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    Thread: Keep dreaming of same girl

    1. #1
      Member SirMathias's Avatar
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      Keep dreaming of same girl

      I know you may have seen plenty of these post, but none I've read seem to fit my situation. So please help me out if you can.

      Kind of a long story I'm gonna make short. (the best I can) Went to my first year of college, and started swing dancing. Figured it'd be fun and a good way to impress girls. I'm an old fashioned guy and think that chivalry is a good way to impress girls, and figured dancing would sweep them off their feet. Well it worked. I met a girl there and she stayed with me all night, which has never happened to me before. Afterwords we had study dates, it was a great time. We'd get off track of studying and just talk. We'd eat together and even had a class together (hence why we studied). I really liked her and I know she liked me, we just never said anything about it. I was too scared to say anything for fear of rejection. We danced and studied and talked for two months. I finally got the guts to say something, but she had to leave, and school ended. Summer was a long four months away from her.
      She wasn't the richest of girls, her phone was kept up by phone cards and she had a junk car that couldn't go far without having troubles. She lives two hours from me. Talking to her was a rare occasion, and my truck is old also so a two hour trip would be rough on it. Then the worst happened, I could not go back to that University due to finacial reasons. I was stuck in a community college here in town. I probably won't get to go back to that university for another year or so. I only visited her once and that lasted about two hours since I was staying with a friend and she had to leave. Now I'm two hours away and haven't seen her in 6 months.
      The dreams start. I was on vacation and had a dream where I ran into her on a trip. We got excited and she hugged me. I told her how much i missed her and she told me it was alright that she was moving to my town. Woke up.
      On a camping trip this time, have a dream about running into her again. We hugged said how we missed each other. We spent that whole night dancing before I woke up.
      This time I was home. Dream of running into her and saying we missed each other as usual. We talked about the stuff she likes to talk about and how we could figure out this distance thing. She hugged me and I woke up.
      The thing is I seem to have gotten over her (at least i thought so) I don't think about her at all during the day anymore, and even have started talking to other girls. I'm trying to move on. The problem is my dreams pull my feelings right back. I wake up depressed, and missing her. The whole day after a dream I think of her. I want to move on but can't if these dreams keep happening. I've never had a girlfriend and been rejected and ignored many times, usually I get over them in a day or two and move on...no dreams or anything. But with this girl the dreams are attacking me. They are strong too, like I said I wake up depressed and in the dream I'm extremely happy. I do not like the dreams even though they make me happy, they keep me tied down. I want to know if this is any kind of sign and what could dreaming about this same girl over and over again mean? How can I stop it, if thats even possible. I just want some light shed on this so I can understand it more. I've never had dreams that have the same subject over and over and I'm confused.
      Thanks for your time and help.
      P.S. No comments on never having a girlfriend please (as in rude comments) It's not because I'm a dork or anything, its that I usually get friend zoned WAY too quickly. Thanks.
      WakingNomad likes this.

    2. #2
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      They say the dreams we remember best are the ones that have something to do with things we are emotionally attached to. Since you do love this woman, it is hard to get her off your mind or out of your dreams.
      I guess you have already thought of this but what about trying to find her on FB or whatever. I mean even if it went nowhere, if you could at least communicate one more time it might offer some closure? I am guessing you two never had that?

    3. #3
      Member SirMathias's Avatar
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      Your right, we've had no closure. I am friends with her on Facebook, but her apartment has no internet so she can only get on when she goes to her parents house.

      I can understand how she stays in my dreams due to emotion...just thought that since I was trying to move on it would go away, guess not.
      hathor28 likes this.

    4. #4
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      <span class='glow_9400D3'>WakingNomad</span>'s Avatar
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      being poor sucks. fucking banks causing worldwide recession.

      anyway, it could be shared dreams, or it could be you really miss her. It was me being constantly plagued by dreams of my ex-wife that led me to DV. lol

      BTW, I was a virgin til I was 29. LOL
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    5. #5
      Member SirMathias's Avatar
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      Yes being poor does suck. I think it might be that i just miss her subconsciously. But this shared dreaming is new to me but also has peaked my interest. i'd have no idea how to find out if it was shared dreaming though, and I feel itd be weird to ask next time I get a chance to talk to her.

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      Personally, I still dream at least a few times a year about people I was interested in decades ago. They keep coming back like a song ....

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      yeah TheErin is right on having dreams of the person you're emotionally attatched to, i've always figured they're a really good way of your sub conscious telling you how you really feel about them and what your doubts and emotions deep down about that person despite your denial when you are awake.

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      I'm in the same boat as you I'm afraid. I too keep dreaming about a girl I like, I haven't talked to her that much but she kept staring at me at the end of the semester and I couldn't make a move because of exams. Now I can't seem to get her out of my mind and dreams...
      I read somewhere that you can get rid of nightmares by standing up to them in a lucid dream, maybe this would work in this case aswell?

    9. #9
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      Seems like you have a similar problem like i did/do. I actually keep it to myself because i tried asking the same question you did, and got no help much. I have recurring dreams of a guy i used to know years ago and this doesn't stop even if you try to forget. Been having the recurring dreams of him for over 7 years off and on.
      I suggest you get to know this girl "IN" your dreams better now that she is in your dreams often, i am slowly getting to know the guy in my dreams and what he can do.
      On my part, i share dream with the guy often, and never know if you are as well. I had a chance to talk to the guy in my dreams and actually know where he is and can find him in dreams because he told me where. To only know if you are share dreaming, you have to speak with the person IN your dream and get answers but this takes time an effort. I just realized i am share dreaming with one person for years and only now notice. Hope this helped.
      Last edited by hathor28; 08-07-2012 at 12:11 PM.

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