Lucid-schizo-dreamer

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some party with lots of people from many places. It's fancy but also in some desolate location in some ruins. I get tired and get out of there, to realize we're in an island. I ask someone what time is it and they say 2 am. I say that's not possible. They reply is the jet lag, that's why I am not sleepy. But that is not my issue, my issue is that outside it looks early morning, with sunlight. I encounter some familiar faces and they ask me if I am joining them leaving this place. I agree, because I know nobody else and don't know where I am. So they walk me to a dock and then some small row boats come and get us.
Then we're taking a trip by bus once on land again. Still not recognizing the place as the night falls. Then I recognize the sillouette of Las Vegas in the dark, despite all the city lights being turned off. I just recognize some of the iconic shapes in the dark, like the Sphinx and the Eiffel Tower replicas. When it is day again we stop at a large mall so we can eat or buy anything and stretch our legs. For some reason I encounter my father, who apparently was looking for me and traced me back here. His behavior immediately throws me off as he starts asking questions and making innuendos that I don't even understand. I ignore him for a while and I evade his questions, but allow him to follow me around as I look at the shops for fun. I am wearing a long skirt and a corset and he touches the strings on the back of my corset, asking what happens if he pulls the strings off. I am starting to feel really uncomfortable and tell him to stop. Then I look at beautifful dresses and he asks something like who I am going to wear them for. I say I don't even know what he is talking about. Then we pass by a section of lingerie, to which I don't even look at, but he starts asking if I like this item and that item, all very girly pieces with fruits stamped and not exactly for my age as if he is signaling he wants me to be his little girl again. I tell him he is sick and disgusting and I have had enough. He plays dumb. But I tell him I know his mind, I know he is sexually attracted to me and jealous that I grew up and might get a boyfriend (I say I still haven't had one, but if I did that was none of his business). He looks embarassed and doesn't deny it. I call him all the names I ever wanted to call him and move on, through a pastry shop and then a jewel shop. He still follows me and then tells me to wait while he goes check on the bus we have to take home. I do sit in a bench thinking about what to do next, but I have no intention to join him. Billie Eilish is playing on speakers and I start singing along, and so do other teens around who smile at me. Some even start doing a coreography and I am really impressed. Then some guy I know vaguely from school also sits on the bench and he is the one recognizing me first and asks me about what I am doing here. He offers me a ride with his friends that are coming. I accept but still I feel bad for leaving my dad alone, worrying he might get lost looking for me, despite all.
[Note: My dad was a bit of creep all my life and I do have reasons to feel some disgust and anger towards him, but some of the dreams I have been having are a bit too much, because I don't recall him actually abusing me or saying stuff like he says in my dreams. This is disturbing stuff.)

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I have been having some weird dreams that feel like deep buried memories, but probably are false memories or at least I hope so.

I am a kid and my parents are fighting and mom leaves temporarily to sort something out. I freak out and call for my mom. My dad is upset and does not understand why chose her over him. He claims he is the provider, the one who takes care of me. He also says that I am lazy like my mother and he is totally disappointed how I turned out and turned on him.

My father calls me to his bedroom on waking up. I go to the side of his bed and his behavior is quite improper with me. I run away and hide from him. He gets up and makes threats so I get out of my hiding place. I leave the house and find a hideout in the basement of the building. (It does not look at all like my parents apartment building, but there was indeed a door under the staircase on ground floor, where only a child could get inside and this one is quite similar.) With some help I plan a trip to Nepal to where my mother run away.

I have an experience that feels more like astral projection than a dream. I think I fell asleep lucid and I start seeing some wild place at dusk, with trees and stone walls at the side of the roads, a few cars passing. It doesn't feel like a lucid dream, more like I am remote viewing or astral projecting to a real place. I hover down the road until I see a small town. I check several landmarks looking for names that I might recall on waking up, like the name of the school, but I forget all. Can only remember the school had a man's name, composed of two words and last name ended in "ão". Something, maybe a shop, was called "Atmosfera". Then I feel that I start losing touch and just drift into a norrnal dream based on the previous images. It is now morning in this town and several small shops are opening, Tourists are coming, kids going to school. I see a small café run by an old lady who makes homemade breakfast with a variety of artisanal bread and jams and I have to go inside. I spot a tiny tiny white kitten behind the costumers at the counter and I go grab him before someone steps over the baby. I look for momma cat who is hiding under some furniture where she is feeding the rest of her babies. They are covered in fleas that jump on me. One of the yellow cats has cancer in his ears. I plan to rescue them somehow.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

At some house, looking through clothes my mom found in trash, then also some toys which are to be donated to a kindergarten, checking if they are complete and playing a bit with some of the games.
Then for no reason I see my teacher sitting at the end of this room, with it's back turned to me and I get lucid. I go towards him and surprise him by touching him softly in his back. He is wearing a light brown shirt and he looks to the side to see me. I move my hand down his arm and gently caress him. He shuts his eyes in total surrender. So I kiss him. I notice his lips a bit dry, but soon our salivas mix and our tongues intertwine, while I caress his shaved head. I enjoy every bit of it.
Then I realize there is someone else in the room. We stop and I turn to this person. It looks like my dad, he doesn't seem to recognize me. He turns away quickly and heads to a door. As he opens the door, he looks back one more time and his physiognomy changed. He is taller, slimmer, more tanned and dresses like an Indian man. I follow him but lose him in the movement of people outside. My attention also gets drawn by the majestic landscape and I don't follow the man anymore. In front of me are some amazing mountains covered in luscious green vegetation. And there are people going up and down the mountains, apparently carrying things, picking up fruits, going about many different activities. Strangely, the mountains seem extremely tall ,but people have the same apparent dimension whether they are at the top of it or down at its base. I see a huge strange black bird flying over my head. It is the size of a big eagle, it has a beak like a toucan and strange wings that make a half-moon shape with the first two feathers on each side slightly round and color red. I follow its flight and to my left I see what seem like clouds made of liquid water, which give the impression that everything beneath it, is underwater. There is a type of tree whose top touches the liquid cloud and behaves like kelp in the ocean. Then I turn my attention again to the mountains. I realize the contours of the mountains, the hills and valleys, the rocky surfaces, are all fractal shaped. I decide to take off and fly to see it up close. I am mesmerized by these patterns, and the psychedelic colors they have and then I almost wake up, but instead I have a FA in a totally white empty house. I remember I left my teacher back in the other house and I go around this house calling out his name, hoping to summon him back. Going through some corridor I spot someone that looks like him and other people going after, but when I get closer, it isn't him. But he is also a teacher to these people, who admire him and are respectfully walking him out as he leaves. I am starting to feel the LD fading away, so I decide to get out of here and do my own hing. I find a window and jump to outside. It's again a beautiful landscape with green hills, but this house is right on the slope. I have to climb some moss covered rocks to reach the top of the hill. Some lady who had made some comment to me inside, followed me out the window and insists on asking me something about mind training. Something like, if I feel that realization is a consequence of how much time you practice. If it is an inevitable consequence of your time dedication to practice, because she is feeling frustrated for not seeing results. I don't remember exact words I said, it was very short answer, but it was something in the line of "no, it's not just time related, more about quality and merit."
Then on the top of the hill I see a valley below, but really far below, like we are many kms of altitude up. I decide to jump and fly some more. I enjoy it for some time, once again absorbing the details of the majestic landscape. Until I start descending and land in some city below. I land in a town square between some classical buildings and there is a giant painting on the floor with a reproduction of some classical work of art. I dig my hands in the floor and have fun picking up elements from the painting and throwing them in the air to watch them slowly fall like confetti. Then I want the painting to become a giant trampoline and I have fun jumping and doing flips in the air.
When I am done with it, I walk down a street. The LD is weaker and I don't remember exactly what happened but I end up in a TV studio, where a famous morning show is being recorded and I am sitting with the live audience. The show hostess is demonstrating some modern appliances and its uses and we are offered some bread cooked by a bread machine. I taste it and it is completely bland and tasteless. I feel this is boring and once again I aim for a window to change scenario At some corridor outside the recording area, I see a window. I look through it and down below I see a moat or a lake. I am about to jump to it, when I notice it is full of big animals swimming. First they look like crocs, but on a closer look, I see they are mainly big fish, turtles and some mutant creatures, like fish but with tiny arms and hands. I decide to go get the tasteless bread and feed it to the animals. The bread wasn't a lot but seems to multiply as I split it into bits, so I keep feeding the animals for quite a while. Then I wake up. .

Back to Dreamviews after more than 2 years away! Wow

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

In an Inception like dream, I dream that throughout several days and nights I dream sequential dreams with revelations that I later share with my mother. These dreams are very vivid and reveal information about my alien DNA.
In my first dream within the dream, I am attracted to a forest at night and find myself in a circle of people coming from all directions towards a strange eerie female figure surrounded by light. All the others freeze on the spot. I also feel paralyzed, but my feet lift off the ground and I levitate towards her. She says she has been looking for me. All the others also got the message and were attracted to the forest, but I am the one with the DNA she is looking for.
I want to know more, but she must depart immediately and says she will return to provide me with more information. I catch from her telepathically the word "Trvo" and then I wake up (in the dream).
I tell this dream to my mother and she believes it was a real experience.
Next night I have another dream. The female appears again, now at my home. She reveals I am the daughter of Trvo Årven. She doesn't want to say more, but again I collect images from her mind, telepathically. I see this man, he is tall and handsome, with pale skin and completely white hair. Kind of nordic elfic type. He is in a remote mountainous fortress, he guards something or someone very dangerous. I sense something wrong, I sense that he is alone and about to be attacked. I don't know much more. I don't know if this is the past or the future. But this woman confirms that I am in danger and that I must stay hidden until she can figure out what to do with me.
When I wake up (in the dream) I tell again to my mother. She is totally convinced I am in danger and someone will come for me. She says that we have to go, just grab a few things and leave. When I have the essentials and join her at our van to go away, she surprises me saying we must take with us a pet pig she is taking care of. I get the unexpected job to go grab the pig

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING


22:50 GMT – Sleep

Game like dream. Can’t recall content.

0:00 GMT

Bus ride to village in distress
Just as two nights before (the hovercraft ride dream), I am on a bus with more people crossing dangerous mountain roads with dangerous manoeuvres from the driver and we almost fall down a cliff. We arrive at this remote village in a valley, surrounded by woods. There was some kind of catastrophe there and the basic services are disrupted. More madness is expected soon, riots and violence. A muscled guy comes and starts orienting us. For some reason he seems to befriend me more than the rest of the group. We come to help and we evaluate the situation sitting on a picnic table outside: we try to evaluate how much food, water and other essential goods there are and how long they’ll last and we realise it won’t last more than 4 or 5 days. Because everything is torn apart, I see this village name plate half covered by debris and the only letters remaining visible say “...have ...fun...” I think this is highly ironic.


Fragment
I’m inside a house, with a big window facing the street. It has something like an advertisement stick on the window and I’m trying to read it on reverse, when some guy outside knocks on the window. He wants to speak to me and seems a bit angry. I exit the place.

Mourning a dying man
I’m now entering a room at my neighbour C. house. Her dad is extremely sick (in some kind of coma) and people are all gathered around him, mourning him, as if he was already dead. Strangely, some of my cousins and even my late grand-grandmother are also there, even if they don’t belong to this family or are alive at all. I feel this is very uncomfortable and wonder if they have no hopes that he gets better? On my way out I meet my dad and he says I have to be more loving towards him because one day he’ll also be lying dead like this guy. Sure, but I already know that, no point in stressing that out!


2:30 GMT

More details of a previous dream
Regarding the mosque lucid dream I had had a few nights before, someone comes in this dream to tell me it is actually surrounded by English-style gardens but doesn’t know anything about sacred stones, only that there was some stone-sculpture exhibition there and that a few days some people gathered there to celebrate some ceremony.

I’m no dancer
I’m on some place where it’s playing music and I feel like dancing. I actually think I’m doing ok, when more people join me. I can tell they are professional dancers and compared to them I’m just not good enough, but I’m having fun, so I don’t care. Then I realise I’m in the middle of some dance class final exam. The teacher comes to me and asks me “Do you think you danced well? and I say that on a professional level, of course not. Then she asks some other dancer “Do you think she danced well?” and he says no. Then she says she rests her case and turns her back on me, like outcasting me. I feel a bit upset. I mean, I know I am just an amateur, but my dancing is not that offensive to anybody’s eyes, no need to be so tough on me. Some fellow dancers show solidarity with me but in the end I say it’s ok, in fact she is right. Then I invite them to come along with me to a Vivaldi concert that will happen on some nearby auditorium.


3:40 GMT

A lucid hot date
I’m with Nighthawk watching tv on the couch on a living room. At first we're apart from each other, but slowly we snuggle with each other, our noses are barely touching each other, we look in each other’s eyes and we kiss. He whispered “My god, it’s so good to kiss you.” and I smiled, my heart thumping. He says ”Marry me.” I don’t know what to say and I say it’s complicated. He knows, he gets up, determined about something. I don't stop him, but seconds later I decide to go after him. On the corridor I remember to do a reality check . I put my hand on the wall and it sinks. I get lucid and for the first time on a lucid dream I actually feel frustrated that it is just a dream but I still decide I want to see how this will go on.
I find him on the next room with Riverstone, who is completely focused on something like a book and holding a cup of tea in his hand. I put my hand on the wall, I make a hole on it and I ask them “Do you know what this means?”. Riverstone looks totally disconnected and doesn’t react. Nighthawk has a misterious smile on his face and I don’t understand what goes on on his mind. I grab a piece of dissolved wall on my hand and pour it into Riverstone cup of tea telling him “This is just a fucking dream!”. He says I’m telling nonsense. I turn to Nighthawk and I say “He is always like this, he never believes me!”. Nighthawk, on the other hand, seems to be understanding exactly what I am talking about. Then he surprises me by replying “Well, I, on the other hand, know for sure this is damn real! I am really here with you!!! And I know we're dreaming!” Really? WOW! I was amazed.
I ask him “How...?” and he continues saying that he doesn’t recall those many dreams, but he does recall a few once in a while and that this might be one of those he will remember. I tell him he must absolutely remember this one!
At this point I realise that Riverstone is no longer with us. I turn to Nighthawk, absolutely thrilled and exhilarated with this totally lucid dream encounter. We smile and we kiss each other again, more passionately. We fall on the bed. I feel delighted with everything. Then his image starts to flicker and we realise he is losing lucidity and waking up. He says “Damn, not yet! I want to stay with you!” and I try to keep him there with me, grabbing him firmly. But he becomes just a blur, a shadow, until he totally disappears, like sand through my fingers. I find myself in this empty room, happy and sad at the same time. I sit on the floor and I stay there for a long time, hoping that he might re-enter the dream. But when I no longer feel the residues of his presence I decide there’s no point in staying longer, so I also wake up.

5:00 GMT

Excursion on the USA
I’m with Riverstone on some excursion in the US. We’re on a bus. A pregnant lady is just sitting in front of us. We’re passing by N.Y. and Riverstone is screaming joyfully every times he sees a landmark he recognizes. Later we’re outside any city, on some road leading to some other totally different place. We find ourselves in a swamp area. We see alligators on water and for some strange reason there’s a black guy swimming bravely among them. I worry for the guy but also comment that is so funny to be seeing alligators as I just had some conversation with someone about alligators during the day.


6:35 GMT

Love letter
I am again on a bus and some stupid guy/kid reads out loud a love letter I wrote to someone else. Although he doesn’t mention my name, he knows it’s mine and I believe everybody else will also know it’s mine. I wonder how he got it and feel terribly irritated. But instead of reacting, I just ignored him. I guessed this way I wouldn’t actually reveal myself and people would be in doubt. Only when the bus stops and we start coming out of it, I step on the guys passage and confront him with his action. I put my finger on his nose and make a threatening look and tell him something that scares him. He looks asian and familiar, but I have no clue who he actually is. He doesn’t like being threatened and tells me “Ok, ok. But why don’t you just tell the guy your feelings?” And I respond “But I did! What do you think that letter served for! I just wonder how you ended up with it in your hands.” He doesn’t confess.


Camp of giant cats
When we get out, we’re in some kind of camp and everybody starts smoking or is coughing. I comment it must be the lung cancer camp and the joke is not well received. Someone scolds me. We walk a bit further and I start to see lots of big houses, like an entire village and the most surprising of it is that I see giant cats looking behind them or inside them. Cool! I don’t kno if the cats are dangerous, but I start taking pictures of these amazing site.
[inspired by the cat sanctuary of this guy in the US, that collects abandoned and wild cats and takes care of them in this lovely sanctuary with tiny houses for the cats, as a real village.It even as a church and a wall-mart.]

8:30 GMT – Wake up

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was so exhausted yesterday that I knew I would not do much dream recall this night. I actually woke up in the middle of the night, with dreams floating in my mind, but I just couldn’t care less and turned to the other side to go back to sleep. In the morning I was feeling a bit more refreshed and wrote down a few, especially because they were one of a kind.


22:30 GMT - Sleep

1 wake up, recorded no dreams


5:00 GMT – 2nd wake up

Dentist waiting room and cinema
I’m with my mother on the waiting room of a doctor’s office (I think the dentist) and for some reason to have an appointment we need to have a key (?). My memory fails me a bit on this part, but I think for some reason they didn’t want to give us a key – maybe the key was the equivalent of making an appointment, maybe they didn’t want to give us one, because they had the agenda full? Anyway, I think my mother got to steal two keys without them noticing and we just left all happy with the achievement. Then she invites me to go somewhere, like the cinema, which I think is a great idea, but I am worried that my light summer clothes will be uncomfortable when we leave the cinema to the cold night.

Performative arts camp
I enter a bus full of youngsters. We are on a trip to somewhere. I don’t know anybody. They are clearly from different countries and nationalities but not one looks welcoming to me. I look for an empty seat and I found one by the aisle by the side of two other girls (there’s 3 seats on each side of the corridor, like in an airplane). The chair in front is reclined and I have very little space to fit. I have a black backpack in my lap and it’s really cool because it has a flexible screen on it, showing continuously the Matrix code animation. That seems to attract some attention, but still, nobody gets friendly with me.
We all get out at some kind of camp and soon I realise it’s like an artistic camp. We have an auditorium and some kids are rehearsing a play, others sing and I just wonder what am I doing there, since I have no artistic talent. But I see other youngsters also looking a bit lost, so I chill, thinking I should not worry and should just watch and go with the flow.
Then a girl makes a dramatic entrance in the auditorium. It’s C.L., a friend from my childhood and my neighbour for many years. She was always a drama queen, so this suits her. She is wearing a very theatrical dress, like a wedding gown but with splashes of colour. She is singing and heads to the stage where she makes some theatrical show.

James Bond emotional
Then I have a strange dream that I am watching a James Bond movie (but the movie is like floating in the air, because there’s no TV). By my side is my dad sleeping – he always falls asleep watching movies. But in this James Bond instead of the action, sex and espionage, Bond is having a candid conversation with his father and it all gets very emotional. The even weirdest part is that meanwhile my father has awaken and is crying because of the movie. I feel doubly eerie with so much strangeness and this leads me to awake. I wake up in my bed and someone is by my side. But instead of my boyfriend it is still my father that is sleeping there. What? I take some time before I understand I’m still dreaming, then I really wake up (I hope).


6:30 GMT – 3rd waking

Toilet drama (again) and a fake enlightenment
I woke up, wrote down my dreams and apparently I’m still awake and I go to the toilet before going back to sleep. The toilet is totally different from the toilet in my (real) home, but I don’t notice that at all. I feel totally comfortable with this version of it, as if I have used it my entire life. I just notice after using it that the flushing is not working. I check the cistern and it’s dripping water. I try to discharge at least some water but it really isn’t working, so I try to take the cistern cap to check the mechanism and eventually fix it (did it many times), but the thing is seriously jammed and I stupidly put my foot on the toilet seat to push and I end up with my foot inside the toilet, with the water, urine and mushy toilet paper all around my foot. Yuck!!!
I am disgusted and I think to myself – “My god, the shit that happens in my dreams is starting to happen in RL!”
[Usually in my dreams I get lucid because I simply know that I’m having a dream - no need for dream signs or reality checks, it just happens. This time I had no idea I was having a dream. I was totally, absolutely convinced this was real.]
So then I thought “It’s a good opportunity to practice reality checking. This way in my dreams I will remember to do it every time I’m on a toilet again facing yucky situations like this, as it recurrently happens.”
So I decided to put my hand on the wall trying to go through it and I was absolutely amazed when my hand started to sink on the dissolving wall. I couldn’t believe it! It never actually occurred to me “After all, this is just a dream!” No! Instead I believed that I was actually manipulating real matter like in dreams – I was convinced I had had a little enlightenment! It felt awesome! It felt amazing! It felt... Ohhhh, now my face is also sinking in the wall! And all of a sudden I open my eyes and it’s just my hand and face sinking into the pillow... Oh, crap! What a disappointment... I really don't know if I should classify this as a lucid dream. It was more of a wrong-reality entrenchment, so I'll call it a reverse-lucid, but it had all the characteristics of a lucid dream. I was fully aware and conscious, I simply mistook that reality for this reality. Freaky.

Warm snow
I just had one more quick dream. It was early dawn, it was summer and I am at home. My father is staying there to. We both wake up because something strange is happening outside. I go to the window and I see snow falling and coming through the window. There are a few people on the street also amazed at it. Everybody is in summer clothes, it feels warm and even the snow is just at ambient temperature. How can that be? I just have a quick thought that even climate change cannot cause warm snow in summer and that there must be more to it, something more bizarre. I start having a bit of lucidity and that's when I wake up again.


7:30 GMT – Wake up