Schmaven's Dream Journal of Randomness

In a crowded section of New York City, flames erupt from the sewers as Satan himself rises from hell and bursts through the pavement of the road ahead of me, sending cars flying through the air and people running and screaming in all directions. He has a gang of demons around him, all made of flames, forming a painful looking perimeter of death and destruction around the Devil.

I am holding a dark gray cat, almost black, with white on its face and some of its paws I don't remember picking it up, but it seems to like being held. I cradle it on its back like a baby in my left arm, against my side, and hold its tail out in front of me like a cannon. I aim it at the Devil and make my best "Pew Pew!" noises. Almost like a "pshhyeeeoo!!!" As I make my very best laser noises, bright blue laser beams shoot out of the cats tail. They move through the air at about the speed of a jogger, so Satan easily dodges them.

I run toward Satan, aiming the cat's tail a few paces ahead of him and with "Pew Pew Pew Pew!" shoot four slow moving lasers out of the cat's tail into Satan's path. I almost got him this time! With great enthusiasm I go wild with my best "Pew Pew!" noises, filling the streets and alleys with blue lasers. 'If I shoot lasers everywhere, I can't miss.' I tell myself.

Satan dives behind a sky scraper and out of sight. I pre-fire a few laser blasts from the cat's tail down the next street in case he tries to run for it, and then run down the alley to cut him off before he can get away. He gave me the slip somehow, and I haven't got a clue where to find him now. I find myself at a busy intersection, looking every which way as traffic flows through. Next to me is a fire fighter and a cop. They look at me, then at the cat I'm cradling in my arm, and then at how I'm holding the cat's tail out in front of me with my other hand, and then look back to me.
"Check this out" I tell them as I aim the cat's tail in a harmless direction and say "Pew Pew Pew!" sending three bright blue laser beams slowly through the air.
"That's pretty cool" they tell me.
"I know, right?!"
"Aren't you going to film it or take a picture or something?" The firefighter asks me.
"No, I don't think anyone really needs to know about this. Plus I've gotta get Satan"
They both give me an understanding nod, and I start walking away as I think about where to look.