Blue_Opossum

Morning of June 26, 2018. Tuesday.



These are two dreams during the same sleep cycle. Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side who died in 2014) appears in both.

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In my first dream, I am back in the Loomis Street house. At times however, I also seem to be simultaneously present, at least in mind, in the Rose Street building (where I have not lived in real life since 1967 at age six). I am “remembering” it incorrectly though, which is usually the case in non-lucid dreams when thinking skills and viable memory (and viable contact with the unconscious mind) are not present. I am conversing with Marilyn about the Rose Street building (where she also lived in the 1960s across the hall from me and my parents).

The conversation focuses on the elevator that was, in my fictitious memory, near the back of the building. I discuss the elevator as well as the rickety steps (that were a real-life feature). I relate how my mother did not like me using that staircase. I talk more about the fictitious elevator. My dream eventually fades (without waking) and I am in a different dream scenario.

In my other dream, I am sitting on the floor in the Loomis Street dining room (where I have not been in real life since February 1994). I eventually end up drinking what I first believe to be solely soda, though from a large plastic bucket and with a long drinking straw that almost reaches the bottom of the bucket. Over time, I realize that there is more in the bucket than just soda. In fact, when I begin to focus, I realize that I drank a lot of water with laundry soap in it. In the bucket, there are also a couple of clothes (my pants and shirt, at least), a few Matchbox cars near the bottom, and other items as well as other liquids (such as orange juice) mixed in.

I mention this to Marilyn (who is in the living room near the front door) and my mother (who remains in the southwest area of the dining room) as I remain sitting on the floor. (My mother died in 2002.) I tell them how I do not feel any different after drinking this unlikely mixture of soda, laundry suds, and possibly other contents. I eventually notice a pile of clothes on the floor. I end up mostly lying on my right side, feeling very aware, and wondering if what I drank will affect me. I focus on my perception and there is a very vivid awareness but no lucidity. My dream soon fades.

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Despite my dream self not being viably lucid, I am still always aware on one level of when I am dreaming, as it is biologically impossible not to know I am dreaming. This changes the entire nature of what many people believe dreams to be.

Although my memory is not viable (because of being without viable contact with my unconscious mind while in the non-lucid dream state), there is a thread of memory of dream state autosymbolism. My dream self is actually describing dream state autosymbolism without being lucid. This has happened many times before even in childhood dreams. An elevator is autosymbolism for the dreaming and waking process. It has nothing to do with waking life “symbolism” (as dreams are not symbolic in the conventional sense).

My last dream also reveals liminal awareness of the dream state. This is evidenced by my position on the floor. Although I usually sleep on my left side, I had this dream while briefly sleeping on my right and I was mostly on my right as my dream ended. The rest is more about distortion from lack of viable joining of unconscious and conscious self identity. I also had mild indigestion in sleep and my dream was creating a ridiculous scenario to remind me of such. The laundry soap and loose clothes were present as a reminder I am not wearing clothes when I am asleep in bed.

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