Remember that text message you shouldn't have sent last night?

[High Hunter]

They do! (http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/)

This site is hilarious! Post your favorites ;)

Here are a few of mine, so far:

(212): dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
(1-212): idk but i think it had a face

(512): You surviving the open bar?
(1-512): Super asto ex polenta omaha botad

(214): dude. I'm so drunk.
(972): pete, this is bryce's mom
(214): I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
(972): pete, this is still bryce's mom

(212): so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."

(678): why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
(770): I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle

(631): My cock was attacked by outdoor plants

(734): just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"

(508): hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
(214): ok, stay where you are, be there soon

[High Hunter]

Some more:

(650): oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'

(647): hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.

(301): I'm sorry my penis didn't work

(215): Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.

(301): Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.

[Adam]

Oooooh dear! I have some on my phone sounding similar to these...

[Chris182t]

(213): Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.

(805): My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.

(417): No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times

haha

[guitarboy]

(405): I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
(1-405): Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
(860): oh good, I think they're gone
(215): the painters?
(860): my herpes
(303): Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
(630): her vagine was all disorganized.

(916): Hey you
(732): You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
(513): Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
(513): I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
(818): On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Hehe.

[hellohihello]

Ooooh! This is like fmylife.com I have a new website to search for lulz! Thanks

[tommo]

(310): Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
(770): b/c u have herpes
(310): No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.

(301): Define "chronic" masturbator.

(504): i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
(fuck I hate that fake shit lol)

(302): Who goes to Church hungover
(717): Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk

(207): If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.

(843): Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
(haha AWESOME!)

(816): She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.

(626): i need an iv and a liver transplant

(818): he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.

(843): Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.

And LOL @ that one
(214): dude. I'm so drunk.
(972): pete, this is bryce's mom
(214): I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
(972): pete, this is still bryce's mom
Funny on two levels when you think about it.