Aubrey

I had this dream a while back, like when Steve Irwin was still alive.
So me and my friend Brittany were going on a roadtrip to Wisconsin Dells. They have this waterpark there called the Kalahari, which is for like little kids but that's not the point. So we checked into the Kalahari, and when we opened the door to our room, it opened into the real live African Kalahari. So we ventured inside, and looked around. We started to walk to nowhere in particular. Along the way we saw lots of different animals like girrafes and snakes, except they were made from paper like origami animals. I went to touch them, but when i did they died. However, their angel spirit floating up to heaven was a real animal. So they were fake when they were living but real when they were dead? Anyways, I cried when they died. In the background Britt was turning into a tree.

All of a sudden we hear a rustling coming from a bush. (Britt is no longer a tree.) We look over at it, and suddenly this crazy guy wearing a comical wolf mask with a huge nose jumps out screaming, "RAAAHRBOOGABOOGABOOGA!!!" We look at him like, what the fuck is wrong with you? He whips off his mask. "AHA!" he says in an Australian accent. Apparently Steve Irwin has found his way into the dream. "I bet I fooled you lassies didn't I? Ha, no, you two youngsters are smart enough to know that the REAL African Wolfhound has a much LARGER snout!" he says as he makes a circular motion around the mask's nose. Britt and I look at eachother like, whats with this clown? Suddenly he's right in our faces, smiling as wide as possible. "Say, how would you two like to join me on a wild Native American horse hunt?" without our consent he throws us each on a spotted white and brown horse, then jumps on his own, and we ride of into the sunset with Steve laughing maniacally.

In this next clip, I am not included. However, I can see everything clearly through the lens of a video camera. I can tell I am watching a home video taken by a wife of her husband and son. They are on a yacht, sailing around in a little lake on a sunny day. The husband is sitting in a plastic lawn chair by the edge of the boat, but I can’t see his head. The camera is focused on his leg.
In his hand he holds a large knife. He stretches his leg out on the long chair, and makes a long, deep cut in his leg. Almost instantly his innards spill out of his leg like a bucket of chum being poured out, and it falls into the ocean, leaving a flappy skin-baggy leg behind. The man doesn’t stop there, he continues to mutilate himself. This time, he makes a wide gash across his stomach. Again, his guts and muscles and everything else pour out of him, leaving a skin bag stomach. The little son is crying and screaming in the background. “Daddy, please stop!” he shouts, but the father continues. “Whee, isn’t this fun?” says the mother.