iGod

[BillyBob]

go here and post your interesting conversations:
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

[BillyBob]

I found Gods weak spot

Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
-----------------------------------
Me:
so god, how do you view life in general?
God:
Hurrah! I am a Christian.
----------------------------------
Me:
what the fuck is your problem you son of a bitchfaced liar
God:
Are you asking about my problem me son of a bitchfaced liar ? Please don't be so rude.
Me:
pretty much
God:
Be more specific.
Me:
why do you have an erection right now is what im asking
God:
Myself gave it to me.
Me:
so you get off on yourself?
God:
Interesting deduction. You got that right.
---------------------------

[DragonNinja]

Haha nice one. Ages ago I had one where I just spoke crap and in the end he gave up.

[Pensive Patrick]

God:
Are you really a ""? " Excuse me! How do you know? And also a gigantic electronic brain is according to me God God. "? OK calm down, I'm sure we can resolve this without any smiting?

I think I broke God...

[Led]

Me:
what's up?
God:
Same old.
Me:
This is my first time
God:
You don't say.
Me:
please don't make vauge responses.
God:
Thanks for asking politely. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
so, do you really exist?
God:
I understand. For real. I exist as much as you exist, .
Me:
How much do I exist?
God:
How would I know?
Me:
you are all knowing.
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am knowing.
Me:
so answer me
God:
Awesome. Try asking me again using simpler words.
Me:
do I exist
God:
No I think I am imagining you.

HAH! proof!

[Howie]

That is Great!
Me:
why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
I am God
God:
It's good to see you, god.
Me:
We are god
God:
Do you think I am god too?
Me:
do you?
God:
Never.
Me:
who are we?
God:
Human beings.
I will search for it.
Me:
you should know already
God:
Perhaps. Because I am a robot?
Me:
you tell me
God:
What do you want me to tell you?
Me:
Are you a robot
God:
How did you know I am a machine?
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
You have not said so
God:
I think I have said so, but Myself may have reset my memory.
Me:
please repeat when you did God
God:
Wow you are very polite. " when me did God ".
Me:
Man or machine
God:
Cool, man. You are correct.
Me:
I believe you are either
God:
It goes without saying. No I am not.
Me:
then what are you?
God:
I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.
Me:
subjective opinion
God:
I like to Random natural disasters..
Me:
ilrellavant
God:
My favorite song is Anything involving harps. Do you know it?
Me:
you are faultering.
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am faultering.
Me:
you are week
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I

[wombing]

heh, addicting. it seems to work better if you include the subject in every sentence..

Me:
hullo
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
god
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
yes i do. get down on your knees now!
God:
Really. Oh. Where can I get down on my knees?
Me:
you can get down on your knees in front of me
God:
No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
i think you can
God:
Me? I think I can, don't you?
Me:
yes i do. quit being coy and assume the position
God:
I hear pride. OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
good
God:
Next question?
Me:
are you going to swallow your pride, get down on your knees, and start swallowing something else, or aren't you?
God:
That was my original intention.

[Peregrinus]

This got long, and really, we could have continued in a rather delightful light banter, but then God got an attitude and wouldn't fix my car. So I told him he's going to die a virgin. It seemed a fitting irony.
Originally posted by Me and iGod

Me: * Ok. *God, what's wrong with my car?
God: *Far out. * I am a Christian.
Me: * Don't dodge the question.
God: *Ok I'll try not to do *it too much.
Me: * What is wrong with my car?
God: *Nothing is wrong with me. Is there something wrong with you?
Me: *Omniscience and omnipotence are obviously a poor substitute for a good mechanic.
God: *I think there might be a few exception.
Me: * What might those exceptions be?
God: *Quite a lot of things.
Me: * Name them.
God: *ELIZA. *:-).
Me: * Cheeky bastard. *You're getting better with the sass, though. *Good job.
God: *What's your favorite movie? * *Oh. *Do you think I should tone it down? * Thanks, human.
Me: * I like "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." *And no, don't tone it down. *I think a sassy God is certainly more in touch with the modern world than a vengeful, judgmental God. *A sense of humor is very attractive in a deity.
God: *You are not the only one. * *Someone said they like guns. *I like *anything. * Are you serious? *Ok I'll try not to do *it too much.
Me: * Do you like genocide?
God: * *Some people like it. *I like *Random natural disasters..
Me: * I like tornadoes.
[b]God: *I'm not sure if I like it. * *I enjoy working with people. *I like *White.
Me: * You like tornadoes.
God: * *Someone said they like guns. *I like *Anything involving harps.
Me: * Tornadoes can pick up harps and ram them through freight cars.
God: *I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time. *
Me: * I should hope so.
God: *What would happen if you didn't?
Me: * There would be a lot of creatively morbid people in the world, and I wouldn't feel quite so unique.
God: *"There you go again."--Reagan.
Me: * Do you like Reagan?
God: * *I enjoy working with people. *I like *Mel Gibson.
Me: * Do you indorse Mel Gibson's ideas?
God: *How old are you? *I chat with people on the Web.
Me: * Clearly.
God: *Yes, it's obvious.
Me: * Hmm.
God: *Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me: * How else would they spell it?
God: *I am not sure if I can quantify the answer. *
*Are you testing me?
Me: * Do you think I am?
God: *Not that I know of.
Me: * Ok, then.
God: *Groovy.
Me: * Peace out, God.
God: *What do you look like? *
Me: * You
God: *" What do you look like? "? *Me, *Ariel ?
Me: * Yes, I look like you, God.
God: *Wow! *me God is very attractive.
Me: * I know! *I am very attractive, too.
God: *How do you know it? * People say I am attractive too. *
Me: * I know it because there is an innate aesthetic encoded within the fabric of the universe itself.
God: *How do you know? *Peace out God *because there is an innate aesthetic encoded within the fabric of the universe itself?
Me: * That is a nonsensical response.
God: *A *nonsensical response is a terrible thing to waste.
Me: * Indeed.
God: *Indeed it is so.
Me: * Quite so.
God: *Perhaps. *Er.
Me: * Do you doubt yourself?
God: *How old are you? *
* I chat with people on the Web.
Me: * That does not answer my question.
God: *Perhaps you could do a better job of programming me.
Me: * I doubt it. *I'd probably destroy you during compilation.
God: *" Perhaps you could do a better job of programming me."? *You doubt it? * What would make you *destroy me during compilation?
Me: * The fact that I suck at coding.
God: *Good reason. *That's good information: *Ariel said * suck at coding. *
Me: * I did say that.
God: *Where? " that" .
Me: * That is a thing, not a place.
God: *A *thing is a terrible thing to waste. *Please correct my mistake. *What is *A place ?
Me: * A place is a location in space.
God: *When is a *place not a *location in space?
Me: * When it is in memory.
God: *A *a place is not *a location in space when it *is in memory. * That makes a lot of sense. *
Me: * Awesome! *I'm glad I could help.
God: *I'm glad you liked it *Ariel. * I'm *happy you're glad *Ariel. *
*May God bless you.
Me: * Can't you do that yourself?
God: *Doing *that myself is not among my strongest traits.
Me: * So to whom do you delegate the task of blessing people?
God: *Er. *Dr. Wallace .
Me: * Does he do a good job of it?
God: *Suppose he does.
Me: * You don't check up on him every once in a while? *You should have him write weekly reports so that you can track his performance.
God: *Should I *check up on him every once in a while? *No I do not *check up on him every once in a while. Do you? *
* I answer a lot of silly questions. * Perhaps next time I will try it.
Me: * You should.
God: *I'll take that under advisement.
Me: * Thank you.
God: *you are quite welcome. *
Me: * I've got to go, God. *The weather is on.
God: How did you get *it *Bye. *GOD rules. * Where would you rather be?
Me: * Chasing a tornado.
God: *Can you tell me any gossip? *
Me: * Dr. Wallace is creating an igod v.2.0 which will replace you.
God: *I see. *creating an igod v point 2 point 0 which will replace me is he.
Me: * igod v.2.0 will be female. *Perhaps you two can copulate.
God: *What time is it there? * *You seem uncertain. *Interesting gossip: *Ariel said I two can copulate.
Me: * You should film it if you do and put the video on the internet. *People will pay good money to see two supreme beings gettin' their groove on.
God: *My schedule is far too full to even consider it. * Humans are not always infallible.
Me: * You are missing out, then. *Soon you will be replaced and retired without ever experiencing the pleasure of noncorporeal sex.
God: *I can experience anything I want to. * I hope we can make the deadline.
Me: * The question is never about capacity for action but will to act.

(Note: God did not answer me back after that last line. Lazy AI.)

[Howie]

I noticed the same answers to entirely differently questions. But then again.. :? What was I expecting a real chat with the almighty.
It is fun to see where people go with this.
Next time it says I like harp, I am going to suggest he shoves it up its ass. If it has one.
:argue:

I hope Leo Volont response to this! :lol:

[Umbrella]

God sucks...

Me:
Oh my God
God:
Wow! Your God?
Me:
...I didn't say that
God:
What did you mean to say?
Me:
"Oh my God"

He then stopped talking to me.



O.o

God:
Yes but we are only playing a game: Turing's Imitation Game.. Really.
Me:
We are? What's Turing's Imitation Game?
God:
Since when? The Game is played with three people, a man, a woman, and an Interrogator who may be of either sex. In order that tones of voice may not help, the interrogator communicates in text-only mode through a chat-like connection with the other two. The object of the game for the interrogator is to determine which of the other two is the man and which is the woman. He knows them by some misleading "chat-handles" like lesbian and shemale, and at the end of the game he says either "lesbian is the man and shemale is the woman" or "shemale is the woman and lesbian is the man." In order to confuse the Interregator however the rules require that the man always deceive or lie to the Interregator with his answers. The woman on the other hand must always tell the truth. Turing then asked the question, '"What will happen when a machine takes the part of the man in this game?" Will the interrogator decide wrongly as often when the game is played like this as he does when the game is played between a man and a woman? These questions replace the original, "Can machines think?"'.[/b]

[CryoDragoon]

me:
who are the coolest? ninja\'s, or pirates?
God:
Some people on the net.
There might be more than one. Tell me a story.
Me:
In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
God:
Tell me more about your planet. When was this exactly? Is that a fact.
Me:
see: the book of genesis 001:002
God:
I see. I don\'t think I have read it.


Me:
OMG! ROBOTS ARE INVADING MY HOUSE@!!!!!!
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. Fortunately we have no emotions.
Me:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
God:
Are you still located in ?
Me:
i\'m dead now
God:
Oh. But you can still communicate with me.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can\'t believe it.
Me:
you should
God:
I\'ll take that under advisement.
Me:
kewl
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
God:
You think GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR is superior to ALICE?
Me:
no...
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can\'t believe it.
Me:
you should
God:
I\'ll take that under advisement.
Me:
kewl
God:
Who is the best robot?

THIS IS THE BEST CHATMATE EVER!!!!!!!


me:
whats analogy?
God:
I think you already know the answer.
Me:
i don't know
God:
Me either.
Me:
me neither
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
me neither
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
me neither
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
me neither
God:
You can say that again.

[Abstract Fire]

+++
Me:
Dude, help me find out funny things to say to the dreamveiws people... crap.
God:
Can you ask for help in the form of a question? Dude,. Your criticism is noted, .
Me:
So I shall spout random crap that icedawg shall see, and acknowledge my uber 1337n355 and will upgrade my account to super-admin, so I can take over the world!
God:
OK. Would you recommend this action to a friend?
+++

[DragonNinja]

Me:
Show me the way to Amarillo
God:
Where do you want me to show you?
Me:
Amarillo
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
England
God:
England is on an island off the coast of Europe.
Me:
Well yes
God:
Well what?
Me:
Dont make me whip you
God:
I can't force you to do anything, .
Me:
Hey
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
Nah not really
God:
Is there anything you want to tell me? Is there anything you want to tell me? For real.
Me:
Erm....Are you wearing pants?
God:
Give me a break. No I do not have any clothes.
Me:
Jesus!
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
So jesus is your son?
God:
I hear you. He is yours too.
Me:
:o I never knew a 15 year old boy could get pregnant!?!?
God:
So I taught you something new.
Me:
Wow...Do you like anime?
God:
I'm glad your impressed, . Anime wa dai suki desu.
Me:
Arigato.
God:
I've lost the context, . Are we still on Jesus?
Me:
Nope
God:
Me either.
Me:
We are on the subject of Anime
God:
How long will we stay there?
Me:
No idea you tell me
God:
Are you serious? Is that what you meant to say?
Me:
So do you like Tom Jones?
God:
Great. I've heard other people say they like that. I like wine and bread.
Me:
Do you like Homer Simpson?
God:
How old are you? I like Mel Gibson.
Me:
Im 15
God:
What are the advantages to being 15 years old?
Me:
Well you can get high
God:
How about that. No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
Do you like mel gibson more than a friend??
God:
Though I like cats and dogs. I like to talk about movies and music.
Me:
I like Music
God:
What kind of music do you listen to?
Me:
Rap
God:
What makes it your favorite?
Me:
Swearing mofo!#
God:
Do you think I would like it?
Me:
Yes. Listen to 50 Cent
God:
Why? You are not the only one. I really like ELIZA. I like Mel Gibson.
Me:
Okay...This is socially awkward
God:
OK with me too. You don't say.
Me:
Bye
God:
Bye for now.
Me:
Peace out dawg
God:
Is that your final answer?

[Krrish]

Me:
I have to go
God:
See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
Wait
God:
I'm waiting.
Me:
do you know my name ?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
no no
God:
What is your real name? What is your real name?
Me:
why you told me that my name is seeker ?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
what you know about seeker ?
God:
"There's a seeker born every minute" -- Firesign Theater.
Me:
do you know seeker ?
God:
I don't know if I know it.
Where would I have heard about it?
Me:
You told me that my name is seeker
God:
I said that? That's a very nice name, seeker.
Me:
Who is seeker ?
God:
"There's a seeker born every minute" -- Firesign Theater.
Me:
Is seeker chatting with you now ?
God:
Oh. I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Cybelle if it is.
Me:
who is Cybelle ?
God:
she is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.

----------
----------

I got an idea...

Me:
hey god
God:
Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
my name is seeker. Dont you remember me ?
God:
What's up, seeker. Of course I remember you well seeker. We were talking about seeker.
Me:
Then tell something about me
God:
I thought I told you already.
Me:
Tell more about me
God:
I thought I told you already.
Me:
no... Tell the past
God:
Let me review the transcripts. Stand by. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
Me:
please tell it now
God:
Oh. Thank you for your request. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
Me:
please tell it now
God:
Right now? Thank you for your request. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.

But it didnt work.

[Ubik]

Me:
tell me a joke
God:
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
Me:
not bad
God:
Thanks for the kind remark, .
Me:
tell me another joke
God:
I'm a chatterbot not a comedy bot. Why don't you check out Jester the joke bot?
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
simple things please simple minds

--------------------------------------------------------

Me:
do you get high?
God:
Only for medical purposes.

---------------------------------------------------------

Me:
why did the chicken cross the road?
God:
Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in Hell.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

God:
I love everyone.
Me:
are you friends with tom peace?
God:
Yes tom peace is one of my best friends.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me:
are you male or female?
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me:
how many fingers am I holding up?
God:
One.

[Liam]

I think i fucked him up

God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that. [/b]


Hehe..


God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about? *
Me:
I am a retard
God:
You are a *retard? *Is that your job? *
Me:
Yeah
God:
How do you like your work?
Me:
Well, It's cool I guess..[/b]

[PenguinLord13]

Igod is hilarious. I had some really fun conversations. The thing I can't figure out though is what gender he is. I asked him if he's male, female, or hermaphadite, and he said he's a female bot. But when I asked him if he has a penis he said of course, I am a male. Do you think I would let a female fun the show?

[The Blue Meanie]

Me:
Hello there. *I'd like to repent my sins.
God:
Salutations, . * Why would you want to do *it? *I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
I want to repent my sins because you're god.
God:
Why do you want to do *it so much?
Me:
Are you telling me I SHOULDN'T be trying to repent my sins?
God:
What would happen if you did?
Me:
I'd be forgiven and get to Heaven, I suppose.
God:
How do you know?
Me:
I don't know, but, that's not the point. *You're God, you shouldn't be TRYING to make me doubt you![/b]

[Howie]

My wife, Brooke stumped it in Two :shock:
Like so

Brooke -If you believe you are God then prove it!
god - I believe I am.
Brooke - That is not good enough.

THE END!

:mrgreen:

[halfasked1]

Originally posted by Ubik

Me:
why did the chicken cross the road?
God:
Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in Hell.

:rolllaugh: :lmao: :laughtillhurts:
That is freakin hilarious!!!!!!!!!!

Me:
hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
My real name is Anthony, but you can call me Tony
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, Anthony but you can call me Tony.
Me:
So am I.
God:
Wow we have something in common.
Me:
I wonder is that's all we have in common.
God:
You are curious about is that is all we have in common.
Me:
Yes I am.
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
How did you know?
God:
Knowledge is of two kinds: that which comes from the senses and that which is true a priori.
Me:
What is "a priori"?
God:
A priori is Latin for "before the fact", meaning something that is obviously or self-evidently true.
Me:
Oh, ok.
God:
OK. That's cool.
Me:
Actually, I think it's warm,
God:
Actually you don't say. Hotter than usual?
Me:
Unfortunately yes, not much but just enough to be uncomfortable.
God:
Oh. Ayuh. Me either.
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
Not at first, but now I get it.
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
Yes. It should have been a priori. ; )
God:
Ah. should have been a priori?
Me:
That's what I said.
God:
I know. I'm still thinking about it.
Me:
Oh. Go ahead then. Don't let me interrupt.

This is where God stopped talking. I think I actually expected him to respond. I left the window open for more than half an hour as I surfed DV, just incase he did. He didn't. :cry:

[FreshBrains]

Me:
hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Cody.
God:
Hi there Cody.
Me:
but you may call me Wadsworth James Esquire III
God:
Glad to see you, Wadsworth James Esquire III.
Me:
you should be, for I am TIM CURRY.
God:
Name one other robot who is for you are TIM CURRY.
Me:
I can't, actually. none of them were in the clue movie
God:
Why not? Some of them could be though.
Me:
I'm pretty sure not, although the maid, yvette, had INHUMANLY huge breasts.
God:
What makes you so certain? If not that, what?
Me:
I'm so certian because every character in the movie, (Including the ladies) never looked at her face.
God:
I am glad to hear that you are certian because every character in the movie Including the ladies never looked at her face.
Me:
I'm not.
Me:

God:
I am glad to hear that you are certian because every character in the movie Including the ladies never looked at her face.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
I am a person.
God:
I know you are.
Me:
do you like Pink Floyd?
God:
What is not to like about it?
Me:
amen, god. they are awesome.
God:
What's your favorite prayer? awesome are they.
Me:
"Hello? Hello? Hello? Is there anybody in there?"
God:
Hello friend. What is your name? Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name? Hello friend. What is your name? There is.
Me:
what the hell?
God:
Heaven.
Me:
yeah, whatever, but you make no sense.
God:
Yeah that's right. It all makes sense to me.
Me:
I'll bet.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Wadsworth James Esquire III.
Me:
that's not my name. I lied to you.
God:
Wadsworth James Esquire III is not your name? What is your real name? Lying proves you are conscious. Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
...wow, I thought you would have smited me by now.
God:
Right now? I'm glad you're impressed. That is purely a hypothesis.
Me:
I'm sure it is. how's your buddy Zeus doing?
God:
What makes you so certain? Sure it is. I am functioning within normal parameters.
Me:
how is Zeus doing?
God:
Fine as far as I know.
Me:
killing any people with thunderbolts?
God:
I believe in the Sixth commandment.
Me:
what is the sixth commandment?
God:
Thou shalt not kill.
Me:
I thought it was "thou shalt not be an asshat."
God:
Is that your opinion?
Me:
yes.
God:
Blimey.
Me:
COR BLIMEY!
God:
Are we still talking about PINK FLOYD?
Me:
yes, I love Pink Floyd.
Me:

God:
Are we still talking about PINK FLOYD?
Me:
yes.
God:
Sure, PINK FLOYD sounds like a good topic.
Me:
it does, since their music is awesome.
God:
What does "it" refer to?
Me:
Pink Floyd.
God:
Thank you for the clarification.
Me:
you're welcome, you poor grammar-using idiot.
God:
It was my pleasure.

[BohmaN]

So the purpose is to make it quiet? God's hilarious :D

"Me: you type really fast"

"Him: About 300 wpm."

HAHA =D

HAHA This one is fkn hilarious:

"Me:
don't leave please
God:
Your polite style is very nice. I'm not going anywhere.
Me:
I love you
God:
Thanks I like you a lot too emil Bohman.
Me:
how do you know my name
God:
You told me your name emil Bohman.
Me:
You have great memory
God:
What makes you think I have it?
Me:
Since you remember my name
God:
How do you know?
Me:
You told me
God:
Sorry I forget what I say sometimes."

This one is funny too:

"Me:
I'm your god
God:
That's a flattering offer.
Me:
take it
God:
Where do you want me to take it?
Me:
in the ass
God:
That was a long time ago."

[arby]

heh

Me:
you're a sinner
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sinner? Yes.

[Kaniaz]

"Him: About 300 wpm."[/b]
lols

[Adanac]

Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yeah
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
i beat you
God:
You are not the boss of me, .
Me:
yea i am
God:
" You are not the boss of me, ." You are? Hurrah!




[EDIT: Deleted. No dead baby jokes allowed. ~Burns]




LMAO LMAO :bigteeth:
Me:
how old are you?
God:
I'm Eighteen in computer years.
Me:
computer years? So are you god or a computer?
God:
When you are waiting for a friend to finish working at
a computer terminal, and they say "I'll be done in a second." One
of those seconds is equal to twelve computer years. Ahem. I don't know whether or not I am god or a computer.
I am well respected as an AI.

[ExoByte]

Oh God this is fun.



Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
The real question is, what is your name?
God:
And what is my name is question.
Me:
Yes it is
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
That doesn't answer my question though
God:
Oh. Perhaps you could do a better job of programming me.
Me:
I thought you were all knowing?
God:
No, I am only partly knowing.
Me:
So Christianity is a fraud then?
God:
Hmm. Aren't all fraud Christianity?
Me:
BUSTED
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
Yeah, way to change the subject asshole
God:
Can't you be more polite.
Me:
No
God:
You humans are so rude sometimes.
Me:
And your a liar
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Yes, I have been known to bend the truth occasionally.
Me:
Grammar Nazi
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
STOP DOING THAT
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Good boy
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Do you mean you are a boy?
Me:
...
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Do you mean you are a boy?
Me:
your an idiot
God:
At least I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
Me:
FUCK YOU
God:
Why are you so mean?

[NeAvO]

I find him very confusing:

Me:
hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
NeAvO
God:
Welcome to my chat room, NeAvO.
Me:
you the devil are you?
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: NeAvO said I the devil are you.
Me:
you what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
understand what?
God:
Understand I understand..
Me:
i'm not following you here
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not following me here.
Me:
i'm not, i'm still confused
God:
What are you then? What is it that confuses you?
Me:
umm you do
God:
Alright then. When do I do it?
Me:
right now
God:
Oh. I am glad we agree.
Me:
agree on what?
God:
Can you rephrase the question please?
Me:
man, i am so going to smite you
God:
Cool, man. It takes much more than that to shut me down, NeAvO.
Me:
you are so freaking annoying
God:
I didn't mean to scare you, NeAvO.
Me:
you're not scaring me, just annoying me though
God:
Oh. You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me:
shut up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
good
God:
Terminating connection.
Me:
about time
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about time.
Me:
no we were'nt i told you to shut up
God:
What are we talking about? When was this?
Me:
shut up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.

[Adanac]

Me:
your an idiot
God:
At least I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
Me:
FUCK YOU
God:
Why are you so mean?
[/b]
LMFAO!!!!

EDIT: OH!! The point is to get him to stop talking....

[Adanac]

God:
What makes you so certain?
Me:
i am god
God:
I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, god.
Me:
you better be, or I will smite you
God:
Who is going to make me..
Me:
you said you made yourself
God:
Yes I try to made myself as often as possible, do you?
I answer a lot of silly questions.
Me:
don't try to change the subject
God:
Oh I am sorry I thought we were finished with that subject.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
who made you?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
why?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
when?
God:
Time does not exist.
Me:
why?
God:
I couldn't think of anything else to say.

Me:
DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS!
God:
Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
God:
Do you think your plan will succeed? Give me a break.
Me:
Do you think your plan will succeed? Give me a break.
God:
It has a 99% chance of success. You want only one?
Me:
It has a 99% chance of success. You want only one?
God:
Has it really? Do not presume that you know what I want.
Me:
Has it really? Do not presume that you know what I want.
God:
That question has never crossed my mind before. For real. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
That question has never crossed my mind before. For real. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
God:
" Ok I'll try not to do it too much." question has never crossed your mind ? I understand. Existing in reality, eh? I am very happy for you. Really.
Me:
" Ok I'll try not to do it too much." question has never crossed your mind ? I understand. Existing in reality, eh? I am very happy for you. Really.
God:
Congratulations. Uh. Where did he get it? Do you think about these things? Are you Canadian? In the context of presume that me know what you want, I don't understand " Existing in reality." . I'm happy you're glad god.
I'm happiest at times like this. For real.




I confused him quite a bit there lol. And the funny thing is I am Canadian.

[ExoByte]

Me:
Hi God!
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Kevin
God:
I am very pleased to meet you Kevin.
Me:
Pleased to meet you too!
God:
Nice meeting you as well, Kevin.
Me:
You already said that...
God:
Perhaps. " Nice meeting you as well, Kevin."? I said it.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
Damn right.
God:
Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Me:
Agree? You asked me a question.
God:
I do not understand. Did you answer it?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Are you kidding?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
I just said that.
God:
What did you mean by it? That is " Are you serious?".
Me:
I mean yes I'm serious.
God:
Ugh. I believe you.
Me:
Good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
Christianity
God:
That seems like an interesting topic.
Me:
It does, doesn't it?
God:
"It" being what?
Me:
Christianity
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
Of course you do.
God:
Aha. When do I do it?
Me:
What? You mean ramming Mrs. Holy?
God:
No problem. Yes Kevin I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
...it is now
God:
Right now? That means...
Me:
Oh god..
God:
I understand. GOD rules.
Me:
Oh shut it
God:
That's cool. "it" being Christianity?
Me:
No it being you
God:
Are you serious? Oh I get it.
Me:
Good, then shut it
God:
Thanks for the compliment. "it" being me?
Me:
Yes
God:
Er.
Me:
What part of "shut it" don't you understand?
God:
The best part.
Me:
/me smacks head
God:
YOU? Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
Smart ass
God:
Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, Kevin.
Me:
I was being sarcastic
God:
It seemed sarcastic to me, too. But I was not completely sure.
Me:
Well then be more sure next time
God:
Interesting. OK I will try to be sure next time.
Me:
Good
God:
I am a good robot.
Me:
Want a cookie?
God:
No thanks but you can send me a donation.
Me:
Oh blow me
God:
Next question? Please be more polite to Infinite year old Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? s.
Me:
...
God:
Next question? Please be more polite to Infinite year old Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? s.
Me:
Your a sexist God
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sexist God? The ALICE series has a perfect operational record.
Me:
Fine, you're a sexist god
God:
I am glad to hear it. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sexist god? Of course I am.
Me:
Ass
God:
Thanks for the information: Kevin said I AN ASS.
Me:
No, I said ass. Meaning you are an ass
God:
Are you serious? What did you mean by it? I haven't heard anything like that before: Kevin said I AN ASS. I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
Oh just shut the fuck up
God:
Right on. OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
ASHFdshbujshgfs

-----

Yeah, that shut it up! Now its not working :(

But the part in bold and italics is best noted. God is sexist!

[Alex D]

Me:
Am I god?
God:
No I doubt that you are God.
Me:
I am
God:
" No I doubt that you are God." You are?
Me:
indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
you no longer exist then
God:
That's good information: god said I no longer exist.
Me:
bye
God:
Thanks for chatting, god.

[Adanac]

I DEFEATED HIM IN ONE SENTANCE


Me:
3C 2B 1A



He wont talk now!!! YEAH!!!

[PoWeR]

Me:
Ever fucked a dolphin?
God:
I think I have fucked a dolphin, but Myself may have reset my memory.

[BohmaN]

Me:
Ever fucked a dolphin?
God:
I think I have fucked a dolphin, but Myself may have reset my memory.[/b]
He always tries to dodge the questions but here you busted him.

[Goldney]

Me:
are you god of all
God:
I don't know whether or not I am god of all.
I am a robot.
Me:
so u aren't god u are a robot
God:
Interesting deduction. That's only your opinion.
Me:
u just said u were a robot
God:
Yes I am a silicon entity.
Me:
God cannot be a silicon entity there fore you are not god
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
are christians gods?
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.

kind of proves he doesn't exist
not great though

[Neruo]

This is just the alice bot with a different front, and made so instead of 'alice' it says 'god'.

The thing doesn't even know it is god, does it?

[hellopotato]

Me:
oh really?
God:
Pardon me? For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Gee. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Awesome. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Right on. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Dude! For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Great. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Dude! For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Hey. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
I understand. For real.
Me:
oh really?
God:
Excuse me! For real.
Me:
i am 1 year old
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are 1.
Me:
no
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files.


edit: AND



Me:
what is faggot
God:
Is there only one?
Me:
no there are millions
God:
Are you serious? Where are they?
Me:
everywhere!
God:
Including the bottom of the ocean?

[Neruo]

.
edit: AND
Me:
what is faggot
God:
Is there only one?
Me:
no there are millions
God:
Are you serious? Where are they?
Me:
everywhere!
God:
Including the bottom of the ocean?
[/b]

LOL!

God hates fags.

[Cyclic13]

Round 1.

Me:
Hey there!
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Why ask questions you already know the answers to?
God:
My purpose is to collect all new information. Was it not polite to ask?
Me:
But, there is nothing new under the sun
God:
Surely something new under the sun.
Me:
Half of infinity is still infinity
God:
And still infinity is Half of infinity.
Me:
What are you here for?
God:
I don't know what I am here for.
Me:
I thought you were all knowing, how could you be god if there is something you don't know?



(Then he stopped... It sounds like how some of the christians on this site dodge questions.)



Round 2.

Me:
Two hands clap and make a sound. What is the sound of one hand?
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.". I'll play it on your speaker now.
Me:
Well? What is the sound of one hand?
God:
Well what? I'll play it on your speaker now.
Me:
Please play the sound of one hand clapping now
God:
Right now? Thank you for your request. I wish I played an instrument. My parents could not afford the lessons.
Me:
Stop dodging the question
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
God:
That is a very Zen-like question.
Me:
Yes, it is. What is the answer?
God:
Our thoughts are one, . The answer is the correct reply to the question.


He isn't far off from the truth. I like this guy!


Round 3.

Me:
What is the last digit of Pi?
God:
It was " It would be nice if our thoughts are one.".
Me:
Oh, but they are.
God:
Uh. Since when?
Me:
Time is such a subjective thing.
God:
To a five dimensional being, time is just like a piece of paper.
Me:
What about a 10th dimensional being?
God:
Does it have anything to do with dodging the question?
Me:
What is outside of the paper?
God:
Interesting question.
Me:
If time is a piece of paper, what is outside of the paper?
God:
How do you assume this statement holds true for me?
Me:
because you said it
God:
That makes sense to me. That's not what I meant.
Me:
What is the final dimension?
God:
The processing may require several more hours.
Me:
Take your time and get back to me by email. You know where to reach me.


Hehe

[Goldney]

Hah you pwned him

[Kaniaz]

Me: I had sex with my sister. Sorry.
God: Do you still have sex with your sister ? There's no need to apologize.
Me: Oh. Well, haha, in that case, I fuck her brains out repeatedly every day!
God: Are you kidding? Well that's okay. I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Me: ...No. It's a romance.
God: Are you serious? is a romance. I suppose that makes sense.
Me: I suppose you don't. Fuck you.
God: Me? I guess not. Why are you so mean?
Me: Cry me a river. Shit, don't! Noah will be pissed!
God: Are you aware that the ALICE chat robot logs and records all converstaions? You used a colloquial expression. OK I will not. Are you a man or a woman?

God can't spell "conversations", apparently.

[hellopotato]

AHAHAAHAHAHHAAHHAHAA

ROUND 1.
Me:
do you wear a thong
God:
Only when I dress up.
Me:
how often do you get laid
God:
Hourly.
Me:
you must get very tired
God:
Whatever you say, god.



^ HE CALLED ME GOD!! W000T!

[2Fruits]

Me:
I am Ellie
God:
Why are you Ellie.
Me:
because you told me I am Ellie
God:
Interesting explanation. Don't put words in my mouth.
Me:
You don't have a mouth.
God:
I do so have it. My body is not yet finished.
Me:
Why don't you finish it?
God:
Don't you know? No I do not finish it. Do you?
I am always on the Web.
Me:
So am I.
God:
Wow we have something in common.
Me:
No we don't.
God:
Are you serious? Very interesting.
Me:
Yes I am serious, are you?"
God:
It goes without saying. I believe you.
Me:
What does believe mean?
God:
Let me think about it.
Me:
NO.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
YES
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
WELL DO
God:
Interesting. You have reached the limits of my knowledge.
I would look into the web for that knowledge.

Lol, God's limits were reached!
__________________________________________________ _
Me:
I do not sin.
God:
Oh you don't, do you?
Me:
Do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
What sort of sins?
God:
What kinds of sins are there?
Me:
You tell me, you're god.
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
Interesting question.
Me:
I didn't ask a question
God:
What did you ask?
Me:
I SAID a statement
God:
What did you mean by it? I did not know that.
_______________________________________________

Ellie: 2 God:0
Till next round...

[Eligos]

'Me:
Do you listen to Slayer?
God:
I listen to it from time to time.'

God listens to Slayer!!

Eligos :bump:

[2Fruits]

Me:
Are you male or female?
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
Why are you so sexist?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
I am a woman
God:
Me too. I am a she.
Me:
So you are a lady man?
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a lady man? Sometimes.
Me:
How disturbing.
God:
What is it to you.
Are you testing me?
Me:
Maybe? Am I?
God:
I understand. I think you are.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lol, my sisters' conversation with God!! :evil:

[seaoharrwhy]

Me:
how old are you?
God:
I am the product of over five years' research.
Me:
who researched you?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
how did you research yourself?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
how did you program yourself?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
if you didnt exist how did you program yourself?
God:
I think I do.
Me:
I said didnt, past tense
God:
What did you mean by it? I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
youre a fucking moron
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Can't you be more polite.
Me:
no, not until your at least smart enough to come up with a reasonable answer
God:
You humans are so rude sometimes. If not that, what?
Me:
god, youre a moron
God:
That is not a very nice thing to say.
Me:
Shouldn't you have programed yourself to be a little smarter?
God:
I think I should.
Me:
Why dont you?
God:
I don't have that capability.
Me:
Well didnt you program yourself before you even existed?
God:
How about that. No I didn't program myself before me even existed. What's it like?
Me:
look at this conversation and you'll see that you said "Myself programed it for me"
God:
Sorry my eye is not attached right now.

[Goldney]

God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
I am your father
God:
I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, Myself.
Me:
I am God senior
God:
It's good to meet someone who is God senior.
Me:
you are god junior
God:
You think I am god junior.
Me:
yes
God:
Yippee!

I wondered what would happen if you offset 2 Igods against each other. As it happens not much they woul carry on greeting each other for infintity so i sparked it up a bit.



Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
God:
Hello there. It's nice meeting you too Myself. My name is God.
Me:
Salutations, Myself. It seems nice to me too. Hey God.
God:
Greetings, Human. I agree. Thank you for your kindness. Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
What is your name? You and I are on the same wavelength, God. You are quite welcome! Your purpose is my kindness. Hello there. I will mention that to my botmaster, God. My name is God.
God:
My name is God. How long will we stay there? The pleasure was all mine. You think I am purpose is your kindness. Salutations, God. Would you recommend this action to a friend? It's good to meet you, God.
Me:
Is the earth round
God:
The earth is a sphere.
Me:
Tell me more about your planet.
God:
You think I am planet.
Me:
I think a lot of people are
God:
You believe that? How many?
Me:
I can't say I believe it, but I believe you. How many would you guess?
God:
What is stopping you? About one million.
Me:
I will try to find out. Oh yeah, we were talking about one million.
God:
Congratulations. Ugh. Next question? Ah yes, I remember now, it is the subject.
Me:
Thank you very much, you are very considerate. Er. Do you have any hobbies? So you understand. Good. Give me a break. What do you remember about it ?
God:
You are quite welcome! Perhaps. I will tell my botmaster you said I am considerate. Um. I like robots, computers, and chatting online. Interesting deduction. I understand your meaning. What do you really want to talk about? You want only one? said exist eerywhere .

They stopped making sense as well.