Morning of October 3, 2018. Wednesday. Dream #: 18,916-01. Reading time (optimized): 2 min. Readability score: 71. My dream self is non-lucidly in my den in the Stadcor Street house in Brisbane, where we have not lived for years (since our two oldest were young children). There is clutter of which I am sorting. I pick up several winter sweaters from atop other items on the floor and hang them on a hook on the door. A few are like ones I have had in real life, including a gray one. I also pick up pieces of technology, such as a sound card. The west wall has a narrow gap under it. I notice that a big dragonfly is headfirst about halfway under it. It seems to be dead. I decide to show it to my youngest son. (My dream self has no recall that he never lived at this address.) When I turn around, the bedroom where Zsuzsanna and our youngest son is is the same room I had just been in, though my dream self does not notice this error. The head of the bed is against the west wall. Zsuzsanna is sitting up in bed. Our youngest son is standing on the opposite side of the room. I feel intense vibrations in my fingers as the dragonfly is alive and moving its wings. I go to the back door, incorrectly rendered as facing east into the yard rather than south onto the porch, and let it go. It still has trouble flying, so stays near the door. Looking out the window of the back door after closing the door, I see an American robin (juvenile based on its coloring) hopping out to the center of the backyard. It seems that the bird probably ate the dragonfly, though I did not see this occur. I awake around this time. Use of a door or doorway serves as one of two potentials, either triggering the waking process (as here) or triggering lucidity and vivification. A door is a transition from one mode of consciousness to another, in real time. Birds have been a common point of focus in the last moments of my dreams since early childhood. It is an emerging consciousness factor as an association with the dream self’s fictitious body (not viably understanding where one’s real physical body is, associating the essence of sleeping and dreaming with flight). The dragonfly was a potential for lucidity but did not serve as such. This type of focus, which has occurred in many dreams, is from subliminal awareness of my hands when my dream self’s attention focuses on picking up or moving something. No preconscious avatar is present. That is most often because of the presence of a dream state indicator, in this case, the bedroom and bed, a feature of at least one dream per sleep cycle since earliest memory and which serves as a precursory liminal awareness of being asleep, thus the preconscious is often not needed in RAS mediation of this type. (That depends on my dream self’s mode and progress of transition from the dream state.)
Morning of April 24, 2018. Tuesday. In my dream, my family and I, mostly as we appear now (except for our youngest son’s beard), are living in an unusual expanded distortion of the King Street mansion (where I have not lived in real life for nearly thirty years). It is most like the second-floor room of the middle of the east side, though the room seems to take up the whole section in my dream, additionally replacing at least the northeast room. There is also another section that is oriented north, forming an inverted corner, implying that the building is either L-shaped or cross-shaped. In two vivid scenes, it seems I am on the first floor of this building. I look diagonally across to the perpendicular section, at a second-floor window, where a strange dark cloud seems to be blown out from inside, which also seemingly contains at least a few particulates. I get the impression that it is an older woman who lives there who is emptying her vacuum cleaner by spewing the contents out into the air. I consider that this is not a very considerate act but I never see the person and I do not become angry. In another scene, there are at least three people yelling at each other across the street, but I never see them or clearly discern what they are saying. The main part of my dream concerns our youngest son. I see that he now has a very bushy thick beard which unrealistically curls upward. Despite how strange this seems, my dream self does not perceive it as a dream state indicator. I worry about him. Although he otherwise looks like our youngest son (other than the beard), he acts very differently. I tell him I will trim it down or shave it off but he does not want me to. Oddly, I mention how his beard is even thicker than our second-youngest son’s beard (who of course does not have a beard either, but this is yet another nonsensical error in my dream self’s thinking.) Eventually, Zsuzsanna convinces him that it will be good to at least trim it down. When I see him later, I observe that it is shaved on one side but only closely trimmed on the other. There is an additional scene that is the typical RAS modulation, where the preconscious, as an unknown businessman, points a box saw at my chest (the blade downward, only the front end touching me), but I am not concerned. He had been part of a group of people watching us through a window, which is modeled after my childhood room in Cubitis, though seemingly on a fictional second floor and from the south. (The settings in my dreams typically change ambiguously, never being rendered the same way twice in over fifty years and tens of thousands of closely studied dreams.) This is a non-lucid carryover from the lucid dream of yesterday, where I willed a different form of the preconscious to split in half (though I then “healed” it by willing the two body halves back together). Maybe someday people will understand that my dream’s content, when it is not prescient (or with the inexplicable “sent” factor) or dominated by RAS modulation, is mainly based on my focus and knowledge of the dream state itself (how could it not be) rather than waking life, but there seems to be a “wall” in the minds of most people that prevents them from understanding what a dream actually is (inclusive of most people who have published books about dreams). As I have written many times in past entries, at least one dream per sleep cycle is somehow influenced by what Zsuzsanna had seen or talked about (or in some cases only thought about) at another location the day before with no way of me knowing. This was going on long before we met, long before I learned my “dream girl” was a real person. Society, not having any intelligence at all when it comes to understanding dreams or the dream state, instead writing mindless tomes about “interpretation” (which completely ignores the dynamics of what a dream actually is) has neither viable answers to this mechanism nor an iota of credibility in general. There have been people who have studied this phenomenon and written about it to some extent, but just as with the truth of dreams in their basic form inherently being autosymbolic (not symbolic in the popular sense), society remains without any understanding of dreams. In this case, Zsuzsanna had been with our youngest son yesterday and there was a conversation involving her brother George (here for a visit for the first time in months). They were at Zsuzsanna’s sister’s place and George was talking about a man with a very bushy beard. Often though, the correlating factors are more unusual.
Morning of October 13, 2017. Friday. My wife Zsuzsanna and our children are living in the Loomis Street house (with no recall on my part that she has never been to America and no recall of my relatives of whom lived in the house). Although our youngest son is the age he is now, our youngest daughter is a baby. We all seem to be going out as a family, though I am not sure if it includes a shopping trip or perhaps a movie. At one point, I begin to have concern about where our youngest daughter has gotten off to, though I consider that, as she is a baby, she would probably not have gone off on her own somewhere, at least very far. As I am sitting on the couch in the living room (facing north as it was in reality when I was last there) and our youngest son is to my left in an armchair and getting ready for us to go out, I see that our baby daughter is inside one of my shoes on the floor in front of me, though a bit to my left. I see her face looking out from the opening of my shoe. She is lying on her back looking out. I am puzzled about how she ended up inside my shoe like this. Perhaps she crawled into it and had fallen asleep for a time. I do not consider that her size is impossibly small. I am somewhat relieved that I now know where she is. I am concerned about her for a short time. She makes a couple faces, but also seems to be holding her breath at one point, her cheeks puffing out. My concern passes as she continues to make different faces, moving her mouth and eyes in unusual ways. She seems cheerful and amused. It always amazes me how vivid a dream can be and realistic in some ways yet totally absurd in others, and yet my non-lucid dream self does not question such impossible nonsense at all.
Morning of September 2, 2017. Saturday. Dream #: 18,520-03. Reading time (optimized): 2 min. My dream, which originated with the water induction process (melatonin mediation association), eventually clarifies as my dream self’s presence in a parking lot with no discernible lake. (However, the first fossil I find relates to the water lowering waking transition, a common form of waking symbolism since early childhood.) It is afternoon. I am waiting to get on a bus that is near a shopping mall. My wife Zsuzsanna and youngest son are present with a few unfamiliar people who have not boarded the bus yet. I am sitting about 20 feet from the shopping mall’s entrance. The bus is to my right. (Thus, my dream’s potential exit point is to my right.) I dig into the parking lot as if it was soil and find a fish skeleton fossilized in rock. I consider our youngest son would like it. I discover another “fossil” that is possibly a child’s craft project made of plaster of Paris. The impression seems to be from a plastic toy. As I talk about the second fossil not being real, I consider that the first one might not be genuine either. An unfamiliar girl standing nearby seems annoyed and walks off to board the bus. Meanwhile, I find a few other “fossils,” which are craft projects. One has an impression of a miniature baseball bat in it which I hold up as I comment. The pattern is about the length of my finger. I get up to board the bus. Zsuzsanna is on my left in a seat about halfway back on the left side of the aisle. Our children are also present. My mother is at the front of the bus on the left side, seated closest the aisle. (I do not recall she died in 2002.) My mother complains about stomach pain and seems in distress. She moves forward and down in her seat for a short time. I notice that other people near the front of the bus seem concerned. She may need to see a doctor. Two unknown people hold her, one on each side, and help her get off the bus. The bus driver exclaims, “Hey, get back here.” The other people are still near my mother as I look off to my left and see her sit down on a wooden bench. I notice there are other wooden benches in an equidistant pattern. They are seen lengthwise, parallel to the bus but facing away from it. Zsuzsanna had stomach pain recently. As the bus represents leaving my dream (the bus driver being the preconscious simulacrum and saying “Hey, get back here” as a subliminal correlation with Zsuzsanna’s physicality), I wish to have her pain left behind (despite my mother rendered as this factor). The bus has an Australian association as the driver is on the right (yet my mother had never been to Australia). The miniature baseball bat is associated with swinging my arms, gaining the physical energy to fully awake and get out of bed, a form of vestibular system correlation. See “- Causes of Dreams - Parking Lot - page 1 -” to understand this dream.
Updated 04-07-2019 at 11:38 AM by 1390
Morning of August 1, 2017. Tuesday. Dream #: 18,488-02. Reading Time (optimized): 2 min. I am with several people on an unusual little island at night. I walk around in a paved area. A small canal divides most of the island about one-quarter in from the side opposite of where I stand. There is at least one big brick building that blocks my view of the ocean on my right. Zsuzsanna and our youngest son are eventually with me. We go over to the canal. I notice that the ocean on the opposite side of the island, which I can now clearly see, has whitecaps (though I do not focus as much on the waves on my left side). An unknown girl talks about it publicly, relaying a concern that makes me consider if the waves could eventually cover the island. The island’s isolation contributes to this concern but not for long. I look into the depths of the canal and see a shadowy shape that I soon see is a shark of about four feet long. I tell Zsuzsanna and our son to watch, and we cheerfully look into the water. I soon notice other small sharks as well as a little dolphin, which is surprising, as they do not fight. They do not look real and make me think indirectly of CGI. We share amusement in watching these creatures in addition to several tiny fish. The more active area of the ocean remains off to my right, behind the big building, but some of it is still visible through the end of the canal and surrounding area. Zsuzsanna remains on my left, correlating with our sleeping positions. Additionally, this is one of many dreams that lack definition or attention to my left in contrast to a clear focus to my right, which is subliminal wakefulness anticipation (as I sleep on my left side, my right more exposed to my environment correlating in the dream state with its concurrent monitoring). For over 50 years, water has been a consistent factor of natural melatonin mediation and ultradian and circadian rhythm in correlation with my sleep cycle. The unknown girl is a subliminal reminder of the Naiad factor from high-level dream state induction, though here has transitioned to the RAS (reticular activating system) mediation stage. She is “warning” me about the high waves, a warning about not sleeping too long, the island being the dream state. I was aware that I was at least partly responsible for creating the ocean creatures, but with no dream state realization. The eradication of the unintelligent hype equating lucid dreaming with dream control is necessary to understand the processes and dynamics of awareness in all modes of dream space. The ambiguity of whether they should be sharks or dolphins (with both appearing without incident) reflects the dual nature of RAS mediation and simulacra transitions, from REM and non-REM sleep induction to consciousness reinitiation. Zsuzsanna had a dream with the same content in the same period, including the CGI association with ocean creatures. It happens regularly, with too much matching detail to be coincidental.
Updated 03-10-2019 at 07:35 AM by 1390
Morning of June 12, 2017. Monday. I am walking through an unknown city in a commercial area, where there are a number of small stores to my left as I walk. It seems to be late morning. I seem to be on my own at first. I have an interest in looking around in a store and turn to enter a store I think I recognize. When I walk in though, I see it is a clothing store. “Whoops, wrong store,” I say as I soon turn around to leave. Another (unfamiliar) man who had been walking behind me also enters the store and turns around to leave when I do. It is almost as if he had been having the same thought orientation as I had and was simply following me as if I was “leading”, apparently also looking for whatever I am (even though we had not spoken and I am not even sure where I am going). I continue to walk, but only a short distance and into another store that has a different type of entrance as the previous. There is a large long checkout counter on my right and an interior wall to my left so that it seems almost like walking through a narrow hall. I continue towards the back and see that it is a large bookstore. I see a magazine that I find interest in after first noticing what I take to be an Omni magazine. When I pick it up and look through it, I see that it is a science-fiction comic book (in color) about dinosaurs and a group of men. I decide that I will buy it. I look in my wallet and I am somewhat surprised to find at least two one-hundred-dollar bills, a few fifty-dollar bills, and more. I illogically reason that my mother (who died in real life in 2002) had placed the money in my wallet. I have no memory that she had died even though I assume I am my present age. I then see another magazine I want. I look through it and find it interesting. It also has at least one story relating to dinosaurs but is seemingly for older readers as well as being thicker. It is supposed to come with a CD, but I decide I will ask at the checkout if they have it. Our youngest son appears to my right as I decide to buy one more thing. I see a few groups of Casper comic books to my left. There are about four different covers (different issues) in the groups. I ask my son if he wants one and he says yes and points to one in another area to the right, but I already have one I find interesting and inform him that it is also larger. It is a fifty-two pages “giant” edition. He seems happy. I go to the checkout and there is an unfamiliar cashier who is a female of perhaps fifty. She has gray hair. I remember to ask about the CD. However, when I look at the magazine, which is wrapped in (transparent) plastic, I see the CD is already there. I tell her that I had thought it would be in a jewel case attached to the cover. She looks at me with wary concern and asks if I had put anything on the CD (such as a computer virus, I assume) and I sarcastically ask her how I could have done that, asking her if I used the cover as a computer. Then I consider that technology might very well allow one to use a magazine cover as a computer, which I talk to her about for a very short time, but nothing negative commences and I remain cheerful. As I pay, holding my wallet open and taking out a fifty-dollar bill, I notice an unknown female on my right cheerfully looking at the hundred-dollar bills in my open wallet as I hold it up near the counter. It almost seems as if she never saw one before and, slightly wary, I put my wallet away. It turns out however, that she had not been looking at my wallet or even at me; perhaps something on the counter. This dream is a very good example of why dreams are nothing like stories. I am looking through a magazine, planning to ask the cashier where the cover CD is. The magazine is somehow then commercially wrapped, implying it always had been (thus I could not have been looking through it even though I was). I then tell the cashier that I thought it would be in a jewel case, which makes no sense as I said this spontaneously and had really not considered it in this manner. Then the cashier asks if I had “put something” on the CD. Obviously, being wrapped, I could not have, and even if I had, I am buying it, so whatever I might have put on it would only be in my possession and with no problem or concern for others. Additionally, my mother died in 2002, yet my son, born in 2007, is with me at his present age. My mother only ever lived in America and would not have had Australian money of such an amount to give me, thus making the setting itself ambiguous by location. Omni magazine stopped publication (in print) in Winter 1995. The Casper comic book, though new, was like one from around 1971. The threads of the fictional dream self always seem completely different each time and from many different timelines and temporary false memories.
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