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    1. Unconvincing Resurrection

      by , 10-18-2016 at 04:18 PM
      Morning of October 18, 2016. Tuesday.



      My wife Zsuzsanna and our children as we appear now are living in the Loomis Street house, though I have no memory of my relatives who actually lived there. We hear loud voices from upstairs a few times. It turns out to be at least two young males, possibly college students.

      I am outside near the (south) side of the house when I hear some yelling in the upstairs apartment but I do not see anyone. Just as I go back into the house via the front door, one of the unknown males is suddenly there yelling as if he thought I was spying on him just by me being outside. This is the personified preconscious but I am fully non-lucid and do not recognize the essence at this point.

      I soon go outside when he is no longer present. I am carrying my large barbell bar. I end up getting my second one because I soon see that the other two males have a couple near the back of the house, sticking out through the door of the laundry room (which is not logical as it is our living area not theirs) though they do not pick them up when they come into the backyard. I hold both my bars up as if for a sword fight. I decide to steal their two barbells, and, along with my two, put them in a (fictional) attic in the house where they cannot get to them. I tell them this directly. The attic is full of features that I falsely recall are mine, including bed frames (dream sign).

      We get into a fight and I knock one of them out; the one who had been yelling at our front door earlier (personified preconscious). While the other male stands on the back concrete step for the back door, I end up putting a dagger horizontally through his neck. Still, I feel a little bad about this because he is much younger than me.

      Still in the backyard, I place his body in a bucket that is full of water (which of course is very unrealistic as how could someone fit in a bucket). Somehow, the water does not spill out. I decide I will resurrect him.

      After I focus more, with the intent to bring the character back, I look down and notice a skull in the bucket (not logical as he was not in skeletal form when put in). Soon however, a long white balloon with a sketchy skeleton design on it slowly rises up from the water as if being pumped up with a bicycle pump. This seems a bit strange to me but does not puzzle me a lot or trigger any significant thoughts. I get the impression that the character goes back to normal in vague liminal space during the waking stage.



      Because this involves water induction and resurrection, I will assume that this character is my personified conscious self (as it had been determined long ago that the personified preconscious is sometimes a partner to the personified conscious self as a precursor to resolved emergent consciousness in a non-lucid dream, the dream self being the personified subconscious regardless of the “I am” identity - this being obvious because the personified subconscious or dream self cannot remember much at all, unless of course more threads of the conscious self are present). On one level, this could be subliminal reinduction (especially as water is involved); an attempt to “bring my dream back to life”.


    2. Watching Dinosaurs and Playing Around With My Own Skeleton

      by , 10-10-2015 at 11:39 AM
      Morning of October 10, 2015. Saturday.



      This is a set of three shorter dreams in which one shifted into the other with only partial wakefulness.

      The first involves being at an unknown location near a river bank. My wife Zsuzsanna and I are watching alligators swim through the water every now and then, just under the surface. A few other people are walking around. The alligators do not really seem threatening. Eventually I notice how a few of them look very different from normal alligators, though mostly around the head. I point out that it seems someone is apparently doing strange experiments with dinosaur DNA or possibly even living dinosaurs and alligators, as each alligator seems to have minor features from a known dinosaur, one having a head somewhat like a Tyrannosaurus, the other like a Styracosaurus, though flatter and more alligator-like. I even manage to pull the Styracosaurus alligator out of the water and partly onto the bank so that I can show people what I mean.

      After a partial awakening and back into sleep, my wife and children and I are back on Barolin Street, except that all of the houses north of ours (as in reality) are gone and the area is replaced by a large field of mostly short grass and which is bordered by a fence adjacent to the sidewalk. Only a few other people are around farther to the north.

      An unnaturally large Tyrannosaurus, probably about twice as large as any real one ever was, is walking about in the field as if being kept there by the small fence, which is only about the height of an average human waist. I see another Tyrannosaurus nearby, about three lots beyond the first one. In the back of my mind, I sense a part of myself contemplating how I will change my dream from an uneventful one into one where we are chased by the dinosaurs. (This vague awareness of making my dream in real time which also occurs with clearer awareness in indescribable abstract dreams has occurred since early childhood, though there is no hint of lucidity otherwise.)

      The Tyrannosaurus moves his head down, leaning forward, and smashes down the tiny fence with his head, as if the tiny fence was somehow keeping him in the field when all he needed to do was just step over it without even noticing. I find this scene somewhat comedic, pondering the seeming low intelligence of the creature. I tell everyone that we need to go back to our house, as the dinosaur is now loose. It is soon moving very fast in our direction though the other one seems to be considering which direction to go (as there are more unknown people to the north). We go onto our porch, though the door to the main entrance and hallway is locked. From here, I non-lucidly manipulate my dream by rewinding it, pausing it, and jumping about in terms of sections of previous events.

      In my next dream, we are inside the Barolin Street house, in the living room, I think. I am near the center of the room sitting on the floor. For some reason, I am practicing my firing of projectiles, which are actually finger bones from my hand. I somehow pop them out from my skeletal hand and fire them across the room (with a force that carries them to the wall, a few hitting a desk). I do this at least twelve times with all twelve of the phalanges of my right hand (not counting my thumb). I somehow continue with my left hand (not realizing it would not be possible as my right fingers are all gone). Looking down at my own skeleton, I see that I must have also already used some of my ribs at an earlier date. It is no problem, as I will eventually probably snap all my bones back into place later on.

      (This may have something to do with the difficulty we had in snapping together the life-sized Billy Bones model kit a few months ago.)
    3. The Final Night of Billy Bones

      by , 08-19-2015 at 02:19 PM
      Morning of August 19, 2015. Wednesday.

      Dream #: 17,775-02. Reading time: 1 min 50 sec.



      In my dream, my family and I are living on Barolin Street. However, my Cubitis home’s location (railroad track area only) seems to be a part of the setting later.

      Billy Bones, the child-sized human anatomy model, has issues. It needs to have its bones and organs put back in after having fallen out. (In real life, building this kit requires strength and patience.)

      I begin to consider the fragility of something so expensive, wondering how long it will last. The model falls apart. I decide to get rid of it, though it is too big to put in the bin. I do not want all the separate pieces to get scattered, as I might step on one and hurt my foot.

      It is near nightfall. Billy Bones is now a pile of rubble (rather than bits of plastic and metal). There is also an unexplainable organic substance I do not want to touch. There is a sense of bilocation when the area near the railroad tracks seems to be inside our house. I ambiguously perceive I am indoors and outdoors at the same time, though the setting does not have a clear definition as previously.

      I eventually decide the best place to leave the mess is in the middle of the railroad tracks a short distance from our home. I should bury it under the rocks of the trackbed. At this point, I notice that the pile of rubble has more substantial pieces of Billy again, including much of the rib section, part of the hand, and possibly a kidney. That annoys me, as I thought the mess would be less obvious to associate with a human form (in case someone confuses it with real bones). My dream fades from here.



      Important: Note where my dream self decided to bury Billy Bones in the last scene. Note the play on “bed” (trackbed). Ultimately Billy Bones is this dream’s sleep simulacrum (the subliminal indication of being asleep). Physicality in the dream state is imaginary and incohesive.



      As an added note, I found it amusing when I knew no one would go on to purchase the integumentary system (“skin”) for Billy Bones (by extending their subscription) which had never been advertised up to that point. Zsuzsanna talked to a cashier at the local newsagency, and they told her that everyone in town canceled their Billy Bones subscription when the bones and organs model was complete. After all, with “skin,” the model would look like a cheap plastic mannequin or dummy in contrast to the bones and organs displaying as an anatomy model as advertised. No one likes deception from a company that wants to obtain as much money as they can get, so Billy Bones remains Billy Bones, not Billy Dummy.



    4. Not a Skeleton (or a skeleton transforms into books)

      by , 08-26-1997 at 02:26 PM
      Morning of August 26, 1997. Tuesday.



      I dreamt of a skeleton that was buried in Cubitis (where I have not lived since 1978). The identity of the skeleton remains unknown. A strong wind blows dirt from it as I watch. Eventually, instead of a skeleton, it turns out to be edges of many interesting magazines and books. (Human remains becoming something else over time, or having been something else even when there does seem to be a real change, has been a sparsely recurring dream event.)



      Because skeletons, ghosts, and similar concepts relate to unfocused conscious awareness within a dream when books define a clearer conscious focus (though I do not become lucid), such a dream symbolizes increasing neural activity towards waking. Wind represents the passage of time.


      Categories
      non-lucid
    5. Pelican Skeleton

      by , 11-03-1979 at 05:03 PM
      Morning of November 3, 1979. Saturday.



      A living pelican skeleton walks about in my family’s living room in Cubitis (though I was living in Wisconsin by this time in real life). My dream is very intense and vivid, with an augmented sense of wonder, but not eerie despite the imagery. There is a vibrant positive energy present. The pelican skeleton eventually jumps up onto a dresser (along the west wall of the living room) and then spends time seemingly looking at itself in a mirror (perhaps in puzzlement of its “twin” in the mirror) and moving its wings of bone. I am also vaguely aware of other activity in the room, something like small balls rolling around and possibly small mammals of which I do not directly focus upon.

      It seems very alive and vibrant, as if I am viewing the scene through some sort of x-ray vision. There is a lot of energy in my dream, and other events are happening, but this is the main one and the focus of my dream at its most vivid level. (It reminds me, in conscious afterthought, of an image from the Time-Life book “The Birds”, which I had since I was very young.



      This dream is a unique version of the otherwise typical type of autosymbolism in the last segment of my dreams that relates to associations with vestibular system ambiguity and not knowing where my physical body is in unconsciousness. Although there is a lesser semi-lucidity here, my dream self typically does not have viable access to either my unconscious or viable memory or thinking skills, or viable awareness of my conscious self in waking life. This, in fact, is why the mirror is rendered, as a mirror is a type of autosymbolism that represents this division of liminal space. The skeleton form represents how my dream self is not my complete conscious self in waking life, combined with the flight symbol that is precursory to the actual waking transition (and of which is rendered in over one in five of my dreams, at least once per sleep cycle).


      Updated 04-18-2018 at 06:28 PM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
    6. Grasshopper (Lisa’s “Return”)

      by , 09-06-1977 at 03:06 PM
      Morning of September 6, 1977. Tuesday.



      This was a long dream as a teen (seemingly with a few “resets” in the first versions), first dreamt in Cubitis in 1977. It recurred many times over several years (until the movie “The Fly” 1986 version was released and in which a scene matched my much older dream). The “soundtrack” of later versions was the music from the movie “The Black Hole” (1979) which I had the soundtrack record of.

      Lisa M and her family are moving back to Cubitis, having driven down Highway Seventeen from the south, though I am not sure why. It is seemingly midnight or just after when they pull stealthily into their driveway (of tiny broken up seashells, bits of clam shells, and sand). I run and inform my parents regardless of the later hour, with somewhat of a sense of awe. (In reality, ironically, she had begun public high school for the first time after her family moved - the same one I would have went to - but shortly after I stopped going.)

      In my dream, a fictional song called “Grasshopper” (supposedly by Kenny Rogers) was part of my “dream-movie’s” background music in later versions. (Two of the lines of the song were “When we were kids we used to play in the backyard” and “Grasshopper, grasshopper, come back to me” - slightly similar to the melody of “Matchmaker” from “Fiddler on the Roof” - possible association with the grasshopper fiddling in the “Ant and the Grasshopper” fable.)

      Over time, I learn of some unusual and disturbing issues; “this” Lisa was not the “original” Lisa; at one point, something to do with being right-handed or left-handed due to an injury from doing cartwheels, I think, which is based on a distorted memory of a story about losing virginity when doing too many cartwheels or riding a horse. The “new” Lisa is some sort of shape-shifting creature, possibly from another planet (though this is not certain). The grasshopper as a deuteragonist may be associated with Jiminy Cricket relative to morals and conscience (or presumed guilt), though greatly augmented.

      Later, a human skeleton is found in the concrete flower-box in front of where my bedroom is (outer west-most wall) when some new coleus plants are to be put in by my mother. Surprisingly, it turns out to be the real Lisa’s skeletal remains. It seems that the creature had somehow taken at least partial control of the parents to move “back home” to produce offspring. This mind control wears off at one point. (The focus on death is likely more about Jenny C, who was murdered about a month earlier by another male a couple years younger than me). This also loosely foreshadowed a real-life experience I had while fishing one morning. My mother had used plastic milk jugs as filler for the flower box. When I reeled my line in at one point, I mistook a plastic milk jug filled with sediment for a human skull, which gave me palpitations a temporary shock.

      The fake Lisa had vanished when the news was spread about the shape-shifting alien invader. I later (for reasons I am not certain of) communicate with her again very late at night. It turns out that the real Lisa had been deliberately replaced by the female grasshopper-like creature that could mimic people (much like the movie “Mimic” that came out years later but the creature being far more human-like in my dream).

      Earlier versions of my dream ended with the same scene as in the new version of “The Fly” (1986) where the large insect “foot”/leg moves out and comes down in the same way with the same timing, personal mood and reflection, and “color” upon my seeing the movie for the first time. There is one final scene where a small white shaggy dog (unknown Maltese) is barking at the creature as I fall backwards in my presumed “death”. (This turns out to have been precognitive of my wife’s life as related in the June 2014 dream “A Long Journey with my Wife”.)

      Parts of later versions of my dream seemed similar to scenes from “Five Million Years to Earth” (1967) as well (“Quatermass and the Pit”). She becomes a mother and produces thousands of locust-like creatures that destroy the world; nothing but empty trees and bare ground as far as the eye can see, which again, uses the soundtrack from “The Black Hole” (same ending theme to my “dream movie”). Grasshopper-like creatures leap around almost like a sense of playful horses from an underside view, but…no more people, ever (other than myself). (There is no logical pondering of what will happen when all the vegetation is gone, which would likely be not that far into the future as I already see a lot of leafless trees over the infested landscape.)

      Updated 12-28-2015 at 03:44 AM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
    7. Rediscovering and Decoding “The Sampler”

      by , 11-22-1975 at 05:22 PM
      Morning of November 22, 1975. Saturday.



      My dream starts out with a detailed backstory with fictional characters possibly implied to be living in Arcadia (as that is where the final event likely takes place). There is a family curse where an unfamiliar man of perhaps about thirty was warned, I believe by his grandmother (and possibly other family members), not to ever become a sailor or go near the ocean at any point in his life.

      There had been a sampler in his family for several generations which depicts rats leaving a ship that is implied to be destined to sink, which is hanging on display in a local museum. The edge of the boat is shown and the gangway is visible, with three rats on the gangplank in running position from upper left to lower right, diagonally positioned. This design also seems to represent the family’s coat of arms.

      Eventually, I become corporeal and part of the scenario. I am with my best friend Toby at a public gathering in an unfamiliar setting. He is seated to my right. The unknown man has decided to go to sea as a ship’s captain (apparently without moving up the ranks). He is dressed in a captain’s uniform and is explaining how he no longer believes in his family curse. There are at least two other speakers at the gathering. The speakers take turns sitting on chairs to the right of the podium (my left). There are probably less than twenty people at the indoor venue. The podium and speakers are perhaps about six feet from the first row of the audience, who sit on singular chairs.

      Time passes. There is an uneasy quiet growing, followed by an eerie clattering (reminiscent of wooden wind chimes), followed by another eerie silence. Toby is looking off to the right. I tap him to get his attention, saying his name. The unknown would-be captain has become a skeleton, now sagging slightly on his chair, still in his uniform, unmoving. A hush falls over the audience as the dream, now at its most vivid point, quickly fades.



      The preconscious personification, who never regarded me directly, was rendered as an unknown male who wanted to go to sea (return to sleep, as water represents the internal biology of sleeping and dreaming) as a captain (dictating control of his sleeping and waking habits). Instead, he became a skeleton to symbolize the cessation of the dream state and to activate the waking stage. This was foreshadowed by the sampler of the rats leaving the ship. Rats basically symbolize nighttime circadian rhythms (as they are primarily nocturnal, excluding pet rats) and the gangplank is actually oriented like a clock to represent a time around four or five o'clock in the morning. The sampler also implies leaving the potential to sail upon the ocean (analogous to not returning to sleep). Additionally, the background of the sampler was yellow, which represents sentience and a precursor to dawning consciousness (waking). This was my last longer and clearer dream of the morning. There was no fear created in this dream; just a subtle sense of awe and curiosity. The foundation for this dream was water induction (my most common dream induction).



      It is possible that my dream was influenced by a cover of DC’s “Ghosts” comic book (volume one issue nine, cover date November 1972), one that I had looked at fairly often, even though there is no implication of a ghost in this dream, only the skeleton as symbolic of the cessation of my dream.

      Updated 10-02-2016 at 09:01 AM by 1390

      Tags: rats, skeleton
      Categories
      memorable
    8. The Pole Vault Event

      by , 04-13-1970 at 10:13 AM
      Morning of April 13, 1970. Monday.



      Summary of meaning: In subliminal anticipation of the need to get up for school, my dream renders a school setting, but this is more about having the physical energy to wake up and start the day. My classmate goes through a time warp while pole vaulting and instantly becomes supposedly old skeletal remains. The hypnopompic physical event (back jab) lacks intensity, possibly because of the flight association and “rising above it” in the moment of waking. Still, the pole may be subliminally perceived as a pointy object and may have an association with the hypnopompic back jab.



      This was a shorter dream in childhood but quite vivid and eerie. I am not sure of the backstory or how it came in. My schoolmates and I were never involved in pole vaulting at any prior time in real life. The outcome is rather macabre. There is a slight possibility that the idea of pole vaulting is associated with magnetism (regarding north and south poles on a magnet) or time distortions caused by magnetic fields.




      I am seemingly near the high school building and area across from the primary school which I had been a student of in real life (West Elementary). A friend, D Smith, a black boy about my age, is running about and is going to be involved in a pole vault attempt. I do not seem to be engaged in any sport or practice of any kind; I am just standing around. There are hardly any other people around, mostly at least one male teacher or coach and a few other students and possibly a couple parents.

      (Somehow, I am aware that the bar is sixteen feet above the ground. This has been a recurring height distance which may relate to symbolism of possible measurement in Hz regarding Beta waves. Beta states are the states associated with normal waking consciousness. 16 Hz would be the last phase of Beta 1 power.)

      D begins the pole vault routine, running due south. However, when he goes up and over, he quickly ends up as “old” skeletal remains on the other side, along the side of the road (with a soft “gasp” or “sigh” from the others; no yelling occurs), which is near the sports area. I somehow perceive that he went through a time barrier.



      This is instant death waking symbolism, unrelated to day-to-day reality (as dreams do not really have “interpretations” as such). It simply means I am coming out of sleep, the symbolism of which is rendered in many different ways. It can also be typified as a form of exit flight waking symbolism, more specifically, failed flight waking symbolism in biological anticipation of physical (muscular) hypnopompic effects (which are spontaneous and cannot be controlled by will).


      Updated 08-13-2017 at 12:29 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid