Thread: Kill the above you user with the object they gave you!

oooooh thank you a remote....

*you fall asleep and i enter your dream,turn on your t.v.to the chiller channel, and proceed to summon monsters out of the t.v.i sic them on you and you fend them off but in doing so in real life you thrash in your bed and fall out hitting your head on your end table and dying from the head wound.*

is that what you mean?????that would be one sucky way to die......

here ya go have this speaker.

Thanks for the speaker I use it to project a song with low bass notes at very loud volume and go away for safety...because as you start irresistably dancing to the music and the bass beats play your heart beats in time to the bass. When the music finally ends your heart stops beating and you die.

Here's a CD for ya.

a fucking CD? in protest I snap it in half and shove it up your ass.

here have a blow torch

i shove the tip up your ass and turn it on full blast roasitng you from the inside.

Here ya go, have this Pepsi can.

I take the open can and shove the sharp opening into your face and grind, torturing and killing you veeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrry slowly.

Have an oompa loompa.

Originally Posted by ray

oooooh thank you a remote....

*you fall asleep and i enter your dream,turn on your t.v.to the chiller channel, and proceed to summon monsters out of the t.v.i sic them on you and you fend them off but in doing so in real life you thrash in your bed and fall out hitting your head on your end table and dying from the head wound.*

is that what you mean?????that would be one sucky way to die......

here ya go have this speaker.

You have to kill me with the remote You can't summon monsters or anything like that But don't try again! You'll have to wait until someone gives you something.

^Thank you! I take the oompa loompa and clone them on a mass scale and make them sing their songs over and over while your forced to listen, then you go crazy and your brain implodes!

Here user below, take this can of Mountain Dew.

Why thank you, slayer, I love Mountain Dew.

I take the delicious beverage and extract all of the caffeine from the drink.
I then rip the can in half and using the sharp tip I make small incisions in your flesh and drip the concentrated caffeine into your bloodstream.
The drug overwhelms your central nervous system and neurons begin firing so randomly and quickly that your brain asplodes and you die.

Here, user below, why don't you borrow this soft, plastic jar of oxygen?

Thanks for the oxygen!

I don't seem to have anything to ignite it with, so I shove it down your throat and kick you so that it breaks while in your throat. You die from the oxygen overdose.

Here, have a bottle of bleach.

A bottle of bleach, such a nice presant you have given me.

I swap the lable of the bleach bottle with the lable from a bottle of milkshake. I hand the bottle of bleach disguised as milkshake and you drink. I watch you scream as your internal organs burn.

Why don't you have my arm.

Thank you for that arm!

I'm just going to walk away with it, because the wound never healed properly and you're bleeding profusely from your brachial artery.
You bleed to death relatively quickly.

Here, have this tissue.

Ahh, just what I needed thanks Elis D(LSD ha ha). While this tissue may appear harmless in everyway imaginable. I sedate you and implant this "foreign body" inside you. You die from inflamation and complications.

Here have my kitty cat.

i painfully shove the kitty cat up your ass and it blocks up your bodily stuff and you die.

Here...take my q-tip

Thank you for the Q-tip.
You know how they say you should not use them to clean your inner ear?
I shove the Q-tip into your ear. Bursting through the eardrum and into your brain. You die twenty seven years later. You see, the Q-tip left you brain dead and in a coma. Eventually your love one's decide to let you go. They pull the plug... beep beep beeeeeeeep. There was no rule against indirect murder, was there?

I pass on a Xbox 360 to the poster below me. Here, take it...

Delayed edit: Forgot to thank you, MTL_Infernus; thank you very much!

I insert 50 Cent: Bulletproof and force you to play it until the unrelenting boredom causes brain hemorrhages.

Hey there subsequent poster, take this sewing machine.

Oh hey, I always wanted one. To thank you, I take the sewing machine and sew together a cloth. I then strangle you with the cloth.

Here you go, have a bowl of fruit salad!

Thank you for the fruit salad, it looks delicious!

I grab you and tie you to a chair and make you watch me eat all of the fruit salad.
Then I leave you there and wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Then I shit out the fruit salad and choke you to death with my fruity, salad-y shit.

Here you go buddy, have 2 hits of ecstasy.

Thanks for the ecstasy!

I take the 2 hits and shove it in your ear causing you some major brain damage and the sort.

Here user below, why don't you borrow my new manga book? Be gentle with it

Thanks! I take your manga book at tear it to pieces. Then I take the pages and put them on you. Then I light the pages on fire, igniting you as well.

Here you go user, have an internet!

Thanks for the internet! I give it to Richard Branson and he destroys it, crushing you and everyone in the world into a quantum singularity.

Yo, have a black hole.

Thank you for the black hole.
I hop in, and am expelled through a white hole in an alternate universe. I carry the white hole with me, and hope from black hole to black hole. Eventually returning to this world. Having a black hole lead to a white hole in the same reality creates a time-space paradix, thereby breaking the universe. You die in the resulting chaos.

P.S. Any physics buff out there can probably pont out a lot of flaws with this plan... don't...

Here you go, a copy of 1984 by George Orwell.

oooh, thank you!

i kidnap you and strap you down making you read it over and over until you go insane.then i feed you the pages so you choke and die.

here ya go have this pancake.(yum.)

I smother you with this pancake.

Here you go user, have this eraser.

thanks for the eraser!

(here comes the sun,dodododo)

uh....i make you a cartoon then slowly erase your outline 'til you no longer exist.

here have this mini white board.

Come on you guys! Be more creative! You could have used that eraser and started rubbing it on his skin giving him skin cancer or something...
You have to beable to do something that's real!