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    False Awakening

    1. Advanced TotM (one fail and one success, I think)

      by , 06-21-2017 at 04:54 AM
      So, after reading a little bit about lucid dreaming and going 'back to bed', I soon found myself in a familiar state. I was lying in my bed listening to a Podcast... but realized that whatever Podcast I was listening to, obviously wasn't real. I was lucid.

      I induced what I call the vibrational state and slowly separated from my body OBE-style. My sense of touch came before the visuals. I found myself in a replica of the house I was sleeping in, and quickly I set out to do the tasks. It wasn't a particularly vivid lucid. But, for some reason, the laws of physics were on point (in a lucid that I was supposed to change myself in the mirror).

      Looking at myself in the living room mirror, I tried hard to put some abs and more muscle in my body or something like that. But nothing. After trying hard, the only thing I managed to do was: make myself more tanned. (and even that, took me some mental acrobatics).

      I thought that, maybe, if I went to another, less familiar house, it might be easier to change my appearance I flew to some house in my neighborhood (that, for some reason, was near the beach now). I tried to do the same thing in the mirror of this imaginary house. But, as I was taking off my shirt, just at the moment when the t-shirt covered my vision, I lost visuals and woke up...

      PS: After flying to the second house and attempting once more the advanced task #1, I looked up at the sky to see if I could attempt advanced task #2, but it was cloudy and no stars where to be seen... I thought about clearing up the sky and attempting the task... but, I thought: "yeah, if I couldn't give myself abs, I'm not clearing up this sky and making stars fall unto Earth anytime soon." Lol, so I didn't even attempt to do it.

      All in all, I had fun.

      Updated 06-21-2017 at 05:02 AM by 70682

      Tags: mirror, sky
      lucid , false awakening , task of the month
    2. Corpse Forest

      by , 06-18-2017 at 08:26 AM (Cinder's Dreams Gallery)
      My dreams have been gross and painful to record lately, and there's no sign of it stopping, so I might as well write about it. Of course, if you're reading this, the reason it's public is because it's just embarrassing, not something that would actually be bad to share.

      I was with my parents. I can't remember what we were doing. We stopped at the pagoda, Pra Pathom Chedi. I walked away from them, stopped, walked to where they were.

      I was browsing on my Discord group at some point, difficult to tell if it was a false awakening or not. I haven't been remembering to do reality checks lately. There was some drama and shocking things going on.

      I woke up in a completely unfamiliar apartment, next to my internet friends, yet I seem to talk to him through Discord. We cuddled while I discussed my earlier dream. He mentioned that he heard of one of the fucked up things I listed. I can't exactly remember but it was a website called "Corpse Forest", it films porn done on top of mounds of dead bodies found in a forest that people go to suicide.

      I woke up. I lapsed back into sleep while trying to do my reality checks, and they tested negative. Then I truly woke up, so that was worrying. I did my reality checks several times to make sure I really am awake this time.
    3. Zombear

      by , 06-16-2017 at 04:41 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)

      There is a large brown bear that was sort of a pet but it’s now becoming too aggressive. It wants in the house but I wont let it. I see it’s face pressed against the kitchen window then pawing at the back door. It’s going to destroy my house so I decide it’s time to get the hunting rifle. I load strange looking bullets into the gun. I note the bullets look awfully odd but assume it will work. I go out back and see the bear in out field. My kids appear and I tell them Alysha will just have to understand that I have no choice. I aim and the scope looks all weird but I fire anyway. I’m surprised the sound was so quiet. Looks like a miss so I try again. This time the gun fires 5 or 6 shoots at an incredible rate. The recoil throws my off balance. I look in the scope again and the bear is cut into a bloody mess.

      I noticed there were some wolves with the bear earlier so I figure I need to see why. I go around front and find a pelt of some animal under the front deck and decide that must be attracting them. I drag the pelt to the road and toss it across into the ditch. I am walking back to the house and spot the bloody bear in the back. I think I should dispose of the carcass as well. That's when I see it get up and start charging at me. I think werebear though its more of a zombie bear. It seems bigger now with massive tusk like teeth. It's charging fast on its hind legs. I am terrified looking for a way out. This is were I suddenly become lucid.

      I smile and tell the bear to bring it on while I stand there waiting. When it is close enough I punch it straight in the chest and send it flying high into the sky.

      I look down and see the bear charging at me again. It looks more humanoid this time and just as monstrous. I smile and stand my ground. Again I send it flying only to meet another. The next one looks more like a mass of blue plastic that mildly resembles the beast from before. I am still not worried. I put a shoulder down and charge back at it giving it a massive shoulder check sending the beast again high into the sky. I watch it get smaller and smaller. Then it stops, hovers and forms into a ball. I force push it to send it on a little more. There is something like streaks of blue magic like when a Jedi would use force push. I say, "Now your are a balloon." The beast ball calmly floats higher and higher until I can no longer see it. The beast does not return.

      I shout, "Whooo Hooo! Yeah! I love this!" I am happy about my victory but also very excited to be in a lucid dream. I start toward my house to find something else to do, but the dream feels finished and I wake up.

      I try to recall the dream but quickly find myself in FA. Canis Lucidus is doing dishes, scrubbing one of my pots. Some how the scrubbing action is tickling me and in the FA I wake up laughing because of this. This scene quickly fades and I wake for real.
    4. Trying to lucid dream again

      by , 06-12-2017 at 04:17 PM
      I just had a weird dream...

      I was outside, in the area where I live. Some really weird stuff happened in that dream. Then another dream happened, where I happened to look at my hands and see there was the wrong amount of fingers andbecome lucid. I am lucid for a while, but I don't really do anything and the dream ends after a while.
      [/COLOR] I woke up in reality.
    5. boring dreams.

      by , 06-11-2017 at 03:45 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)

      Weird dream where I'm walking around some warehouse party. I feel too uncomfortable to talk to anyone. I search the whole place but don't find anyone I recognize.

      Work stuff

      May have been an extension of the previous dream. It took place inside a huge Mcdonald's. C and M were there and I kept flying over them using gravity to get ahead of them. I wind up stealing a quarter pounder off the production line. I fly up somewhere to eat it LOL.

      Weird house

      Me and my brother are visiting some weird guy who has a strange layout to his house. There's a downstairs part where it's a gigantic maze and he has hidden treasures in various places. Me and my brother explore it for a bit. We wind up outside with the guy. He says he's christian but me and my brother scoff at that since his house was filled with occult books and orbs. He then starts praying in a weird language. Me and my brother just look at him weird.

      FA, Some people I don't recognize are in my room. A man is cleaning up after some girl who seems to be sick and he starts apologizing to me for her ruining my room. I later go to explore the house but I don't recognize what house I'm in.
    6. Crazy

      by , 06-10-2017 at 02:44 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)

      There's no way I can remember all the details of this. I spent most of the REM period having False awakenings in a large white room. This is undoubtedly a remote viewer/templar attack. I was intercepted on the way to check on Bjork and heal her if need be. At least that was my plan falling asleep.

      In the dreams I'm with a large creepy bald guy. Half of the dreams have another woman in them, L from work. I remember she was present during the last attack in my inner world where I told her it was a dream during a lucid and I witnessed her do a hand reality check. In some of them I am watching her pretending to be tortured. In some she is trying to ask me questions about why I am there, but I am unable to speak. The man does everything from cutting off limbs to rape and no I'm not going to specify to whom. There seems to be around 50 to 100 Fa's in total. After so many it is impossible to keep track of them all.

      I eventually wind up in a school field during a festival of some sort. I find L there and ask her if she remembers anything about being held captive by the man. She told me not to worry about it, nothing happened. I protest and say that I saw her being tortured how can she deny that and not even appear shaken up or angry. She doesn't say anything but looks at me like I'm completely insane. At the end I figure she must be a co conspirator.


      I'm watching TV with asuka, about a space traveling arrogant hero archetype dude. In the early episodes he has a giant ship that crashes into an ice mountain every time it tries to take off. In later episodes he gets a more smaller ship that is easier to navigate.

      Another movie

      Dream of watching a comedy movie with Asuka. It's a war comedy with 90's Jim Carrey, and other comedy actors. It reminds me of Tropic Thunder but more slapstick.
    7. Low recall.

      by , 06-08-2017 at 03:35 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)
      Tying to adjust to the overnight work schedule.


      This dream seemed to be a slight replay of my overnight shift. I'm at the backdoor crushing boxes and taking out garbage. I go into the restaurant but everything looks weird. there's weird solar panels all over the place.


      Asuka is shaking me awake in a false awakening. Data is emitting a high pitched sound standing at a window. Asuka said there is someone outside. I ask if it's Bjork? She says no. I tell data to shut up. He says he's testing out a new alarm system that detects strangers, if someone comes close by he opens his mouth and emits an annoying sound. I tell him to maybe make it less annoying. Can't remember the rest.
    8. Whole lotta WTF.

      by , 06-03-2017 at 03:54 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)
      Getting my sleeping schedule back to normal... Which will be adjusted again when I start nights next week.


      Kind of a divergent dream. I'm standing in a kitchen or on top of a wooden landing. In both versions a woman is pointing to a ladder which I go to climb down. In the kitchen version it's Asuka who is making herself look like bjork because she knows I like her looks, and there is also a trap door in the floor where the ladder is. In the wooden landing version it's bjork, but her smile is a little less sincere, a smile that is only trying to conceal something else. It's almost as if she's telling me to leave almost the way you tell a drunken customer that he's not only overstayed his welcome and is on the verge of causing an embarrassing scene - that he has already almost crossed the line. But what that line is: I'm not sure... I don't have much to go on as usual, no context, just half remembered dreams and tail ends of conversations that don't say as much and are as ambiguous as ever. She is also smiling in a way that says," come back tomorrow or another day when you are more yourself and we can conduct our business as usual." But what that business is exactly is a mystery wrapped inside and enigma and buried in so deep in Pandora's box that I could spend a lifetime, no... an ETERNITY trying to solve without more information or proper information...

      I think what asuka is doing is kind of replaying the scene and trying it make it a more happy moment. I guess that's a better thing for Asuka to do, instead of giving bjork a series of nightmares.

      Creepy Hospital

      Well, I've worn myself out typing that last dream so I will type the rest with less detail. In this dream I am outside a hospital that is a top secret military science gone wrong hospital. No outsider is allowed in and I'm with a bunch of protestors outside the fence clamoring to be let in. Me and another passerby have a small conversation about it at some point. we both agree that we saw a large skin sample being carried by a window that was made up of pig and human. At one point a giant black baby with acidic skin crawls out of the window and burns the grass. People in hazmat suits with flamethrowers burn it to a crisp. Disturbing.

      I get bored of this somehow and check my phone. I'm on a bjork app where she is about to have a live chat with her fans on the app. I immediately want to ask her about my dreams. Does she think I'm mad for having them? Does she still pay attention to dreams? Does she remember me in her dreams? etc etc. But I decide not to, because I remember she already has a history of stalkers. The last thing I wanna do is scare her with strange questions so I put my phone away.

      FA, I get out of a sleeping bag by the hospital. K from work walks by and says we better head to work soon. but instead I find a trapdoor that leads me to a basement where Alex Jones is living and is doing a live broadcast on the hospital. He says I can watch TV on one of his monitors. I begin watching one but he changes the channel and I give his shit for changing it because the show was getting good dammit. He just shrugs and continues his broadcast.

      Dark Tower Craft

      Third person perspective dream of me watching. Roland from The Dark Tower and his Ka tet consisting of Jake, Eddie and Susannah are in a land rover driving by a mountain. Oy is running behind the vehicle. At the base of the mountain right below a sand cliff. They run into a Zergling Hatchery and get pulled under ground by a tentacle. I'm supposed to save them so I send a bunch of dragoons to destroy the Hatchery. they start getting killed from Sunken colony tendrils. I look and can't see any sunken colonies, but I spot that the earth is different in a line directly behing the Hatchery. so I shoot a gun at the line and kill all of the sunken colonies. I am about to spawn more dragoons when the dream ends.
    9. Series of rock dreams

      by , 06-02-2017 at 07:36 PM
      I thought I was in Europe...Italy. I was in a house during a party eating good healthy organic food. Then we were all in my house eating food in my dad's refrigerator (this was a false wake up). Then I saw a purse that wasn't mine in my room. Then I was in a different house and a guy tried to rape me and I defended myself. I kicked him and grabbed his feet and pulled him down. Then I smoked weed with a peaceful guy. He showed me how to take a hit without burning my thumb.

      I really thought this was real, more than usual. The guy tried to rape me again and this time I let him, and later thought he had HIV. Later at night I saw huge rocks in my house. I don't remember but one was silvery and purple and translucent. There were some medium sized ones and some small ones. Demons made me put a lot of them in my mouth. I took them out of my mouth but swallowed a few. Again, I thought it was real and God was taking the rocks back.

      In another version of my series of rock dreams I was in a store and saw a huge purple amethyst. I wanted it but it cost about 2,000 dollars. If I'm right, it represents 2,000 years, that I am older than 2,000 years and that years = money.

      Dreaming about special rocks = being a precious gem of God. That I will find my gifts from God. Also smoking weed in a dream after a long time of not doing it in real life for a long time was very reassuring. I know once I smoked DMT with a girl in a dream.

      There were other dreams of rocks. The main difference was the rocks were different. Different sizes and colors. I wanted to keep them but I woke up and they were gone.

      Updated 06-02-2017 at 07:56 PM by 93335 (remembered more)

      non-lucid , false awakening , memorable , dream fragment
    10. Semi lucidity.

      by , 05-30-2017 at 03:42 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)
      Why is everyone so negative in my dreams?


      Frag of me sitting at a kitchen table. Two people walk in and not sure who they are. They start giving me shit for something and some random girl E from work is there. She starts joining in so I start cussing her out. she doesn't even belong in my house. she tells me to shut up. so I keep telling her off. She turns into a blur and hits me out of the dream.

      Work confusion

      I'm working with co workers from McDonald's but instead we are working at a dollar store in the middle of a mall. J tells me to hang up some beads in small packets on a big display. I start doing so but A and E walk by me. A says hi and starts complaining about my work. I ask her why she's even talking to me. She said she was just saying Hi. I couldn't beleive she was being rude about it. I wanted to complain about it to J in an open door policy discussion.

      I leave and wind up roaming the dark mall for a while. I eventually found J in a meeting room. I sat through the meeting. I asked him to have a conversation but there were too many people around.

      Dangerous plane

      I'm flying inside an air plane with Data. there's literally no bottom to the plane. We float over to a seat strapped into a wall. He straps me in and hands me an oxygen tank. I keep breathing through it and turn a crank that shuts it off. I ask him if I did the right thing. He says yes. I then wait for the plane ride to end. I am really worried about crashing because there is no floor to the plane and I can see the land going by below.


      I have a FA in the bottom big bedroom downstairs. Pope john Paul is there and wants to talk to me. I have to leave for some reason. I look out the window and see snow is outside. It makes me lucid. I float through the window and walk on the snow with no socks. My feet don't even feel cold. I climb the fence without any effort.

      I lose lucidity while walking down the street. I enter a building where my boss is. and he says why Haven't I talked about the plan yet with his messenger. The current pope is with him and they are looking at me. I go to leave but wake up.
    11. Dream from a church retreat: turning point

      by , 05-28-2017 at 11:25 PM
      I fell asleep in the woman's cabin. Then I was on a windy path with tall grass around it.
      I was walking up it, holding a paper bag with books and clothes in it. (Primarily clothes). I noticed a little girl behind me aways away and I thought she was a demon. I knew at the top of the hill my friends were there. I didn't want to let go of the paper bag, but I decided I had to. I put it down and raced towards the people at the top/the end of the path. End of dream. That day, my pastor and I walked up a hill on the retreat, and I told him about the dream. He suggested that the little girl was the girl I used to be, and later in my life I realized that the people at the top were the future me and other friends I would have. The dream taught me that sometimes we have to let go of material things and let spiritual things and friendships matter more.

      Another dream I had earlier was I was at Julliard and I asked if I was a student there. Then suddenly I was in a grassy field and at heaven school, and they told me their music and dance school was better than Julliard, and I felt peaceful.

      A recurring dream I always have is being at university of Pittsburgh (which I attended in real life), not having my schedule, trying to get to the computer lab to print it out. The last time I had this dream I actually was able to print out my schedule, and then I was in a big classroom and they were teaching Islam on the screen, and I realized that maybe it was a dream. Later I decided it was definitely a dream (first lucid dream in at least two years), and I left the classroom and made the building disappear, through Jesus. Then I was walking in a grassy field knowing I was dreaming starting to explore. Someone started to chase me, I think he or she was muslim. Then I woke up or had a false wake up.

      A psychic dream I had was I was with my family in the middle of the ocean and Simon-Peter, my brother, was there and he was in a box that went down to the bottom of the Sea to explore it. Then I woke up.

      A long time ago, I dreamt I met a girl and we watched an art movie together and then painted together. Was a beautiful but not lucid dream.

      There are so many more that I forgot. I will try to remember them to post them here from now on.

    12. May 21st 2017 to May 27th 2017

      by , 05-28-2017 at 04:33 PM
      I went lucid twice last week! I've realized once I do go lucid that my dreams are very foggy, almost like I'm looking at them through a bubble. Also the control of them isn't 100% there yet.

      Most of my dreams involved being back in PA, and also mixed with my work. Also some taboo items came into play.


      Did lucid dream, but did have a false wake up. Was really concentrated on being lucid the day before. I was driving near the woods of the area where I grew up. Did go lucid at this point. Realize that I was dreaming. When I do realize that I’m dreaming my dream world is kind of fuzzy and blurred. Saw a friend from high school in the woods and asked her for oral sex. We did do it. Then had a false wake up in a cabin. There was a video on of the sexual part of my last dream. I was sleeping on a bunk bed and my dad was there.

      Another dream I had took place at night. Waiting in the parking lot of a doctor’s office. The ops support manager of my work was there smoking (she doesn’t smoke) and went into the doctor’s office when it opened. Then I was at work and I was saying hi to some of the guys I work with on the way to the staff cafe. I saw a temp on the way. We said hi and he hugged me and lift me up. I joked with him, asking if he would take me all the way to the cafeteria. Then my boss came out, and said that it could be a worker’s comp issue because he could hurt himself picking me up. I felt offended, although she didn’t say that to offend me.


      Dreams were all over the place, although I did lucid dream. Did my reality check just like I would in real life. I was in a hotel (maybe for work) and I was in an elevator. The elevator did not stop at my floor and kept going up. At that point I realized I was dreaming and actually floated for a little. Characters from the show Archer were in my dream. Archer was actually married to Cheryl.


      Dreams were very foggy. One I do remember is that was back in college. It was graduation day. There were some older people there (kind of like The Golden Girls). Me and an older lady were kind of connected. Remember dragging along a really big suitcase, then going to a reception area with food. Then the next dream was almost like a nightmare. I was in my old house and it could have been haunted.


      Was back in PA and it was night (close to CHristmas time). I was crawling on the roofs of house for some unknown reason. I decided I wanted to crawl onto my grandma’s roof, but it was too steep and had too many high steps to get up to it. My cousin Kaitlyn showed up, and she offered to climb up it. Kaitlyn said she was afraid she might fall, and I said I would break her fall/catch her since I am bigger than her. She did fall, and I did not break her fall. She landed on her back with her right arm behind her. I asked how she felt. She said she felt alright, but felt like her thumb tore off. She brought her right hand forward, and her thumb was almost completely tore off, only being held by a sliver of skin. There was a lot of blood and she looked like she would pass out. I called 911, and we waited. After a while she said she was feeling better. She got up and started walking around.She tries to gross me out, wagging her hand in front of me. At one point I did look and was able to see a small part of her bone. Ended up on the porch of my grandma’s house. The medic arrived, and it was Iwan Rheon. Took care of her thumb and did not go to the hospital.

      The second part of the dream took place at my grandma’s house. It was my place of work, and there was a mentally challenged middle aged black woman there with crazy hair. She was messing around on my colleague’s desk, and my colleague said “Why don’t you go and mess around Amanda’s desk for a while?” The lady started messing up my desk, and I got really angry at her. Then the setting changed to my actual work place, and it was raining and we were all talking about going somewhere to eat. For some reason we were going to drive a school bus there. My mom was also there as well.
    13. Short lucids.

      by , 05-27-2017 at 04:04 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)
      I hate working hard to have lucids only to be lucid for 2 seconds long!


      Me and Raven remove a Dark energy Symbiont from Bjork. We heal her with music. She apologizes to me and promises to keep the dreams with me a little less. There is forgiveness on both sides. Yay!

      Dog walking

      I was walking my dog in a weird landscape. Some guy emerges from a cave/underpass and warns me not to walk ahead because it's too difficult to travel through. I walk down into where he said, It's a weird pit that looks scary but I find a neat set of stairs up. I go up them and find a bunch of underground walkways to explore. Me and my dog walk through it until the dream ends.

      After work

      I'm in the office at work but it's like 3 times as big. I'm leafing through files then R an J walk in. they don't seem to care that I'm in their office. I go outside and find a seat to sit down on. Xereniak is there and we talk, but I forget about what. R walks out she smiles at me and says, "Okay crew get to work on blah blah blah" Sounded like difficult work. Xereniak leaves and I wonder why I am sitting there and not working. I realize my shift must have ended.


      Asuka brings me upstairs and gives me martial arts gloves for some reason. They look very sporty. I put them on and she leaves. I begin practicing the opening moves to a kung fu form. It feels weird in the gloves. I practice for a while until the dream ends.

      She's Stalking me

      Data convinces me to hover outside my one window. He says He's going to tell Asuka I just had a false awakening in that room. When she comes in I'm supposed to jump in through the window and surprise/scare her. sounds like fun.

      I wait... someone is flying nearby. I look and see Bjork hovering a distance away. My dream awareness isn't that great and just thinks, "pretty lady I know and like... CHASE!" So I fly after her. she looks guilty and zips through a portal like she wasn't supposed to be spotted. I fly after her but she is gone. I'm by a house A man is outside who I recognize as her boyfriend. I ask where she went. He said she just left and he looked sad. While I ponder if he meant she just left his house, or she left him? I wake up.

      After WBTB.

      Forgotten lucid

      Became lucid somewhere but forgot what happened after.

      Black Jesus

      I'm in a house with a bunch of people. Jesus is there but he's black and has short black hair, he's also wearing a suit. I find it odd he would look like that. I become lucid and go over to touch him. I do and he looks surprised. I can feel insurmountable energy inside him that feels foreign. It intensifies and knocks me out of the dream.

      Fa, I'm in bed with that spider thing again minus Bjork and the dark energy. It doesn't seem to be doing much harm. I'm wondering why it's still around.

      Dark Tower

      Me and Asuka are watching an early version of The Dark Tower starring Idris elba. She says, "Look there he is," and The Gunslinger is crouching in the desert sneaking up on someone.

      Updated 05-27-2017 at 04:08 AM by 6012

      non-lucid , false awakening , memorable , dream fragment , lucid
    14. A burst of lucidity

      by , 05-23-2017 at 09:41 PM (Cinder's Dreams Gallery)
      I can't remember much, but I had some false awakenings which made me become lucid, but it caused me to transition through layers of false awakenings and occasionally actually waking up and going back to sleep. In one FA, I knew I was dreaming and got up from my bed, but my dad was also theree and he asked why I'm moving around weirdly. I checked my hand and saw that I had five fingers. If only I remembered me and my dad are in different continents...
      lucid , false awakening
    15. Successful Sled Ride! (FA-WILD + FA)

      by , 05-22-2017 at 04:43 PM
      Ritual: The new Twin Peaks started last night, so I watched the usual Sunday shows in their second round and didn't get to bed until after 2am. I woke around 7 or 8 and looked at my iPad a bit, enough to wake up my mind, with the usual vague intention to make this into a WBTB, but the only other mental preparation I did was to remind myself that dreaming involves proprioreception, so I should pay attention to my whole body as I fell back asleep. It was 9am when I woke after the dream, which I felt had lasted only a few minutes.

      FA-WILD: During my WBTB, my husband mentioned that he was going to the grocery store this morning, so when I was half-woken by the sound of the garage door, I knew he must have left. This much was evidently a real perception, but right after that, still believing I was half awake, I heard voices. I knew my brother was in his room on the other side of the house, but I couldn't account for the other voices. [DL: My brother lives on the other side of the country, and the room I thought he was in does not exist.] Was he on the phone? But there were several voices, and the sounds of people moving around. Had he invited friends over? Then I recognized one of the voices as that of my maternal grandmother. [DL: She died over twenty years ago.]

      Despite the dreamlogic, these observations did actually make me wonder if I was dreaming the voices, not because of the incongruities that would have been obvious to a waking mind, but only because of my conviction that if my husband just left for the store, then no one else (besides my brother) should be in the house so early in the morning. I tested to see if I was getting any dream imagery, and sure enough, when I partially closed my eyes, the four flaps of a manually closed cardboard box appeared superimposed over the rumpled covers of the bed that I had thought I was seeing with my waking eyes. [DL: In retrospect, is it apparent that everything I observed after hearing the garage door was already in dream, so I was mistaken in believing that I had woken up. My mind was half awake, despite the dream logic, which is what led to the confusion about which perceptions were dreamed and which were real.]

      I realized that if I was already seeing dream imagery, then if I was careful I could probably "get up" out of bed and into the dream just like I do in WILDs. This was easily done. I crossed the room, an accurate likeness of my bedroom, and opened the window to look outside toward what I understood to be my brother's room, on the second floor above the attached shed. [DL: The shed has no second storey.] The ground was covered with snow, and I did recognize that this was incongruous with the current season. It gave me the idea to do the TOTY that I had attempted a couple times earlier, the sled ride.

      The last shot of the final show I watched last night was a woman diving backwards over the edge of a boat to go scuba diving. It made an impression on me because I had only ever dived into water face first, and at the time I had tried to imagine what it would feel like to enter the water that way. Now, as I was about to jump out the window, I decided to do it backwards like a scuba diver. For a moment I felt like I was falling and wondered if I would actually hit the ground, but then the nongravity of dream caught me pleasantly in an inverted arc, and I settled gently to my feet.

      I remembered the last few times I had attempted the sled task, and how I had overcomplicated it to the point where I kept waking up before I could finish. This time I decided I'd better just get it done, even if my solutions weren't elegant. So instead of going to the trouble of finding or manifesting the necessary sled and mountaintop, I just asserted these conditions into existence. I'm on a sled, riding down a mountain. As is typical when I "brute force" things in dream, initially it felt like a fiction, but soon I began to feel plausible sensations of sitting on a sled and sliding down the snowy slope. It was far from my best work, but it sufficed.

      I was sufficiently familiar with the task that before I had even intended it, my sled slipped through an irregular opening like the mouth of a cave, into a wide dark space. But then I wondered if this was good enough—I hadn't read the terms of the task in ages. Would a cave suffice, or did it have to be a proper hole through the surface of the earth? I couldn't remember, so I decided to play it safe and conjured a perfectly round hole, like the sort of thing you might see in a cartoon, just in front of me on the lower floor of the cave. My sled and I slipped right through, and at this point my interest perked up, because I didn't know what to expect, and had not planned or intended anything past this point.

      It was dark down here, and I had no sense of the borders of the space, yet I could see the details nearest me perfectly well in the nonlight of dream. The place felt public and even familiar—familiar as a type rather than a specific location—but I can't think of how to relate it to anything in WL. A "town square" might be the closest analogue, but of course in WL town squares don't tend to be in enormous caverns underground.

      I felt my mind shift over into observation mode and began to take deliberate note of the things I saw, but at the same time I felt really hungry and couldn't resist impulsively tasting everything. [WL: I hadn't eaten much for dinner and had even felt hungry again by the time I went to bed, so this was a genuine bleedthrough sensation.]

      My sled had disappeared in the transition through the hole, so now I was on foot. The first object that I passed, on my left, was a piece of fabric that had been fashioned into the form of an elephant, about about eighteen inches wide. It was attached to the top of a pole stuck in the ground, elevating it to just above waist height. I pulled the fabric elephant off the pole to give it a closer look as I continued to walk. White was the dominant color, but the details were stitched in brightly-hued threads, red and blue and green. The base fabric had a thick pile, almost fur-like, akin to what you might see on a stuffed animal, but the object overall was flat, lightly padded like a thin quilt. My hunger impelled me to take a big bite, and in my mouth it had the taste and texture of a sort of bland taffy. (Tastes are rarely very distinctive in my dreams.) I dropped it and moved on.

      The next object I encountered was also on a waist-high pole, and about the same size as the elephant. This one was made of paper and a bit more three-dimensional—it resembled a large origami fish folded from patterned paper. The taste and texture were even less remarkable, but I was so hungry it felt good to be chewing something.

      As I observed with mild amusement the way my hunger was driving me to try to eat things that didn't even resemble food, the rational part of my mind responded that this being a dream, there was no reason I shouldn't try to eat literally anything I could see. I put this to the test, breaking off random bits of any surface I came across and nibbling on them. One thing I remember distinctly was a table. It was a round table covered by a long, dark-hued tablecloth. I think there was a vase of flowers in the center but otherwise it was bare, so I grabbed a hank of the tablecloth and started noshing on that. I was cramming far more in my mouth than I ever would in WL, but I didn't worry since I knew that this stuff had no real substance.

      I was still in snacking mode when I came across a white-bearded gentleman in a navy blue blazer. The bronze buttons caught my eye, and without so much as saying hello, much less asking permission, I reached out and twisted off the top button, bringing it to my eyes for a closer look. Tiny convex letters around the top spelled out "Bartholomew," and a small human figure occupied the center of the button. "Saint Bartholomew?" I asked the gentleman from whom I had taken the button, while to remember if there was really such a saint or if I was just free associating. [WL: I still wasn't sure so I googled it. Apparently Saint Bartholomew was an apostle, and although I was not consciously aware of that, I suspect the influence of day residue, because in The Leftovers last night several disciples were mentioned, and I've never been able to keep disciples and apostles straight.] The man shook his head, and when I looked again at the button I saw the letters rearrange themselves into the name "Balthus," which seemed to make a bit more sense... in a way that I can't entirely explain. Still hungry, I licked the button. I thought it tasted a bit sour and metallic, a bit like licking a D battery but without the tingle. The bronze button had been darkly tarnished but now gleamed where I had licked it, so I licked it a few more times to polish the highlights. I looked at the letters again and now they read "Ubewiz," a name meant nothing to me, though I thought it sounded vaguely Polish. [DL: I just noticed the symmetry between the verb "polish" and the adjective "Polish," so I suspect dreamlogic lay behind this observation.]

      FA: I woke up (so I thought) and immediately fished my dream journal out of the bottom drawer of my bedside table. [WL: This was a realistic detail, because although usually I keep it right on the table next to the bed, for the past few days it has been in the drawer.] I flipped through it and couldn't find a single blank page, but I didn't want to waste any time so I started writing my notes in the margins. I was jotting down keywords: "Bartholomew, Balthus, Ubewiz," read the first line. Then I included brief notes about the fabric elephant and origami fish. I hadn't gotten very far when I woke up again and realized that I had been taking my initial notes in a false awakening and would have to start over, so once again I pulled my journal out of the drawer and wrote—grateful for the blank page this time—"Bartholomew, Balthus, Ubewiz."
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