Blue_Opossum

Morning of April 23, 2018. Monday.



While lying in our bed early this morning, I enter light sleep paralysis, which automatically brings me joy, a sense of well-being, and enhanced senses, though there is no imagery. I try to will the rising sensation I usually get upon focusing on this state, which usually begins with a tingling all over my body and an eventual sense of floating. This occurs and I feel weightless. I am aware of Zsuzsanna on my left. I try again. A second wave of tingling pleasure fills me.

Believing I am at least partly awake now (but still in a vivid dream state), I see a few random comic strip panels as if floating above me, facing downward. I read some words and word patterns, most of which are the typical gibberish, but the letters are very clear. One end panel says “TWIN” and below that, “TWN”. Another end panel begins with “Dream interpretation is misrepresentation…”.

I believe I am talking to Zsuzsanna about what I had seen, though my eyes are closed for a time. There is a real awakening of which quickly falls back into a false awakening. I seem to be in the Stadcor Street backyard (where we have not lived in years) in late morning, even though it also seems we are inside our present home in bed in semidarkness. (Being aware of two different lighting schemes simultaneously is not that common in my dreams, though it is basically just another aspect of bilocation caused by the conscious self identity being in the dream state.) I still believe that a part of me is awake enough to communicate with Zsuzsanna. A tingling moves through my body again and there is also a flashing. My hand is flashing as well. There is a very intense enhanced awareness. However, looking at the sky, I see a Klingon Bird-of-Prey hovering over the house and a 1950s flying saucer farther to the left. I laugh at my inability to realize that I had not stayed awake during this time. I then wake for a short time for real. My sexuality seems exponentially increased. I am going to have to play around and take advantage of the dream state for a little longer.

Still in very pleasant light sleep paralysis, I decide to augment the state again and hold my conscious self awareness intact as much as I can. I am then in the bedroom on Barolin Street (where we have not lived since 2008 - the house no longer there in reality). I deliberately become incorporeal for a time and decide to try a typical door experiment. I move through the house toward the front door, which is now a large locked steel vault door. I fly as fast as I can will myself to, headed straight to it. As I know it is a dream, and what the door represents (a liminal space barrier between different levels of consciousness and unconsciousness), I realize that one of two events will happen. Either I will wake upon reaching the door, or I will enter an even higher state of apex lucidity by phasing through it. The latter happens. Time seems to slow down and I phase through the door, enjoying the event. I marvel at the beauty of the event and my enhanced clarity of mind.

After phasing through the steel door, I find myself in front of an unfamiliar house late at night, looking back at the other side of the door. From here, I decide to walk and also to bring about daylight.

I reach an area with about ten people to my left, mostly sitting along the side of the road. Most of them are partly undressed. It might be some sort of family gathering. Being in apex lucidity, the dream characters are a bit “off” and “glitchy”. I am looking for Zsuzsanna or a reasonable facsimile of her. I see a girl sitting on an embankment but realize that it is not her. I notice that all of the people have small areas of odd patchy and scaly darker skin. This may be a RAS hybrid of snake (the core RAS modulation factor) and personification.

The preconscious (as an unknown male of about thirty) takes form and walks toward me and I am very annoyed, as I do not want to wake up yet. I immediately split him in two with the power of my thoughts and the sides fall in opposite directions. His partner comes over and seems upset. She looks down at the ground and seems unsure of what to say. I decide to will the pieces back together and walk off to another area.

I summon a sexual encounter. It seems to be a version of Zsuzsanna at first, but soon turns out not to be. She is wearing a cat costume. Unfortunately, she also expects me to interact with her virtual pet first, that she pulls out of a cloth bag, which is little more than a Fleshlight with a toy stuffed cat sewn around it. This greatly annoys me and I go elsewhere. (Otherwise, a cat is an emergent consciousness factor, though remains on the preconscious side of the door of liminal space.)

The people in this new area, half open building, half outdoors, are now taking on a more realistic appearance. Girls walk through a hall in a building of an unknown purpose. I am not sure if it is meant to be a college, hospital, train station, or all of the above. I summon Zsuzsanna and we indulge in pleasure, though I do not undress her. I go through the motions of undoing my pants (which is very strange as I am not dressed in reality and my faux conscious self model should know this). My manhood phases into her (through her clothes) as she leans back against the edge of a wall where a large room is to the left and the hall is to the right and we move together for several minutes. I have zero interest in the people walking around, though they do not regard us anyway. As I wake, I am holding Zsuzsanna close.

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