dreamt of dad day after he passed

Ok so this started of with me chasing my dad while he was riding his favorite lowrider bike. I was trying to catch up with him so I could give him these tassels to put on his handle bars. As he was riding his bike pass the school near my sisters house I yelled after my dad and said wait up dad I have these for you. He finally came to a stop in front of my grandparents old house, put the kick stand out and set his bike down. I then kept saying "hello, dad can you hear me? I'm talking to you" no answer "I have been chasing you for the past few blocks." Still no answer. My dad then turns around looks me in the eyes like he always did and said, "dont worry about me." I told him "huh?" He spoke again and said "dont worry about me, I'm in a better place." This dream felt so real that when I was dreaming my eyes had started getting teary and I woke up to tears in my eyes. Opinions? Advice? I could use either

What we do in our lives can easily affect a dreams. Especially things that are regarded as important to us, we tend to incorporate them in our dreams. Your dream doesn't have a certain meaning, it just proves that he was a big part in your life, and you cared about him. I can almost guarantee you will have dreams similar to this again, so don't worry :P

Thanks for replying I do have a lot of dreams like this some end with me waking up not being able to move. In fact a little while ago I had another dream on my dad but his presence was completely different very malevolent and demonic,not like my other one of him that felt bright peaceful and angelic. I have never In my life had a dream of my dad In that manor. I've had dreams about him passing away in his sleep (which is how he passed in real life), but never like that. It was like "it" looked like him but his eyes were empty. My dad was the best father you could ask for religious, kind, always there when you needed him so this one just doesnt match him like the first at all!, i really appreciate ur input thank you :)

Hi christybear. Firstly I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your dad.

My Dad too passed away quite recently not long after my Mom, and like you he was (still is) a big part of my life, along with my Mom. I too get lots of dreams with my parents in still, even to the point where they are my main dreamsigns, and I often become lucid and try and ask them things. I look forward to seeing them, etc.

I hope you too find comfort.

Regards. :)

Thanks robstar do you think this could actually be my dad reaching out to me, communicating through dreams to assure me he's ok? Or is it something my mind has made up. Because this dream was so bright and serene like how it would be if I were in heaven. Then a cpl weeks later I had a dream of my dad but wasn't him I explained it right above your comment. You think you could shed some light on this? Thanks again for your condolences

I keep an open mind myself. It is a very hard one to call personally. Rationally I would answer by saying the subconscious route, but only you can really answer that deep down. However in saying that I think the first dream you had must have been quite profound in causing such emotion. I find such dreams comforting, so who knows?
Maybe the second dream deals with the negative aspects of your loss and harsh reality of life/death rather than anything sinister.

Regards.

That's a really good way of putting it never really thought of it like that, thanks Im trying to look more into a logical reason first before I start looking towards the mystical :) thanks a bunch robstar

And yes my dream emotions get super intense like ill wake up crying or heart pounding scarred, or full body paralysis which happens more frequently than I would like it to

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Originally Posted by christybear

And yes my dream emotions get super intense like ill wake up crying or heart pounding scarred, or full body paralysis which happens more frequently than I would like it to

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Remember nothing can hurt you and the paralysis will soon pass.

I know I try and tell myself until I see a dark shadow at the end of my bed or hear my name then I completely panic and I try to scream but no sound comes out... I jus have always hated it since I was a kid

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Originally Posted by christybear

I know I try and tell myself until I see a dark shadow at the end of my bed or hear my name then I completely panic and I try to scream but no sound comes out... I jus have always hated it since I was a kid

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I used to get a few quite a while ago now. I agree that they are frightening. I found nearly every episode I had involved me sleeping on my back - so I try to avoid that position early in the night. Even the Wikipedia article (below) makes a correlation between these events and the suprine (sleeping on your back) position.

Try to have a regular sleep pattern as insomnia, stress, etc. does not help. Also avoid stimulants (coffee, tea, etc.) before bedtime. Most of all be comfortable with no distractions.

As I stated before, the feeling is frightening as you seem powerless. The hallucinations you experience seem to feed off fear. I found in my case if you fought the paralysis then it made things worse. Think to yourself that no harm will come to you and the paralysis will soon pass.
I have heard or read somewhere (athough I have never had chance to see if it worked?) that if you found yourself in this nightmare situation, then you if you could muster the thought of moving your toes then this helped to break the 'spell' of the paralysis.

I have added the following: .Sleep paralysis - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I have posted the article link to draw your attention to the prevention paragraph (Contents '6') as the rest of the article, although interesting, is a bit deep in technical and medical stuff, etc. For example, the word 'disorder' is used, however you will be suprised to find this type of experience is relatively quite common.

Regards :)

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Originally Posted by christybear

Ok so this started of with me chasing my dad while he was riding his favorite lowrider bike. I was trying to catch up with him so I could give him these tassels to put on his handle bars. As he was riding his bike pass the school near my sisters house I yelled after my dad and said wait up dad I have these for you. He finally came to a stop in front of my grandparents old house, put the kick stand out and set his bike down. I then kept saying "hello, dad can you hear me? I'm talking to you" no answer "I have been chasing you for the past few blocks." Still no answer. My dad then turns around looks me in the eyes like he always did and said, "dont worry about me." I told him "huh?" He spoke again and said "dont worry about me, I'm in a better place." This dream felt so real that when I was dreaming my eyes had started getting teary and I woke up to tears in my eyes. Opinions? Advice? I could use either

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I've had dreams of people who have passed away several years ago, but who were quite important figures in my childhood. I guess I still miss them, wish they were still here, and all. But in a weird way, they're still with me... lol I never thought that they were *that* much with me that I'd see them in my dreams, but yes. They're part of you.

Robstar I actually sleep om my side more often than my back, the stress of my father passing could be the culprit but it happened actually more frequently with my father alive (no I am not saying he's the problem cause hes.not) I have even tried the the trick and I got up on my bed from my side sleeping pattern and was pushed back down even when moving it doesn't snap me out of it I have to have someone talk to me, touch me, or just go back to sleep. In fact one time I was having my sleeping paralysis episode and my sister walked in and touched me to wake me up. I didn't notice her until she touched me even then I couldn't more my body just my head.

I don't think I've had anything quite as extreme as that for a while, although I did used to get strange 'experiences' of me in lying in bed where my body felt like it was twisting/turning or trying to lift up which was very frightening and seemed quite violent. I seemed to know what was going on but couldn't do anything. Fighting it made it worse.
I did get to the point where if I had one, (which was always in the middle of the night) then I stopped fighting, and tried to relax where this helped enormously in my case.
Like you say, you may be more prone to it. I don't know what triggered mine off, etc. I don't think anxiety or a poor sleeping routine helps. (The only main clue I had that I personally noticed was at one stage where if I was going to bed really late, feeling really (mentally) tired then my mind would not shut down, and I was getting all this 'mental chatter'/hypnagogic imagery as I dropped off to sleep. I always knew I was in for an eventful or bad night!)
I told some 'friends' about this one time, where the one girl honestly thought I was mad, judging by the look on her face!
Obviously I mentioned my 'experiences' which doesn't help you directly, although it might help shed some light; I'm not sure?
What I did try however is an exercise, a Wiccan friend told me about quite a while back now. When I was having one of these 'experiences' and I was really frightened, was to imagine a protective ball or bubble of white or bluish light energy around you, so you felt safe in your own space. However it depends on your belief systems, etc.
I have read somewhere (on DV I think?), someone trying the notion of simply telling one of these 'entities' (or hallucinations) to simply 'go away' or even asking 'it' why was it here? What did it want?
Mind you (regarding the above) then saying and doing are two different things. I for one have never (thankfully) had to put that to the test, or try it! However it is worth considering if you can muster the courage and strength.
One last thing is you could always try to turn it into a positive and try and visualise good memories and maybe enter a lucid dream?
There is not really anything else I can think of really.

Remember grief can be a long painful process for all involved. Don't be afraid to share it with a close family member, or someone you trust, rather than bottle it all up.
I hope things work out. :)