My Poetry Page

I'm always worried about losing my poems. I don't write anymore, unfortunately. Maybe posting some of my oldies will get me feeling creative again as well as storing them safely where I can't lose them.

The first poem in my collection was written for school in 1987 :)

"Angels

I'd love to be an angel
With beautiful, silken wings
And live way in in Heaven
In a Haven full of trees

I'd fly around the kingdom
Riding a beam of light
And watch my friends
Who live on Earth
And see that they're alright

I'd be a perfect angel,
Obeying every rule
And if I really had to
I'd even go to school

I'd make some friends
And keep them
They'd never be hurt
nor teased

For even in the City of Peace
Friends are what
We really need."



Now jump ahead to 1989

"If Anybody's Out There

If anybody's out there,
Listening to my prayer
First off I'd like to thank you
For you're the only one who cares.

My parents tongues are slashing,
Shattering all my dreams
At times I'd like to curse them,
At other just to scream.

They say my plans are stupid,
They say that I'm a snob
I fear they're right and then we fight
And afterwards I'd like to sob.

My fathers hands are brutal
They hurt with every strike
He calls my brother many names
We'd like to take a hike!

I know they've got their problems
But so do the kids they borne;
I wish they'd stop and think
Before they hit, before they scorn."



1990
This was written for a story I wanted to write but never did.

"Niawa

The gods, they gathered 'round the moon
Earth is born, day, night and noons.
Primitive creatures made from the earth
Man and woman, holy births.

The Heavens shine above with war
Demons roam the earth in scorn
The Evil god wants to reign
Niawa fight, balance maintains.

Water tumbles from the sky
Most man and creature have hence died
The world is cleansed, no more askew
The demons buried, life starts anew...

Not True."


Skip a bunch of emo poems...
Now it's 11/07/1991 I was 17 years old and had run away from home. I was living in some water drainage tunnels under the streets of Pensacola, Florida and my boyfriend at the time told me many tall tales about adventures he had taken with a friend. His stories helped inspire this poem.

"Cave Hell

The memories that were made here,
the time that we shared,
Still longing to do more
and willing to dare

We experienced good,
survived the bad,
We froze and fought
but we'll always be on top

Never-ending tunnels
Ever-lasting tears
We'll say farewell to sorrows
We'll throw away our fears

I hear a whistle blowing
Only time will tell
We'll be in a box-car rolling
Somewhere between here and hell.

[Dedicated to "Quint, Hawk and W.D. May your adventures never die and the road never end. And may we all be young and free forever.]"


Skip a bunch more emo poems

1993 An excerpt from a Novelette I wrote

"For Love, For Life

Unicorns dance at twilight high
the elves and fairies drawing nigh
Words of wisdom echo past
This land called Peace, forever last

Embrace me hard, embrace me long
Keep me safe from all ill wrongs
From thunder, rain and creeping things,
Monster, bullies, thieves;

No harm to me or those I love
I beg of you, please keep."

(It was the prayer and escapism of a young teen who was kidnapped and sold as a sex slave)


Skip yet more emo poems :D
This next one was written 07/29/1997 I was working as an exotic dancer, drinking every night and one night I saw where my life was heading if I continued.

"Tears of a Child

Daddy won't you play with me
I need your love, why can't you see?
Not only tears or endless strife
Your silence cuts me like a knife

Mommy, I'll be good today
Just never, ever go away
I'm not found in any bottle
But I'd love a shot of mollycoddle

I don't ask for much, you know
But through your love, I learn to grow
Just some patience and a little time
And maybe, please, a soothing rhyme?

The kids at school have marvels to tell
About family times; how all is well
None have a tear to brim a single eye
Why push me away, the harder I try?

Haven't you guessed that I love y'all yet
Or is that something you'll never 'get'?
I know you both have lives that bind
Please remember your child, don't leave me behind."



Another Novelette excerpt. Written at around 1995

"March For Freedom [a song]

Allow me, friends, to tell you a story
The story's about love and also of freedom
Our planet is riddled with plagues and diseases
Our people are dying, they're filling the streets

But we'll march on, march to the light
March for our lives and our freedoms
Our heartaches wont last long we'll one day know peace
For this life's like a nightmare from which we'll escape.

We've gone on and lived what fate's chosen to give us
And our lives may be rough, but our souls are enduring
We have prayed for the strength to be able to make it
And make it, we will, with Christ on our side

And we'll march on, march to the light
March to our strength and our courage
The Lord is our staff, we can draw on his love
Oppression, behind us, we will rise above!

Our spirits are high as we travel to better
The place is like Heaven, it's meaning is peace
There are many a person who stand in our way
But with God in our hearts, He will show us the way

So we will march on, march to the light
March to the city of beauty
In Heaven, above us, His armies are strong
Christ sets a new course, the angels joining our throng!"

"... And Nothing More

Within my walls, I hear a sound
Some nightmare creature, therein bound?
"No," says I, "'Tis just a mouse
"Come to nest in my wee house."

So I laugh to spite my frightened fear,
my childish woes, my stomach- queer
But then, a voice says, from within my walls:
"We delight in dread and dire squalls!"

"'Tis just the wind." Says I, "And nothing more
"No sounds of cries, or shrieks, or roars.
"No beast within my home doth dwell!
"No evil chiding. No evil tales."

"'Tis just the wind and nothing more."

And yet the noise within my dwelling swells
To a clamor befitting a hundred hells
"No wind," Murmurs I; my voice a rasp
"Perchance a storm." And then I gasp

For falling to the floor in mounds
the plaster of my walls crash down!
My heart leaps fro at a deadly pace
My skin turns pale- a hanged mans face.

I think I see eyes within my death-dark walls
Are those opened mouth in feasting calls?
"No." Moans I, whist I shake my head
"'Tis just a storm." Says I, with dread.

"'Tis just a storm and nothing more."

No larger than a cat- the creature,
leaps to my floor, the Devils feature
With the head of a man and tail of rat,
scale covered body and teeth of bat:

It looks upon my throat, in need;
the hell sent creature- Satan's seed...
And as my fingers touch my dwellings door
more monsters come- in droves, in scores

"No!" Cries I. "'Tis just a dream!
"There is no cause to fret or scream!
"A dreadful dream and nothing more
"'Tis mere imagined visions of death and gore."

"'Tis just a dream and nothing more!"

Yet my hand still twitches in horrid fright,
whilst my heart and soul doth curse the night
Bound by fear, I cannot flee!
I am hypnotized by all I see.

Then they seize my throat and tear my chest
"Leave his bones!" Cries a creature. "To feed the rest!
"Our dirty work has just begun
"So let us kill the good and have our fun!"

And the creature, more like demons,
Still emerge from holes, their bodies steamin'
As if newly born from hell- their home:
My house, their gate, our earth to roam

My life, no more; our earth, their own."


By far my very favorite poem. Many people think it was inspired by Poe, but I have never read "The Raven" lol
I was very sleep deprived when I wrote this and the words just "came" to me. It was written sometime in November or December 1997

Here's another long one. It was inspired by the success of the one before it lol. This one always felt a little too "forced" and I've never been completely happy happy with it. It was written, 12/17/1997

"Evil Eyes

One winter's night, so dark and dreary
I stumble from my bed, still weary
'Tis Christmas Eve, yet my heart doth dread
The sight mine eyes t'will see beyond my bed.

T'were no stockings hung from my [small] fireplace
T'was not a glimmer of light to caress a child's face
"What child" I bethink. "I am now all alone.
"Left to wonder the halls of this old, haunted home."

My spirit, in danger, of eternal brimstone

I hear a rap upon my floors
"What beast be thee?!" My soul implores
I see no demon, however, just a tiny ball
Rolling into the heart of a too vacant hall

Mirthless laughter fills my ringing ears
My body shakes, fear brings forth tears
For in the shadows lurks my long dead child
Light dances in his eyes gone wild

Evil eyes and soul defiled

But t'was the evil I spied on my own ghastly face
Because my own bitter soul I did severely debase?
For the heart of the spirit is seen through the eys
And I have lost my defenses. I have lost my disguise.

My boy stands before me with a silent bequeath:
He wants me to join my lost family; to embrace him in death
His trembling hands weld a phantom-like knife
The monster, my son, how he longs for my life

Vengeance is his and my terror is rife

"Be gone, you ghoul! Go back to hell!
"Can you not see I am now faring well?!
"I am not ready yet!" I rant and rave
"Find someone else to fill a grave!"

My boy merely trembles as if a leaf
He seems overcome with unbearable grief
He stands stock-still, makes not one sound
Yet I still sense movement all around.

My dead t'were rising from the ground.

Then finally, my son approaches
Talk of loss, he slowly broaches
I stumble back, his touch I fear
Then scores of moans mine ears doth hear.

I dread the questions to which my dead need answers
Of yesteryear- of macabre disasters
Whence my sanity had slipped and I went mad
From which there on out life turned so bad...

My family, no more, pain t'was all I then had.

He pulls me in an embrace as mist
bowing my head, my forehead he kissed.
"Poor father," says he. "See the pain in my eyes?
"Because of your deeds, you are now Satan's prize."

See, my lad t'was not evil, he merely sought my redemption
For I had murdered my family with no trepidation
My moppets and my wife I had so thoughtlessly slayed
Now my crimes against God shall be utterly paid

My family dragged me to hell on a path I had paved."


It was painful for me to write that lol. It is worse than bad lol

This next one was written in 1995 when I was pregnant with my first daughter. It turned out to be a morbid sort of lullaby I sang to my girls.

"Ballad of Time and Love

You're my little baby
My precious baby girl
You sleep both days and nights
But your life's still such a whirl
There'll come a day
When you learn the way
Of growing up
Of being tough
Just promise you wont doubt your part
In our family and our heart.

You're my little baby
My precious little girl
Now when you go about
Boys heads do twirl
Please dont cry
When some say goodbye
Your heart will mend
You will not die
Your spotlight will draw nigh- aim high
That day is drawing nigh.

You're still my little baby
My precious, precious girl
I've grown old and you've grown up
My memory's in a swirl
I've done my job
I've seen it through
Now it's your turn
There's much to do
A husband have you found for thee
and children for your knee.

Hush now little baby
My precious, much loved girl
I know things now are tough
But my wings 'round you I'll curl
Thought my job was through, I said
It's just anew in Heaven's stead
From here I'll watch you night and day
All harm I'll keep at bay... I pray."



Then I had a nasty split up with my kids' father in 1998

"Myths and Fools

Wherever there's love
I'll show you a lie
Just a myth on which
Only a fool shall rely
For at the moment of capture
There's felt only grief
Not a glimmer of hope
Just a prayer for relief."


And then I worked as a stripper and had a bout of sleeping around.
Summer of 1998

"Untitled

A fuck, a friend
A heart to mend
Still looking
To settle down

Lonely heart
Not a romance to start
Just a string
Of one-night stands

Dark light, hungry eyes
Many faces, all disguised
But I'm merely a fantasy
An easy bang behind the bar

A pole, a rail
My soul on a nail-
If only they knew
How I'm dying inside."



Eventually, my beliefs changed. I no longer believe all good people go to heaven. I don't believe in a fiery hell. I definitely don't believe people become angels when they die :D
All of the poetry I wrote after the untitled one above were religious in nature. But I'm too tired of typing to record them right now lol

I finally felt creative the other night and wrote a song. The beat doesn't quite fit with the lyrics though. The beats are at a solid rythme (?) of 8 no matter how they look when read.

Desperately adrift and dreaming
Lost, confused, my heart is screaming
Misery and fears abounding
Life could not be more astounding
Toward bitterness I am abounding

Wolves are howling at my door
Tears, like rivers, do I pour
Release me now, I dare to pray
For comfort, peace and love wont stay

Winter now is almost over
Life and love must find another
I am weary to my core
Life and dreams, I'll have no more.

-November 15, 2009 A.D.B.-