the greatest mind fucks I've had in a long time. Who knows what 'reality' really is but the dreaming world gives waking life a real run for its money.