Thread: HELP! Takes 1+ hour(s) to fall asleep every night.

Not that big of a barrier, actually. If you stay awake for one day (24 hours), you can take naps and practice LDing in those. Also, "falling asleep quickly" is almost always secret code for "falling unconscious." Instead, you might be able to use your ability to observe the transition from wake to sleep, or to just rest with your eyes closed until sleep gradually arrives. If you are really worried about being "asleep" then this will not occur.

Something else to consider is turning off your electric lights and using candles or a salt lamp with a lower wattage bulb. I have a post about electric light and it's destruction of circadian rhythms in my signature. There are also some tips in my signature about relaxing before bed.

That technique, while it may have worked for the author (and others), sets off alarm bells for me as one of my closest friends finds it almost impossible to sleep when she knows she has to get up for something the next day. It has to do with her anxiety, specifically in this case about missing her alarm.

I think it essentially comes down to what it is that's keeping you up. I've heard, for example, that people that don't exercise often find it hard to get to sleep, which I can attest to myself--if I've done some form of exercise during the day, I'm out like a light in the evening! Generally though, I think the most common cause is just from thinking too much, not being able to 'switch your brain off'. Often this is from worrying too much, but could also be from excitement, or whatever.

I've not a problem getting to sleep for the last three or four years, which is the amount of time I've been meditating. This suggests that it's about my improved ability to control my thoughts, and to empty them when necessary. I remember at the start, if I couldn't get to sleep I'd try meditating (while in bed of course), and just from focussing all my attention on my breath at my nostrils, I would fall asleep almost instantly. (I do, however, have some concerns that this has negatively affected my meditation, as often when I focus on my breath while meditating, I can feel myself falling asleep!)

So that could be something for you to try. Lie on your back, relax your body, and try to focus your attention on the sensation of your breathing. You're mind will wander, probably quite a lot, but each time it does just smile inwardly and gently take your attention back again. Keep doing this, without ever being hard on yourself or worrying that it's not working--I find one of the worst obstacles when it comes to getting to sleep is trying to get to sleep! Something to add that I quite like: breathe in with your attention on the sensation, and then on the out breath seek out all your muscles that are still tensed and relax them. As you go on you'll notice just how many muscles are tense, particularly in your face! Keep looking for more muscles to relax on each out breath. When it feels like they can't be relaxed any more, continue to push them down towards your bed with the tiniest force. Even if it's just psychological, you might feel like they're relaxing further still by almost unnoticeable increments.

Wow! Thank you so much guys! Last night I tried focusing on my breath and nothing else. I just relaxed and enjoyed being comfortable instead of trying to fall asleep and I was out within 20 minutes! I am so happy about this and I will attempt to do the same tonight.

Excellent, great to hear your progress.

In my experience, the most important thing is to *stop trying to do anything*, in particular, "trying" to fall asleep. Continually release tension, physical and mental, on every exhale. Any time I successfully manage to maintain this release/ "letting go" approach, I fall asleep quickly. There is always the temptation to start following thought chains: this is what keeps us awake. Meditation practice can help with building resistance to this temptation, and with learning how to continually release tension.

I think there is benefit in getting up if you're not tired. If you can't fall asleep in 20 minutes, get out of bed, and sit in the dark with quiet thoughts, maybe read something (something kind of boring, preferably). Reserve being in bed for sleeping: do not read, watch TV, think/plan your day, etc. in bed. I think this is a healthy way to approach to the "training yourself" technique.

Originally Posted by HansiElneff

Wow! Thank you so much guys! Last night I tried focusing on my breath and nothing else. I just relaxed and enjoyed being comfortable instead of trying to fall asleep and I was out within 20 minutes! I am so happy about this and I will attempt to do the same tonight.

Woo! Glad to hear it worked! Happy sleeping