Hyu's Adventures

A woman comes to my desk to inform me that the manager would like to see me.
I get up immediately and begin the long walk to the manager's office.
I pass by thousands of cubicles, all looking perfectly identical to one another.
The room is huge. But it's all just cubicles, sitting on a bright white and spotless white floor,
which slightly reflects what is above it.

Everyone I pass is wearing the exact same grey suit with white shirt combo.
Everyone is in shape, everyone has the same hairstyle, the same hair color, even the same eye color.
No color can be found in here. None whatsoever. Regardless of where you look, it's all white or grey.
There are no distractions. No family photos, no items on any desk besides a monitor, mouse and keyboard.
Everyone is working at maximum efficiency.

Eventually I get to the managers office. A man is leaving the office right as I arrive.
This confirms that I have been walking at precisely the right pace.
I enter the office.

"There has been a problem with your daily psych eval this morning."
"You are to be at the primary psych facilities in 12 minutes for a more in-depth test."
"Yes."

During the exchange, the manager has not even glanced at me once.
I leave the office, and begin the even longer walk to the psychiatric facilities.
As I'm walking past all the cubicles again, I notice a woman, who on closer inspection appears
to be adjusting one of her contact lenses.
As she gently pokes the grey lens, it moves just enough to reveal that she is hiding beautiful green eyes behind them.

And this is why my psych test isn't clean. It's because I notice these things.
It's because I can still occasionally feel emotions.
You're not supposed to. That's how the system works.
It's easy to achieve complete obedience and efficiency without emotions.

I arrive at the office for advanced psychiatric evaluation.
There is only one such office for the entire facility.
Tens of thousands of people, yet I'm the only one here.
I'm the only one who failed the daily eval.
I enter the office. It is very small.
It just houses a simple chair and a robot. (who looks suspiciously similar to glados)


The robot begins to scan me. I try to keep my mind clear of any thoughts.
But I know that this isn't going to help. I'm going to fail this eval. It is inevitable.
In order to disable all emotions completely, the cocktail of drugs we receive daily isn't enough.
Abstinence from all stimuli is also required.
Which is why there are no colors, no music, no socializing, no hobbies...

But the system isn't perfect... because I have seen colors. I have heard music.
I have done so in my dreams. My lucid dreams.
And although it is said that nobody has dreams anymore due to the drugs, I still do.
I think it is because I am a lucid dreamer. Nothing can take my dreams from me.

"Your evaluation is now complete. Return to work."
"Yes."

I leave the room, initially thinking that I might have tricked to robot.
No. It can't be. Someone is probably going to intercept me on the way back.
This is it then. I suppose it is over for me.
I don't really feel any emotional reaction to these thoughts at all.
Perhaps it is the drugs, or maybe I just don't care to live this life any longer.
A woman stops me.

"Excuse me?"
"Yes?"
"Why are you here?"

I got lost in thoughts...
Oh shit. I didn't return to the programming facilities!
I walked deeper into the psych facilities by accident.
This is really not supposed to happen. I can't be here.
And it is so easy to notice that I'm out of place here because they wear different uniforms.

"What is this?"

She points to a device attached to my belt...
It is an old MD player attached to it.

Not only am I in possession of a musical device. It is also partially red!
I get a bit of a mirror's edge vibe from it. The forbidden color red, the bright rooms...
The woman looks very uncomfortable and worried.

What now? Do I wait for them to come and take me? Do I run?
No, I can't possibly run. We are all dependant on the drug.
If I stop taking it, the withdrawal effects will kill me.

But then it hits me. I'm deep inside the psychiatric facilities.
This is where they make the drug. It's in the room right in front of me.
If I had enough of it, could I slowly decrease my dosage over time?
But that would mean walking into the laboratory, past a hundred scientists,
take the drug, then run, get out of the building, and survive out there alone?
I don't even know what the situation outside is.

But suddenly it becomes clear. I am not me. I am not Hyu.
Right now I am another person. And this persons plan is to escape today.
Why else would I have a red music player with me?
Why else would I have walked deep into the psychiatric facilities?

"Yes."

You're always supposed to answer yes, in order to acknowledge what you have been told.
I gently push the woman aside and enter the laboratory.
The scientists all look at me. It is so easy to see that I don't belong here at all.
But they are afraid because this is not part of their daily routine.
They just resume their work.
I walk up to the conveyor belt where the finished drug arrives, neatly packaged into futuristic syringes with 100 shots each.

"HALT!"

Ah, the cavalry has finally arrived. Took them long enough.
About a dozen man in full, black, army gear, armed with assault rifles enter the laboratory from the opposite side.
Aren't they overreacting a little here?

"SLOWLY STEP AWAY FROM THE CONVEYOR BELT!"

I wonder what the odds would be to get out of here alive if I ran.
They are still rather far away. I don't think they have a clean shot from all the way over there.
But I don't think I could make it.
My mind is too clouded by the drugs.
I don't think I could improvise, heck I can't even remember how to run.

Oh! Of course! That's what the music player is for! Emotional stimuli!
I inspect the player more closely and find some earphones attached to it.
I put them on slowly. They don't react to it.
I hit play.



Not at all what I was expecting. But it will do.
I pick up one of the syringes.
Nope? Still nothing?
I calmly begin to walk back into the direction I came from.
They keep yelling at me to stop.
I increase the volume of my music. Problem solved.
I mean, what are they going to do? Shoot me?

Someone attempts to block my passage through the door leading back out of the laboratory.
I try to push him aside, but he won't let me...
I need to get out now, so I throw a punch in his general direction.
I end up hitting them in the nose. There's blood. Lots of it.
This time I manage to push him aside since he's in shock.

Holy shit! I just punched someone in the face!
The guards accelerate their pace. Time to run.
If I run continuously in the same direction, I'm bound to find an exit right?
I mean, how big can this building possibly be?
On the first corner I get rid of my shoes, because they slide way too easily on the polished floor.
My jacket and shirt quickly follow because they are horribly uncomfortable.
I feel like the guards are slowly catching up, but fortunately they're not using their weapons.

After a few minutes of running I feel extremely exhausted.
I am fairly certain that I have reached the end of the building now, but there is no door.
I run off to the left, alongside the outer wall.
There has to be an exit here somewhere... I hope.

Eventually I encounter some curtains and push through.
The building looks much more normal here. No shiny white floors anymore.

I spot a green fire escape sign. Colors! I suppose people are not supposed to come this far.
Finally a door that looks like it leads outside. Don't be closed...

I push it open. Fresh air. The sun.

A spot a ladder that leads down to the ground.
I'll have to climb over some railing to get to it.
But the guards catch up with me before I can do so.

"STOP RIGHT NOW!"

They could just drag me back inside now.
There's no longer a need for weapons in order to stop me.
But I know how to deal with this.
All I have to do is to point up.
I do this until everyone is looking up... at the blue sky.
That leaves them completely in shock and I climb down.

There's nothing really here, besides that ridiculously large building I was just in.
No sign of anybody else.
I just pick a direction at random and walk.
Nobody is going to come after me now.
I do realize that I'm most likely not going to make it.
I don't really have any survival skills.
But I don't mind, because right now I am more alive than anyone in there will ever be.

I forgot to add a song to my last DJ entry!
I can't think of any music that fits this dream, so instead, here's what I'm listening to as I write this:


I'm at an office in a clinic. I'm sitting on a simple chair in the very middle of the room.
I've been waiting here for some time, bored out of my mind.
A nurse is supposed to join me in order to give me the results from some kind of medical test that was performed on me.
After some time a nurse finally enters the room.
She tells me that she has good news, that they have finally figured out what is wrong with me.
The nurse suggest beginning treatment immediately.
I'm ecstatic to hear this.

However, I now also realize that this is a dream.
The nurse somehow notices that I have become lucid. She seems sad because of it?

We are interrupted by a doctor barging into the room.
She immediately steals the nurses charts from her hands.
After looking over them she sends the nurse away.

"I will take care of this."

I don't like this. The nurse seemed very competent and kind, whereas the doctor seems uninterested in my health.
She is just here to do her job and get paid. She couldn't care less about who I am or how I feel.
After grabbing something from a drawer she pulls up another chair and sits right in front of me.
She holds a syringe and a vial containing an odd purple liquid.

"Hold out your arm for me."
"Okay."

I hold out my arm as she draws some of that liquid into the syringe.
I want to ask her about what is actually wrong with me, and about what
the devil she is about to inject me with.
But I don't ask anything because I feel really uncomfortable.
The color of that liquid strikes me as really odd.
Are you supposed to inject purple stuff into people?

She grabs my arm tightly, presumably so that I don't move.
My skin offers little resistance to the syringe.
The needle punctures it easily.
I'm pleased that it doesn't hurt.
She injects me with a large quantity of the liquid.

As she retracts the syringe she smiles.
And not the good kind of smile. The I just fucked you up and I'm a psychopath kind of smile.
Blisters start forming very rapidly all over my arm.
They quickly grow to the point where they are about to burst.
There's a huge amount of liquid in them. And I sense them pulsating. (I'm not googling a fitting picture for that...)
WHAT THE FUCK!
I notice the doctor as she attempts to go for my other arm.
Oh hell no. I slap the syringe out of her hand and quickly get up.

I am now in full panic mode.
I turn towards the only door in the room and charge at it.
Due to fear of the door being locked I throw my entire weight at it, attempting to break it open.


The lock gives in under the force emitting a shattering sound and separates from the door.

Blinded by a bright sun I try to reorient myself.
Wait what? I'm outside?
I quickly realize that I find myself stranded on top of a skyscraper.
There's only one door leading back into the building and that's where I came from.
This doesn't make any sense! Also the skyscraper is really thin. Like only 5 by 5 meters.
I have nowhere to run.


The doctor emerges from the room holding a much larger syringe this time around.
Like, a meter long. She's holding it like an assault weapon.

"Come over here. You need your medicine!"

I don't think so. I look back at my arm and it looks even worse than before.
The biggest blister bursts open and some thick yellow goo starts to ooze out of it.
It is utterly disgusting. Oh but it gets worse. So much worse.


Fat wasps start to climb out from inside the blister, through the puncture.
There's goo all over them, and they immediately begin to climb my arm.
I contemplate attempting to rip my arm off my body, but I understand that this is not possible.
The doctor approaches me slowly, carrying the overly large syringe on her shoulder.

But then, during all the panic, a short moment of clarity.
I am dreaming. I try to forcefully forget about the condition of my arm, knowing that it will return to normal.
The doctor is getting uncomfortably close to me, and I have no room left to move backwards...


Oh for fucks sake!
The name tag on the doctors lab coat...
It reads "Dr. Faye"
There is just barely enough time to go from full on panic to being seriously pissed.

"Fuck this, I'm out of here."

I stretch out my arms, and let myself fall backwards, down the skyscraper, looking at the sky all the way down.
Weeeeeeeeeeee
...
Uhm...
This scene is going to change before I hit the ground yes?

My vision fades just before I hit the ground.
Good...
*BAM!*

OH GOD FUCK WHY...
Oh...

I thought I went splat there for a moment.
But I actually just landed on my back in a new scene.
I get up and begin to orient myself.
My arm is back to normal, so we're off to a god start.


Oddly enough I seem to have ended up in some kind of garage?
Like, a pit box for race cars.
Usually if I change scenes without thinking of a destination I land on a certain beach.
I end up there quite often, but not this time for some reason.

I rub my hands together, trying to purge my mind of the images of my arm.
Then I spot it. A suspiciously large object hidden beneath a white sheet.
I know exactly what this is!
Pulling away the sheet reveals my xg bike.
AWW YEAH!


I walk around it inspecting it from all angles.
The polished exhaust manifolds reflect the bright lighting in this garage.
I touch them and slide my finger all the way back to the end of the exhaust pipes.
Thinking about it, I haven't raced this in many years.
I did have a dream about it a long time ago, but I don't think I raced it.
Deep Dreaming - Barfight - Earth from Space - Exploring Childhood Dreams - Yuya - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

I could use my lucidity to attempt to resolve my current dream issues.
But I decide to postpone it. The dream is stable and I know that is going to be wonderful if I race.
Yes. I need some me time. Dreams are about having fun. I don't feel like resolving complex issues right now.

I climb onto the bike. It feels exactly right.
I flip the switches on the dashboard. ECU, FUEL, IGN.
And it lights up in vibrant neon colors.

I spot a pair of noise canceling plugs, resting next to some sunglasses on the fuel tank.
I promptly stick the plugs into my ears. This nullifies all sound completely. I also put on the sunglasses,
which fit nicely. I detach the auxiliary oil supply, which was keeping the engine nice and warm.

I gently feather the throttle, and kick the starter hard.
The engine roars to life. The sudden sound pressure feels like a punch to the stomach.
It almost hurts. My entire body vibrates, as it resonates with the sound emitted by all 20 cylinders.
Even though my hearing is muffled, the sound is painfully loud because it is amplified within this garage.
The sudden vibrations greatly increase the quality of my dream.
My vision is colorful and sharp now. All of my senses are engaged.
I am in a pit box. There's a race track right outside.

I pull the clutch all the way back and shift into first.
A loud mechanical "clock" is emitted by the transmission and the dashboard display changes from N to 1.
I lean my weight all the way forwards, feather the throttle and just let go of the clutch.
After some wheel spin I am propelled out of the pit box and begin driving down the pit lane.
I flip on the "G" switch on my dash board. This turns on an odd device that provides high amounts of downforce without causing any drag.
Almost as if gravity was magically increased for the bike.
With a precise foot press the engine changes into second and the bike wobbles forward and backward a bit.


I start to gain speed and once I'm onto the track I punch it.
At first the revs climb slowly, but then once I make it past 7k rpm I hear both turbos slowly spinning up, providing an enormous boost in torque.
This violent increase in power actually catches me off guard and I accidentally change into 3rd.
There is some more wobbling and the engine emits a rather unhealthy sound as I have starved the turbos from their much needed exhaust pressure.
This is to be expected as I shifted way too soon.

I gain some more speed before I need to slow down for a sharp hairpin.
The brakes are loud and cause some vibration, but they are perfectly precise and very powerful.
I shift back into second and engine screams up for a split second as the internal computers match the engine speed to that of the gearbox,
followed by a loud rumble due to unburned fuel exiting the exhaust pipes.

I throttle up gradually as I am exiting the corner. The turbos spin up again. This time I'm determined not to shift early.
I grab the handles tightly, holding on for dear life. The acceleration brutally increases all the way through
10k, 11k, 12k, 13k rpm. The front wheel begins to lift off the track and I quickly shift into 3rd.
This time there is no wobble. The gearbox computer executes the shift precisely the moment when my foot presses the shifting pedal.
The front wheel slams back onto the track with a loud tire screech.

Two lines of blue leds on my dashboard grow towards each other as the rpm increase, indicating that I am within the power band.
I take it all the way up past 14k, until red leds at the end of the blue led strips light up,
indicating that it is time to shift...

I am now in 4th, doing close to 500km/h, as I enter a long corner. I lean my body into it, bringing the glowing orange exhaust manifolds into my field of view.
The forces on my body increase, until eventually belts in my pants pull together automatically to cut off the blood flow to my legs.
This just barely prevents me from passing out. I am unable to breathe until I exit the corner and the forces normalize.

I lift my body up a bit, so that I emerge above the protective wind shield.
The air pushes against my face hard. It hurts. I am so alive right now.
I try to scream as loud as I can. My lungs can just barely overcome the air pressure.
But there is barely any sound. The engine is just too loud. I cannot compete.

But that doesn't matter. This is MY dream. I am alive. I am in control.
After some laps the dream fades. I don't care.

The contrast between "bad" and "good" adrenaline was quite interesting.
Could have done without the bad part though. The images are still burned into my mind. x_X