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    Dream Warrior and Explorer of the Dreamplane

    1. 4 Oct: Sangha intrigues, Keanu Reeves new show and legal battle in the family

      by , 10-04-2022 at 08:34 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      Attending some teachings, some place up in the mountains with an amphitheatre. Some old students and western lamas are conspiring to betray my teacher. They are exposed and they are sent away. Joakim was not among them, but he concerns me a lot. I know that he is no longer a buddhist, has some new non recommended friends for company, so I suspect he is around only to cause harm. I stay close and keep an eye on him.

      New series on TV with Keanu Reeves. He plays a lawyer with a split personality. He sometimes dresses up to match the personalities, but it is highly disturbing. One of them is a dog and he wears a dog costume and walks on four legs and looks weirdly like a real dog from the uncanny valley. Some other of his personalities are of black guys and he paints himself in black face. The makeup is so perfect that all we see is really a black guy, but we know who's underneath and I am shocked that he is actually doing this on a show in 2022. Then an episode in which he is the dog becomes a real life experience for me and I meet dog Keanu on the street. Although I know there is a person in there, I pretend I don't know and I pet him and talk to him as if he is a lost pet. He never says a word and then he runs across the street away from me and enters a bulding. I go after him. I walk through a long twisted corridor and I see many families gathered in rooms, mourning their loved ones, or just visiting them and realize it is some kind of hospice. Dog Keanu disappears at the end of the corridor and I get lost inside the last room, only to find my mother and my aunt Ludovina laying down in beds. At first I think they are restrained because my mom has an eye mask and for a while it seemed like she had a mouth gag. Turns out she is just taking a nap and she wakes up and moves freely. She explains that my uncle Francisco managed to get some legal document saying they both are insane and needed to be committed so the hospital complied. But she says that the situation is being solved right now and she is just resting before she leaves this place. Then my dad and aunt Lisa arrive and they say they just challenged the decision and are awaiting their release. Then both my uncles come by to confront them and for some reason I have a really big heavy pan on my hands and I threathen to smash it against their f-ing heads if they come any closer. They actually get really scared and go to a corner at the back of the room. Their kids also come, namely João, Sara and André and they are shocked with my behaviour but I also feel that they understand it. I hear my uncles talking in the background with other people, arguing they need the family money because sometimes their kids go hungry. I feel sad for my cousins, but it's their parents fault and not my mother's. I wanna reach out to them, but every one is staying quiet in their places so I decided to do the same as we wait for the legal fight to unravel.
    2. 19 Mar: Buddhist Lama and attempting TOTM

      by , 03-19-2021 at 10:41 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      In the countryside, there is a lake and I am staying there with some friends. One of them is apparently developing feelings for me and because I am not interested, I decide to keep my distance from him. Literally, when he is on one side of the lake, I am at the opposite, and every time he tries to reach me, I move away. Our other friend comes to tell me he thinks our friend is depressed and he believes it is because of the recent racism escalation so he wants to throw him some lunch party or something and I find it a bad idea because his problem with him is uncorresponded love, but I tell him to go ahead, just don't count on me.

      Then I am in the mountains. At a wooden cabin. I hear gunshots, probably hunters, which I detest. I go check on my dogs who are outside within a fence, but hunters sometimes don't care, they shoot anything that moves, so I fear for their safety. I see a couple Buddhist nuns passing by, and ask them if they've seen hunters around. They say they heard the shots and are saying prayers towards the animals at risk. Then some larger group passes right in front of my gate. The main figure is a Buddhist Lama and he comes surrounded by many monks, one of them by his side carrying a golden metal piece I can't identify. When passing in front of my lawn, the Lama grabs the piece quickly and drops it heavily at our entrance and apparently that means something important. They all come onto the lawn and sit around the Lama who is facing the golden object doing prayers. Then he makes some unintelligible prediction about a baby. Riverstone, whom I haven't noticed before was there, claims to hear something like a baby crying behind a wooden wall on our backs. It's supposed to be a hollow space for storage under a staircase or something, which has a door on the back that I know is locked with several locks. He is kinda out of his mind so he rips a board from the wall, not even letting me say there is a door. Inside this space is an altar covered in brocades and inside some covers is a baby girl that he picks up in awe and shock and brings to the Lama. Everybody is thinking of miracles but I know there is a door at the back of this pillar and ask Fernando S., who is also there, to check if the door is unlocked. He quietly confirms that it is unlocked. I get a bit pissed about the whole show, I don't understand the need for faking this whole shenanigan and I go outside the fence to the beginning of the hill descent. It's dark but I can see there are many other cabins and lots of activity going on, fires and prayers. It totally looks one of those Tibetan Buddhist settlements in the mountains, around monasteries and I think of my guru.


      Literally I am telling the previous dream to Riverstone. I get to the part of the monks sitting at the garden. And he is so excited to hear it, just as he was in the original dream to live it. He is grasping for a meaning and I can tell he will be disappointed in the end. Anyway, I didn't reach the end of the story.


      I am sleeping at some kind of attic at some family gathering. My dad, my deceased uncle Fermando and his wife are in that same house but they wanna leave, so my dad comes to wake me up to join him in offer them a gift before they go. I was pretending to be sleeping, cause I didn't want to be involved, but I notice them coming to check on me, so before they see me, I sneak out of bed and hide between an opened closet and remember I had more interesting things to do.
      I get lucid and teleport myself to outside. Remember to do the TOTM but cant do the ceiling fan thing because I am outside now, so I go for the surf thing. I visualize the ocean just over the end of a hill nearby and I start hearing the water. I go there and half way walking on grass, the ground beneath me disappears and I fall from the sky into the ocean. Amidst the waves, I try to visualize a surf board but it does not work. I kinda feel it but I do not see it, so I catch a wave in an invisible board. Then i see some kids surfing. One of them fall from his board and I "borrow" it. They are pissed about it, but I tell them it's just to catch one wave and I'll give it back. But the waves are really flat. I catch two, but have difficulty in taking any pleasure in the experience. Feels more like sliding over flat water, than actually surfing, as the waves are so small. The last wave pushes me into what seems a small cave but then it is a room.
      The dream shifts and now I am with kids in a room and they are waiting for the educator to come back. They say she'll put me in detention for making a mess. Indeed I am all wet and spread mud and water all over the pillows I am supposed to be sitting on. But when she comes in and before she manages to say anything, I sneak out and think I wanna surf more, but I am in the countryside again. I visualize an ocean bay and I head there. I am on top of a cliff where people watch beach goers down below. I then see Fernanda in a modelling gig shooting pics at the other side of this cliff, where there is some kind of canyon or canal and other people leaning over a rail, watching it. I ignore, because my goal is to surf again, so I turn again to the bay but it is gone and now in its place is a walk-in water fountain in a park with kids playing. Damn.
      I walk a few more steps towards the end of this park and someone calls my name excited. It's a friend of a friend (who actually does not exist in RL). I come back to say hi and she is very unpleasant, asking what I am doing here as I should be with my family or something. Then she has another friend with her, whom I never met, and she insults me too, saying maybe I am fooling around with some guy as I did with that guy in Italy while my boyfriend was at home. I did not do anything like that in RL, but in the dream I felt like I did, so I ask why this bitch knows about this and how many more friends of friends know. But then I say it doesn't matter because I don't know them anyway and I couldn't care less. I turn around to leave and they also leave still laughing and insulting me. I just go back two steps to tell the lady that I actually thought she was a nice person except for the part where she is a fucking cunt. They went down some stairs and when I look around I am inside some house again, seems like a clinic. There are rooms with patients and rooms with professionals apparently receiving training. I feel I am intruding but the patients gathering at some leisure room are very welcoming. Then I realize they all have back problems and are there for some physical therapy. I see something in the walls that catches my attention: intricate living landscapes. Each frame has divisions with small landscapes like lakes, ponds, ocean. You can see tiny rocks in it, mosses, algae, all real but in tiny size and most incredibly they are all covered in water that stays vertically in the divisions without anything holding it. Also, we are encouraged to touch it and make waves, make the water muddy, etc. Then I recall again my objective and I am considering choosing an ocean landscape to jump into it, but I wake up.

      Updated 03-19-2021 at 10:47 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , task of the month
    3. 3 Oct: Discover a buddhist altar underground and a sword leads me to a temple

      by , 10-03-2020 at 08:31 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening astral projection

      With some people, bored. I spot a stone slab on the ground that I lift and I excavate under. They wonder what I am doing and even I don't know. I find an empty space and with a lantern I point down a shaft and show them my find. There is a Buddhist altar a couple levels below. I somehow get down there and from the middle of the altar objects I get a sword that I feel compelled to take with me. I can't go back up the hole, so instead I follow a tunnel that goes from there and I end up by a river. I notice I am in my white satin pyjama and barefoot with a sword now in the middle of the street and I start attracting other people's attention. There is a dock on the opposite side of the river and some guy starts walking parallel to me. He is making me nervous when I realize he wants to attack me as soon as he gets a chance to cross the river. But I save him the trouble by flying up and towards him. I brandish my sword and knock him down with a chi energy blast, don't even touch him. I keep walking up a road and 3 Chinese boys, also with swords, start walking by my side in an intimidatory way. I warn them they'll get hurt if they attack me, but eventually I just fly away also leaving them behind. I fly over a canyon and next I see a vast savannah. I spot some hunters ambushing some wild animals and preparing to shoot arrows at them and I destroy their arrows mid-air with my sword. Then see a large number of people walking towards some big temple in the horizon. There is a stupa and a couple pyramids plus other ancient and new structures in a rocky plateau surrounded by lush jungle. It is so beautiful that I cry. I am welcomed at a reception where they say they didn't expect me but can accommodate me. They show me the restrooms and leisure rooms and communal kitchens. I am hungry and offer to cook some mushrooms and vegetables I see on the counter, but no one else seems much interested in it. I recognize some faces but most are unfamiliar to me. They then take me along to meet a great old lama I never heard of. He is receiving people or teaching at a very large auditorium with a very high ceiling. I want to get an overview of the event, so I fly up to a chandelier hanging from the ceiling. The lama sees me and scolds me for it, because I am disrespecting him by standing above him. I project my chi again, this time not to hurt but almost as a telepathic mean of communication. I am both trying to show him I am a friend and mean no disrespect, but also kind of showing of my powers. When he receives my energy blast, his bindus start emanating a blueish light in all directions, which causes quite a stir among the audience. I feel I better leave and stop freaking out everybody. I wait outside at the lobby and I find Laura there. She says there is a rumour that Rinpoche is arriving there too and as I walk around and between some white columns at an entrance hall, just thinking about what to say when I see him, he arrives and comes down in my direction. I notice that he sees me and he is containing his emotion. So am I. But there is never an opportunity to talk, because he is immediately engulfed by eager followers and disappears in a crowd.

      Updated 10-12-2020 at 08:59 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment
    4. 23 Apr: Bullies, babysitting and a sexual fantasy with Eva Green (graphic)

      by , 04-23-2019 at 09:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I watch a friend bringing his gay boyfriend home for a dinner with the family. Family is unaware they date, and maybe even that he is gay. So it comes as a great shock when they casually mention it. Also, the guy had a recent drug problem and his parents are highly controlling it and all hell breaks lose when he shares that his boyfriend is a meth addict in recovery. They leave the dinner and go to the train station, it is raining and they kiss and make out. A train arrives and some guys that usually bully them get out from it. The couple decides to walk away and avoid them.
      Then I am caught in the action, as I stand in their way to allow the guys to escape. The bullies get pissed at me. I escape, but later I am in school and they bully me at the sports field. I don't feel fear, but I want to expose them, so I find a way to record them bullying me. They mock me, force me to do push ups and other silly things as they say intimidating things and somehow I end up naked from waist up. But I feel pleased because I got footage of it and pictures of the 4 guys. I run to the house of a friend. At her window is Conan Osiris (the musician) who is apparently her friend and looks surprised to see this girl running in topless. They borrow me a blanket that I use to cover myself and then everybody feels more comfortable to hear what I have to say. Then we make a plan to show these images the next day to some teacher or the director.
      But the next day there is something going in the school behind closed doors at the auditorium, some presentation or so. Outside in the lobby there are many strange machines like ATMs and we are told by a lady at a desk to take a machine with us and join the presentation.

      Late night with my mom at a retail shop to buy a blanket for some baby. The shop closes and we are the only ones left. I am actually excited we might spend the night in there, but a worker spots us and tells us to go towards the exit. We argue we haven't yet found the blanket and because it is for a baby, she feels moved and helps us finding it. Then we take it home to the baby, which we are just taking care of and I have no idea who the mother is. I fall in love with the little one, but I get disappointed that he rejects all the food I give him. My mom feeds him chocolate desserts and it's the only thing he'll eat. I argue against it, but she says it's too late to break the habit. I say if it was my kid I'd cut all sugars.

      Watching and then taking part of a Tarantino movie, so excited with how awesome it is. I am walking into a heavily guarded compound to talk to some bigshot, who happens to be played by Eva Green. I have to exit the building to an interior garden and have to meet her at the garden house, which is also heavily surrounded by guards. I am led by an attendant. First the girl goes in with a dress to hand over to Eva. I hear that she doesn't like as much as she likes the attendant's own dress, but accepts it anyway. Then I am allowed to go in and my first thought is how incredibly hot she is and I hope she changes the dress in front of me. She doesn't but anyway we don't talk much.
      I simply go towards her and grope her. I grab one of her breasts and suck it through her thin clothes. (I'm not a lesbian, but I just find her the hottest and most beautiful woman and I would definitely do her ). Then something bizarre happens and I become her! Now I am horny for myself. I start to undress in front of a mirror and I suck my own breasts (a dream ability I have!). I touch myself while admiring my goddess-like beauty. I am not Eva Green anymore, I transformed into a Buddhist deity, even more beautiful and irresistible. I can't hold up the hornyness anymore and I find a rubber toy on the table and I use it for my pleasure.
      Some guard comes in and sees me, but I am not disturbed by it, nor do I feel like having him join. He feels awkward and slowly walks out in silence. I continue pleasing myself in front of the mirror and I climax gently and continuously and feel an amazing sensation of well-being rushing through my veins (not just in the dream, I actually had an orgasm in RL).
    5. 26 Jan: Running from home, spiritual encounter and expelling a demon

      by , 01-26-2019 at 11:12 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      Living with my family, but feeling despaired and wanting to run away. I am preparing a bag with clothes and a few more items to run away while they are all out. Then my family returns, I hide the bag, no one suspects of my plans. But I see my mom and I start reconsidering my plans because of her. I don't want her to suffer for not knowing about my whereabouts. She is the only one I don't want to hurt.

      All alone in Brussels, very early morning. People are still going around, hoping from bar to bar. I feel pretty alive and aware and I absorb all the details of the decorations, architecture, the terraces, etc. I notice that the street is warm but in between terraces it is extremely cold. That's because they use gas heating on each terrace. Then I am dragged with a crowd into a very underground place. Its entrance is literally a tunnel with no light, just some very fade lamps at the end of it, where there is a door. The people and the light and the shadows make really interesting images and I grab my phone to take photos.

      Enjoying my last day abroad. Go to a fair, incredibly crowded. Then at some lateral street I see a couple of Buddhist monks and decide to follow them.
      I find a long line of monks waiting to go inside some building and I go with them. Once inside they prostrate until we reach a room with an altar and some pictures and images of Buddhas and teachers. I pay my respects to. Then follows another room and another altar and more prostrations. As I also prostrate, an old lady in a thin robe appears and leans over to whisper in the ear of the woman in front of me, something about her health and some advice on how to deal with it. The woman seems caught by surprise but thankful for the advice. Then the lady turns to me, her robe opens up, she is naked and doesn't care. She tells me I have to summon and surround myself with nagas to expel the bad naga that is disturbing me. I say "what?" but she goes away without further clarification. I get up and follow her through the crowded streets until she enters her house. She doesn't pay attention to me, never says a word, but also doesn't ask me to leave. She feeds her cat and does whatever she has to do. I tell her I need to know more about her warning, and tell her that my mom had dreamed something related to it the previous night [she did, in waking life]. She doesn't reply but she points me to a bedroom where I can spend the night. I stay there. I lay on the bed and I fall asleep. Then wake up but feel drowsy. I try to move, but feel like my body weighs a ton. Then try to call for help and my voice sounds terribly deep, scary and distorted, like I have a demon controlling my body. I fight back for some time. Then eventually it goes away and I recover control. I don't see the lady anymore.

      Then leave to airport. I am back to Lisbon. There are some new constructions by the river bank and I fly over to see the changes. I find a burger stall with a nice terrace, selling really pricey food. A veggie burger is 15€ and a whole meal with fancy wine and dessert is 250€. But then I look around and find a really cool vegan fast food place that has affordable delicacies and I call Riverstone to come have lunch with me there. I meet Evangelion there by chance.

      Updated 01-26-2019 at 11:14 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid , false awakening , dream fragment
    6. 20 Dec: Alien disguise, gangs, family and letter from my guru

      by , 12-20-2018 at 07:17 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I am pretending to be an alien, for some reason. I am wearing prosthetics in my body, which I feel that won't fool anyone, but as long I keep serious about it, people are believing me.

      Living at my mom's with other people. It is a dystopian world, no rule of law, people self-organize, but we have managed to cope. Until someone passing by shows us we should be leaving now and join a bigger community as the gangs who pillage are coming our way and will burn everything. I agree and start choosing what's essential to take, but end up caught up by attachment to all secondary stuff, because I can't stand imagining it all going up in flames. But there is no way I can take 90% of the stuff with me.

      At my paternal grandma's house with my mom. We wake up early morning hearing voices, it's some cousins who arrived and joined us. But although their faces are familiar, I have no idea who they are. At breakfast the group has grown with some 4 more family members, uncles and aunts I have no idea who they are. They all behave very at ease around the breakfast table, leaving a lot of dirty dishes and eating my food without any care, but they supposedly are family and I try to keep it cool.

      At some hotel or hostel during some Buddhist teachings I am attending. A couple of Asian guys knocks on my door. One is a big guy and looks Chinese. He hands me an envelope, but it is already open. It contains some money and a letter from my teacher, but clearly all pages are out of order and I wonder if the money is all there. I get rally mad that the guys opened the letter. I start reading it and despite the calligraphy I can actually understand but with the effort to concentrate on what it says, I wake up.
    7. 29 Apr: Fire immolation

      by , 04-29-2013 at 04:18 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I am walking a path up a hill, alongside others. Around us, on the hill, are scattered buildings. I am a visitor and they are students there.
      I become semi-lucid when I look at the sky and realize how unreal it looks. The colour is super sharp, the clouds are moving too fast and there's something just mesmerizing about all that. The realization of the dream nature of things plunges me into a state of profound melancholy, bliss and hypnosis. The girl walking by my side says "Oh my god, you look like you are in love!". What??? No, she got it wrong. What I am is hopeless of ever being in love. What I am is ready to let go, because there's nothing holding me back. No hope, no illusions. And I remember Morpheus' quote "You have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because he is expecting to wake up." That's what I am. She doesn't understand.
      Anyway, further ahead I see a tree and from the tree top falls a guy who is burning in flames. When he is contorting on the floor, I notice he is a buddhist monk on red and yellow robes. I scream to my friends to go and help him, while I run to one of the buildings to call 911. I find a reception where I make the call, but then I feel I should have helped to stop the fire instead, so I run to the tree again. My friends are there looking puzzled and there's no sign of a burning man anywhere. Instead, there's a couple of westerners, a guy and a girl, sitting under the tree, although they are also wearing the buddhist monastic robes. My friends say I allucinated and go away. The monk boy befriends me. He wants to know what I saw. Then I ask if I could possibly be seing him in the future, but he assures me he would not ever self-immolate. Although he feels just like me, ready to let go, he would not waste this life. He chose to be a very, very sad monk. We feel complete empathy for each other. We hold hands very strongly. I feel his warmth becoming mine. For some reason his hands are incredibly dirty and greasy, but I don't feel disgusted. We just can't let go of each other anymore.

      Updated 04-29-2013 at 04:31 PM by 34880

      Categories
      Uncategorized
    8. 16 Dec: Egyptian stone and lucid romance

      by , 12-20-2010 at 11:27 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG SHARED

      22:40 GMT

      Family dinner
      At my paternal grandma’s home. I was asleep but my mom arrives and I wake up with her voice. She is arguing with the rest of the family. I look through the window and I vaguely see them sitting outside around a long table. I know she's very tired, as we spoke on the mobile before and she is with very little patience. She is complaining because she had left some sweater hanging to dry and they took it away to put the table in the patio. I go across the kitchen, to get to outside, but the light is off and when I turn it on it takes a few seconds to get bright (but it turns on!!)
      My mom is just coming inside and we hug and I listen to her complaints. Then we go outside. It’s dawn. She points out to what they did: they used the sheets that were also hanging to dry, to make some kind of tent under which they prepared the table. They all think she is making a big deal out of it, but I understand her rage: they’ll do whatever they want, regardless of how that affects her hard work.
      She now reminds them how we have to be leaving the next day before 12h and how they put that at risk. I don't know exactly why, but it occurs to me that for me leaving at 12h would be too late for me and I get worried.
      I then look at my dad and an uncle who are observing and discussing how some liquid they poured on the garden last time killed the grass there. It's completely burned down.


      2:45 GMT

      At home
      At my mom’s on the balcony. I see aquaria with little turtles. I have that recurring feeling they must be starving, because I don’t feed them for weeks, maybe months. Then for a few seconds I have this other feeling I must stop this obsession (don’t get lucid, though, but have a slight impression this is just happening in my mind). I know I have no turtles anymore. Still, I decide to go to the kitchen looking for some food to give to them.
      On the kitchen I meet Riverstone and Nighthawk plus some girl friend of mine. Riverstone is standing, doing something. I sit at the head of the table. The girl is on my left and Nighthawk is on my right. They are discussing software. Then Nighthawk starts talking to me and we get very close, with legs touching under the table. He then has to leave and he puts his hand on my shoulder when he gets up. When he is gone I go to my mom’s room and there’s an anime playing on the dvd, that I forgot there since last time I visited. There are some very strong oral sex scenes with the female main character. I feel embarrassed that my mom might see it, so I try to shut it off in a hurry when I sense her on the corridor. Then I notice the bedside table has a lot of my college dossiers like if I had been studying them recently.


      5:30 GMT

      Egyptian mystery stone
      On a museum of Egyptian art. An important piece of stone with carvings is being studied, repaired and then prepared for exhibition to public. I am the leader of the team who discovered it and is working on it. An heavy wooden structure is being used to erect the stone, but it falls heavily on the floor, almost crushing me under it.
      Later there’s a press conference and three people are supposed to speak, me included, but when the museum director tells me she is counting on me I freak out. I can’t recall anything to say. I don’t have a clue about Egyptian art and culture.
      I know I'm not an expert on this. But how to explain it? I almost get lucid, but not quite.
      I tell her I’m amnesic, but she doesn’t buy it. She sends me to the library with some books and says “Read some shit about Egypt and I’m sure you’ll recover your memory and come up with something to say.” So I sit and I actually get a plan. I grabbed some cd-rom for children about ancient Egypt and I plan to say just some basics, inspired on it and give it a twist, like I’m just keeping the mystery by not going into details about the stone.
      But I’m not sure this will work out, so deep down I wish I’m saved by the bell somehow. And I do. Some guys in a tank break in through the wall of the conference room, with heavy weaponry, asking for the stone. They cause mayhem and I'm thankful for that. I escape to the outside through the hole on the wall they made.


      Rendez-vous with Nighthawk
      I am walking on some huge temple – basically a very high ceiling over an empty hallway, supported by really tall columns. There’s a small earthquake, just big enough to cause some stones to fall. I’m running away, avoiding being hit by them. I reach outside and I am in some road intersection of what looks like downtown Lisbon. I recognise this place from a previous dream and that has the power to make me lucid. I then feel so much peace. The sun is shining and golden rays bathe my skin. The stone pavement, the buildings, the people walking, the traffic lights, everything is incredibly detailed and I am absorbing each and every detail as nectar. It’s almost an erotic experience. Then I touch something and lucidity gets even more stable. Still I feel it’s not as stable as to allow me to meditate, so what’s next thing on my mind? Maybe due to my mood, I think about Nighthawk. I jump through a sewer hole on the ground to use it as a portal to his dreams (not a clever idea) and the darkness through which I fall doesn’t seem to end.
      I think maybe I’m waking up for good, but then in the dark I hear Nighthawk’s voice “Is it you [name]?”, “Yes, where are you?”. Slowly the light shines again and I’m back at the same street I was before. But now it is raining and I turn around and I see Nighthawk running across the street to meet me. We kiss passionately, soaking wet and soon we’re leaning against a car on some back alley and we make love right there. The dream flickers and he is now moving away. I see him crossing the same road again, but now going away from me. I’m not yet ready to let him go, so I go after him. I lose him in the crowd, but I turn around a corner and I see him again. I run to grab him and I kiss him again in very slow motion until I wake up.

      7:20 GMT

      Grandpa and aunt enmity
      At an apartment where supposedly my grandfather lives alone. But not entirely alone, because an aunt that we dislike, claimed ownership of part of his house and the court decided she had the right to a room, so she lives there, but cursing my grandfather all the time. I am there one day when she is gathered around a table in her room, with some friends. They are preparing some snacks and completely vilifying my grandpa. I only join them to try to share a different angle to the story. I help prepare the snacks, but when the butter is gone, I cover the bread with plastic film as if it iss some sort of spread.

      Sangha
      I’m at some place with a large group of people sitting, I think Buddhists receiving teachings and it’s interval and some people are gossiping. We see passing before us a girl that is supposedly a nun, but instead of her bald head and usual nun robes, she is now in a fantastic red strap dress with tulle skirt and a black long ponytail. They are making vile comments about her, but I remind them than judging others is much worse than her breaking of her vows.
      I then go outside for fresh air and I find two conches on the ground. I pick them up remembering how I had one as big as these, with which I could hear the ocean. I try the same with these. The first has the same ocean sound I was used to hear, but the second one is a bit more bizarre. At first also looks like the ocean, but then I realise it’s monks voices singing sacred Buddhist mantras. I take it off my ear to check if the sound doesn’t come from inside the building (some cd playing, for instance), but I confirm it really comes from the conch. That’s special, I’ll take it!


      Kids parade
      Then to my left some kids from my old school parade in costumes. It reminds me of our Carnival parades. But they look so much more awesome. Their costumes are in black vinyl and steampunk inspired while we had crappy capes made from black plastic bags to pretend we're bats.

      8:30 GMT

      Updated 12-20-2010 at 11:32 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
    9. 8 Dec: Chase, goths and sucessful meditation

      by , 12-08-2010 at 09:47 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG SHARED

      2:40 GMT

      Selling grandma’s house
      I’m at my grandma’s house with my mom. It is completely empty and I’m telling my mom how I never before noticed the place is actually nice, when it’s empty – no longer crammed with furniture, it let’s light in and has lots of space. We’re doing a last tour to all rooms just to check if everything is ok. A lady is coming to see the house and then I realise it is for sale. I find a paper on the wall, near the fax machine (didn’t know there was one...) and I take it, just when my mom is opening the door to the lady.

      Walking through memories
      Walking by the neighbourhood of my childhood’s best friend. It looks under construction as it was then in the past and not as it looks nowadays. An old colleague from school is walking with me and we’re both going through our memories. From the end of this neighbourhood we pass into the backs of our old school. I recall it was the place for kids to make out and we do find a couple there half hidden by the grass and we smile. He also recalls some guys who did drugs also met on this place but that I never saw. As we keep going we pass by some gardened area where we used to run through on our physical education classes. But there’s a lot of new trees making the path a bit more dark than it used to be. I see some figures going down that path and I feel curious and go after them. My colleague is left behind.

      Golden Buddhas
      At the end of this path I find a building, the door is half open and there are people standing there, people arriving and trying to go inside and I peak and see lots of people sitting there. I see monks and realise it’s a Buddhist group listening to some teachings from their guru. I don’t recognize him and it all seems a bit fishy to me, but I try not to judge before knowing them, so I also try to find a seat. But just when I’m about to sit, it ends and the teacher gets up and heads to the exit. People are bowing down at his passage and I sneak outside where there is a table with some Buddhist relics and sacred objects for people to admire. I just get in there when they are scolding a lady who tried to steal some object by hiding it on her coat. Then I go back to the garden and no longer it looks dark but instead it is very bright and I see many many big golden Buddhas statues. Some are floating in the air above our heads and I pass under one and touch the lotus flower on which a Buddha is sitting. I get an amazing feeling I can’t really describe, like I’m floating on air or dissolving into the air.

      Japanese artist
      Then I see some Japanese banners waving with the wind and go check it out. I meet a girl who paints canvas and banners with traditional Japanese paintings. She is selling her work on some corner enclosed by hedges. Her cheaper painting costs 20 EUR. I tell her I love her work but I have no money with me. Then we start talking and I notice she is Japanese-looking although she tells she never actually been to Japan. I tell her I did and she says “How lucky of you!” I ask why she never been there and she says it’s the land of her ancestors and she plans to go one day, but she is always travelling everywhere but there. She tells me she even travelled on a Japanese boat with a Japanese crew once for some reason, but never put a foot in Japan. Then she tells me (and I see it through her eyes) about her adventures on that boat. The crew was all men and one day she entered some room where they were doing some heavy work and could not leave and she caught one or two peeing to bottles, because they could not even go to the toilet. She was so embarrassed and the men were laughing at her and tell her to come in. After a few days she was already so adapted and relaxed she even took some provocative pictures like one in which she was doing fellatio to some phallic shaped pipe.

      6:00 GMT

      A chase and goths
      Inside some house, on what seems to be the office room. I m looking through the window and I see a couple. I recognize Sandra but don’t know the guy. For some reason they are coming inside the house looking for me and I want to hide, so I run to the toilet and lock myself there. They are trying to break in, so I escape through a window and go to the rooftop and from there I jump to the middle of a street. The street is filled with boxes and bags with groceries and I decide to hide behind it and pick up some food – some bread, juice and so on – to take with me, because apparently I’m planning to go on a long trip. But they come at the window and they see me. I run and I hide on some large building, like an abandoned slaughterhouse. They keep chasing me and I have to climb through some ropes and a few more stunts to get to a second floor. Here I find some offices and hide in one, trying to lock the door behind me. But some group of Goths come inside to do something. One guy in the group wants to help me so he makes me lay down on some kind of hospital bed that they take outside. I’m covered by a sheet, but I am totally sure this won’t work so I jump out of it and decide to just run. The gothic guy help me escape through a window. Outside there are stands – some kind of fair – with gothic, anime and fetishist stuff. But not all the Goths are willing to help me and some I encounter actually try to grab me, so I fly up.

      8:00 GMT

      More lucid meditation
      Something made me feel horny in my dream and I decided to wake up and trying to use it with my BF. I had before talked to him and joked about trying to do it. So I wake up in my bed, he is by my side and I start ... you know... calling him into action. He is so surprised and I’m explaining to him that I’m bringing the horniness from a dream I was having, when I notice that something is not quite right and I realise I’m still dreaming. Then I’m left with the decision to either enjoy the lucid dream or to wake up for real and try again what I was trying to do before. But I didn’t care so much for the horniness anymore and I decided to stay dreaming and do my “homework”.
      I cross a wall hoping to cross to some other dream scenario that is a nice place to meditate and I find myself on some porch. There are some kids playing nearby but in general looks good, so I sit down and start doing my visualization and repeating a mantra. It’s all going pretty well, for maybe a minute. I’m struggling not to be distracted by the kids who are now just by my side, when a third kid comes from my left and pinches me. I try not to react, but he tickles me and starts to really hurt me. I guess my “feel no pain” training is not yet 100% working. I am about to resort to violence and send some energy blast to knock them down, but I decide not to give in to that violence – it would totally ruin my efforts to calm down the mind and they would win! So I fly away to the rooftop of a huge tower nearby and decide to sit there, but the vicious kid is still after me. He climbs some metallic ladders on the side of the building to reach me and I detach it from the wall and he falls down what seems to be 100 floors. Now I’m going to sit calmly, but the tower starts to shake and swing and I am about to fall from it. Can’t stay there and so I fly down to some other rooftop and cross another wall in search of a new scenario. I pass by two or three places – a nightscape, some place with stones on the ground, etc – until I find myself in a very comfy room with dim lights, a girl sitting on the floor and another sitting on a sofa, very quiet. I ask them if I can stay there and meditate and they say “Sure! Can we join you?” Fantastic! So I also sit on the sofa and I do once again my visualization and repeat my mantras. This time I think I manage to hold it for a few minutes. Then dream starts to fade but I hold on and continue on it, this time sitting on the floor. In front of me, leaning against the wall, is a big rectangular mirror and I decide to meditate looking at it. I see my reflection. I’m dressed in beige trousers and top but with lots of skin showing. I look a bit chubby, but not ridiculously. It doesn’t disturb me. I keep repeating my mantras, visualizing the Buddha in my heart centre, radiating light and all goes well for a few more minutes. I notice through the reflection on the mirror that more people are coming inside the room and sitting on the floor. I almost wake up again, but when the dream is strong again I am now turned to the centre of the room and see this dozens of people sitting on cushions. They are all looking towards a lady guru at the end of the room. But she doesn’t inspire me confidence. She has a table full of crystals and she says “So, today we have someone special among us!” They all look at me. Then she adds “Not that you are not all special, but you know what I mean!” I have now stopped my meditation and think about leaving this place to but at same time I am curious to see what she is going to say next. She is coming in my direction with some necklace made with lots of different coloured crystals and then I notice my BF just appeared by my side and he’s looking at me like “What is this BS?” I smile and tell him we should leave. Since we’re just against the wall, we cross it and we’re outside in some garden. It’s raining. The garden is lovely, but then I see two rows of dog shelters and decide to check it out. I thought I would find big guard dogs but instead I find tiny cute pedigreed dogs. They are chained to their shelters and the shelters don’t protect them from the rain, so they are all wet and looking miserable. I feel they are there for the entertainment of rich people who own this place, but their care is totally neglected. I mean, they have food and shitty shelter, but they are totally sad, lonely and scared. I start with first little one, cuddling him and doing some reiki and he shows so much love and thankfulness. I cry. I want to do it to all of them, but they are so many! I feel the dream fading and I wish that all animals who are going through similar suffering may always feel loved and happy, no matter what circumstances they are. Then when I’m about to drop out from the dream I have a vision of the caretaker caught in a moment of truth confessing that he beats up the dogs whenever he takes food to tem. I comment with my BF how hideous is that people like him are always getting these jobs.

      9:00 GMT
    10. 12 Nov: Boring dreams and a russian cleaning lady

      by , 11-12-2010 at 05:20 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      22:00 GMT

      Hiking, cooking and walking
      I’m climbing up some mountain with my BF. On the way we meet local pilgrims and a French lady. The path is full of Buddhist sacred places, like this huge terraced slope with thousands of small golden Buddha statues.
      This French lady knew nothing about Buddhism so he was feeling awkward with the pilgrims offerings and prayers. But we talked to her and then she was starting to actually enjoy the whole thing. She spotted a statue that had fallen backwards and went there to put it up again. She left a golden coin on top of that Buddha. Then I noticed it was the only one really shiny around, as if it was new. All the others were darkened by age and weather.
      When we reached the summit of this mountain, we found some houses and tables on the outside. There was a culinary competition going on with people from all over the world. It had just ended and people were stowing their dishes and pans and glass bowls. I helped. Some Italians were talking about a sci-fi series that didn’t air because it was just bad, like a B-series kind of movie. Then like a vision, I get to see some scenes from the series and it’s really cheesy. The spaceships are just cruise boats with their lights on over a dark, star-lit sky. Then there’s this main character who is simply a klingon but with 1000 eyes all over his body. It’s just bad and I laugh.

      Then we’re all downhill, at my mom’s kitchen, were the award ceremony takes place. I’m surprised that all the Italians get awarded, but so the French, Spanish, and many many others, mostly Europeans. I wonder what kind of competition is this, where everybody is awarded. I’m bored and I go to the window. I see a gay couple walking outside on the back alley and I think why don’t they go up the hill, do the same pilgrim’s path we did, but telepathically they say they are not interested, because it seems exhausting. OK, just a suggestion. At this moment I am half-lucid and I think about going to visit the Flea Market near my home. In RL it is tens of kms from my mom’s home, but this is dream world... So as I walk my way there, I’m feeling really amused and I am singing Pink Floyd’s “The Wall” and dancing. People look at me but I couldn’t care less – dream, remember? Then I realise I already walked too much and passed by the street that goes up to the Flea Market. As I turn back I bump into my BF who decided to follow me. I tell him it’s better we take the bus back to the place, 'cause I'm tired of walking.

      4:40 GMT

      “I’m nobody” and snake venom
      I’m on some weird place with Buddhist people I know. People are sitting down on chairs and that’s when I realise they are waiting for our guru to come. I then see the place prepared for him to seat and luckily I get a sit just in front of it. But I get tired of waiting and waiting and decide to go for a walk, leaving something on the chair to mark my seat.
      When I am on some kind of lobby of this building, some other old guru comes in. I have this weird feeling of coming out of my body and I start floating in the air, involuntarily. I feel like a cloud with no defined shape or form. He passes by me and I come down a little bit. He holds my hands (so I did had hands!) and he smiles looking deeply into my eyes (so I guess I also had eyes!). He asks “Who’s this girl?” and someone from the staff replies with a couldn’t-care-less look “She’s nobody!”. First I feel a bit upset but then I also smile and reply “Yes, I’m nobody.” And he releases my hands and continues his way. I follow him back to that teaching’s room where people are waiting on their seats. But on my way I pass by a corridor which has lots of young boys and girls sitting on the floor and some neons or billboards hanging from the ceiling above. For some reason, some of the boys start to tease me, trying to provoke a fight. Because it is kind of playing, I play along and I defend myself, but then they get serious and I have like 4 or 5 attackers simultaneously both from my left and my right. But my kung fu is strong and I kick their asses, although not really understanding what they want from me. I then get on some kind of skateboard I see nearby and I slide out of there.
      I end up on the end of some long corridor and tired, I simply lay down on a sofa that is on the corner. Then some Russian lay who is cleaning the floor, starts cleaning around the sofa and then the sofa itself. I am like “Really? Couldn’t you wait that I get out?” But she is really sweet lady and she rubs my shoulders and gives me a head massage. How nice of her! But she never says a word. Then a door just in front of us opens up and I see a kind of clinic lab. A nurse or whatever is taking blood samples or vaccinating a person. I go inside and I see two guys collecting snake venom for cosmetics. But the snake goes crazy and is spitting venom like a water hose. They warn me to be careful, cause no venom can fall on my eyes or mouth or I’ll die. But I do get all covered in venom everywhere else.


      6:30 GMT

      Beams of light in my hands
      I am in some shared room with other people. I am trying to have some rest but it’s too crowded. Then the Russian lady appears again and she’s cleaning the room. I find out there’s a room next door which has just been emptied and I take all my stuff to there. As I am cleaning up the bed which is full of crumbles of previous guests, the Russian lady comes in again – is she stalking me in dreams? – and she also seems surprised that I’m there. She still hasn’t said a word but we kinda communicate telepathically. I tell her I’m staying in this room and she seems to be ok with it. She won’t tell anybody. She just needs to do her job and clean it up to. In the end she hands me over a very nicely scented soap for my shower.
      Then I am (again) among this people who came to listen to a guru. But this time when entering the place of the teachings, I slide through the floor to some really good seats and pass in front of everybody who is simply walking – bad luck for them! This time this “room” is on some open air space, like a terrace. The guru comes in, he is very old (I guess the same from previous dream) and he needs a translator because his English is not so good. People are eager for him to start, but then the mic doesn’t work and we can’t hear a thing of what either him or the translator are saying. People complain but no one seems able to fix it and the guru doesn’t stop, he keeps going as if he didn’t care if people are listening or not. I make an effort, but then I give up and go to the terrace handrail to see the views and I notice the terrace is actually a boat deck. Below is the ocean and smaller boats are sailing around. Someone shows concern over me being so close to the limit of the deck,
      so I decide to play with this person, by letting myself fall on the water – of course I didn’t really hit the water, I simply flew up and appeared on some other spot on the deck, but sure it was fun to see his/hers (?) face. I’m half-lucid by now but the dream starts to fade. My peripheral vision reduces as lately it’s been happening on fading LDs and everything becomes a bit dark. I ask some DCs around me to help me stay in the dream, by holding me down. It’s a weird strategy but kind of works. The dream stabilizes a bit more, but the darkness doesn’t go away. The DCs look scared and I provide some light to them by emitting white beams from the palms of my hands. They seem amazed and thankful, but I end up waking up anyway.

      8:00 GMT
    11. 08 Nov: plane crash and lucid meditation

      by , 11-08-2010 at 01:50 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      I've been having difficulties in finding the time to post my dreams, so I have a bunch of them waiting in line. I will post recent and old ones, interspersed, or I'll never catch up with the date.


      01:30 GMT

      Volunteering late night
      I'm in what seems to be a mall, doing some voluntary work for some people. But they are quite snobish. I even spend a lot of money in a coat because of them and in the end they just couldn't care less about my efforts or my dedication. It's late night and my boyfriend drives us home through some roads we don't know and he feels lost, but I follow my intuition and we're on the right track.
      [in RL we'd just been doing that: on a mall, getting food for the homeless people and then got back through a new road but our intuition guided us right home. No snobs involved, though.]

      05:05 GMT

      Guru on a librabry on a mall
      Again in a mall. Shop visiting. Remember picking up some bras, but didn't buy them. There was some guy's presence - guy who had a crush on me or vice-versa, but can't recall what happened. Then I am at cash register and there's beautiful fairy dolls on the counter for only 1 EUR. I want to take one for my mother, but as I try to choose which one is cuter, the dolls inside don't match the picture outside. On one of the boxes, there's a cute fairy in red on the box's outside but inside it's military toys. I give up on that.
      Then I move on to a library and remember looking at the books, but soon I spotted a staircase leading to a second floor and because I see many familiar faces, I decide to climb upstairs. On the second floor I find many buddhist practicioners sitting on cushions and some monks and lamas. They are waiting for the beginning of some teachings but I see the teacher and I don't recognize him. It is a young boy, with an indian look, more hindu-like than buddhist, but I'm curious to hear what he has to teach, so I also look for a place to sit. There are seats right in front of his trone,but they are reserved and I am sent to another room where people have to follow the teachings through a TV screen. I loose a bit of interest and I am trying to decide to stay or not, when..


      Plane crash
      I am instantly transported to inside an airplane. It's a big one and it's making a long trip. It's coming from Sweden, or going to Sweden or of a swedish company or at least I think so. I'm sitting on one of the seats and the airplane suddendly plunges almost vertically. I feel that rollercoaster stomach feeling very clearly as if it was real, but I think "It will be just fine." And the plane recovers for a while. Then I have a vision of a road full of ups and downs and bathed by the moonlight when the plane starts to sink again. I turn back on my seat and put my knees on the seat and grab the back of the chair with both arms. It helps reducing the feeling on the stomach, but now I'm concerned that I'm going to die, so that sensation is the least of my problems. Then I have another vision, I'm hovering above the plane and I see it crashing against some huge glass wall. Then I am floating above the earth and see the beautiful oceans, green land and fluffy clouds. Then I feel I am transported back again to inside the airplane and I can sense that the crashing on the ground is about to happen, but then I have another vision of kids playing on the street, laughing and chatting and then... I go into nothingness and in slow motion I start to wake up. I feel like I really died and this is my after-life dream.

      Meditating
      After a while I fell asleep again and I went back to a dream I immediately knew I had already dreamed before the plane crash, but hadn't been able to recall. So now I have an opportunity to remember it again, although it's not so interesting.
      I was in my old office in Brussels and in front of me is my ex-boss who had a big crush on me and vice-versa. I look at him, knowing that I am dreaming, and trying to figure out if he is just a DC or if this is a shared dream. He looks quite real to me, but we never know for sure. I am pushed by my office colleagues to the elevator and we all descend to the -2 level. We're preparing to go somewhere but we wait for a second group (that didn't fit on the elevator with us) and which includes my boss. I wat to see him again, because a shared dream with him would be worthwile exploring. But then someone comes and says he got out on -1 level with the others and I decide it's not worth my time to go look for him.
      I decide to check this floor and to think about next lucid step. I remember that my guru told me to just sit and meditate but once again the usula problem: too many people around who will distract me. Then I see a door that leads to a huge warehouse-type of place and there's people there too, but I spot a kind of pedestal and I fly to sit on top of it. I'm sure nobody will disturb me up there. I cross my legs, I can distinctively see the floor and my legs and the veins in my legs. I feel confortable and because I totally focus my eyes on the floor, all the rest of the dream scenario fades around me. I forgot the vizualisations I was supposed to do, but I just breathe in and out without loosing focus and feel happy that it is working. Then I experience total loss of weight, I feel floating myself in space and then I get a sensation that I am plunging backwards with my head into a black-hole. I don't allow it to scare me. It actually feels very blissful. I let myself go with this falling sensation and then I feel sort of vibrations in my temples, then forehead and then eyes. In the end it feels more like someone is tapping on my head, but I stay relaxed. Then I feel I am close to wake, because I can hear the street noise, the kids going to school, car engines strating, etc. But I hold on and then I wake up to realise I'm still in a dream. I'm back in the warehouse but now there's a mirror in front of me. I look at it and I don't know now what to do. Should have went back to meditation but instead I plunged in the mirror and went to the black void again. More vibrations, more falling sensation. Almost waking up, hearing the street noises again and then waking up again in a dream. This happened maybe 3 or 4 times through different ways and led me to think I was again in a loop not managing to wake up - but this time I didn't really want to anyway.
      Last time I wake up in front of the mirror, I am dressed in a green barely covering the skin, outfit, with a kind of corselet with ties across my chest and stomach with lots of skin showing and hot pants. I felt hot. I wanted to see my boobies. I opened the corselet but was disappointed to see that my boobies were actually smaller than in RL. Oh well... I could try to make them bigger, but what was the point. I am still admiring my dream body so I get all naked. Then some guy comes and says they need to close the warehouse so I need to go away - nevermind he has a hot naked girl in front of him. So I flew away to the exit and now my lucidity was dropping fast. Just remember entering a bar where lots of guys were having a drink but none of them seemed to care about the hot naked lady who just came in. I didn't know anymore what was the point of this dream, so I gave up and woke up.

      08:00 GMT
    12. 23 Oct: Dream within dream, sex with unknown LDer & meeting my guru

      by , 10-31-2010 at 07:07 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      21:30 GMT – sleep

      Japanese stuff again
      Remember anime girls, kimonos and being in some sort of wooden kiosk, asking for directions

      22:30 GMT

      Dream within a dream
      With mom, aunts and uncles at my father-side grandma’s house. Telling mom to hush cause others were asleep. I go to front door and I’m thinking of how I had so many dreams (usually nightmares) about this house and this door (not able to close it when a werewolf or thieves or ghosts were coming, etc). But now that it is just fine, I close it, I lock it and consider I’m putting a stone over this ridiculous fear I had. Then I go to sleep and I have a dream within a dream.
      As I lay down on the dream-bed I think about Nighthawk and how I should invite him to go out some of these days. I visualize ourselves going to the movies, holding his hand. Then I fall asleep in the dream and I dream I’m really at the cinema. He is not there but I recognize many other people in the audience, including his brother. I engage in conversation with some persons nearby and then try to say hello but he is some rows to the front.


      Sex with unknown lucid dreamer
      Then the cinema auditorium transforms into a cliff with carved platforms serving as rows. First I feel vertigo, but then I become lucid and loose fear. I have the feeling other DCs are actually dreamers and I sense that some are even lucid to.
      I cooperate with someone by sending objects through the air by telekinesis. Then I meet this guy who is showing me proudly some trees he created – they are beautifully arranged, almost like a forest ikebana. He also feels melancholic because he is aware they’ll only exist as long the dream takes place, but that ephemerality only makes it more beautiful. We vibrate at same wavelength and we connect immediately and I feel crazy attracted to him, so we end up making out and it evolves into hot steamy sex. Noticed that he had captivating eyes and a really deep look.


      2:50 GMT

      Meeting my guru
      On some huge empty building with pink walls and no one around. I am lucid and playing some tricks like swelling the walls or closing them in. When I closed the walls in I saw movement through the tiny slit left between them and I open them again to see what is on the other side. It’s just a tiny rat but then I also see mirrors, lots of mirrors, which weren’t there before. I see my face reflected in detail, but then the mirror becomes non-reflective and my image becomes just a blur. I look for another mirror but before facing it I think about what I want to do so I can jump through it right away. I remember I wish to meet my main guru again. When I jump through the mirror I feel the dream fading, but I hold on and then I find myself in a similar building, but this time it is full of people. I go around and ask people if they saw my master. Many don’t know but one guys points vaguely ahead. I then find a young Tibetan monk but he doesn’t speak a word of English. I keep going to end of the corridor and then turn right to another corridor. Then I find a room with 3 people sleeping on mattresses on the floor (futon-like). I hear some muttered words in German between 2 people there and then realise the 3rd person is my guru. He raises his head, looking sleepy and surprised. “Here again?” – he asks. I see his face and it is clearly him at the beginning but sometimes it flickers and becomes a bit different, so I’m not totally sure it’s him or mind projection. He looks groggy so I say I didn’t mean to disturb but really wanted to see him. I tell him I’ve been a very bad disciple but will do my best to compensate. Dream starts fading again, but I hold it.
      He lays down and I just lay down by his side, saying I will not bother him with questions for now, but just being there close to him, being able to touch his robes, is already good enough.
      Later when the sun has risen we’re outside with the two other persons that were also sleeping on the room (2 german ladies) and they are the three working with plants. My teacher is discoursing a lot of information about different species of plants they are tendering after and I just listen and watch. Then the dream fades.


      7:00 GMT – wake up
    13. 11 Oct: Magic candies (RPG task)

      by , 10-27-2010 at 08:04 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      23:30 GMT+9 – sleep

      Japan
      Only recall having had dreams related to Japan.

      04:20 GMT+9

      A young master
      A kid venerated as a great master arrives amongst a group in which I‘m included. I feel something strange about him and I try to find some sign that he is not true master. He comes accompanied by other teachers and everybody pays homage to him with lots of bows. Before he sits to give teachings he climbs the walls around like spiderman, I wonder if it’s to impress people and that tells me he might be using some trick because true masters don’t show off. Then I have this insight that his wonderful powers derive from the fact that he knows we’re all in a “dream” while others don’t know or else he would not be more special than anyone else, because we would all have the same powers. Still, I initially thought this was a “dream” but not “A dream” – meaning, I thought I was awake but also that he was truly Awake. Finally I realise we’re in a dream-dream. By now I’m outside this meeting place where I was previously but when I become lucid I go back to see if this kid-master is still there. I cross the glass windows easily but he is gone by now.

      Magic candies (RPG task)
      Then I think about which task I want to perform and I choose the RPG task. But my LD is not strong enough, so I look at my hands trying to sharpen it. Then I look for a portal and I see a long corridor and a mirror at the end of it. I go there and my reflection becomes alive and comes out of the mirror. This reflection-me tries to distract me and discourage me from my intent. I remember my RPG warrior character and as I become it, I use my sword and plunge it into my other me. My other me looks surprised “How could you?”. My other me starts decomposing. It is hideous yet liberating to see my own body rotten and become dust. I feel prepared for my task and I jump into the mirror. I remember the town of Denn, but didn’t remember I was supposed to go to the forest. So I landed on a town, which this time looks like Lisbon, but instead of reality-like, it is entirely cartoon-like. I feel amazed with the originality, the beauty and the detail of this cartoon reality I landed on. After a while I remember I should look for the forest but then how to get there? I don’t want to use another portal because on my last jump I almost woke up. Then I see a subway station and I think maybe I can take the metro and imagine the last stop is in the forest. But I also think that will take too long and I’ll loose lucidity by then. As I think of it, Hermione Granger from Harry Potter appears in front of me and handles me some candies of various colours she says are magical. Each of the colours is related to a place dominated by those colours. So if I wish to go to the woods, I should take a green one. I thank for the gift and I store the candies in a pouch. Unfortunately I don’t have enough time to take the green candy because I loose lucidity and just continue roaming in the town for a while.

      07:00 GMT+9 – wake up

      Updated 10-27-2010 at 08:19 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment
    14. 7 Sep: a portal and a long lucid (both wasted)

      by , 09-08-2010 at 10:20 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      In general, these last days I have been recalling fewer dreams and totally missing good opportunities when they arise, but we all go through these stupid phases, I guess.


      23:20 GMT – Sleep

      Can’t really recall a dream, but I woke up with obsessive thoughts about dream control and the serial dreaming RPG tasks, so either I was dreaming something related to that or not at all and felt frustrated on waking up.

      3:58 GMT

      Random fragments
      I’m with a group of kids, brothers and sisters and apparently we are very famous. There’s a huge group of fans stalking us and we just have time to hide in some house. Inside there’s a maid who becomes our friend and keeps our location secret. For some reason we stay there for the night and it is absolutely imperative that nobody find us there.
      Then I am on some balcony trying to disentangle something (?)
      Then I’m on top of a skyscraper in N.Y. I feel a bit of vertigo.
      Then I am with some blond guy and we are making a pact to help each other keep some secret only to ourselves.


      4:30 GMT

      From a train to a slaughterhouse
      I’m on a train station platform and from inside a train a friend calls me, says it is last call for this train and if I’m not getting there immediately I’ll have to go on the next. I don’t know where we’re going, but I hop in. I sit and realise that in the seat in front are my friend R., L. and some other person. They are bragging about their dreams. One of them says she can easily use the train ride to snooze a little and will surely come up with at least 2 lucid dreams. Initially I feel envious, but I shudder this feeling, don't want to give in to envy and just ignore them. I look through the window and I see bulls on some field. Half-lucid I start thinking which animal suffers the worst: the bull that roams free his entire life and is then slowly tortured and bleed to death in a bullfighting arena or a cow that lives an entirely miserable existence of pain in some factory farm but then dies supposedly quicker? My doubt lies now in the effectiveness of stunners that are used to leave the animals unconscious before slaughter. So I find myself in a slaughterhouse holding one of such devices to test it. I thought about trying it on myself, but I felt a bit scared of what I would feel, so I just test it on an apple – not a very clever idea, it just gets some burning marks on it. [chicken!]

      A portal
      I’m on some house of an old couple and their son. We’re in the middle of an empty room and there’s a portal open in the centre of the room. It just appeared out of nowhere. As it shines and waves in the air, in tones of blue, like water, we wonder what it is and if it’s dangerous to cross it and what it is on the other side. The boy gets behind it and throws something across it in our direction. It was like a piece of garbage. Instead of crossing, it just stays there, suspended in the portal, but it performs a strange mystical dance and then becomes a perfect circle form. Then I don't remember much, but I had no will or courage to actually cross it and think I just left this room and house and continued dreaming outside. [idiot!]

      Buddhists and new agers
      I'm in this foreign country and my mom came to visit me and I decide to show her around. I’m dressed in orange, top and long skirt and with my purple hat. I tell her lots of monks and Buddhist teachers are also in the city at the moment, for some gathering. We see a group of people waiting for a bus on the other side of the road and I tell her “See over there, it’s Mathieu Ricard with some other Tibetan Buddhist monk”. A bit further we pass by another group of monks, and I tell her “And see, look who’s in the middle of these monks, it’s Tich Nhat Hanh.”
      Then we see a large entrance to some place, like a garage, not entirely inviting, but lots of new agers gathered there. They invite us in, they are eating what seems to be lentils and vegetables, so we join them. After the meal they behave a bit childish, like when they start doing this clapping hand game I used to play in camps with other kids.


      5:30 GMT

      Alone in the city
      I am again in this foreign city and I know my mom is visiting, although not with me at the moment. I know it is quite far from home and I wonder how she enjoyed the flight. I feel that flying is becoming quite normal to me and I wonder if I’ll ever be afraid of flying. Then it occurs to me that maybe if I fly to Nepal, I might feel scared because lots of planes fall in that area as their flying companies are not so safe.
      While I think about all this I am entering a building, following two other girls who enter a public toilet. It is quite big with large mirrors on the wall over the sinks. The girls are mocking me or something, but I ignore them. I go to the mirror and I spend a lot of time there, looking at something in my face as I continue thinking. Because I’m abstracted, the dream transforms and I am now on top of a hill sitting with a guy and a girl on a few steps and the mirror transformed into a glass wall by my left side. Through it I can see a road down the hill and a city on the other side of the road.
      Me and this guy and girl are so packed together (don’t know way, as there’s lots of space around) and the guy is flirting me thinking I’m interested.
      But I couldn’t care less, I get up and decide to move. I go downhill and cross the street. From there I see than on the side of this little hill, there's a bigger mountain with a forest and old houses in the horizon, outside the city and for a moment I consider going there. But hesitated, and decided to just fly around the city. I am lucid but honestly can’t really tell when it started (think it was gradual, from the moment I moved away from this couple of friends).
      For a moment I find myself inside a house with a bunch of other people and I change clothes – now I wear a sexy transparent black shirt. Then I’m outside again and I’m a bit distracted and a car almost hits me. I pause on the sidewalk for a while, just looking to the sky and the buildings around. It’s all so luminous. Then I see lots of jets lifting off and I have this impression there’s a lot of rich business people on this city. The jets lift off, one after another, there’s maybe an airport nearby. But then they start behaving strangely, like they are not flying in a straight line, but a bit randomly and then they transform into giant metal birds, with colourful painted wings.
      A Russian guy wakes me up from my mesmerisation and tells me he will drive this car, which is parked right by my side and I’m sitting on the sidewalk, so he’s just warning me to get out the way. He is a bit rude, but he is actually concerned about my safety and I feel he is a nice guy. He is a driver, not the owner of the car.
      Then I cross the street on the pedestrian walkway. I didn’t look to see if it was green for pedestrians and a wall of cars comes in my direction from both sides. But I am not afraid. As they approach I think "cars keep coming at me but this is my dream and they can’t hurt me, I’ll be like Moises opening the red sea and crossing safely to the other side". It didn’t quite happen that way. It just happened that the cars would pass in front of me or in my back without ever colliding with me, very elegantly. That was nice, but not awesome, so I stay there and decide the cars will lift in the air and freeze and make a wall of cars. This time I point my hand to them to make it happen, but all it happens is that they started levitating, but not with the desired effect. I think “Oh crap, I really suck at this control thing.”, but it wasn’t that bad - at least it was a very sucessful levitation of cars.
      Then for some irrational “reason” when I am in the sidewalk I decide I’m not over with this gimmick yet and I walk a bit further down the road until I find a spot that for "some reason” looks good. There I decide to send a purple light ray – actually more like a laser, hard to explain - to the ground, marking an invisible line where the cars will create this wave or wall of cars, when they reach it. But by this time, the traffic diminished a lot. It’s already dawn and I also realised there’s very few people on the street. A guy coming out from a building – looks like a bank – just saw me sending out “laser beams” and with his eyes wide open he freezes on the sidewalk and moves back inside. I can’t believe he is afraid of me!
      I lean on some raised flowerbed outside a building, waiting for some car to pass, but nothing! They totally disappeared. Now I feel pissed. I was sure this time it would work! Then I feel so incredibly lonely, as if I was the only one of my kind in the world - nobody with whom to share my reality and my tricks. Then my cat appears by my side and I hug him, but I don’t feel much better.

      [Then I felt totally disappointed that I didn’t remember to do any of the tasks I was supposed to do!]

      7:15 GMT – Wake up

      Updated 09-08-2010 at 10:34 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment