Thread: DCs Say the Darndest Things

In a lucid dream this morning.

Small boy (in perfect British accent): Tell me... Shall it rain three gallons today?
Me (GOD): It shall rain FOUR gallons.

I wake up.

lol gotta put this one, its a non ld.

anyway hes about to shoot her when i say "woah woah woah, i thought you were supposed to shoot me first?" lol, and he says "ok" and shoots me. i dont feel much except slight pressure on my stomach. he then shoots my grandma and i say "that all you got?" he then shoots me again. i then say "really?, really?" in a sarcastic like tone. i laughed my ass off when i remembered this

In my first good lucid dream, I was controlling water with hand motions, like making it shoot up and stuff. A friend of mine, Dave, walks in, and I say "Hey Dave! I'm dreaming! Look what I can do!" and he goes, "Pfft, I can do that in real life!"
Makes me laugh every time I think about it. It made Dave laugh, too, when I told him about it.

Yuriythebest said he had a dream in which he was chatting with someone over the internet via skype. At one point in the dream, he stood up and shook hands with the person in the computer and thought, "Wow, skype is getting really good!"

I was in my house once, I saw some middle aged man leaning on the floor. I was about to say something to him. Then he cut me off and said, "get off the wall!" I was also standing up in the middle of the room. A little weird.

Dc #1: How many midgets dressed as Harry Potter do you think you could take in a fight?

Dc #2: I'd say about 9

{They both laugh}
_______________________
I overheard this conversation while fixing a talent show

Originally Posted by Dream scientist

Yuriythebest said he had a dream in which he was chatting with someone over the internet via skype. At one point in the dream, he stood up and shook hands with the person in the computer and thought, "Wow, skype is getting really good!"

yu . in a nonlucid I and 2 other ppl were sitting behind a single coffee table video conferencing with each other via skype, at one point I stood up and shook one of the guys hands and thought "wow, this skype is getting really good"

So.

This wasn't a lucid dream but :

My friends legs were the size of pencils. She said "HEY LOOK! I CAN RUN MY HANDS THROUGH MY LEGS!" And she runs her fingers through her legs, which turned into silk threads.

In a lucid dream:

I yelled downstairs.. "HEY TOM!" tom- yeah? me- "IS THIS A DREAM?" tom- yeeahhh

Just recently had a dream in which I was being scolded for talking too loudly, and given an ultimatum. Went like this:



T: "If you don't quiet down right now, I will personally make you read the last 100 pages of the Alfalfa-Grower's Handbook and then you'll be forced to look at my mother's sex toys!"

Me: [ignoring the absurdity of the punishment] "Okay, but why do we have to be so quiet?"

T: "There is a cookie in the oven, and we're waiting for it to activate."



...Duh, of course that requires quiet. How could I forget.

Originally Posted by acatalephobic

Just recently had a dream in which I was being scolded for talking too loudly, and given an ultimatum. Went like this:



T: "If you don't quiet down right now, I will personally make you read the last 100 pages of the Alfalfa-Grower's Handbook and then you'll be forced to look at my mother's sex toys!"

Me: [ignoring the absurdity of the punishment] "Okay, but why do we have to be so quiet?"

T: "There is a cookie in the oven, and we're waiting for it to activate."



...Duh, of course that requires quiet. How could I forget.

lol cookies have to activate

I had a dream where I was shopping for t-shirts with my dad:

Me: What are we having for breakfast.
Dad: Ativan and butter.

Two nights ago Karen O. told me that "listening to Led Zepplin is the secret to lesbian exhuberance".

Apparently she expecially likes to listen to them on Mondays.

I was watching Supernatural and Sam was like "a gr.. gr.. GRAIL?!" exactly like 'Tim' says it in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. It was frickin' hilarious

today I had poor dream recall and the only thing I remember was a nonlucid thought from a dream

what if barrak obama was to convert to become a jew would that make him a douchebag?

I thought it was pretty funny

A kid was picking on another kid. The bullying kid told the bullied kid to throw a basketball at him.

When the bullied kid did, the bullying kid responded, "Damn. Better not do that again or he might hit me..."

Had some weird non-lucids last night.

I was in the (apparently really old) version of the cartoon show Teen Titans that I used to watch when I was little ( the new one anyways ). I don't even really remember what was happening. I just remember that everybody had missiles on their backs. They had to get within like 5 feet of each other to launch the missiles. Eventually, everybody with missiles on their backs launch them. The missiles then come straight back down on everybody, and they start running around. One guy (the green one) just hides in the top floor of an apartment building. At this point, the rocket has burned up, so it is really small and resembles a dart. He plucks it out of the air and smashes it.

He looks at me, and says ( in a heavy Japanese voice ) "Maybe I didn't do much, but it's better than hitting a small child off a mailbox"

Then, in the next dream, I decided to bring in Rene Lailoux's Fantastic Planet for my example of abstract art, which ended up in everybody getting bored a minute later and me putting a tape of.... guess what? Teen Titans. The beginning of the first episode opens like this. Three of them are standing around, and the goth girl (I think Raven) says: "And that's how this book became my favorite. It's By Aleister King. The name is "They screw with me now, I bitch about them later".

Quoted from my DJ

Me - “Hey Dad! Could you tell me your work position (job title)”
DC Dad - “No, I don’t want to”
Me - “Please I need to know it”
DC Dad - “I can’t, I am listening to the baby monitor” (suddenly a baby monitor appears)
Me - “But Phoebe (my baby sister) is already awake”
DC Dad - “No but it might affect you”
Me - “What? Ok, just write it down on some paper”
DC Dad begins writing on the edge of a newspaper, drawing what looks like scribbles or writing from a four year old.

DC in a cemetery: I am only here because of roast sausage.

Originally Posted by Kexo

DC in a cemetery: I am only here because of roast sausage.

That reminds me:

DC Dad: Go and remind those kids that their sausages are worth thousands of dollars.

DC Seth MacFarlane makes a 'You lie!' kind of interruption during Yanni singing at a concert, shouting, "You have no emotional taxes!!"

Originally Posted by Goldenheart

In a lucid dream this morning.

Small boy (in perfect British accent): Tell me... Shall it rain three gallons today?
Me (GOD): It shall rain FOUR gallons.

I wake up.

ROFL, that made me laugh IRL. So funny!

XD

I was in a LD and was summoning cake. It wasn't coming, so I asked my DC dad to summon one. He said that we could just eat the "invisible" nonexistent cake right there in the air. He started to "eat" the "cake". It looked so weird, so I continued trying, and it finally came.

Originally Posted by lucidreamsavy

I was in a LD and was summoning cake. It wasn't coming, so I asked my DC dad to summon one. He said that we could just eat the "invisible" nonexistent cake right there in the air. He started to "eat" the "cake". It looked so weird, so I continued trying, and it finally came.

LOL

This is a very interesting and very funny thread.
A couple from me, both taking place in my old school:

I was sitting in the IT room when my history teacher enters and makes this announcement: "Cow cud is a twin."

Another one:

I was round the back of my school. I was nude and was trying to put my clothes on behind one of the rooms so I couldn't be seen. The my English teacher walks past and says something along the lines of: "Ah, getting dressed behind the building so no one can see you. Very cunning."
I later enter the school and there he is again. I pick up a copy of Lord of the Flies and he says: "Ah, Lord of the Flies. Very cunning."

I shall return with more soon.