Recent DJ Posts

I am in the car with my family. We are talking about death and the afterlife. At some point, I mention not being afraid of death. This leads into someone handing me a bomb, the rest of my family disappearing, and the bomb going off.

The pain is momentarily unbearable, a searing white-hot burn coursing through every bit of my body. Even worse is the immense, crushing pressure. Once the burn ebbs away, the pressure increases, and a loud silence pulses. It feels like I'm breaking apart.

Suddenly I am somewhere else, and someone is asking for my information at a desk. I ignore her and look arond. It looks like an old house converted into a wellness center. There are a lot of confused poeple of all ages shuffling around. Someone yells out, "Come this way if you want answers," so I decide to follow the voice and check it out. I go where the man directs. The room I walk into next looks like an old classroom with wooden desks; there are already many people seated, waiting expectantly.

As I sit, I realize something isn't right and try to push my fingers through my palm. It doesn't work the first time, but my fingers push through the second time. I quickly pull them out and stare in wonder. The mistake I make here is instead of realizing I'm dreaming, I believe I am dead.

The instructor is going on about something irrelevant until I interrupt him and say, "I'm dead, right?" He stares at me and slowly says "yes" in a quiet voice. Instead of being upset, I become curious and start asking questions regarding afterlife and the astral planes. People look at me, confused, and whispering amongst each other. I'm eventually ushered out of the room (I did do a demonstration of how I pushed my fingers through my palm, maybe that's what did me in) and the instructor tells me to keep quiet. I ignore him and move on to explore.

I find the basement of the house, and thus find something strange. There are hundereds of "cores", strange bowl-like crystalline structures that change colors constantly. They appear in sets of five, the middle corse containing a black orb. I know these are the people's life cores, and my own.

Sometime later on, a creature smashes through the wall. It's huge and looks reptilian, and causes immense chaos. It smashes many of the cores, including some of mine, and I hunch over in pain. I run back up the stairs, yelling and warning people about the creature. Seems like the excitement wakes me up.

06-13-2017 -- Shopping at Publix, and actually making a comment during the dream about 'where shopping is supposed to be a pleasure.' Wandering around the place quite a bit, though I can't fully remember why. What I can remember is going out to the car (white Corolla, for some odd reason) several times. One time, I was kind of being half-followed around the store by a couple of troublemakers who would literally bump into me now and then, and trying to cause trouble. Another time, while I was out at the car, I opened the trunk and found three black or dark blue ski masks that had a really creepy vibe to them.

Back into the store, and pushing around a shopping cart trying to find a place where I can take it in or out, grabbing food, and trying to check it out with one of the cashiers, then head back outside. This time I glance up to see a couple of T-Rex-like dinosaurs off in the distance, waving around machine guns and heading our way. People start screaming, including myself (no real surprise), and we try to run back into the store, but the dinosaurs are moving too quickly, and are firing at us. I act like I've been hit and drop to the ground, playing dead, but it doesn't seem to fool the dinosaur, because he walks right up to me and starts firing the gun directly at my head. I am getting quite a headache from this, but other than that, suffer no real harm.

So since the dinosaur is still shooting me and playing dead isn't doing much good, I hop to my feet, and just turn to walk in the store, which really freaks the dinosaur out. As I step inside, the place is a mess. There are wounded and blood everywhere. Some are sick (mentally) because of what they've seen, and are throwing up. There's a really dark, spooky, apocalyptic feel to the whole thing, with the slightest hint of zombies. I take the escalators up to the third floor, where I wander into a sort of a homeless shelter-style dorm room with bunk beds all around. One poor, deluded soul is painting scripture-sounding verses on the walls, but he's really messed up, and the verses are twisted, inaccurate, and foolish.

We're all just kind of standing around and talking, and I mention I've got some creepy ski masks if anybody needs them, though I say I have no idea where they came from, and nobody seems to much care. At one point, they open up a roll-up door in the northeast wall, and a whole bunch of people come marching in, four abreast, looking almost like they are on a stand-up roller coaster. Somehow they don't want to be here, and have volunteered to all be shot out of a giant slingshot ... and remember, we're on the third floor, here. It's really screwy. Anyway, once they've been shot out, we're all kind of congregating around the door into the dorm, discussing how that was wrong and freaky, and in just kind of shuffling around, I step through the door without even meaning to.

Lights start flashing and an alarm starts blaring, and I'm a little freaked out as everybody else steps back from me. It turns out I've now been here for something like three years or something, but I never realized that once we entered the dorm, we're not allowed to exit it unless they ask us to. Some guy dressed up in a sort of monk's habit walks up to me, and is kind of pushing me along, while asking if I thought I could just pretend the whole thing never happened, and I hopefully say something like "Well, I'd be glad to," but he's not allowing it. They open the roll-up door again, and are pushing me into a sort of parachute harness kind of thing, then I'm pushed out the door. I drop the three floors, but the harness keeps me safe, and when I hit the ground I take it off and drop it.

I'm in what used to be the open parking lot of the Publix, but it has now been converted into a covered parking structure with soldiers kind of wandering around. I glance around to see where the soldiers are and who else is around, and see a strange figure that I could swear I half-remember from some sort of movie or TV show, but can't remember what. The guy seems like a cross between Trick (the mayor's assistant from BtVS) and the Joker, or just some weird guy in a sort of jester costume, but he kind of tilts his head, gives me an odd look, and dances a few steps of an odd little jig that makes it look like he is a marionette or something. I know I should remember this, but I just can't place it.

Crouched down on the ground and muttering to himself is somebody I kind of recognize. It is mostly Tom Courtney, with just a hint of Miles O'Brien thrown in, and he's kind of muttering to himself, something about how God has told him to wait here, and he's trusted, and waited, and been left alone, and it seems he has probably been waiting for me. Meanwhile, there's this whole sort of Logan's Run kind of vibe going on, as all the soldiers and creepy people keep kind of starting to approach us, then back off, because the spot on Tom's hand is green, and the spot that was on my hand has kind of been painted over white, because I was thrown out of the dorms, but God protected me from the gun, and is still protecting me, and since neither of us have the red spot, they can't come after us, but they keep trying to start in our direction, anyway. Meanwhile, I am just looking around the parking lot, trying to find out where my white Corolla is. Strange! Very strange.

Dream 1 - 2:10AM

I can see towards a house. It's located near my estate over the old train lines rump. As I'm observing the house I can hear a man talking to an interviewer. He's telling the interviewer about everything I'm looking at. He house seems to be a spiritual house from what the man is saying. He's talking about meditation. I see a door which has a webbing design going across it.

I see the house from a distance again and the man explains about the Winter Olympics coming here, or had recently been. I think I see the house with snow around it.

Dream 2 - 6:40AM

I'm at my house and I see my brother and someone else. They're talking to Daryl and his Mum on Skype via the computer, which is in the rumpus room. I don't seem to want to chat to Daryl, but I walk up to the screen anyways. I'm shirtless and Daryl spots me, and tells me I'm looking leaner then the last time he saw me.

I make the journey over towards Daryl's house. He doesn't know I'm coming over as it's a bit of a surprise. I'm standing in front of his house and it feels as if I've been here before (in a previous dream). The funny looking boat in the drive way even looks the same if not similar. As I'm walking towards the door I see Daryl's Mum. I greet her and tell her she's lost weight. Her face was a lot thinner and sunken in a tad. She says yes, and puts her head down as if she is thin for the wrong reasons. I have a strong feeling she is unwell and maybe been diagnosed with cancer. I feel bad for telling her she lost weight, just in case that was the reason behind the weight loss. I look across the road and see that 2 men are walking their dogs. One of the guys says to the other, something about the way he walks (dog walks in between his legs), is the reason he finds it difficult. The mans dog which walks it strangely, starts to urinate. It looks as if the man is holding the back legs up, making it do a hand stand while in mid stream. The dogs penis looks massive from the distance. The other man walks in the opposite direction, back over the fence into the grassy area. Daryl comes to the door and we greet each other. A dog comes to the front door. It's looks like a grey hound. Daryl's Mum is holding their dog, which looks like a black Labrador. Jane puts her dogs paw towards the other dog so it can sniff her dog.

Within no time, the Labrador is laying it's head on the grey hound, as if they're best mates.

Dream 3

I'm walking across the road near the ice cream shop, when I can read a mans intentions from the distance. He's intentions were to act as if he is a homeless bum, and to attack me. I can see 2 dogs at the end of the lights where the man is. As I'm walking across the road, I walk at a 10 o'clock angle to try and stay away from the man. He does the same and walks in my direction. (Feels like I have been here before and done a similar thing) I begin to make a run for it and head towards an undercover car park. I see a man inside a little booth and hope he's able to help me, but he locks himself in and doesn't intervene. I throw my wallet down on the ground. Moments later I turn around and punch the man chasing me in the face. It's a good hit, and drops him on his arse. I start to think about the damage I would have done to his eye. I eventually make my way back to towards the wallet. In the process of walking there, I see a picture of a achievement unlock for missing item not acclaimed. It says that I failed to complete finding my wallet, and that it had been taken by the man chasing me. Another picture comes up showing the amount which was left in my wallet. There was around $1000 in it. I can see similar threads to Kayley's, when looking for wallet?

Dream 4

I'm sitting on the ground and Daryl is showing me pictures of his friends son and daughter. The kids look a little odd looking. Daryl seems to favor the son. The photo of the son was of him standing close to the camera, whereas the daughter was amongst other people sitting on a couch.I can see a picture of Daryl receiving a birthday cake off of his friends in Yeppoon. They got him a ice cream cake.

Daryl is standing at a fridge. He's holding up the box which has the cake in it. I catch a glimpse of the brand on the box which doesn't look familiar. Daryl offers me some but I decline. I do eventually try a little just to get the taste. Daryl raves about how good it tastes but i don't seem to rate it as highly as he does. It's good but nothing special. As they're sitting down, his Mum explains that it would be much better if it had some kind of fruit in it, as well as other stuff. I debate what would be good for the cake and show them a cooking article, which looks to be on a kindle looking device. Daryl unfolds his, now looking like paper.

Dream 5

I'm in a bedroom with my brother. He tells me to hide, because a women in red is coming into the room and he wants to play a prank on them. I hide under the bed which doesn't have a mattress on it. The only thing that's making me less visible is the wooden slats connected to the bed. I worry that I'll be seen. The old women walks into the room and we both lock eyes. I'm sure I've been caught hiding but she doesn't see me. As she walks up a few steps to exit the bedroom my brother hits the button which plays a scary sound, hoping to scare the shit out of the people entering. Another victim walks into the bedroom, and this time it's a young black women. She reminds me of my brothers old girlfriend, except she was white. The black women seems very energetic and is acting all excited. She looks to be stealing stuff off the bed and I realize I left my phone on bed. She doesn't grab the phone. She starts dancing and singing, while eating some kind of treat on the bed. It was inside a box. As she leaves my brother hits the button and scares her. A man walks into the room for a moment then leaves. I don't get to see him, but I heard that he threatened to kill whoever scared him. The door that they all exited out of was my dad's bedroom door.

We're in the kitchen. This time Josh is with us. We tell him what we had been up too and I found it hilarious. My brother didn't seem to think it was as funny as I thought. I notice I have an erection and not wearing any pants, just underwear. I see Dale Thomas (AFL Player) in a scene, he's talking about how he wired up the connections for the clubs internet. I can now see another AFL Player kick the ball up into the air next to a goal post. I think they're looking to shorten the posts. Dale notices the player is kicking wrong and he helps him kick correctly.

Dream Fragments:

I'm in my house and I fart a little too hard and at the wrong time. To sum it up, I shat my pants. I can feel the warmth of the poo sitting in my pants and feel it running down towards my feet. I rush myself toward the toilet, looking like a person who just shat themselves. Lol.

Side Notes:

Swapped mattresses. Felt a little soft. Got to sleep quicker then usual. Woke up around 5AM and struggled to get to sleep for an hour.

Dream - Lucid

I was inside some building at night. I don't know for sure what it was, but I was inside a bathroom in this building. Inside the bathroom was me, a police officer or some kind of law enforcement officer, and Doug Funny, who was the criminal. It was like he was trying to escape. He had a mean, angry look on his face, and had blood on his shirt. I remember the police saying something to him. They left me with him so I could detain him.

Instead of detaining him, I spoke with him calmly. I looked for the wounds that were causing him to bleed, and saw two areas that looked like a bunch of raised blisters, one of the back of his head, and one on his stomach, but the one on his stomach was just a bunch of nutshells. I brushed off the nutshells. I told him I would bandage up the back of his head. He asked me to wrap some gauze around it. I told him I would.
"Let me go look in the first aid kit," I said.

I looked for the first aid kit, and couldn't find it.

I then was in a room in the same building that had some long cafeteria tables in it. There were a few people at the tables eating, one being one of my managers from my old job, Laura. I think Doug Funny was also sitting there. I was worried that he would get in trouble for being there. I sat at a table that had someone else at it, but I sat alone. I was looking at my phone; I knew the sun would be up soon (I think this was bleeding in from having to be up early for work this morning). I remember talking to Laura at some point.

I then went looking for another bathroom, because I had to go. I found two bathrooms, and instead of being marked "Men's" and "Women's", they were marked "Physical" and "Spiritual". I knew it was referring to physical families and spiritual families, and it had something to do with the Muslim faith. I went inside the one that said spiritual. Inside, there were these huge, luxurious stalls. I went into one that was close to the back. No one else was in there, but I felt more comfortable there. I sat on the toilet, and an oriental woman came up to me and started setting up this station for a foot massage. I quickly told her
"No thank you, I don't need a foot massage!"
She promptly left. I didn't want a foot massage while I was pooping.

I remember having flesh-colored feces in a plastic Ziplock bag. I had to hold them in place while I tried to go to the bathroom? Didn't really understand this part too well.

Then, as I was leaving the bathroom, I ran into a young Middle Eastern couple, maybe in their 30's or so. The man started to speak with me about Muslim spiritual families, using all these terms that I did not understand. His wife then said
"Honey, she has no idea what you're talking about."

~

I know I had a dream before this one, but again, insomnia kicked my ass for half the night. Getting pretty fed up with this sleeplessness stuff. I guess I was spoiled for awhile and was getting plenty of sleep. Now, I just can't seem to catch more than a few hours. Bleh.

Hello all,
This is just an introductory entry. To get the ball rolling. I'm very much interested in dreaming, different dimensions, spiritual/esoteric knowledge, psychic phenomenon, etc etc.

I hope to dive deeper into my understanding of these things.

Hope some of ya'll find my entries interesting!
I've had two lucid dreams so far. so far so good

- phil

December 24

Bed time 22 PM

WBTB 3 AM. I remembered two fragments: the first was about my friend who caught a flu and the second was about David Duchovny being a guest in some TV series.
I then took 4 mg galantamine and went back to bed

4: 50 AM I woke up from an epic journey. I remained stunned for a few minutes.

The dream started with a false awakening, although I couldn't realize it. I woke up because someone was grabbing and pinching me. Nervously i got up and went to check my phone. It began to glitch. My phone started showing some old message conversations with people I knew long time ago. I decided to go to kitchen. My mom is there. She is making coffee. On the counter I saw a Snickers. I was going to eat that for breakfast.
-I don't feel right, something strange is happening to me. -I told my mom.
-Don't be silly. -she replied and continued to twist in a kitchen.
I went to take something to put on. I opened a drawer and took a shirt. As I tried to close the drawer it stuck in the middle. I couldn't close it. I went back to kitchen to announce that the drawer doesn't close. My mom went to check it. She tried to close it and succeeded from the first time.
-What a scatterbrain... -she mumbled.
"That's strange" i thought. I checked what time was that. It was 8:52. I had to be at the bus station at 8:50 to arrive at the university for the first lecture. The first lecture was Psychology. As I couldn't make to the bus on time, I decided to pass the first lecture. I felt kind of drowsy. I felt like drunk + smoked out + tired. I started to wonder what the fuck is wrong with that drawer? Tried to open and close it again. Everything is okay. However, I always got feeling that something is wrong. The atmosphere was Matrix'ish or Inception'ish - everything is okay, but sometimes little glitches happen which make you doubt whether this is real world... AND I DIDN'T realize I WAS DREAMING. STUPID ME!


Then really weird shit happened. Some kind of dark angel appeared in front of me. It looked like that angel from Digimons, only it was black. It was female and very tall. With confidence I went to my Mom and asked:
-How would you explain that a fucking black angel is in our home?
-Look, what is wrong with you? Do you use drugs or something? -she asked.
I crumpled on the floor in disbelief that my Mother talks to me like this, that she doesn't believe me and can't help me... As I was sitting on the floor i saw the black angel becoming bigger and angrier. Her smile became evil and she laughed at me. I looked up at her and somehow it popped to my head that she feeds on my emotions. I got up, smiled and tried not to be sad. I tried not to care about "my mom not believing me" situation. And voila! The black angel became smaller and normal looking again.

She came closer to me, kneel down and showed me a silver pendant. I recognized an eye of Horus in that. Although it was more complex. The pendant was lying on the palm of the dark angel. Her palm was burnt out with that symbol. Her hand was dirty and the skin was coarse. I remember her hand in very great detail.
-One, who has this pendant, lives forever. -she said quietly, -I live the fourth time already. -added the angel. She told me she will wait me in the church and disappeared... I was thinking "damn..I am definitely not drugged or something, I am sober, I guess every in-some-way-spiritual person begins to see something more than normal people. This angel will be like my imaginative friend, or maybe my guide...."


I am at the church. There is a huge castle model inside. I see mini soldiers participating in the castle siege. Like in a video game, they survive an enemy wave and then goof around shooting team mates. It was strange because some soldiers used very modern machine guns. I saw empty golden rounds all around. My attention was caught by a lady in black. That's her! The black angel! She has changed her clothes. She was wearing a shiny tight corset expressing her waist and breasts. She didn't wear a mask. I saw her face. She had long dark hair. The black angel was beautiful and sexy but somehow not my type.

A thought came to my head: "I don't know...I don't know why I came to the church, I don't know who that black angel is. I must be careful. I can't trust her so bluntly. What if she is a demon?" I was watching her and made a cross sign with my fingers in my pocket. "If she's a demon, that should generate some reaction from her." However she didn't even looked once to my side. I saw how she pulled out her Iphone and began to talk with someone.

There was a little boar on the floor. It looked interesting. The boar was size of a foot. I came close to it and that little bastard suddenly jumped on my arm and bit me. The boar toothed to my sleeve and didn't let go. I was trying to shake it off - no luck. I started running around and shaking my hand to get rid of it. I tried to get the boar off with my other hand, but then he would stick to that hand too! Finally I found a way how to get rid of it. " I need to make a double shake off." When the boar toothed to my sleeve I grabbed it with my other hand and immediately shook it off the floor. That fury bastard didn't give up. He was running after me. And he was faster! He jumped and got his teeth in my ass. I screamed out of pain and woke up! I felt a real sting in my ass for a few seconds

I took noted about this dream and went back to bed.

8:50. Remembered one fragment about me being the only white guy in a group.
Also remembered one dream about me participating in a beatbox battle, then struggling to find a place to eat, my friend spending lots of money on alcohol, me buying him a conference ticket and so in..

15:00 I took a nap and remember one fragment about talking with my grandparents.

I heard galantamine stays in system for 48 hours, so I hope it would help me tonight too!
All in all I am very happy with such a cool dream. However I am disappointed I couldn't become lucid

12-19-2013 -- [Two detailed lucids today, surrounded by days of nothing even memorable. Sigh! But these two dreams were really cool!] I am in a supermarket that seems familiar, though I cannot identify the exact chain or location. There is a bit with managers and entering through turnstiles or something that seem vaguely reminiscent of other recent dreams, then soon I am wandering the aisles. Eventually I come across an aisle that has snack cakes, and among the various offerings are the Little Debbie Christmas Cakes that I enjoy. But for some reason the packs have been broken up, and the individual plastic-wrapped two packs are being offered for sale, and a few of them are a new strawberry flavor, rather than my usual preferred chocolate flavored ones. Since I don't know if they are any good, I decide to open one and eat it, to test how I like it, so I can decide if I want to buy a bunch of them or not. I figure I will just take the wrapper to the register with whatever else I decide to purchase, and pay for them all at once. I don't really like the strawberry ones that much, but I still want to get some of the chocolate.

Suddenly I find I have left the store, and I don't know why, but I am kind of worried about it. I never paid for the one I ate, and even if I go back, they are going to be mad at me, and darn it, I don't even know why I left! I find myself in an odd blend of California and Omaha that I have dreamed of before. I am on a freeway that is a cross between the 22 in California and I-680 in Omaha. I am trying to figure out exactly where I am and where the store was and get back to it, and I seem to be driving Joe L's Lexus SUV. I am just starting to turn a corner while muttering about pizza, and a nearby cop hears me and calls me over. I am worried about a ticket or something, but no, he just points to an NYPD (New York Pizza Deli) and says it is his favorite. Soon after, some rough looking guys in a beat up van (who look like they could be real trouble) are flagging me down ... to make their own recommendation! Nuts, all of them!

Soon I am back on the freeway, heading north, but the car has disappeared, and I am now flying along. Soon I am flying through a building, and some woman is attacking me, saying something about how because I am flying, I killed her husband. I think my dead mom is trying to argue with her about it. Meanwhile, I am just trying to get away from the crazy woman when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I glance back to find a ghostly angel flying above me. I think it is Louie Anderson [and it took me perhaps 45 minutes to find him on the internet to identify him ... though it turns out he is not dead in real life, like I thought], who apologizes for her, saying she doesn't really mean it, she is just upset about his death. Though I had nothing to do with Louie's death, somehow I help his wife to easily pass on to join him, and the two of them fly off to heaven.

Meanwhile, they have carried me far higher into the air than I usually manage to fly on my own, and I find myself up around maybe thirty stories in the air, and am flying back toward the ground. I am worried about hitting the power lines and such, which are everywhere, and almost forming a net waiting for me, but the positive aspects of the dream hold, and I easily sail through them without getting caught up, until I am back at a level I am comfortable with, 20 to 30 feet in the air. I am now getting fairly close to where I think the store is, but I find myself flying through the middle of a generic shopping mall (not one of the specific ones I often dream of). I am now flying south through this mall, heading for an exit, but there are a couple of sisters (at least I assume they are sisters, as they look quite similar.) They are large women, bulky, but not seriously fat. They remind me of a cross between one of my relatives and a balloon artist named Patricia Bunnell. They are kind of chasing me and trying to catch me for my daring to be different and unique, and having the ability to fly.

I speed up and try to fly to the exit, but they sense what I am doing. "He's trying to escape," they scream, and rush to the doors ahead of me, blocking them off so I can't get through. So I turn around and start to fly in the opposite direction, figuring I will lose them, and find another set of doors to exit out of. Problem is, others start to chase me, more out of interest than the anger the two women were showing. One guy and his wife are close, and he manages to grab my leg even though I am right up by the ceiling, because he is 9 or 10 feet tall, with long arms. Darn it! I keep trying to slip his grasp and fly away, and as they hold on to me, they both figure out how to fly, and are soon able to fly on their own. "How is this possible?" she asks. "It's a dream," I reply. "We're all dreaming?" I don't want to be rude and tell her she is probably only a figment of my imagination, so I hedge and say "I only know that I am dreaming." "Well, how did you get so smart about dreams?" And I start to explain to her how I started making lists of my dreams back in high school, and by now have thousands of dreams written down to learn from. I also hint at the fact that since I know I am dreaming, I might find somebody to have some fun with.

By this point, right as I am considering landing and trying to lose myself in the crowd, we exit through some doors on the west side of the mall, and the couple let go of me, and decide to fly off on their own to their own adventure. I'm pleased to find I am finally free, and am about to soar off and resume trying to find the grocery store, when suddenly somebody else latches on to me. I find it is a tall, attractive, rather Nordic blonde with a thick Nordic accent. "How?" she demands of me, as we drift through the air. I start explaining about knowing you are dreaming as I wrap my arms around her. I tell her she is warm and safe and protected. I won't let anything happen to her. I steal a line from Douglas Adams and explain that flying is really quite simple ... you just have to throw yourself at the ground, and miss. But I stress it's the bit about missing that is important, because otherwise it can be kind of painful. I wrap my arms further around her as she chuckles, very close to feeling her up as I continue this wonderful new technique of seduction by teaching flying.

07-21-2013 -- I am walking by an apartment complex on either Hickory or Dale, where there is no apartment complex. I am more or less minding my own business, when I run into this guy who starts yelling at me. He tells me I am worthless and horrible, and he knew my mother, and my actions caused her to die in sorrow, and I ought to just go off and die, myself ... he goes on and on and on with really horrible accusations. I think back to the life my mother lived, and how old she was when she died, and how our relationship was (fine), and I can't see any reason for his accusations, and I tell him so, but he just keeps screaming at me, while I sit at this picnic table and begin to doubt myself and feel worse and worse. He finally stalks off, leaving me depressed, until a nice fellow I recognize from around the place comes up to me, asks me what is wrong, and tries to console me for a bit.

Soon I am feeling a little better, and I start to look around. I spot something that seems a little interesting: there is an empty tape box sitting next to an unlabeled tape, and the tape box says it is the first of three parts in a continuation of the Chronicles of Narnia, the first of which is about the silver throne at Cair Paravel. I instantly slide the unlabeled tape into a machine that instantly makes me a copy of it.

Soon I find myself in a family-type setting with a father and his little girl, and there is a VCR there, so I stick the tape in, wanting to watch it. There is a flash of light, and I suddenly realize. I have no idea what is on this tape. Sure, it could have been the the tape of the new Chronicles. It could also be a porno tape, just about to blare out a sex scene in front of this little girl! I violently stab at the eject button, and we see just a couple of seconds of a pair of silver boots sitting right in front of a ruby throne, before the tape ejects. I guess it was the right tape.

The father glances at me, as if to ask what's up, and I explain about the whole thing, and not being sure about what was on the tape, and even about feeling guilty for copying it. I apologize, and he looks at me like I am crazy, and decides to ignore me. He may be ignoring me, but a Narnian dwarf suddenly appears in front of me and tells me it is no real problem. If I can't finish the tape before leaving the library, they'll gladly make a transcript for me. He takes the tape and disappears with a pop, and I suddenly know the next time I make it back to the room where I copied the tape, I'll have a printed copy of it that I can take legally. I start to walk away feeling much better about myself.

I soon find myself in a small village of small houses with thatched roofs, and a young woman asks me what I am so happy about. I start to explain about more stories in Narnia, and the dwarf and the video tape, but she is walking away from me to the right. I turn to the left and see the same woman, and her daughter, and she asks me "What are you talking about?" "The Narnia story I was just telling you about." She says I wasn't telling her about any story, and I turn to look to the right and see a bent and shuffling old woman just about to turn the corner. She seems very sinister, somehow. I call out to her to wait a second, but she just continues around the corner.

I chase after her, and I see her just entering a crowd, so I continue forward, but when I get there, she is nowhere in sight. It is like she just disappeared into thin air. I find myself in the middle of maybe a dozen or so clowns, in rather duller makeup than normal, and ask if it is a convention or something. I am waiting for an answer, until I hear a noise that causes me to turn around back the way I came. There are three little girls standing there, being approached by a bent old hag looking more and more like the hag the queen turned into in Snow White to give her the apple. I realize whatever this thing is, it can change shapes to look like anybody it wants to. I run forward to grapple with 'her' and protect the little girls, and I suddenly find I am wrestling with a grim reaper figure in black robes (which I facetiously refer to as Skeletor) and losing the battle.

Finally I start speaking to it in the name of Jesus, and it starts to steam a little bit, and flinch back from me in pain, and as I continue, it breaks away and tries to run off. I give chase again, but it runs forward into another crowd of people. I run forward, and find myself being grabbed. I tense, ready to fight, but it is three Golden Horseshoe can-can girls who have pulled me into a tickle war. Three ladies working together, not one, not the thing, whatever it is. Soon I am walking along, studying everyone I see very carefully, looking for the old hag, or any single person.

Suddenly I find it is very dark, almost pitch black, and I am walking near the door to my apartment complex with no idea how I got there. It is kind of foggy, and there is a forboding figure looming in the fog just by my door. Just as I realize I have fallen asleep at some point, and am now dreaming, the figure jumps out and attacks me. Now I am able to see it's true form, a red devil in a black death robe, and I am very, very scared that this thing can invade me dreams. But there is no hesitation this time. "I come against you in the name of Jesus! I come against you in the name of Jesus!" It is flinching at the name. "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" Suddenly there is a powerful figure, an angel, standing next to me, battling the creature. Unexpectedly, it is female. I thought angels were male ....

She speaks in one of it's ears "I come against you in the name of Jesus." I follow and do the same. She does the same to the other ear, and again I follow, and do the same. It writhes at our words. Just as I realize we ought to do one ear each at the same time, I wake up, panting from the battle.

5/4/2013

Dreamed a woman and a man were dancing at some party...all of a sudden the female had the dance spotlight on her and she started dancing and doing all of these weird moves like she was in a dance competition. Everyone started to cheer her on as she did all the latest dance moves. The more pumped the crowd got, the harder she danced. She twisted her body into all kinds of shapes, jerked and spun around rocking out to the melody. At one point, she spun around so rapidly, her spiritual body double spun right out of her physical body and landed right in front of me ! The 'dancing-spiritual' body double was still in a full spinning rotation as the 'real' lady just kept on dancing. Even after the music had slowed down and the real lady and slowed down her dancing, her dancing spiritual double was still in front of me spinning away like a 'toy top'...then I woke up.


Question to myself: Why didn't I see this as a sign (the woman's body double) and do a reality check and become lucid ???

I am by the side of a highway with a group of people my family knows. Everyone here is getting ready to leave to somewhere else. I learn that I might ride with the H___ family but instead I ride with "S" in a blue 2002 Jeep Wrangler.("S" is a friend from High School who is charismatic, and usually the center of attention always making fun of anyone and anything.) "S" drives down a winding road through mountains. The road now traverses along a rocky coast similar to the coastal highway in Southern California. I look at some mansions on the cliffs. "S" looks at the mansions too even though he is driving. "S" drives fast around a curve and almost drives into the ocean. We drive by another curve and this time, "S" drives over the cliff and the Jeep plunges into the ocean. The Jeep slides very fast along the water until we reach San Diego Bay. At this point, the Jeep stops sliding and starts sinking into the water. I kick out the passenger window of the Jeep and try to swim to the surface but the water is impossible to swim through and I sink to the bottom and drown. "S" also drowns.

After I have died, I wash up on a beach in the afterlife. I am also somewhat aware that I am dreaming but I forget I'm dreaming soon.

Here in the Afterlife, there is a 3 story Victorian-style building up several steps from the beach. Me and "S" walk into the building. The building is dark inside. There are lots of symbols on the walls in various places. Everything has some sort of spiritual significance. I become seperated from "S" and I continue walking. I run into my father who tells me that my grandfather (his father) wants me to know not to get into an SUV with "S" (grandfather and "S" don't know each other in RL). I continue walking and run into my ex-girlfriend "A". I learn that "A" died around the same time I did. We both walk together through the building and walk into a room where we find "S" lying on the floor unconscious and bleeding. Me and "A" carry "S" out of the room and ask each other what we thought happened. We carry him down some stairs to the first level of the building. I see a placque on a wall that says "***** *** for OCD --> COD *** ***** **" (**** means I don't remember what word was). It also says that the location were in is Heaven for people with OCD (I have OCD). It also says that people who die and end up in this world who don't have OCD go to Hell.

Around this point, I feel the dream starting to end and remember that I am dreaming. I mentally force the dream to be stronger so I don't wake up.

Me and "A" leave the building and are now at a beach in San Diego, CA, still in the afterlife though. I mentally learn that I will soon be transferred to another world in the Afterlife. I get the feeling that the Afterlife is very chaotic. I see the beach a couple blocks away so me and "A" fly to the beach. I see some hot women on the beach and think about having sex with them, but since having sex usually ends the lucid dream, I decide not to. Me and "A" land on the beach. I leave "A" behind here and fly over the ocean by myself.

While flying over the ocean, the lifeguards (ironic that lifeguards exist in the [I]after[I]life.) tell me to stop flying since there is rule at this beach against flying. A female lifeguard flies after me and catches me. We both land on the beach. This lifeguard is 5"4', skinny, has blonde hair, and is age 19.I am now in trouble and have to stay with the female lifeguard until further notice. At first, I don't like her, but as I stay with her, I find her more attractive and strike up conversation with her. I ask her how she died but she doesn't respond. We both keep walking and meet up with her parents. The 3 of them have to go somewhere so I say goodbye and hug the lifeguard. Her father tells me that if I pursue his daughter, I must love her always. He says their family has gone through a great tragedy. All 3 of them died together a little over a year ago. The 3 of them walk off and I think about whether I should dedicate myself to the lifeguard or find another girl with less baggage. I decide to meet the lifeguard tomorrow to continue our conversation.

For the most part, the dream is over after this point. I get transported to a mall, then to my house where I watch TV. I am watching the news. I turn the TV off and at the exact moment the TV goes off, I wake up.

I catch glimpses of the faces of those around me as I move through the hallways. Sadness, happiness, apathy. Mostly indifference. The faces of those simply cycling through the motions of life. No soul, no purpose. Am I any different?

Out the corner of my eye I catch sight of a face. That girl. I know her. But from where? The face is uncanny. Green glasses, strawberry blonde hair. Who is this?

She looks at me. A smile.

The motions of life continue. Hours go by. I move through these hallways unaware of where they lead. One of the crowd. Destinationless. Faceless. Then I see her again.

In that moment we remember everything. The life we've known each other, the memories we've shared. The lives we've descended on through the wheel of time. The cycle of Samsara experienced over and over and over again. Tears flow from our eyes.

"How could I ever forget you?" she says.

Reality sheds its skin before our eyes and we gaze upon the vast and beautiful jungle before us. The immense garden of beauty, one only to be found within the collective dreams of all mankind. We dangle from the branches of trees. Two serpents. Entwined in an act of ethereal love, one with the phantasmagorical sights surrounding us. My rich blue body glide across the deep purple scales of hers to produce a radiant swirl of colorful energy, spiraling outward from the center of our entanglement. Our bond is electrifying.

This is life. This is truth. This is where we are and always have been. This is real.

______

I awake and dust of the crust from my eyes. Back in this reality.. How unfortunate. What the hell just happened? Who was that girl? I pick up my phone to text D about the dream that just occurred - a morning tradition. I speak of the girl, the snakes, the forest - the total experience.

".. she kind of reminded me of you, actually, but healthier and with more vitality," I tell her

"I had strawberry blonde hair and wore green glasses back in about 2008, before my health problems. That would be amazing if that was me."

And then it clicks. Was that her? Have we shared previous lifetimes together? The bond we share and the synchronicities we've experienced are already extraordinary on their own. Is this possible? There may never be a way to find out the truth. This life we live in is a mysterious one. This reality - is it but a single world, or is this but one of many?

01-23-2013 -- I'm on some sort of church camping trip with Mike Sullins and the gang. I'm not sure, but I think I was an adult for the whole dream, kind of helping to oversee the trip, and it has been an OK trip, but not fabulous. We're loading up the bus to head back to the church, and I find myself trying to half claim one of the front seats. I am given the front bench on the passenger side, which is fine. Some little kid who may be the pastor's son is given the spot just under the bar that I used to love as a kid, but it doesn't bother me as I couldn't fit there as an adult, anyway.

Mike is driving, and the trip home from the usual camp (from dreams, didn't go camping with this church in real life) seems very short, only taking around 45 minutes, when it always seemed the trip used to take 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Soon we're pulling into the church parking lot, and starting to unload the bus, while waiting for parents to come and pick their kids up. I'm probably waiting for everybody else to be picked up, before I get a ride home on the bus.

Mike is going on and all about how good the Boy Scouts are, and how great the trip was, and stuff like that. He seems to be dressed in a scout master uniform, and the pastor's son is in a scout uniform. But something is said that seems to tick the kid off, and he suddenly stalks out of the room, down the driveway, and out to curb on Page Avenue.

He starts angrily calling for his dad, the pastor, who is standing about 20 feet away, but doesn't seem to hear him. This amazes me since I am much further away, and inside the building, but I can hear him just fine. After three loud calls, his father hears him, and walks over and picks him up. He talks to him and comforts him a bit, then puts him back in the room where I am waiting around.

The boy is maybe four or five, and he starts playing with a little girl who is maybe six or seven. Soon they're wrestling a bit, and there seem to be hints of Indian Wrestling in their play, but other forms of wrestling, as well. Somehow it overflows, and I am something of an innocent bystander, as I soon find myself lying on the ground, half-restrained, with them undoing my pants for some reason.

Right at that moment, the assistant pastor busts in, and starts ranting and raving, and wants to know what the Sam Hill is going on! I think he feels something wrong, sexually, is going on, as they are undoing my pants, and I try to defend myself by saying maybe I should have put a stop to things sooner, but I wouldn't have let it go any further if they had tried to pull down my pants, but he seems to blame the kids and feels they are being very evil, and I am only being foolish.

"What if they'd used super glue on you?" He demands. "It could have taken us hours to free you. Or even days if we couldn't get the proper solvent!" He keeps ranting on and on about how bad the kids were, and how could I have allowed this, and it is the story oh Jonah and the Whale all over again! I don't see it as the same thing at all. I don't see how that story ties in, and I don't see any of it as all that bad, but he just won't listen at all.

Finally I have had enough, and like the kid before me, I stalk out of the the room, step over a tiny fence (maybe a foot or a foot and a half tall, more decorative than anything else), and to the curb on Page Avenue, just like the pastor's son, before me. The assistant pastor is calling after me, trying to stop me from going, and not getting why I was so upset with him, but I won't listen, and I keep on my way. I walk down Page to Stanton, then walk under the freeway overpass, before making my way down Calendula and into the flower tract.

I don't know what the big deal is ... I don't agree with the guy, but its not like I don't still plan to attend church next week, or anything. But strange things are happening. People start trying to push me or grab me. The area is turning into a cross between a sort of an old age home and an apartment complex, though the entire neighborhood I am walking through is nothing but single family homes. But somehow I find myself in the apartment complexes behind the church, instead of in the neighborhood I was walking through. [The apartment complexes that aren't there in real life, but have been in lots of dreams.]

In past dreams these apartment complexes have had fun things and nightmare-style things happen in them. In this dream, they are bad things. I find myself arguing religion and politics with people, while going through unpleasant chase bits that seem to go on forever (though I think they really are pretty short.) At one point I am being grabbed an restrained by nurses because they don't agree with my principles, but soon they are turning into attractive-but-old-fashioned school teachers who have a sort of Stepford Wives sort of vibe to them.

I burst out of one apartment complex into a sort of hilly area, where I find myself trying to cross the hills while avoiding dangerous flaming horses. Since they are in groups of four, they just might be the four horses of the apocalypse. Strange and spooky. At first I try to hide from them, but then I find four of them right next to me in a wide open space, so all I can do is ignore them and hope they ignore me, or if they don't, hope I'm powerful enough to survive them.

The entire time, both political and spiritual arguments continue to go on in my head. I manage to get out of the hills and into another of the apartment complexes, but I'm still being chased by the old-fashioned brunettes, who are trying to wrestle me to the ground and restrain me. I don't understand why I find myself saying it, since it still seems to me that he was the nut, and the one in the wrong, but I suddenly speak out loud and say "Fine! I'll apologize to the assistant pastor."

A gap appears in the brick-wall corridor I am in, and I stumble into the lot of the construction supply company directly behind the church, free from all the people chasing me. "On Sunday, after church," I mutter to myself. 50 pound bags of cement start dropping on me. "OK, OK, right now." The cement stops dropping on me, and I claim over the brick wall into the church parking lot.

I approach one of the elders of the church and ask where the assistant pastor is, and he says he left about 15 minutes ago. He looks at me and says something like "You don't look like a process server, but I'm still not going to tell you where he lives or give you his phone number." I end up back in the same room, waiting (perhaps for a day or two) until the assistant pastor shows up again. "Really, God?!?" I kind of announce to the sky.

"Hey Dude! Don't disrespect the Lord!" I find a slightly angry hippie kind of shushing me. "Yeah? Let me tell you a story!" And I proceed to relate the entire dream to him, while he looks more and more flabbergasted as I go on. There are several others here, who also look more and more shocked. As I finish my tale, I look at them, all staring at me in amazement, and ask "Don't tell me the same thing happened to all of you?"

"Oh no, man," the hippie says. "Nothing like that happened to me. Not in the specifics. But in the overall, yeah, man. We're all here to apologize to the assistant pastor because we wouldn't listen to him, man! It's weird!"

I ingested a traditional tribal "flood" dose of Iboga, a oneirogen that induces a waking dream state for 12 - 48 hours & has been used for centuries by the people of Gabon as a coming of age shamanic plant. Basically you're Lucid Dreaming while awake. I decided to take the root when I found out about it & how unlike hallucinogens the visions you receive from Iboga are not vague or open to much interpretation. Many people see parts of their life replayed, they feel the pain or joy their actions caused. Some see deities or significant people in their life including people who've passed away. Some people claim it's the tree of knowledge of good & evil from the bible.

It was risky for me to begin with because I have a heart condition & Iboga is very intense on the heart. The idea is to experience complete ego death which is followed by all the visions. Going through hell to get to heaven. Knowing this I decided to take the root right before going into the emergency room so in case if anything happened I would be in good hands.

I was really yearning for a spiritual aspect to my life which had been lost. All my life I was told what to believe mixed with my own beliefs & thoughts about all these different possibilities. I felt as if it would be best for me to experience what is true for me spiritually myself. So I decided ego death & true transcendence along with visions of my life would give me some answers. Needless to say, I was not disappointed.



It started to come on subtlety at first, in the emergency room waiting area things became very dim & dead looking like all the warmth to colors was slowly being sucked out. I started to feel as if I was riding some giant wave of reality in isolation of everything around me. Like the world could swallow me whole at any moment. I started to get worried because the waiting room was full & only 30 minutes into a 2 day experience I could already feel some effects. I kept trying to stress the fact I had ingested something that could send me into a psychotic break, get sick, or kill me. That I needed to be in a bed with a heart monitor & people who could check on me & bring me water while I began to purge.

I eventually get to a room & there's a bed, I'm questioned by doctors nurses & staff constantly as I'm starting to trip. I tell them I ingested it for spiritual purposes & that I should avoid being overstimulated. I purposefully brought a long a sleeping mask & my phone to play music to help move things along. As soon as we made it to the room all this was taken as a precautionary measure to ensure I wouldn't try to hurt myself or someone with it. They kept questioning me for what seemed like an hour. The first part of the trip felt like my body was trying to escape reality, the conscious voice in my head got increasingly paranoid about death, going crazy, saying something wrong to the doctors or nurses. I increasingly was drawing a complete blank as I was being questioned, I kept saying umm more & more as thoughts escaped my mind. My consciousness was becoming consumed with fear as I lost the ability to think & create a coherent sentence. One doctor made me feel guilty saying I ingested a hallucinogen & I was wasting taxpayer money in my "recreational pursuit". This was a search for truth, for meaning. Eventually I asked to be left alone trying to avoid over-stimulation after I answered the same questions about 5 times to 5 different people.

I drank some water which was brought to me & my heart starts pounding like crazy, I hear this intense buzzing in my ears that sounds like I'm near a high voltage transformer or surrounded by beehives. My heart is spiking off the charts on the monitor & I'm told I went into VTAC Ventricular Tachycardia (where your heart beats so fast it could stop). I'm so nauseated & worried at this point I purge into a bucket this green liquid, it looks like I puked up part of the hulk or Nickelodeon slime. I start to feel this energy building at the base of my spine, like hot magma or electricity charging up. At this point my heart is going so fast I'm convinced I won't make it through this & that before I knew it I would be moving onto whatever's next. At this point my ego is just screaming in my head like it wants to murder me, "You're going to wake up insane, you're heart is exploding get ready for the pain, you're dead.. nice job".



Eventually after what seemed like hours of fighting between death & my mind I accept death. With acceptance I slowly start seeing with my eyes closed - red very strongly, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, then violet. As this is happening I feel that magma, that energy, that electricity building at the base of my spine slowly move up as I accept my fate. I kept thinking of mercury moving up a thermometer. With complete acceptance I jolted out into the universe a soul past the purple into an infinite white light. Being a part of it but there was no sense of "I" no me, no body, pure spirit & an overwhelming sense of connectedness & unconditional love overwhelming every ounce of being. Being one with the big bang, forget infinite energy, light, the realest thing you could sense in there was pure joy, bliss, unconditional love, complete peace. No thought, stillness, nothingness, the void.

I wake up sometime later after being moved to what I learn later is the ICU. I'm incredibly lucid & the personal visions are starting to come, I'm so lucid it's like the power of lucidity carried over into waking life. I imagine this medical light on the ceiling that looks like a mushroom cap stretching & changing shape. As I believe it stretches it does so & it really seems to work when I send it unconditional love from my chest. I imagine stretching it so far with love I eventually break through the ceiling into another room.



The first room I broke through into was like a dusty old worn down house with cobwebs all over, wooden floors, a broken window, & it looked like something no one would really appreciate. I notice in the dream I'm wearing clothes that appear to be like Link from Zelda. I'm greeted by two groups of people to my right. One of which is very happy, joyful, they have an inner-childlike sense to them. Curious, compassionate, encouraging, happy to be alive. They're cheering me on & saying great things about the room appreciating everything. I get the sense this is what I must do to move on. Love the room impartially, seeing the good in it. The other group of people seems miserable, they're void of color full of grays & find fault with the room saying things like "Ewww". I decide this is not the direction I want to take & I break down the wall by loving the place I'm at.

I end up in another room & another they're all very similar except each consecutive room is characterized by things of the chakra system. It seemed as though I was breaking down walls to move energy from the 1st chakra (the root) to the 7th chakra (the crown). The root is at the base of the spine & the crown is at the top of the head. A hierarchy of energy from the base of the spine to the top of the head; from the physical aspects of existence to the spiritual. Overall all the same lessons were to be learned. If I hesitated in loving a room, in breaking down a wall I was sent back to the beginning. It seemed like my visions were very influenced by the video games I played growing up. After a lot of tries I made it to the heart chakra (the central 4th & central chakra, the point where the physical aspects of our world become intertwined with the spiritual). Tibetan Buddhists believe the heart is responsible for the white light I saw, the white light people describe seeing before death right before moving onto the next life. Once I got to the heart alot of the questions I wanted answers to started getting answered.



I wanted to know who my soul mate was, what the meaning of life is, why we're here, what is truth for me. The first answer I got was about my soul mate. Right before the trip I was torn between this girl Windy & a girl Samantha I had just met who reminded me of Windy. Then it seems as though Windy had forgotten all about me but she holds such a big place in my heart I wasn't ready to move on. A free spirit, a soul that burns in the night with a deep passion for life, a fire within that you only read about. Her way of living inspired me to begin my spiritual journey which led me to this point. Little did I know there's a reason I dream of her almost every night, why I get Deja Vu around her so much, why when we first met I felt us both gaze into each others souls & I had this incredible sensation like we had met before. Iboga showed me we're soul mates & now I'm left waiting for the right time, for a chance to be her friend. If I ever get that chance I'll make it last until the end. In the vision when I reached the heart chakra I heard my voice boom out loud like I was asking who my soul mate was, it happened automatically like I didn't even have to think of it. It was like because I wrote down all my questions before taking the root the questions were already programmed into my subconscious to be asked later. As soon as that happened Windy appeared on a green lotus flower platform suspended in space & from there she yelled "Kenny! I love you! with such enthusiasm it warmed my soul. I heard her say "We're meant for eternity, our love will stand the test of time". The platform symbolized her heart chakra as I was on mine we communicated our love & our platforms moved together suspended in space until we were together & hugged & kissed with such passion I could feel a beam of love going from my heart to hers with such pure joy & ecstasy it was as if we became one in that moment & our souls were in complete bliss just combining with the others counter part.

Every part of this experience seemed more real than waking life & everyone I saw that I knew personally seemed to be their true self, like the inner child in them was fully out to be them-self, they were so creative & enthusiastic & passionate about everything they did or said. That alone was inspiring to me, passion is a big part of a joyful existence. Enthusiasm, joy, an inner curiosity & appreciation for everything. Every moment. Being true to yourself & not letting your mind convince you to hide or discard aspects of yourself. We have to laugh at the mind, our fears, doubts, insecurities, repression, limiting beliefs. They're all the enemies of progress & reaching our true potential I feel like I got the answers to my other questions through breaking through the walls & becoming one with the clear white light, pure consciousness, connectedness, bliss, joy, I'm a part of everything & everyone as they're a part of me. Unconditional love is the most powerful force in the universe & we have to learn to appreciate everything we do have. I live in America & have a car, a guitar. Do you know how amazing that is? We should all be happy when our basic needs are met because some people don't even have that luxury! Don't wait until you're nearly dead to start being grateful!

This by far was the most beneficial experience I've ever had even though it almost killed me it's like every day is a gift now. When the experience was over I was exhausted & slept for quite a while, when I woke up i saw the most beautiful sunrise I had ever seen from my hospital bed & I was so grateful to be alive, I made sure all the doctors & nurses knew how much I appreciated them taking care of me. I still laugh because when I woke up the kept asking me all these funny questions in case if I had gone crazy.. You did this for spiritual reasons? You said you were selfish before? Do you think eating is selfish?



Beliefs shape our reality, lucidity will show you that so take what you learn with lucidity back to waking life & meet your true potential, that is my foremost goal. Don't be afraid to explore, reintegrate lost parts of yourself, face nightmares with love & see what happens. Lucidity is an invaluable tool. In my second lucid dream ever through belief I was able to experience that ego-less state once again & I woke up feeling great! I highly recommend reading "Lucid Dreaming: Gateway to the Inner Self" by Robert Waggoner if you get the chance. I'm now completely committed to Lucidity for life. I ordered the Remee lucid dreaming mask & I'm so happy, this marks the beginning of my dream journal here & the beginning of my journey to the inner self. To reintegrating every last lost part of me. Healing what I rejected in the past & facing any & all fears. Going on adventures to space, Europe, Australia, Africa, Egypt, the Amazon all with my soul mate Windy who is still in my dreams almost every night (I bought an engagement ring by the way) & I'm saving it until the right time. Thanks for reading! I hope maybe I can inspire someone to strive for lucidity or to just go after their dreams I know my beliefs aren't for everyone. Happy dreaming

09-14-2012 -- I'm in my room setting up some sort of computer link that will allow me to broadcast some sort of video from my computer to others in the same room. People or making fun of me and insulting me, but I carry on. Soon I find I am not doing this is my room somewhere, but in the street right by Peter Marshall Elementary. In my dream I think I am on La Reina, but actually I am at the corner where Glencrest turns into Nancita.

It is dark, late in the evening, and I am just about to start the 'broadcast' when a young teen comes out of the house next to the school. He is very slim, but athletic, and seems to look like a cross between Kevin B. and Steve K. He has a bit of an attitude, but I ignore it, and peacefully invite him to join us. He is unsure, but does so.

Turns out what I am about to show is a documentary I made about a mean old guy (who turns out to have been the teen's grandpa) who lived in the house until he died. Though everybody in the neighborhood hated him (and he seemed to hate everybody) I tried to get to know him and understand him, and then documented the odd things that happened when he died.

Problem is, Hollywood came in at the same time and made a horror film 'based on a true story' that was truly horrifying. My documentary was very, very different. Because of all the attention Hollywood directed their way, the family just wants to be left alone to forget, but the neighbors remain up in arms. Which is why I am going to broadcast the thing here in the neighborhood on this night, to hopefully help everybody understand and quit freaking out.

As the documentary plays, you see little kids from the neighborhood talking about how mean and crazy and scary the old guy is. I try to approach the teen when he is several years younger, as he is walking from the house to the gate of the school. I am being very gentle as I ask if he will talk to me for a few minutes and answer some questions.

Where Hollywood produced a dark horror film, I recorded a tale of redemption and understand. I got to know the old guy, learned his history and why he got to be so mean, and slowly helped to reason him back to where he was willing to start being a nice guy again. As he was just starting to turn around, though, he died. And either God or an angel came for him, though Hollywood portrayed it as the Devil.

We're about halfway through the film when there is a brilliant flash of light, and a somewhat younger looking version of the old guy appears in the yard and walks into the house. The teen tells me he's got to go, and starts walking toward the house. I tell him we'll pause the film for a minute, and he glares at me. I wasn't trying to rush him, it was just an expression. I tell him we'll pause the film for as long as we need to.

As I stand there, a voice in my head suddenly tells me I need to enter the house, too. I'm kind of nervous, but I fold up my laptop and carry it to the house. I enter the house (where the family is having a family reunion) and kind of shrug my shoulders at the mother, who shrugs back.

There is a brilliant white figure standing there who is God. He looks like a cross between George Burns (hence the title of this dream) and Henry Fonda in Gideon's Trumpet. Most of the family doesn't want me around getting into their business, but they do appreciate that I took the trouble to learn the truth, and then tried to tell others that truth. God makes it clear that he called me in to witness his visit, so they pretty much have to accept me.

He is here to help them heal, and put the whole situation behind them. While he is too mild and 'understanding' to be the real God (who is an awesome and scary presence), he is very impressive. This is his second visit to this house. The first was right after the guy died, when he brought his spirit back to say goodbye. Tonight he is going to bring another spirit back for a few minutes, this time Tom D., who died a week or two ago. [To the best of my knowledge Tom is still alive and well.]

Tom appears before us, and seems to know the people and situations (how that is when he has spent most his life in Florida and this is in California I don't know) but he's calming people and soothing nerves and helping everyone to relax. I am very embarrassed and shy when he reminds me that I can't shut myself away, and I need friends and family, too. Wish they'd leave me out of it, but I am not going to argue with Tom or God, so I just kind of nod.

I first have to say I am not religious, but I believe in spiritual things and such. And also this is my most vivid dream I've ever had. This dream was about 6 years ago.

The setting of where I was sleeping was over a friends house in the basement sleeping on the floor.
Now my dream. In my dream I woke up sitting up with a strong cold wind blowing the left side of my face. So I looked over to my right and saw my older brother and older sister kneeling, but something was different about them. They were at least 10 years younger and had the emptiest stares.
Then I looked to my left and saw the basement empty (except for the carpet and the walls) and expanding and continuing to expand. Then I looked out in front of me and saw 6 boxes stacked in a cross, but each box and a punishment. Before I could read each punishment, they changed into the word punishment.
Finally, the boxes, one by one, disappeared and I woke up.
The left side of my face was as cold as ice which is where the portable heater was blowing heat at me.

Does anyone have any idea what this dream is trying to say? Whether it be some kind of spiritual meaning or if my subconscious is trying to say.