Lucid-schizo-dreamer

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID


22:45 GMT - Sleep

Subway
I am going to the subway. Apparently I don’t want to pay and try to enter anyway, but I have no choice but to go to the ticket machine and buy one. Then I slide it through the validation machine and it is rejected several times. I am getting pissed off and when it finally opens up I run to the train. Then I realise I’m on the wrong side and jump to the tracks to get the train that is about to close the doors and leave on the other platform. I manage not to get killed and I get into the train.

A fairy tale
I am this poor shepherdess girl but beautiful like no other. All men, from all walks of life, want me and desire me. The latest one trying to conquer me is this rich sheik offering me a palace and riches. He says I’ll be the first and most important lady of his harem. Yeah, yeah, but I decline. They keep coming but I am in love with this other poor working guy. He is so brave and all but because I’ve been courted by so many princes and rich guys he just decided I’m too good for him and he chickens out. So one day I decide to launch a challenge – the one who takes all my sheep to sell somewhere far away in an exotic land and having to cross all sort of dangerous places and experiences, will be the one I’ll marry. I’m totally convinced he will manage and all the other rich guys in their palaces have no chance. But then I also wonder: did I do the right thing? I mean, the other guys are just city dwellers but they have the resources and this guy just has his passion and his guts... Oh well, let’s hope for the best.

0:30 GMT

Breakfast outside
The beginning is fuzzy. I was entering this lobby of a building that looked either a clinic or an office building. There’s a desk in front and some columns. I contour them and realise it is a circular corridor around this desk, along which there are doors leading somewhere. There’s also this sliding window-door leading to an interior terrace/garden. I have no clue what I am doing here. [gap]
Then the next scene seems to be in the outside terrace/garden. There are long tables with food on it. People are having breakfast there and I decide to join and eat something to. I find no place to seat but just grab some food. Strangely there are fried fish and other fried salty foods. I’m not used to that, I always eat fruits or muesli. I find a plate of “pataniscas” (a Portuguese dish that actually originated the Japanese vegetables “tempura”) and I grab one. I circulate around the tables looking for some more treats.

Laser show on a corn field and compassion for a heart broke
I’m now on the outside of this big building, looks like a huge barn or maybe it is the inn from previous dream. Now the long tables and long benches are in front of it and I’m sitting in one, turned to a corn field just in front. There’s a lot of chatting and laughter and I realise just close to me is my prep school sweetheart M. I am aware he just looks like when he was a kid and I know I am no longer a kid. Although I don’t become fully lucid, I know this is not real. He is just playing an old scene that happened with us. Because I’m not paying attention to him, he is also ignoring me but I see that he wants desperately to talk to me. So there is something that triggers general amusement and makes him look to my side and he uses the opportunity to smile at me and start conversation. I feel so much compassion for him. I feel “Gosh, poor guy, the suffering he went through those days just to get my attention.” I really loved him, I really did. But for some really complex reasons I said no when he later asked me to be his girl. This breaks my heart even more when I look at him there, so innocent. I feel no other emotions but compassion for him and some sadness that I can’t go back and tell him it was all so unnecessary, that he was loved, that he was free and that he didn’t need me.
At this point I shut him off from the dream and look to the corn field thinking how nice would be to see some UFOs in the sky, or making a crop circle or whatever. So then I see this lights moving around in the field and get excited. But then the lights forms the shape of doves and I realise it’s just some laser show projected on the corn wall. It’s cool but not what I had in mind.

Hill on fire, random stuff and the fairy’s house
Now it is daylight and warm. I’m also in the countryside, but I recognize it as some hills not far from my childhood home. I see red flames behind the hill in front of me. A fire! I want to see it closer and help whatever way I can to end it. I am with my mom and other people, but the others don’t care and keep moving on. My mom is the only one joining me.
I find firemen but the main fire is still far. Just a few patches of burning grass here and there and I grab some wet towel and starting extinguishing these little fires. As I go uphill I encounter a playground full of children and I wonder how it wasn’t yet evacuated. I keep going up and now I find a big white tent and inside is my aunt Lisa fighting a small fire to. I help her and keep moving up. Then I find a precinct where some festival is taking place and once again I wonder why aren’t people being evacuated. There are some reporters looking for someone to interview and I hardly manage to escape them. “MY god, there’s a huge fire raging just behind this! Does nobody know?” On some other tent there are a few fat guys eating and watching a movie about pig farms. They are discussing how useful it is to cut the pig’s nose. I see the images of that and I feel disgusted - like, what else are these guys going to come up with to inflict pain on the animals? I interrupt their lunch and tell them what I think. They are completely caught by surprise and think that I must be crazy.
I get out from the back of the tent and I find myself in a house. Tiny, with dirty corridor and I see this guy looking at me with very unfriendly. I have to find and exit fast. I find this interior yard and try to get out of there – I’ll have to climb the wall. So I start climbing and it’s not really a plain wall, it’s more like a very steep hill, with rocks, concrete blocks, all sort of pipes and wires... Then a couple joins me in the escape – it’s the guy’s wife and her “friend”.
When I arrive on the top, I am on top of a cliff looking over large planes. To my left though, there is an even higher ground. There are a few stairs that I climb and then I’m on this patio in front of a very cute house with vases of flowers. It’s lovely. I recognise it as the fairy’s house! I remember being there before and I feel very emotional.

2:20 GMT

Stalking Björk
I’m with my mom eating breakfast in an Inn and watching TV. There’s a story playing about this polish (?) guy who is in Portugal shooting a movie with Björk. They interview her and she looks so cute: By coincidence they are interviewing them at his home, which apparently is close to where I am with my mom. I am a huge fan so when we’re driving around during the day my mom keeps an eye of every house trying to spot the one of this guy. I think that’s stupid, but then she spots it behind some bushes. She turns right to that street. I see kids playing in the front yard a lady coming out of the garage and they do look polish or something like it. I really feel uncomfortable – what are we doing exactly?
So we go back to the Inn. After a few days we are cycling around with a friend in a funny bike for 3 people. I spot a group of strange people and I think I saw Björk disguised in the middle of them. Whoever that was, they had fun when they saw us biking. I thought I was going to sop with the stalking.
I pass a crossroad and stop on the side of the road for a while. Coincidently again, a car stops and a bunch of girls, two of them my old friends from school, Lic and Patty. They want directions to somewhere and I tell them we’re on vacation in the area but we also don’t know much about the surrounding places. We have a quick chat and I come back to the Inn.

4:50 GMT

Dutch people and stray animals
Maybe still on the same village as before, I’m walking around with mom and some friend of hers. We pass by a sports club, but it is dutch. There are these board on the wall with names and dates and my mom asks me what it is and I explain it looks like football matches. I get bored and ask to leave. So we keep walking and find an entrance to a residential with restaurant, followed by an entrance to a farm. All seems to be of the same dutch people.
Then I see my father. What is he doing here? Apparently some work related to the dogs and cats in the area. He tells me of how many pets are abandoned by people in this area but also that there’s a shift in people’s mind because there’s also an increase in people who report the cases of their neighbours who do it.
Later we’re on the road, I guess to go home.

Crystal out of my nose
Then a dream fragment. I was cleaning my nose and a huge crystal comes out of it – nice. Then I make some health recommendations to someone.

6:00 GMT

Family reunion
I am at home and my uncle F. and his wife are there too. I am ironing clothes and I hear them talking about absolutely ignorant things and I say to them something like the market and capitalism being a total illusion and that for them to be happy they had to completely let go of that illusion and just be free. I say it is something basic and obvious and not a matter for discussion, but they don’t buy it. Oh well. I later go to the toilet to find out that one of the walls is now half destroyed. I am told someone fell agains the wall and I think “wow, should be a really heavy person”. I touch it and it ends falling apart completely. So, no toilet.

Space research institute
Then I’m visiting this centre, it looks like a research institute or a university. I’m on this big room with guys sitting at desks and prototypes everywhere. There’s a really interesting movie playing on a computer screen and I sit down watching it. It is a mix of Blade Runner and Star Wars, but supposedly refers to real life. They are talking about this Death Star that is in orbit on our planet – really? Apparently it is pointed to or being commanded by the White House - this part was not clear.
Then I realise I’m sitting at this guy’s desk and he comes in and looks at me like “What are you doing here?” But I don’t say a word, I just sit in another chair and try not to get in his way. Then a group of students come and grab chairs and also come to watch this film. They all look at me like I don’t belong there and I know I don’t, but I’m having fun, so just let me be! Then a door opens behind us – there’s a toilet there – and a totally naked guy comes out of it. People find it bizarre, but not enough to stop him or cover him. He is complaining that he can’t shit, that he has a serious case of constipation and I find all this hilarious. I follow him and then I understand what’s going on. He was trying to save his marriage but he caught his wife cheating on him with this colleague from the institute and just freaked out. Now he is a bit nuts. Eventually he even crosses with his wife on the hallway and she is chatting with her lover when she sees her naked husband. I feel pity for this guy. Probably a brilliant mind that flipped.

7:45 GMT – Wake up

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Not a good night. Too hot and my sleep was awful. Hard to remember dreams.

1:06 GMT

Visiting my old neighborhood
A very sketchy dream. I was going on my way to my mom’s house (where I used to live). I remember I had a white dress and a white bag crossing over one shoulder. The bag was full but still I was trying to jam something else inside it, leaving it completely full, close to exploding.
I had to pass by the house of this guy for whom I had a crush many years ago and for some reason I didn’t want him to see me. When I arrived at the top of the slope where the house lies, instead of turning left as I should, I turned right in the direction of this place where I had my extra curricular activities after school. The place was now turned into a library or bookshop. I entered and a shelf of books caught my eye. Now I try hard to remember what they were about, but I only have this vague feeling it was something like esoteric and self-help themed. There was something interesting about this dream but I can’t remember what.

Exhibition of a woman’s head
I was visiting an exhibition. It was about this woman who offered her body to science to be studied and exhibited. This exhibition was all about her head. There were slices of her brain, all of the details of her head in different pieces. Her picture and even a life-sized model of her head. Also it was about her ideas. It was weird but I’ve been to even stranger exhibitions, so why not.

Undefined
Then I got blank. I tried to recall the dreams I had, but all I could write down was: 3 men prisoners on one room and some seduction scene.

3:45 GMT

Animal suffering
I am walking unknown streets on a suburban block of buildings. There are some backyards, with lots of garbage and abandoned lots. On some backyards I find lots of dogs chained, stressed and unhappy. I can hardly cuddle them, because a few are quite angry and threaten to bit me if I get to close. I see close to 20 dogs in this situation on several backyards and it gets to the absurd of people having pandas and some other cute fluffy animals I can’t recall, on chains on their backyards. I just think “That’s it, I have had it!” I am semi-lucid and not afraid to scream my lungs out. So I scream to whoever wants to listen that animals deserve better, that people will pay for being so stupid and ignorant and causing so much suffering to the animals. Then I make a wish that they all open their eyes to the truth and become compassionate and I walk the streets repeating a mantra out loud, to bring some blessings to these people.

Artist’s community
I’m on a building which is both cohousing and gallery for lots of art students. The house is amazing, with all of the walls and corridors full of paintings, sculptures and other art forms. So colourful. And the people living here are very entertaining.
I am sitting in a sofa in a living room on what must be the 3rd floor. There’s more people on the sofa and I am waiting for something, maybe that they take me somewhere else. Then a girl, who looks like a boy, starts flirting me. I realise she looks so much like this girl friend from my childhood, who liked me but bullied me and died with an overdose on her teens. It freaked me out so I decide to leave the place. But not soon enough I realise she is chasing me. I leave the building and enter a cafeteria just in front. She is still on me and sits on my table. I felt very uncomfortable but I decided not to make a big deal out of it and just had my coffee or so until the dream dissolved.

6:50 GMT

Surreal tunnel building
Some longer dream, but I only remember being digging a hole in the sand when I find a tunnel under the ground, where there is a canal with water flowing. For some exotic reason I enter the tunnel and feel the need to reinforce the walls of these canal, that are breaking up in some places. A turtle passes by me on the water. I build this wall and decorate it with all sorts of stuff that is lying around (garbage) – some gnome dolls, some treasure chest, some Christmas or whatever decoration, etc... It gets so kitsch. I then find a necklace with an image of the Buddha. I feel tempted to keep it for myself (I’m a Buddhist) but either because I had this underlying feeling that I’m actually dreaming or because I thought it was real and would be theft to take something that was not mine, I simply hanged it on a higher wall on a safe and clean place, as a way of showing my respect.

Wet and crying on a porch
Another one I can’t remember, but I was on a porch and it was raining a lot. I was crying and my tears were mixing up with the rain drops on my face. My clothes were getting wet. I just remember some reference to tigers, but no idea what the context was.