Thread: Extremely Offensive Jesus Cartoons...

hahahahahahahaha Jesus Christ Porn Star!

i know that jesus guy. he owes me $5

Ehhh... I kinda thought they were lame, to be honest. You'd think, with something like religion, that the average quality of parodies would be much higher than it is.

I LOVE the movie "Dogma" by the way. One of my favourites. You can watch that movie again, and again, and again and still find something funny you hadn't noticed before.

Originally Posted by The

I LOVE the movie "Dogma" by the way. One of my favourites. You can watch that movie again, and again, and again and still find something funny you hadn't noticed before.[/b]

haha, me too - that movie's great!

since when did Jesus wear a bloody crown
he was a carpenter

I'm with TBM
they're crap

Originally Posted by Burns

haha, me too - that movie's great!
[/b]

Thirded. I fuckin Love that movie.

Heheh.

I'm ing this for Dogma discussion.

My favourite parts of the movie: (!!!SPOILERS!!&#33

TEN THINGS I WUV ABOUT DOGMA:

1) The whole "euthanise God to save the world" thing. BRILLIANT.

2) Right at the beginning, after Loki talks to the nun, and him and Bartleby are travelling along the vertical escalator in the airport, if you watch the background REALLY carefully, you'll see the same nun getting caught shoplifting (or something else funny, I can't remember) in the background, as the camera travels past. If you didn't see this, watch the movie again. It's worth it, just to see this few seconds in the background. Fantastic.

3) "Whose house? RUN'S HOUSE! Whose house? SAY WHAT?! Run's houuuuuse!"

4) "Knocks strong odours out." Cheesy, but brilliantly so.

5) Central air.

6) The golf club.

7) God falling over trying to do a handstand.

8) It's raining men. Cardinals, actually.

9) Cardinal Glick. The name. Think about it...

10) The music during the unveiling of Buddy Christ.

Originally Posted by Ynot

since when did Jesus wear a bloody crown
he was a carpenter

I'm with TBM
they're crap
[/b]

Carpenters can't wear crowns? Really though, I think Jesus was supposedly crucified while wearing a crown of thorns. But the crowns in the cartoons aren't made of thorns. Maybe I'll have to look again. I guess the crown represents being "king".

I get a kick out them partly because I live in the American Bible Belt, and I look at stuff like that and think about the looks I would see on the faces of fundamentalist protestants around here if they saw them. I epecially get a kick out of thinking about how the local Baptists would react to it. I live in such a holy roller area, with a protestant church on every corner, that offensive things like that have a pretty strong ring. If you look at none of the others, make sure you see the one about Jesus and crack. The offensiveness alone is hysterical to me.

Originally Posted by The

2) Right at the beginning, after Loki talks to the nun, and him and Bartleby are travelling along the vertical escalator in the airport, if you watch the background REALLY carefully, you'll see the same nun getting caught shoplifting (or something else funny, I can't remember) in the background, as the camera travels past. If you didn't see this, watch the movie again. It's worth it, just to see this few seconds in the background. Fantastic.[/b]

huh, I don't remember that part - now I'm going to have to watch it again!

I laughed to hard at the buddy Jesus statue at the beginning. .

Making fun of religion can be WAY more fun if done better

Yeah, Dogma is a pretty good movie. It is more amusing than it is funny. I thought it was full of really good intellectual insight and thought provoking satire. Nothing in it really made me scream out laughing, and it wasn't really outageous or eccentric or anything, but it was definitely good. Even if I were Catholic, I would have watched it and said, "Hmmmm.... Good points. Very interesting."

I assume you folks have seen Kevin Smith's other movies? Clerks was his best, I think. That is one of those movies I can pop in and watch any time and never get tired of it. I really love the main character's "sane person in an insane world" outlook on life, and that is part of what's so entertaining to me. And the conversations are one riot after another. So are the wild events that keep popping up. Chasing Amy was excellent also. It wasn't as funny as Clerks, but the drama was better. When Ben Affleck's character, uh, I don't want to ruine it for those who haven't seen it... When he and Joey Lauren Adams' character have that very important conversation in the car, that is such an incredible moment of drama. Of course Mall Rats was an absolutely hilarious movie. I think Jason Lee did his best acting role ever in that.

EDIT: Has anybody seen Clerks II? I assume it bombed at the theaters because I never heard a word about it after its opening. It looked pretty lame ass on the previews, but I liked the first one so much I think maybe I will give it a shot. Is it any good?

Dogma was good. My favorite part was when Jay walks in and see's the Angel decapitated and who goes on about why everything is like how it is. Buddy Christ made me laugh too. As well as the demon saying, "incognito." Because it's sort of an inside joke between me and my buddies, but it's like... our word. And he used it.

Do any of you think Dogma is offensive? I don't. It is not very related to the Jesus cartoons. Dogma is an amusing story involving Christian concepts, and it has some light-hearted satire, but the cartoons I posted are not anything like that. They have nothing to do with satire or light-hearted play on concepts. They are all about blatantly offensive shock value. I think that type stuff is a riot.

Originally Posted by Universal

http://christler.bravehost.com/condom3.html

http://christler.bravehost.com/Crackcut.html

http://christler.bravehost.com/porn.html

I think Jesus has finally been busted.
[/b]

...why do most of them only have half their teeth...

You think Jesus has 'finally' been busted? I'd say that being crucified is busted enough.

rofl

Originally Posted by Universal

Carpenters can't wear crowns? Really though, I think Jesus was supposedly crucified while wearing a crown of thorns. But the crowns in the cartoons aren't made of thorns. Maybe I'll have to look again. I guess the crown represents being "king".
[/b]

he knows the crowns represent him being king, but adding them in the cartoon was just stupid, i think he thought.

Originally Posted by Universal

Yeah, Dogma is a pretty good movie. It is more amusing than it is funny. I thought it was full of really good intellectual insight and thought provoking satire. Nothing in it really made me scream out laughing, and it wasn't really outageous or eccentric or anything, but it was definitely good. Even if I were Catholic, I would have watched it and said, "Hmmmm.... Good points. Very interesting."

I assume you folks have seen Kevin Smith's other movies? Clerks was his best, I think. That is one of those movies I can pop in and watch any time and never get tired of it. I really love the main character's "sane person in an insane world" outlook on life, and that is part of what's so entertaining to me. And the conversations are one riot after another. So are the wild events that keep popping up. Chasing Amy was excellent also. It wasn't as funny as Clerks, but the drama was better. When Ben Affleck's character, uh, I don't want to ruine it for those who haven't seen it... When he and Joey Lauren Adams' character have that very important conversation in the car, that is such an incredible moment of drama. Of course Mall Rats was an absolutely hilarious movie. I think Jason Lee did his best acting role ever in that.

EDIT: Has anybody seen Clerks II? I assume it bombed at the theaters because I never heard a word about it after its opening. It looked pretty lame ass on the previews, but I liked the first one so much I think maybe I will give it a shot. Is it any good?
[/b]

wow you didn't even laugh at the scenes with jay and silent bob? i thought thats what they were there for. and yes, i've seen clerks two, and i loved it. its basically about Dante not not feeling satisfied about where he is in his life and he wants to finally like grow up or something like that, but his buddy Randal teaches him to be happy with his life, and of course it fvcking hilarious as well.

and slightly off-topic, i think catholics are usually open-minded enough to not get too riled up about jesus jokes. but those that were posted aren't funny or clever in the least, even the condom one with the contraceptive debate going on. sorry *shrug*

Any kind of blastphemy is just great! Oh and do you supose the artist of that lame ass cartoon was struck down? I doubt it.

Originally Posted by Pensive

You think Jesus has 'finally' been busted? I'd say that being crucified is busted enough.
[/b]

Originally Posted by Pensive

Any kind of blastphemy is just great! Oh and do you supose the artist of that lame ass cartoon was struck down? I doubt it.
[/b]

If I thought that stuff was possible, I wouldn't be posting links to the web site. I would be posting links to the web site of my cult of freaked out missionaries worshipping Jesus in the desert.

Originally Posted by Universal

Do any of you think Dogma is offensive? I don't. It is not very related to the Jesus cartoons. Dogma is an amusing story involving Christian concepts, and it has some light-hearted satire, but the cartoons I posted are not anything like that. They have nothing to do with satire or light-hearted play on concepts. They are all about blatantly offensive shock value. I think that type stuff is a riot.
[/b]

Uhhhh... yeah, but, ANYONE can make crude and blatantly offensive statements. It takes no skill or talent.

With such a fertile ground for intelligent satire as Catholicism and Christianity, I'd have thought there would be a way to... poke some fun at it in a more intelligent manner?

I'm catholic and I didn't think they were that offensive. Probably because they look like they were drawn by a three year old who still makes poopie and fart jokes.

Originally Posted by The

Uhhhh... yeah, but, ANYONE can make crude and blatantly offensive statements. It takes no skill or talent.

With such a fertile ground for intelligent satire as Catholicism and Christianity, I'd have thought there would be a way to... poke some fun at it in a more intelligent manner?
[/b]

There's a certain degree of creativity in it. Those stick man cartoons might not be as long thought out and complex and intellectual as something like Monty Python and the Life of Brian, and I assume the cartoons weren't drawn by Picasso or Renoir, but such extreme offensiveness with even a little creativity is usually really funny to me. I guess it's all subjective. Three people in this thread have gotten a huge kick out of them, and everybody else has really, really disliked them. Some have seemed to flat out bitterly despise them, even for nonreligious reasons. It's strange how only those two extremes have been represented. I guess there's not much else to say about them. I didn't plan on analyzing them so much. I just came across them on an atheist discussion forum and thought some people here might appreciate their shock value.

Speaking of religious comedy, if you like really high quality religious satire, make sure you see Monty Python and the Life of Brian, if you haven't already. I think it is the second funniest movie ever, just behind Holy Grail.

Shock value, maybe. But it's just not very funny....it's that kinda of stupid, in your face joke that tries too hard to be offensive...would be better if it was bit more subtle.

Yeah.

Like, for instance, I could draw a picture of a stick-figure Mohammad getting taken up the ass by a donkey. I mean... it's offensive, but where's the humour? It just... doesn't take any original thought.

Originally Posted by The

Yeah.

Like, for instance, I could draw a picture of a stick-figure Mohammad getting taken up the ass by a donkey. I mean... it's offensive, but where's the humour? It just... doesn't take any original thought.
[/b]

Well, I'd give them more credit than that. Showing Jesus as a white trash retard and claiming that his father, God, actually had sex with Mary and needed to put a piece of rubber on his actual penis to prevent the immaculate conception involves more creativity than that, for example. "Jesus Christ Porn Star" is an pervertedly amusing play on the words of a famous musical. The crack one involves combining two extreme but never connected ideas. Not that I would try to present those things in an art appreciation class. I'm not planning on recommending them to the Pullitzer people or anything.

I didn't mean to be a spokesperson for the cartoons. To each his own. Maybe two more people will get a kick out of them.