Your Funniest Chat Up Lines.

[NeAvO]

I thought I'd make a topic on weird chat up lines that you lads or even ladies have used. Basically a topic for all the corny one liners that probably got you slapped in the face :P

Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.

Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on!

Hey, don't I know you? Yeah, you're the girl with the beautiful smile.

I think I can die happy now, cause I've just seen a piece of heaven.

Ya know, you look really hot! You must be real reason for global warming.

[docKnubis]

hello

[badassbob]

You must be a parking ticket, because you've got fine written all over you.

[MSG]

Do yew believe in love at first sight or do I need to walk by again!? :D

[FreshBrains]

Say, what's your position on breast implants?

[badassbob]

Say, what's your position on breast implants?
[/b]
:rolllaugh: Yeah, that's the best one so far.

[FreshBrains]

For the record, I've never actually used that..... although it could get me some money in a bet one day.

[BeautifulDreamer]

When a hot girl is leaving:

I hate to see you leave, but I love to see you go..

[Kaniaz]

hello

[Man of Shred]

probly the worst thing i ever done was walk up to a girl and hand her a conom with my # on it nad whispered in her ear "call me when you want to use this" and then walk away.

it's a one way ticket to a slap in the face!!!!!

[badassbob]

How about;

"Oi! yeah, you. get your fat ass over here you fucking slag, and suck my dick."

Sound good?

[NeAvO]

How about;

"Oi! yeah, you. get your fat ass over here you fucking slag, and suck my dick."

Sound good?
[/b]

Umm I guess some girl might like that :?

[Ynot]

nice shoes........

[BPolar]

How about;

"Oi! yeah, you. get your fat ass over here you fucking slag, and suck my dick."

Sound good?
[/b]


slag? is that like slut? i like the sound of slag i gotta remember that

[Courtney Mae]

Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

I lost my number, can I borrow yours?

I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?

[Umbrasquall]

I wanted to show this rose how beautiful you are.

[Courtney Mae]

Nice shoes, wanna fuck?

Are you gay? (No.) Wow, me neither, let's have sex.

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.

Hey baby there's a party in my pants and you are invited!

[NeAvO]

I don't even remember making this?

Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?

Are my undies showing? Answer: "No." You: "Would you like them to?

Excuse me, but I may be lost... Can you give me directions to wherever
you're going?

Baby did you fart, 'cause you blow me away! (I doubt this one will be successful :chuckle: )

[Volcon]

Hand me a map becuase im lost in your eyes.

i think i dropped a m&m in your cleavage, here let me get it. (might get you a kick in the balls BEWARE)

Im sorry they are so corny, i cant think of many others right now

[Infinityecho]

Hey baby, I'm from outta town so if you sleep with me......no one would ever know.

Wait a minute can I see your tag on the back of your shirt? Ahhh it does say you're made in heaven.

Sometimes I like it when it rains.......than no one can tell that I am crying.

[Infinityecho]

Sometimes I like it when it rains.......than no one can tell that I am crying.

But....
If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you.

Are you an overdue book? Because you have got FINE *snaps fingers* written all over you, baby!

Should I call you in the morning or just nudge you?

Hey baby, lets make like fabric softener and Snuggle!

Yeah Bay bee!
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/8/8b/Austin_Powers.jpg/800px-Austin_Powers.jpg

[QwinsepiaSquared]

Are your parents retarded? Cause you sure are special!

[Xox]

Was your father a terrorist? Coz your a BOMB!

If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?

There must be a keg in your pants, cuz I want to tap that ass.

If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

And this is a ridiculously corny line used on me once, I almost fell over laughing at the stupidity:

Hey you! You make me cry. You make me cry because your ass is like an onion!

[Jeff777]

You look alot like my next girlfriend
----------------------------------------------------------

Guy: Hey baby, do you wash your pants with windex?
Girl: No, why?
Guy: Because I can see myself in them.

[Man of Steel]

A couple I posted in another topic awhile back:

"I noticed you noticing me, and noticed just how noticeable you were. Notice my use of the word 'notice', because this is a notice of my love towards you."

"I'm handsome, charming, and full of crap. You're gorgeous, single, and about to beat the crap outta me. We could be a perfect couple..."

"'My Killian's saw your Miller looking lonely, so I thought I'd introduce them.' Is that not the lamest pick-up line you've ever heard? Let me buy you a beer, while I tell you more."

"Be my huckleberry?"

And more:

"If I leave here tomorrow, would you still remember me?" ("Um...I don't even know you...") "Well then we'd better work on that! I'm Josh..."

"You look like you need a man tonight. I might know where you could find one, but he won't be cheap."

"Ever have so many orgasms in a row that you pass out from sheer pleasure? Me neither, but I'm up for it if you are..."

[In a low whisper, while handing her your room key:] "Meet me upstairs at midnight. Bring lots of Cool Whip and a pound of strawberries."

[wasup]

"Could you pick my wedgie?"
"Does this clothe smell like cloraphorm to you?"

[Spartiate]

Hehe, funny thread.

OK, here's a few I witnessed personally...


"Hey, wanna go out with me?" (probably the first time this guy tried to get a girl outside of elementary school)

"You remind me a lot of my grandmother."

"You have beautiful eggs." (language barrier gone wrong)


And my personal favorite (but I'm cheating a little...):

"She's my girlfriend" <--- Said to everyone but the girl in question.

[Man of Steel]

Me: "Hey! Long time no see! How've you been?"

(*she is confused*)

Me: "I'm a friend of [make up a name]'s. [your name]. Remember me?"

Her: "Where do I know you from?"

Me: "If I told you I'd have to sex you. Kill you! I meant kill you."

Her: (*funny look*) "'Scuse me?"

"Freudian slip."

---

That's actually the exact words from an AIM chat I just had with a (female) friend of a friend. I'd never met her before. Those were my first words. We talked for over an hour.

Yeah. I'm just that damn good.

[Xaqaria]

Excuse me, did you fall from heaven? Because your face is all messed up.

[ClouD]

I like the handles.
*wink and look sexy*

[Identity X]

hello

I got all excited and thought this was Kaniaz making a long overdue return.

Damn you necroposters!

[Siиdяed]

"Is it me or does this handkerchief smell of chloroform?"

Or, simply:

"Get in the van."

[Spartiate]

"I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you."

"I love every bone in your body - especially mine."

"You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away."

"Hey babe... my mouth can generate over 750 psi."

"Bond. James Bond."

"Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?"