Hopeless Wanderings

So, I only really post on my DJ when I have a dream that really sticks with me that I want to remember, and this was one of them. I think it came from watching the news about the guy who walked into a theater during The Dark Knight Rises and started shooting everyone. My dream is sort of based on that, so it's a bit disturbing.

I was at my local park with Niki and we were just hanging out. The sun had just set and it was getting darker out. There was a movie theater there at the park, Showtime Cinema. Of course it didn't occur to me that this theater is not located in the park obviously, but just a few minutes down the road. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, so I just went to check out the theater, perhaps to see what was playing(which I think was Dark Knight Rises, but I don't remember for sure). Instead of the whole movie theater being there, it was just one screening room. I sneaked in through one of the emergency exits, which wasn't locked for some reason. The theater was packed with people, and I looked around and saw a guy with a gun. Shots were fired, so I ran back out before the shooter could notice me and dialed 911. The lady on the other line seemed familiar, like I'd called 911 a few times already and had heard her voice before. She seemed very chill and relaxed. "911 what's your emergency?" she asked in a very monotonous tone. "There's a guy shooting people at Showtime Cinema! People have been killed, please send someone over." I said. "Someone will be right there," she replied, not a hint of worry or tension in her voice. I thought she would want more information, but she didn't say anything else so I just said "thank you" and she said "you're welcome. bye" like it was a normal everyday phone conversation. I waited outside awhile and it seemed to be taking the police forever to show up. Then, the theater doors burst open and people came running out. I thought it was finally over, until I saw the shooter come running out after them, shooting every person he could. There was blood and screaming; it was a terrible and frightening scene. He shot and killed one of my friends, Dani, and then came towards me. He took a shot at me and missed but I fell to the ground and pretended to be dead so that he wouldn't keep shooting. When I looked at him again I noticed that he was so angry and raging that he didn't notice he'd run out of bullets and was now just shooting blanks. So I stood up to him. I don't exactly what happened, but whatever I did worked and the cops came and everything was secured. The next thing I remember was reflecting on what had just happened. I vividly recalled all the blood, the screaming, the chaos, the dying, and it traumatized me. I cried and cried throughout the day and the next day. I kept having flashbacks and it was just awful. Then I realized that this was probably just a dream, so I talked to my mom and she showed me a newspaper article headlining the terrible event. There was some kind of picture that was blurry and I don't remember, and then somewhere in the writing they mentioned that I was a hero. I was too distraught to even think about being a hero though. 36, that number kept following me around. I could physically see that number, floating in the air around me. 36 people dead. So much death. I cried again, the pain was so real, the emotions so intense. Then I woke up for real and breathed a sigh of relief when I could finally know for sure that it was just a dream.

I know I haven't posted in awhile but I've been so lazy. I've been remembering dreams but I'm too lazy to type them up. Half of them have been about drowning, as usual, including the one from last night. I'm going to post that one as well as one I had a few nights ago that really creeped me out..

I had a dream that I was bleeding all over. I don't know why. I was just taking a shower and blood was turning the water red and I was bleeding out. In another dream the same night, I was trying to help a friend from my college with her math homework but she became frustrated and started cutting her wrist. She didn't stop there. She kept cutting all up her arm and was bleeding all over. It was quite scary/creepy. When I woke up I found a spot of blood on my pillow. I have NO idea where it came from. Weird.

I was in a pool with some of my friends in some sort of waterpark or hotel. The pool wasn't too big, maybe about one-third the size of a regular high school pool. But it was super crowded. There must have been atleast 60 people all crowded in there. There was barely any space between any of the people. I was treading water somewhere in the middle of the pool when I started to get pulled under. I tried to fight my way back to the surface but there was just so many people in my way, and I gulped in water and started drowning. I made it to the surface just barely and managed to wave my arms for help. Next thing I remember, a lifeguard had pulled me out and brought me back to life. Most everyone was out of the pool now, either leaving or watching me.