I don't know if I am lucid?

Hello people, I am new here on Dreamviews. Nice to meet you all! :D

I will give some information about myself. I've been trying to have a LD for 1 month and a few weeks. I have a dream diary starting from 24th Jan till today (7th March). I do like 7 reality check on average. But I do them seriously. I do the fingers-through-palm, counting finger, and nose pinching checks. I have had a few dreams where I dreamt that I was lucid, but I actually wasn't (level 0 lucidity). In one of my many dreams I actually got up from my bed and performed some RCs. If I was lucid (I'm not sure, I will ask my question later), lucidity lasted for 5 seconds max. Then few days later, I dreamt that I knew I was lucid, I even said to myself that I am actually sleeping in my bed, BUT.. I wasn't lucid. All this happened a month ago. Recently, I dreamt that I woke up in the night and started to do the DEILD. Of course, I was sleeping. But it felt real. Now comes the main topic I guess.. :P

Today, I had some VERY long dreams, and they were vivid. I think it is so because I have incorporated the ADA technique.
So in one dream, I was just looking at a netted railing, when I slowly began to realize it is a dream. Slowly, but surely in like 4 seconds. It wasn't instantaneous. Then after becoming sure, I performed the nose RC and it obviously worked. HOWEVER, unlike what I've read, neither the dream came into focus, neither it felt real, nor I became excited. So this brings up my question: Was I lucid? (detailed later)
Next, after attaining 'lucidity' I began to search for one of my favourite fictional character: Saigusa Haruka (<3). Even though I know it is tough for a beginner like me to summon DCs, it was one of my ardent wishes to meet her. I tried to summon her behind me. I tried to expect her. But it didn't work. So, I saw around and saw a fork in the street. I ran toward it and I actually saw a girl with pinkish-purple hair (Haruka has purple hair). But it wasn't her. Someone else. I tried to ask who she was but she wouldn't reply. Just after she said, "Do you want to know my name?", I woke up. I couldn't even say anything. I did a RC, and it failed. I woke up in reality and I checked the time: 7:44 AM. The 'lucidity' lasted for like 20 secs. I though that it was too early to wake up plus I might have some longer dreams. So I slept again. Oh.. btw, I woke up earlier too, around 5 I guess. That time I did the MILD. That is the reason, I presume I was, if I was, lucid. Then after sleeping again, first time I had a false awakening. I did the nose RC and it of course worked. I don't know if I was lucid again, but I THINK if the RC works, I will definitely become lucid. Yet again, I tried to find Haruka. It was night outside, so I tried to make it day. It didn't work. And as soon as I was out, I woke up again... or so I felt. This 'dream' lasted for like 10 secs I did nose RC again, and it worked again :D. BUT, there were certain indications that highlight I wasn't lucid. This time I smartly first stabilized the dream by rubbing, spinning etc. A feeling of being 'vacuumed' in reality went away. Now, I actually went out of my home. Just for the sake of my curiosity, I tried the hand checking RC. My fingers didn't pass through my palm, but my hand was distorted- my index finger being as small as the pinky finger. And from night it became morning. I continued to search Haruka (I love her <3). THIS time, I found her. Like she is, no dupes etc. And she was crying. I found her suddenly behind me. I think I expected her. After some embracement, I woke up in real. This one lasted for around 45 secs.

So this was my story. Now comes the question and the doubts.

Question) Was I lucid anytime I mentioned?

[a] If I was, then it was a disappointing experience, contrary to what I have read (LD being one of the best experience in life). Is LD really what I experienced?

[b] If I wasn't, then why, even after performing RCs and trying to find a DC and actually find them, I wasn't lucid? Something I'm missing? I think this is the correct option. I also think I'm missing out the 'Eureka!' feeling.

Doubts
[When I feel I wasn't lucid]:
{i} No expected focus of dream world.
{ii} No expected 'vividity' and realism (but maybe that's because I've just started).
{iii} No 'Eureka!' feeling after reality checks.
{iv} No excitement --something that beginners experience.
{v} No 'best-experience-of-the-life' feeling.
{vi} A feeling of unreliability, like the dream could collapse anytime, and I would wake up. This especially happens when I am about to wake up. It's like the feeling when you are being pulled out of a dream. And it is very frustrating.
{vii} Everything felt automatic, especially, the part where I had a false awakening and I did the nose RC. I mean, why would I suddenly think of doing the RC?
{viii} I didn't have a logical sense during the dreams. I couldn't think clearly. I could only think of finding Haruka, even though I have planned to first stabilize the dream.
{ix} I felt 'alienish'. In other words, I didn't feel like myself, nor I felt walking around the dreams (nearly the same as ^).
{x} I didn't 'actually' wanted to find Haruka. It's something I have 'planned'. My actual desire is to explore the dream world first and possible talk to some DCs in my first lucid dream.
{xi} Couldn't make it day. If this is tough for beginners, cut this argument.
{xii} Dream was 'fuzzy' when I tried to remember it, like usual dreams.
{xiii} How can I suddenly have 3 LDs in a night? I mean, the probability is extremely low.


[When I feel I was lucid]:
{i} Successful reality checks.
{ii} Successfully summoned the DC I wanted, though it took time.
{iii} I wake up after expected lucid dream duration for beginners -60 secs max.
{iv} Recent ADA technique and more exhaustive RCs during the day (mentioned in Dreamviews tutorials) could have been successful for me.

As you can see, my doubts where I feel I wasn't lucid clearly outnumbers the doubts I feel I was lucid.

I'm sorry for the wall of text, but I want everything I feel could give the most accurate answer.

P.S. I nearly got a WILD unexpectedly a month before, but the hallucinations scared the sh*t out of me :/

If you know it's a dream, you're lucid. If you don't you're not. You knew you were dreaming in your dreams so they were lucid. Great job!

Dream control and stabilization are different from lucid dream induction.

With dream control, I find it best to just imagine something happening without worrying about whether it actually happens or not. Inside the dream, imagine the dream coming into focus like a camera and see what happens.

^ My internet crashed before I posted and Dolphin has already said most of this now, but I'll post what I wrote anyway. :P

A lucid dream, by definition, is a dream in which you are aware that you're dreaming. So yes, it does sound like you were lucid.
However, it sounds like you are confusing other elements of dream quality (dream control, dream clarity, goal memory, etc.) with lucidity itself.
Lucid dreams come in all different shapes and sizes: they can be long or short, vivid or dull; you can have strong memories from waking life (including your goals and details about your life) or you can have virtually no memories from outside the current dream; you can have a high level of control over the dream, or seemingly no control at all.
No two people's experience will be exactly the same, so it's perfectly normal if your experiences don't match those you have read about.
It's actually quite common for lucid dreams to come in waves - this can happen for beginners and veterans alike, so 3 LDs in a night isn't unheard of!

So the good news is, you can expect to get a lot more out of lucid dreaming if you keep practicing. But practicing is vital for improving the quality of your dreams.
Some people get lucky and have a very exciting/memorable lucid dream straight away, but for most people, the more stable lucid dreams and stronger dream control come with time and practice.
I think you will get the most out of lucid dreaming if you remember to enjoy the journey - each lucid dream might not be the best experience of your life, but you are sure to have a lot of fun and interesting experiences if you keep at it!
Good luck, and happy dreaming! :dreaming:

Thank you for taking out time to reply me :) I appreciate it a lot! It's encouraging for me and of course, cleared my confusion. I'll practice for a fortnight, and if I manage to have another LD experience, I'll go ahead and practice stabilizing and increasing the duration of dream :D

Quick Question, can a lucid dream be as vivid as real life? I mean, I'm imagining a very vivid lucid dream as something as detailed and clear like reality, only exception being you the God and controlling it.

Yes, lucid dreams can be just as vivid as waking reality! Some people even have lucid experiences that they describe as more vivid than waking life.

Congrats on the progress so far, keep at it! :goodjob2:

Thanks again, dolphin and ~Dreamer~ :D :D I'm thrilled now :D The answers will satisfy my curiosity, thanks again!

Yes, you were lucid! if you know it's a dream it means you are having a lucid dream.

BUT, lucid dreams have different ''levels of lucidity''.

When your lucidity level is low the lucid dream is very crappy. the dream is not vivid, it's not clear, it doesn't look real, everything is kinda blurry, you can't control it very well, and you even feel like you're not thinking clearly, you forget to do things you wanted to do, sensations are dull, stuff like that, and many times the LD lasts very little, like less than 2 minutes. It sucks!

When your lucidity level is medium you can see much more clearly like if everything was real, you can control the dream with some effort, you can think clearly like you do when you're awake, maybe you forget to do some stuff but that would be because of too much excitement not because you're not thinking clearly, sensations feel much more intense, like when you fly you feel funny in your stomach. I would say that when your lucidity level is medium everything seems and feels like in real life! and the dream can last 10-30 minutes or even more if you keep calm and consistently stabilize the dream using some stabilization techniques like rubbing your hands together or simply focusing on your senses. This lucidity level can be sooooooooooo cool! It's like being in the real world but you can do anything you want, anything you can imagine and have lots of fun!... but there's another level, harder to reach but completely breathtaking, the high lucidity level!


When your lucidity level is high you will be left absolutely speechless! Everything will look so extremely real you might even freak out at how things seem and feel! and I know this will sound stupid but on this level of lucidity sometimes things look ''more real'' than ''reality'', they look much more detailed and colorful, your vision is perfect, you can look further away and see things more clearly than how you would in real life, and also feels like there was some sort of vibration in the environment that you can feel, something I've never experienced in real life. You can think very clearly and you can control the dream more easily, although controlling the dream like appearing objects, DC, changing the shape of objects or teleporting to another place can still be tricky to do if you don't have much practice.
Experiencing this level of lucidity will be something you will always remember and then you will want to lucid dream every night so badly!

Some things to point out about the high lucidity level are:

- That (at least in my experience) this lucidity level is harder to make it last long than the medium-level, not impossible but simply somewhat harder, it's more fragile, and if you get too excited or forget to stabilize it regularly it will very likely collapse.

- If you are having an LD with medium lucidity level you can use some techniques to increase your lucidity level to reach the high one. But to go from the low level to the high level is very difficult, I have never done it, probably because when your lucidity level is low even thinking straight can be a challenge.

- As you get more experienced in lucid dreaming your lucidity level will improve, and you might get to the point in wich you have more high-lucidity lucid dreams than low-lucidity lucid dreams or at least more medium-lucidity LDs than low ones.


So my conclusion would be: DON'T BE DISCOURAGED, don't be disappointed because from first-hand experience I can tell you that Lucid Dreams CAN be that ''super real virtual world'' you have read about! It's just that, as anything else, to have the cool lucid dreams first you need to gain some experience and improve over time, and that's done by having some very crappy lucid dreams like the ones you had until they get gradually better.

Dream on my friend! (;

Thank you for finding the time to write this for me, bro :) Beautifully described. I'm determined about learning this thrilling phenomenon that stays with us for lifetime. Hopefully, I will become skilled by this year. I will feel satisfied with myself after learning LDing, and maybe I could die peacefully then :chuckle:!