JonBingus

I was living in a big house. A giant one, full of teenagers. I was probably 16-17 again, and there were guys and girls everywhere. The place was run on a schedule like a summer camp but I wasn't really participating. The laws of this world were also governed more like a videogame. People had menus for their items, they had costumes and add ons, things you could get to float around you, etc... Some people were just a dinosaur or something like that, indicating high level I guess as a transformation like that was hard to come by. At one point I was talking to my buddy about golf on this big round patio next to the street, and I said to begin the process for a good old game. After that I noticed that chris, his asian friend, and Dylan Janes were scheming across the road on an identical patio. I went over and found out they wanted to steal some content and re sell it in a whole new console or something like that. While they were plotting this, a guy across the street (we were on a balcony) was like "Aye! The plan is in full forward!" He meant the golf game.

The game was not me and my buddies but myself and a gentleman in his 50s. We were trying to play but every time I swung the club bent because it was an incredibly shitty metal. Eventually we called the game off and I went to see Chris about his plan. In the plaza where those balconies were everyone was hanging out and music was playing. Right when the beat dropped I leaped in the air and glided over to the guys, just to look cool. At one point I started lucidly controlling the glide and was partially aware I must be dreaming but never took interest in reality checking. Dylan and the Asian were on on the balcony, and Chris suddenly showed up and handed a virtual box of items to the Asian kid. He had that Chris scheming look on his face, and Dylan started ranting about the money they would make.

I wanted to try this theft thing, but first I went to explore. I went to the guy's locker room and opened my items, seeing that I had basically nothing. I went out and around a corner and found a room with a fortune telling NPC. It was premium content and a list of real dollar costs came up in front of him as I approached. I walked out saying fuck that! I went past the guys changerooms and saw the entrance to the girls changerooms. A bunch of boys had tried sneaking in and were caught, so the girls had put tiny auto sentry turrents on the doors and had girls standing guard. The guys who did it came by and all the girls chased after them. I was determined to break in there, because I knew I was more skilled than those guys and this was the first challenge I'd seen. About 15 feet in front of the doors was a hole in the floor that had a little crawlspace in it. The crawlspace continued away from the doors under the floor for about 10 feet and opened up wider in the back part. I crawled in there, and then adjusted my position so I could see a tiny sliver of the doors but my body would be hidden. Some girls would look down there and I would ignore them, and then one chick said "I know what you're doing you asshole!" I replied "Yeah, trying to catch a fucking nap in here!" She blushed and went away. Eventually everyone was gone, probably for lunch. I take my tiny little low power laser and use it to blow up the little sentry turrets on the doors, and then a girl walks in slowly and enters. I float out of the hole and silently pursue her, and she goes right to the lockers. I try to open her inventory but she has nothing. When she opens her locker I open her inventory again, and I can see EVERYTHING in there. Hundreds of items, from regular clothing to full battle armor are in there, but I have no time to read them, I just start taking every single thing. There's obviously no weight limit so I just hold down the steal button and take the whole list, then silently creep out. I book it around the corner, past the fortune teller and into an empty room that has a hallway leading further away. I hide in a corner, and some high level people dressed as dwarves and T rexes are walking past me through the hallway. I open my inventory and accidentally equip everything. Holiday items, costumes, Armors, cloaks, huge graphic effects like floating moons and illuminati symbols fill the air and tiny little fireworks go off. I start taking it all off, but leave on two extremely high level charms that have floating hands on either side protecting me, and a cloak. I can't wear a disguise as the person who had the items will recognize them.

I get into the hall and see that in the local chat that person just said "I was just sneak thieved of 32m lol". Holy shit I just stole 32 million coins of items. Better return it all. I see the girl, who by the way is obviously being played by Ricky Gervais, and I throw my wallet on the ground. This removes all my items. Theres a big fuss about the stolen stuff, and everyone blames everyone else while secretly wishing they did it, this was clearly one of the most epic loots in history.

Eventually they figured out it was me, and ganged up on me. I ran for my wallet and like 20 people tried to take it from me. I started booming "Let me go or I will smite you." To the person who had a grip on the wallet and they quickly backed off. I admitted to stealing it all, them smirked and walked to Ricky Gervais and returned all the items in one click. I told him I had planned on returning it all, and I was going to do it by picking the fortune teller up and moving him into Rickys room. This would cause a massive panic because a core NPC would be missing, Ricky would go home to find it in his place and in its item storage would be all the stolen goods. But my plan was foiled.

After a good laugh I woke up.

Dream Signs
Girls
Flying
Chris
Stealing
Golf