• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. Musical Keyboard Distortions and Distractions

      by , 09-13-2017 at 12:38 PM
      Morning of September 13, 2017. Wednesday.



      The main setting of my dream seems to be a larger variation of our bedroom in the house on Stadcor Street in Brisbane, where we have not lived in years. This seems to be the more dominant awareness of such due to that house’s kitchen being nearby in my dream’s layout and somewhat similar to real life, though there is also a vague association with the southwest Cubitis bedroom.

      In addition to a young version of my wife Zsuzsanna, there are four female “angels” or devoted “dream servants” present, though their behavior is atypical as my dream is non-lucid and they seem like my “protectors” as well (this being a non-lucid subliminal carryover from the nature of apex lucidity and unrelated to my real life). One of them is the (retired) actress Leelee Sobieski, seeming about twenty-five. I eventually become annoyed with her as she seems to have a contrary mindset at one point. I bump into Leelee while I am intimate with Zsuzsanna (while Leelee is facing away from us). This physical contact annoys Leelee and her annoyance annoys me (and makes me suspicious yet not lucid), so I conclude her “devotion” is pretense despite her being a “guardian”. However, any perception of conflict soon fades.

      In a scene in the kitchen, I have an electronic musical keyboard. I am thinking about recording some music for a new track. My mother is now present. (My dream self does not recall that she had died in 2002.) Pressing some of the keys, I see that one of them (seemingly a B key near the center of my keyboard) seems either loose or stuck due to the power cord somehow having been wrapped under the key. My mother tells me that she had done this (though unknowingly causing the problem), which makes me very annoyed as I am not sure if the key can be fixed as it seems broken or at least different in response to the other keys. I still want to play some music.

      I soon notice a tiny hairless creature that I first think is dead. It is lying between the A and B keys near the middle of my keyboard. I feel a sense of disgust in thinking that it may be a small rat fetus. However, over time, it begins to move and then breathe and gasp. “Oh…It’s a dog fetus,” I say aloud to the others present in casual matter-of-fact observation.

      Earl (an older half-brother on my mother’s side) is soon present. (My dream self does not recall that he had died in 2007.) The tiny hairless puppy, not much bigger than my thumb, is making unusual motions with its mouth (reminiscent of the “baby” in the movie “Eraserhead” from 1977). I wonder if it will even live, but I consider that Earl should put it with its mother to suckle. I have a wholly unexplainable false memory that Earl has a small dark gray cairn terrier that is likely its mother. The tiny “puppy” has an unusual brief feature on the top of its head that looks like an angular cap (though without the brim) of the kind a policeman or postman would wear, though it blends in with its head like an actual darker physical feature relating to its minimal fur. I know that my mind is creating this association somehow but it does not trigger lucidity.

      In the last scene, I have a meal with the four “angels”, Zsuzsanna, my mother, and Earl. My keyboard seems unrealistically bigger and oversized, and we seem to be using it as a table. Along with other food, which seems mostly normal to me, I also seem to have eaten much of the puppy except for its head, though the imagery is quite magnified. I feel a bit strange, but then I realize it is not the original puppy, but a “copy” of it, and that the “real” one is with its mother. At this point, my dream becomes more abstract and fades without a direct waking prompt.



      Foundational dream state indicators (no present relevance to real life): Our previous bedroom in Brisbane synthesized with my parents’ bedroom of Cubitis is simply based on concurrent subliminal threads of awareness of having gone to bed and additionally perceiving Zsuzsanna and I as parents.

      There are multiple reasons as to why Leelee Sobieski appeared in this dream, yet all of them unrelated to real-life symbolism and linked directly to the Reticular Activating System and real-time preconscious dynamics of the dream state. Reason number one stems from having briefly and randomly looked at details on IMDb of the 2007 movie “Walk All Over Me”. I only watched the first few minutes (and will watch it later with Zsuzsanna). She plays Alberta and appears as a cashier in the first few minutes, and the preconscious sometimes takes the form of a cashier to symbolize “checking out” of the dream state (as a lifelong recognized RAS function). Reason number two stems from her role in the 1998 movie “Deep Impact”, which has a theme analogous to the cessation of the dream state (“end of the world” association, symbolically unrelated to real life in this case). Reason number three comes from her role as Joan of Arc as associated with “divine voices and visions” and being in the dream state. Reason number four stems from her no longer being in movies as analogous to the waking precursor (“watching movies” as analogous to dreaming, though there may also be a play on “retired” as in going to bed).

      The power cord wrapped under the key is a dream state indicator (unrelated to present waking life) that no pretend “dream interpreter” could possibly have a clue about. Here is why: When I lived in America, I sometimes used to script dreams in real time by using affirmations in a digital sampling keyboard and did in fact, cause a key to stay down with the power cord holding it. In fact, the irony of this plays off of itself. In one real-time scripted vivid dream when I was young, I was distracted in trying to find the real audio source in order to turn it off. I was in a hallway with various doors and could not tell where the real sound was coming from. This is possibly one of the most hilarious failures of critical thinking skills in an otherwise vivid lucid dream.

      The last part of my dream is based on new ideas in my approach to newer music (as symbolized by the puppy needing to develop more). It is also an odd form of coalescence in “feeding off” my dream state (and the dream self coalescing back into consciousness). Also, as in uncountable past dreams, I was vaguely aware that I was consciously creating my dream (even though I was not lucid in any viable way), mostly only vaguely discernible in the scene where my focus on the “dead rat fetus” willed it to change into the living tiny hairless puppy. The focus on it coming to life and breathing relates to both waking up and very mild sleep apnea that is usually not a problem for me. Additionally, there are “end markers” here I do not typically go into detail about in an entry. For example, the B key represents the end of an octave and where there is no black key to the right of it, as a play on coming out of the unconscious state of dreaming, no more liminal space implied by the next white C key after the white B key.


    2. Comic Books in the Rain and Matchbox Cars

      by , 07-15-2017 at 06:00 AM
      Morning of July 15, 2017. Saturday.



      My dream starts out on the porch of the Barolin Street house (our previous home of where we have not lived since 2008). This is atypical, as the porch setting, though representing liminal space, is linked to the induction stage rather than the waking transition. As such, it begins to rain (water induction, my most common type, as water symbolizes the real-time dynamics of sleep). I enjoy its essence but I then realize that there are several small stacks of comic books in the north side yard, probably only four or five comic books in each of about nine stacks. Many seem to be Harvey comic books, such as “Casper the Friendly Ghost”. They are arranged in mostly an equidistant pattern (of about six inches apart to each direction) on a very low-set table or thin plywood platform. Zsuzsanna is with me. I realize that I have to run and get them so that they are not ruined.

      When I go out into the rain, I feel very good, even though I have to act quickly. Curiously, the books show no signs of getting wet as I gather them. After I take them onto our porch, my dream changes, and there are far less threads of my conscious self identity present.

      I now seem to be about eighteen years old or younger. My mother is still alive (and I have absolutely no recall of her having died in 2002). Strangely, even though my brother Earl did not die until November 29, 2007, I perceive him (via a false memory and false backstory) as having died when I was a teenager. (Therefore, my mother being alive in my dream and Earl being deceased is a typical error that dreams make all the time.)

      The setting is very sparse in detail and so undefined, there is no discernment of whether it is indoors or outdoors or the typical ambiguous combination that my dream self somehow always perceptually resolves. This “impossible” thinking pattern is not viable when I am fully conscious, and remains a distortion native to the dream state only (though I really cannot understand how this could work despite critical thinking skills not existing in most non-lucid dream types).

      My mother is present at times, including the very last scene. I mostly look at various Matchbox Cars. These are ones my brother Earl supposedly owned while living in Cubitis. (Although I still continuously have dreams based on variations of Cubitis, where I have not lived since the summer of 1978, dreaming of Earl’s house in Cubitis, which was only a few houses south of us, is quite rare.) Earl is present in some sort of ghost form, but otherwise appears to be normal, as he was in perhaps the late 1960s. He only looks on at my activities at times.

      Yet another error in this dream is that I see Earl as being married to his third wife Cindy in this time period (and she is “still” living in his Cubitis house) rather than his first wife Beverly (and in fact, I have no awareness of him being married to anyone else). His ghost form seems to be a natural result of dying; that is, people die, and then they exist as visible “ghosts”, set apart from the physical world, but otherwise just as they were when alive.

      I open a long rectangular cardboard box that is a racing set based on Matchbox Cars. There is a blue racing car that I look at for a short time. I do not think Earl will be angry as I look at his collection.

      In the last scene, my mother is nearby. I play around with two blue Matchbox Car pickup trucks that are identical except for the position of the wings of the oversized white chicken sitting in each pickup truck bed. I get the impression it might be meant to be an advertising gimmick (possibly for KFC). One chicken’s wings are out and horizontal while the other’s wings are down and against its body. The chickens also rotate to spin around the pickup truck bed, and I start spinning them prior to waking.



      Although this non-lucid dream is extraordinarily easy to decode the native meaning of as most of my non-lucid dreams are, I will presently only focus on the last amusing segment. Chickens are birds that cannot fly very well, so are a typical example of “failed flight” (a form of “return flight”) waking symbolism. This is not negative and has nothing to do with conscious self “issues” as “dream interpreters” (not a real concept) seem to like to pretend via the Barnum effect. Waking symbolism as such is an indicator of the anticipatory (though subliminal) nature of hypnopompia, which is a biological process. As a result, bird and airplane symbolism (and flying in general) has been extremely common in my dreams since earliest memory, for over fifty years, continuously occurring in over one in five dreams in the tens of thousands I have studied.

      In this one, there is even an obvious dream sign play, the pickup truck BED, an indicator of being in the dream state, even more so with the oversized chickens on them. Pairs of birds (of various species) have occurred in a number of my dreams. They represent, in most cases, Zsuzsanna and I sleeping together. They are different in their wing status (and in different pickup trucks) in this case due to Zsuzsanna and I being in different levels of sleep (in real time). My mother as my emergent consciousness is likely a vague association with Zsuzsanna prior to waking (as she is a mother to our children). Beds (sometimes in unusual locations) as real-time dream state indicators are also common in Zsuzsanna’s dreams.


      Updated 07-15-2017 at 09:00 AM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    3. My Brother’s Former Dog

      by , 07-04-2016 at 01:04 PM
      Morning of July 4, 2016. Monday.



      I am visiting my brother Earl (May 23, 1940-November 29, 2007; half-brother on my mother’s side) and his family mostly as they were in the late 1980s. It seems to be the Saint Cloud Street house except that there is another house adjoined to it on the west side of it with an unlikely unlocked door in the middle of the living room wall, that one can actually go into the other house through.

      A dog is heard whining, the sound of which carries through the walls and closed door. It turns out to be my brother’s former dog that he had given to his neighbors previously, perhaps months earlier. My sister-in-law seems annoyed. (This dog was a black Labrador named Gypsy. He had it in Florida when I was a boy and had kept it indoors at my sister Marilyn’s house for a time in late 1978 when he was living in a place for a time that did not allow dogs. For some reason, it would bark furiously at my brother-in-law when he came home from work though did not actually attack. He had a different dog at the Saint Cloud Street address though, which had seizures and would start shaking and just fall over at times though quickly recovered each time, thus this dream confuses the two.)

      My brother opens the door to go directly into his neighbor’s house and he leaves the door open. This makes me feel a bit strange, as it seems like a severe imposition. His neighbors are apparently not home, though I consider that one of them, an older male, may still be in bed, but this is only a vague possibility in the back of my mind - no evidence manifests. My brother goes in and gets the dog and makes comments about its nature and how his neighbors may not have been looking after it properly or feeding it enough. He carries it in an impossible way. It sits across his upheld hands somewhat like a statue, only about the size of a large cat, in lying position, and it whines and shakes very oddly. He takes it into another room of his house in the back. The door to the adjoined neighbor’s house remains open and I continue to reflect on what an imposition this is on my brother’s part. I feel a bit wary with possible upcoming embarrassment should these people return home and see the door open as such.



      Updated on Thursday, 10 August 2017. The doorway waking symbolism here is oddly sustained. My emergent consciousness is not rendered as a dog very often, especially a nervous dog. However, this dream predicted certain aspects of my physical body a year later (related to unexplainable anxiety, which I only had at one other point in my life in my twenties). It is also an interesting marker because July 4th (the date of this dream) also relates to pets such as dogs and cats being spooked by fireworks and sometimes running off and remaining lost for a time.


    4. The Electric Imp (TS)

      by , 09-05-1982 at 03:05 PM
      Morning of September 5, 1982. Sunday.



      There is some sort of creature or imp that lives in a cupboard under the kitchen sink at my brother Earl’s house in Florida (though he had not lived there for several years in reality), though which later seems to be in Wisconsin at a motel. My dream and the offset sequence seems to take place in late morning.

      The creature, which is apparently made of electricity, projects small bolts of lightning up through the drain somehow (as if the pipe is not there and the creature is directly under where the water would flow). However, I am never directly threatened by the imp and the lightning seems mostly inconsequential. I visualize the imp as probably only being about a foot tall.

      At one point, he sounds like a human talking, but with a sort of hollow or metallic sound. It seems that Earl will be unlikely to live in the apartment anymore until the “electric imp” is gone. I do not see this imp at any point, only the smaller patterns of lightning coming out of the drain now and then. Although the imp may be talking to me (though I do not focus on what it is saying), I do not speak at any point in this dream or the following offset segment.



      In an offset dream, though still part of the same sequence (without waking), I find myself in an unknown parking lot (though is possibly near Shopko on the north side of La Crosse). I see Earl sitting in the back seat of an unknown car, on the right-hand side. His face seems distorted, without the potential for it to be a real human face (which my dream self finds inconsequentially puzzling). Still, he reminds me of a handicapped male in a television commercial from years ago, who said, “I’m a little tired. I’m alright though,” when emerging from the water of a large indoor swimming pool.



      The last scene is a transmuted water lowering waking symbol (subliminally associated with someone emerging from water as analogous to leaving the dream state), even though the electric imp was already a factor of water lowering waking symbolism. A parking lot is also a common waking space symbol for me, though typically the second-from-last dream of the sleeping period (as this was) while a porch is typically the final waking symbolism setting of a sleeping period.



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, water induction and water as symbolizing sleep 2, kitchen as subliminal hunger symbol 1, right-oriented waking symbolism 2, brother Earl 1, lightning as RAS to emergent consciousness precursor 1, soft awakening 2, parking lot as waking space symbol 1, drain as liminal space divider 1, subliminal rendering of waking prompt 1, water lowering waking symbolism 1, motel as liminal space transition precursor 1, impossible face 1


      Updated 01-23-2018 at 10:34 AM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid