The Labrynth of the Mind

I have been experimenting with peanut butter, of all things. In previous night I was taking vitamin b-6 as well, but last night I decided to just try two tablespoons of peanut butter before bed. I may not get a chance to journal for a long time today, so here are some quick notes.

Successful WILD?

I was attempting a WILD here. Realizing how fast I slip into a dream after the first hints of HI, I decided to forgo counting, relaxation techniques, or mind alertness methods and focus on myself in a dream. At some point (I don't remember exactly when, it may or may not have even been part of this but for some reason I thought it was) I wake up. Or I think I wake up anyway. I look at my hand as a RC. I have 6 fingers. A classic RC.I realize that I'm dreaming. I sit up in bed, and things look completely normal except that I know it's a dream. I throw off my blankets, but I can't remember anything else.

A series of false awakenings, and some lucidity

I have some long involved dream with gangsters. There are fish in the back of a car, and I make it seem like they have been dead a long time. Kind of weird, but it seemed vitally important at the time. After a while, the adventure takes us to an old building with stone steps. I know that if one of the bottom steps is removed, another set of steps will show up leading down into a passage in the ground.

Somehow I find myself back in bed. The gangsters are in my bedroom. I don't know if I thought I woke up or not. The light is on, and think I had better turn it out. I turn it off, but one gangster tells me I had better turn it back on again. I try, but it won't come on. I think it must be because I turned it off and on so fast, and the bulb is burnt out. I try the switch on the wall. Nothing.

"Must have blown a fuse," I think. But I also remember that lights not working right is a dreamsign. I plug my nose and try to breathe. At first I am confused, because I actually can still breathe but I could swear I was awake. I pinch my nose harder, but I can still breathe. I realize I am dreaming. I walk out into the livingroom, and look around. Things are fading a bit, but I hang onto some things to try and stabilize it. I keep saying "increase stability" over and over. I hang onto an open door, which helps a bit. But when I let go, the dream almost ends. I become dangerously aware of my body asleep in bed. Trying to forget that, I try a technique of slowly spinning and looking at all of my surroundings. This helps somewhat.

The dream is still threatening to break up. I pace up and down the living room, shouting "increase vividness" and "increase lucidity" over and over. I walk into the kitchen, and think maybe some excitement would help. "Create monsters!" I shout, but then think better of it and say "well, maybe no monsters." I walk into the living room, and try to summon someone but it fails.

I find myself in bed. I get up and walk out into the living room, remembering my dream. Things are decorated for Christmas, which they are in real life but not as much. I look at the computer clock, but interestingly it seems normal.Somehow though I realize this is a dream. I can't quite remember what I did in this dream (I'm losing recall the longer I am awake) but it wasn't much anyway.

I find myself awake in bed. I get up and walk into the living room. My mother is sitting there, and I tell her about my dreams and false awakenings.

"I just kept thinking I was awake!" I say. I make a joke about an alarm clock, and how it would be good if I had one set in case this was a dream also. How would I ever know when to wake up for real if I thought I was awake already? I don't seem to doubt that I am actually awake this time.

I realize I need to get ready for school. I have to leave by 6:00 or 7:00, but I can't remember exactly when I have to be there. I thought for sure I didn't even need to get up until 8:00, but my mother thinks differently.

I wake up again. There is a single mother in my room. For some reason, I don't know anything about this woman but I know that she is a single mother. She is also a pillow. It's kind of weird. I don't even know if I'm lucid or not at this point, things are a bit confusing.

Eventually I wake up again. Unless this is also a false awakening, which RC's tell me isn't the case, I actually do need to leave. Needless to say, I woke up again from that last false awakening, and no reality check has failed so far.