Dreaming With The Deceased

I stumbled upon this website a few days ago and was intrigued by its premise. July 24th, last month, my older brother passed away because of injuries that came as a result of a motorcycle accident. He was 22 years old, and I have spent every day of my life (18 years) by his side. Since his passing, I have had 3 lucid dreams with him in it-one was a memory recall type dream where I experienced a week's worth of mornings waking up and seeing him in his bed then eating breakfast with him and tagging along with him to run errands. In the other two, I was talking to him like usual as if he were still alive, but at a certain point I became lucid and aware that he was actually deceased and began to discuss it with him. He mentioned something about a contract in one, and when I became lucid in the other dream, I actually held his hands and cried in his arms before I woke up.

What do you guys think? Could deceased beings actually interact with us in our dreams, or is it simply our mind replaying and scrambling up memories? He never liked being touched or hugged, as a matter of fact, the only time I hugged him was when he took me for a ride on his motorcycle and I had to. I think that dreams are one of the ways that we could interact with loved ones who have passed on, and these 3 lucid dreams have given me the greatest relief for the endless grief that I will have to live with for the rest of my life.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by dBonachea

What do you guys think? Could deceased beings actually interact with us in our dreams, or is it simply our mind replaying and scrambling up memories? [/b]

---

Yes and yes. This is the place where the living join the dead. The best and worst dreams I've had involved "realitycally" correct dreams where I met dead or dying family members. Maybe this provides a foundation for their continuing lives.

On the other hand, it could just be your imagination comforting you.

I think dreams is a possible explanation for the possibility of life after death. That is why I try not to mess around too much in reality like dreams involving dead people (unless they mess with me, then, no mercy, let their god handle it).

What i'm going to say might sound weird now.
i work in a nursing home, looking after old people. When they die, i often dream about them after they've died.
in a weird kinda way, it helps me to deal with it better.
Last night i dreamed of a man that died with us just recently, and i dreamed that i went to his funeral with his family, except he was still alive (thus present at his own funeral) and i woke up feeling comforted, for the fact that his family are always going to have their memories of him, and maybe it would ease the pain of it for them...

I'm very sorry to hear about your brother. I still see and talk to my sister 20 years later but not nearly as often as I would like to. I know I dreamed about her a lot more in the past but a lot of those dreams have faded. I think you should record and hold onto these dreams that you have now.

Thanks everyone. I think that if we can communicate to another plane of non physical existence, it would probably be through dreaming, since it involves our subconscious mind and awareness. Everything just feels really really strange without him and all I could do is think about him. I have his helmet and shredded jacket in a garbage bag sitting in the back of my closet, and whenever i dig up the nerve to take a peek at them, for some reason i dont really fall apart in tears. I guess seeing these things dont bother me because they represent something that was his passion, and brought out his good side. Whenever he came back from a ride he was smiling ear to ear and was always more open to conversation than usual.

I'd really like to improve my lucid dreaming capacity so I could be receptive as possible to whatever he's trying to tell me. I've been working on my dream recall alot lately and havent missed a dream yet, maybe i'll start trying WILD and jotting down my recalls between awakenings.

I wouldn’t recommend trying to willingly initiate contact through dreams. You already have a good experience and probably have communicated all that was needed for both of you to go on peacefully.

For the helmet and jacket, I would probably bring the jacket to his resting place after one year and the helmet after five. I’d frame a picture of him on his bike with a cut piece of his jacket for my memento.

Take care.

Quote:

---

For the helmet and jacket, I would probably bring the jacket to his resting place after one year and the helmet after five. I’d frame a picture of him on his bike with a cut piece of his jacket for my memento.[/b]

---

I dont like that idea because some douchebag might steal it, or the cemetary would confiscate it. I just wouldnt be at peace with that kind of stupidity, i'd rather hold onto it and make some sort of memorial in his room. I already got the frame of him on his other bike and the gloves he was wearing during the accident. And I could honestly say that im not at peace with anything right now and in a very bizarre state of confusion.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by dBonachea

And I could honestly say that im not at peace with anything right now and in a very bizarre state of confusion.
[/b]

---

I know the feeling. :sad2:

I suggest you write a letter to your brother to tell him the things you loved most about him and how he positively influenced you personally in your life.

Write another one to god or the universe or yourself (your belief) and express how and why you are angry about the situation.

End both letters with "Love, your name".

Burn the letters when you are done (at a campfire with friends preferably but a lighter will do). It worked for me.

Hug.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by dBonachea

What do you guys think? Could deceased beings actually interact with us in our dreams, or is it simply our mind replaying and scrambling up memories?

[/b]

---

The whole premise behind Catholic Sainthood is that souls live beyond the grave AND continue to interact with the living.

When my father-in-law died, he'd still 'come back' to fix the heating system in his house (at the time I was serving overseas, and my wife was living with her mother-n-law).

Cats that have passed away often come back for a good-bye visit.

Since my parents have died, I often meet with them in my dreams.

I've spent years with Eastern Philosophy and Spirituality and often meet up with relatively famous Dead Gurus in my dreams.

Is it imagination? Well, one needs to wonder about the creative and unique communications one experiences. The Materialist Assumption is that the Subconscious Mind is so much more creative than the Conscious Mind, but the Spiritualist Assumption is more intuitively agreeable, and accounts for the uniqueness of communications by agreeing that they come from Minds other than our own.

As much as I would LIKE to believe that deceased loved ones return in our Dreams, the most assumable theory to me is that they are our OWN memories of them, and the Goodbye visits to be our own Desires: Something that is very re-occuring in dreams.

However I have never had such an experience where I could say with full conviction that a deceased Loved one REALLY visited me in my dreams other than that he/she was just an Illusion of my own Desire and Memory.

I am open to the idea that it may be possible, only I have yet to experience such a conclusive Dream myself.


As for your Brother...maybe the Contract your Brother mentioned in that Dream Symbolises something the way the Subconcious Mind always does. I guess You'd know best. As for Crying in his arms seems like a Typical Desire being Manifested in your own Dreams: Off course you would love to Hold him again and cry about his Unfortunate Death.

Don't go chasing Ghosts and Unreachable Desires though. It can drive one mad. BUT I am open to the Idea that it may be truely possible to actually ''contact'' deceased loved ones in Dreams. If you have more of these dreams, perhaps one of them will be so strange and Conclusive that you can actually with full; conviction be able to tell it really wasn't your own Mind that made it seem so real.

Keep Dreaming. So will I. But never be fooled by Illusions of your own desire. Don't think of these dreams other than Manifestations of your own Unfulfillable Desire to see him again untill you have a Dream that assures you for the full 100% that he indeed IS with you in your Dreams. Mind you Dreams and DreamCharacters can be deceiving.

I am sorry to hear of all these losses. :(
I have come to my own mental state of being resolved and resolute. I had struggled with this same question.
I have determined that it does not matter from where these dreams originate. Through this interaction via or dreams, I take them each as an experience.
My non- lucid dreams with my passed on loved ones are often nightmares. Which sucks.
If I do become lucid I try to enjoy each experience I have with that person regardless if it is a figment of my imagination or by some other means.

Sure, enjoy the experiences with deceased loved ones in dreams: Dreams arent real? well They're real ENOUGH to me. However see it as a Dream only as it is not possible in harsh reality. It would only be no good if you were to wake up in tears being all disappointed. Stay in touch with Reality and Charish those dreams as loose enjoyable moments that aren't connected to every day reality.