How close am i?

[sotto123]

The last few nights I've been trying to wild. I immediately get to a stage where my head feels heavy and sort of feels like it is spinning and my eyes seem to force themselves very tightly shut (is this normal?) and sometimes i get rem. when i say immediately i mean in about 30 secs? What stage am I at. I think I get to the transition stage but I always seem to stay awake, I open my eyes to do a reality check but I am still awake.

Any help would be appreciated