Where to find someone alike you

[006]

As the title says, I was just wondering that how could anyone (including me) find someone alike him/her? Well we are somewhat alike here in this forum, and mainly I thought that if I want to find someone alike me, that person might do the same things, right? But starting out from myself, I'm going out but not that much, I'm not smoking and not going into parties in town, rather to a friend where we are 4-5 with no girls at all. I was always pretty serious all my life, maybe this just drove me overthinking stuff and willing to "already" find someone, but I want to, and I know it can't get boring for me, nor for her if we are alike. Of course as anyone else, I could have already have a few, if not a lot of girlfriends, but I'm still that ordinary idiot who also cares about inners. So, where to? Bars are out, no one wants drunk dating ot anything, at least not me. However I tried, well, didn't really met anyone like me, or they were too drunk . Cinemas? Pretty low chance, but sure who doesn't go to see a movie sometimes? Yet no. Billiards / bowling / darts? Never really saw a girl there, or if I did than with a boyfriend. Restaurants? Oh come on, when you are eating and someone comes in just stand up and go there or what? That's just silly, and didn't work. Cafe bars (or what)? I'm not drinking cafe, hate it, sport gives me enough power through the day. Sport? Well, didn't ever see a girl doing any self-defence thing personally, but we'll see, I'll start a new one soon. Camps / tours? Mostly there are families going, my family is not that type, and didn't ever see a girl in my age. Hell, I would neither go alone. So, I just want to hear ideas or anything, I don't know. I already got over my shyness mostly and willing to do many things, whatever needed to find her. I'm just asking because no matter how much I'm thinking, can't nail this one, and I'm trying to give as much chance for it as possible, even if this post moves only like half percent.

[ZantZen]

If you live in an urban or suburban environment, take a walk. You don't need a destination, or a purpose, but just take a leisurely stroll through the streets or park, if one is nearby. If you run into somebody you take a liking to, fantastic. Talk to her a little bit and discuss random topics. Just start the conversation with something casual, like asking how her day was or wondering where she's walking to. Chances are, however, many people here will have someone. If she is talking slightly openly and you dont have to ask questions all the time to keep the conversation going, ask if she would be okay with giving you her phone number. Do NOT ask this right off the bat, because you will seem to be just trying to get a one night stand, or you will just look sleazy. Be sure to tell her a little about yourself, so you're not too prying. And by the way, she may not care about you. Sad truth. Do not be discouraged by the loss of a first attempt, or a second, or even a third. But if you're going to walk around the same area all the time trying to talk to women, you will look creepy. So don't do that. I don't know if I am much of a help, but I hope I did something for you. Good luck!

[006]

Thanks for the reply! There are parks nearby, one near my old school always used by students to smoke, and another one near a bus station, where even we were drinking with my friends However there is a bigger one a little further away, I'll give it a shot, who knows? Won't get discouraged for sure, that just can't really hit me I guess.

[ZantZen]

If there are kids smoking or being able to find ways to smoke in one of them, I wouldn't advise going to that one. I would go to the big park so it would be normal to walk around it, and besides there would be more people in the large park.

[Marvo]

How to pick up chicks in Eastern Europe

[melanieb]

**Thread moved to Ask/Tell Me About section** Helpful replies only please.

[Zoth]

There's some website (I can't remember the name atm) where you can browse loads of groups depending on their interests. They represent random people with a love for something like tennis, or rock music, or books, or whatever it might be, and they organize reunions in their area. I don't know if your country/location has people using it, but it's worth a try ^^

[JoannaB]

Community service projects: look for some organization like a church or any other organization that organizes some community service projects that provide people a chance to in a group do something good together with other people, for example our church organizes lunch for homeless people, and parishioners as well as university students volunteer to help cook - I bet that would provide an opportunity to a student to meet other students and look for common interests. Also I know of at least some single people who have joined our church mostly to try to find a significant other. Then there is grocery stores. I know of a store in our area that people call the social Safeway because of how common it is for people to go there looking for a date. Hey, at least you will already know that the other one also likes the same brand of canned tomatoes? Plus a grocery store may provide natural excuse for chatting up a stranger. Oh, and if there is a line at check out, and you time it right so that you stand right behind someone whom you are interested in, they may just be bored enough waiting in line to welcome and excuse to chat, and they cannot escape as easily before you get a chance to make an impression.

[Xox]

You can meet someone literally anywhere, you just have to get used to approaching them without seeming creepy. Now this is the hard part because as soon as a girl gets approached, she already thinks the guy is probably creepy unless he is good looking. I'm generalizing here and everyone is different blah blah, but I'm just talking generally. So you have to talk about something relevant; it could be something boring like the weather (but only if the weather is really weird or else it's out of place to talk to a stranger about weather). Or if they happen to be carrying a book they're reading, or a device they're using, even what they're wearing. If you see someone in a grocery store it becomes easier because you can comment on what they're getting. You just have to be creative and come up with ideas on the spot. It's also easier if you're waiting in line together, sitting next to each other in a coffee shop, just some kind of shared experience where its not weird to say something. I mean, I've made friends in the fitting room at a store. This is the most readily available way to meet people and the more you do it the more natural it gets. I don't know whether you're a smoker (cigs), but I would say this is one of the best ways to meet people. There are common areas where smokers assemble, especially around unis and such and its natural to strike up conversation while smoking. But if you don't smoke, don't just pick it up for this reason lol. There is also a site called meetup.com or something like that where people meet based on common interests. Look into activities around where you live where you do something that suits your interests and you could meet people through that since you already have some kind of connection to begin with. Which leads me to my last piece of advice, the best way to meet people really is through other people. Maybe you need to expand your social circle, be more social in general. It doesn't necessarily have to be with females, it could also be with males, that's the most standard way of meeting people - through friends. I would also suggest not dismissing bars and that kind of thing completely. They all have different atmospheres and aren't loaded with drunk people you can't even talk to. Go to ones with an older crowd maybe or just a different ambience. At an earlier time? It's one of the best ways to meet people - that's why a lot of people go there.

[006]

Thanks for the replies! I'll try to use as many as I can.