Best Smart A$$ Answers Of 2007

**Clairity** · 11-13-2007 10:11 AM

BEST SMART A$$ ANSWERS OF 2007!!

SMART A$$ ANSWER #6:
It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline.
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
"What are my choices?" John asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.

SMART A$$ ANSWER #5:
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said,
"Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

SMART A$$ ANSWER #4:
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

SMART A$$ ANSWER #3:
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window.
"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

SMART A$$ ANSWER #2:
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead."
Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up.
The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

SMART A$$ ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2007:
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart-a$$ guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering.
When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says,
"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

**NeAvO** · 11-13-2007 10:16 AM

I'm suprise I'm not listed in there

I liked the last one, are they real though? I think the teacher would've lost his/her job after saying that.

**Clairity** · 11-13-2007 10:22 AM

Originally Posted by NeAvO

I'm suprise I'm not listed in there

.

Now that you mention it.. I'm surprised you're not there too.

Originally Posted by NeAvO

I liked the last one, are they real though? I think the teacher would've lost his/her job after saying that.

I doubt that they're real.. but it was still a great comeback!

**Spartiate** · 11-13-2007 10:24 AM

Originally Posted by NeAvO

I think the teacher would've lost his/her job after saying that.

Wow, those strict English schoolboards

...

Funny stuff Clairity

.

**ExoByte** · 11-13-2007 10:34 AM

Yeah no kidding! I've got teachers that would pull smartass comments like that on a normal basis

Maybe thats why I've never got the sexual exhaustion one. Funny, but its tossed around so much as if its the greatest thing ever said. I like the others much better

**Mes Tarrant** · 11-13-2007 10:49 AM

Very nice.

Oh and Neenee, you can say what you want in the States, honestly, I've had some teachers say some disgusting things (that were less funny though).

**Sornaensis** · 11-13-2007 10:54 AM

Originally Posted by Mes Tarrant

Very nice.

Oh and Neenee, you can say what you want in the States, honestly, I've had some teachers say some disgusting things (that were less funny though).

My biology teacher makes crude comments often.

**Adam** · 11-13-2007 11:09 AM

In my school you would have been out the door lol.

Love them though Clairity

**Siиdяed** · 11-13-2007 11:28 AM

Haha. I wish my life were a tale of quick-witted comebacks and perfectly executed jibes.

As such, I'd probably only mess up a comeback as good as these, or only think of it an hour later.

**KuRoSaKi** · 11-13-2007 11:44 AM

Lulz Clairity I'm using that cop one if I get pulled over hahaha.

**Mes Tarrant** · 11-13-2007 03:34 PM

Originally Posted by KuRoSaKi

Lulz Clairity I'm using that cop one if I get pulled over hahaha.

What, even if the cop doesn't say that first line?

That'd be a funny episode of joke gone wrong.

**Spartiate** · 11-13-2007 05:50 PM

There was actually an incident in a school in my area where a student recorded a teacher getting pretty verbal on his cell phone. Result? They banned cell phones in the class room

.

**Man of Steel** · 11-13-2007 08:08 PM

Haha, good stuff. That speeding one is great, though. I'd heard the last two before. I think #2 is a here's your sign joke, actually.

**KuRoSaKi** · 11-14-2007 08:11 AM

Then I'd be like "Sorry guys I got here as fast as I could I thought you'd be waiting for me."

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