maboroshi

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was in group meeting room with about twenty other people. The room was only partly lit, with a drab, greenish white, fluorescent light.

The room was divided into two parts. The back part was kind of empty, with maybe a long, folding table. The front part had a few couches and chairs. Most people were in or near the front part. The area was so full that people were standing up behind the back couch.

I had been standing way back in the back area, by myself. But now I walked forward to listen to what was going on. A young woman was leading the discussion. She sat on a couch on my right side.

To the woman's right, on the same couch, and on another couch, probably the back couch, sat two young men who looked a lot alike. They were both tall, thin, pale, and shaved-headed. They wore nice, casual khakis and dress shirts. I felt like I'd known both of the guys from high school.

I came to understand that this was a group discussing alien abductions. Aliens existed and were among us, in a very obvious way. And, somehow, the young woman was serving as something like a go-between, between the aliens and the people in this room.

Some of us in the room had been abducted. Others of us were, apparently, trying to be convinced to volunteer for abduction.

I was now sitting on a couch opposite the young woman. The man to the young woman's right was now speaking about his own abduction experience. I now realized that the young man's head had been shaved by the aliens, while they'd experimented on him.

The woman asked the man if the experience was really bad. The man said that most of the experience didn't really bother him at all.

The only part the man hated, he said, was when the aliens did a mental probe on him. He said that it felt really terrible to have all his memories drawn up. He could see them. But he wasn't controlling them. And he knew he was only watching them because someone else -- the aliens -- wanted to see them.

The man mentioned another part of the experiment he hated. As the man described it, it first sounded to me like the aliens had put the man through some kind of system where they'd caused his body to work as if it were under a lot of stress. But then the man said that the aliens had actually shut down the man's body entirely. He was dead, but still conscious.

This man's discussion was supposed to convince people that alien abductions weren't so bad. It didn't convince me. I got up and walked toward the back area. But I knew the second man was going to talk. I wanted to listen to him as well. I think I may still have been considering volunteering for an abduction.

Dream #2

I was in a group meeting room, like in the first dream. It was divided into two areas. The front area was full of people, and the back area only had a few people. I think most of the people were Indian. The room was warm with incandescent light.

On the right wall a movie was playing. All the couches in the front area were arranged to face the movie, like a makeshift movie theatre. I think everybody had plates of food.

There were plent of seats open on the couch. So I sat down on one. The couch felt really nice. It was a dull blue or pink, and it had a kind of soft, crushed velvet feel to it.

I looked up at the movie. Some really pretty Indian girl was either being taught or teaching someone how to make a kind of honeyed bread. It basically looked like a cornbread square, glazed in honey, with a walnut in the center, on top.

The girl was dressed in a traditional Indian outfit. There was a sense of sexuality, romance, and tradition all wrapped up in the food making.

I got the idea that this screening was a kind of preview for the film. The film wasn't finished yet, and we were all supposed to give our feedback on it, so that it could be tweaked for more audience enjoyment.

But I started to wonder if maybe this film wasn't a bit too stereotypical toward Indians, what with the food-making and tradition and so forth. I wondered if Indians would be offended by a film like this.

It didn't occur to me that the film was actually Hindi (it was -- it had English subtitles), and that pretty much everybody else in the room was Indian.

There was a father-like man standing near the couches. He had dark skin and a bit of a pot belly. He wore a button-up shirt of really nice, pale-blue material and nice, dark slacks. I thought I might go hang out with him, since I figured he'd have a better idea about all this stuff than I did.

Dream #3

It was daytime. I was walking through a forest, probably a pine forest. I was walking along a slope, not on any trail. The pine trees were all spaced well apart. The ground itself was black. It may have been black cinder soil, or (I think now) the forest could have been burnt down.

There must have been a road at the top of the slope, up to my right. Suddenly people came blasting down the slope! They were all laying, extended straight out, with their legs crossed and their arms crossed over their chests. And they were propelled so that they were rolling, tumbling, down the slope.

I followed these people down the slope. I reached a point where there was a cliff. I couldn't go any farther. The cliff must have been about fifty meters high. It ended with a flat valley of forest, of the same black-soiled, or charred look as the area up around me.

But one of the rolling, tumbling people, in his movement, had rolled right off the cliff.

I suddenly knew that this was all some game. People were thrown, almost at random, down the slope. There were all kinds of random land formations down the slope. Depending on fate, and the skill of the person, the person either would or wouldn't survive going down the slope. Survival, as well as something else, would determine who won this game.

But this person's path had been directly toward this cliff. There were a few places, going down the cliff, where the person managed to grab hold for a moment. But everything in the cliff was really soft. The cliff was like some shelf of really soft, brown coal.

Finally the person managed to grab onto a thick tree root that was growing out of the cliff wall. It might have been able to get him over to a thin ledge.

But it was obvious that the root was dead and rotten. The more the man pulled up on it, the more it was shifting its way out of the cliff. And, besides, even if the man got to the ledge, he'd be trapped there. There was no way down.

So the man just gave in to the fact that he'd lost. He either let go of the tree root or held onto the tree root until it finally snapped out of the cliff. The man fell maybe about twenty meters and died on impact.

There were already a bunch of people down on the ground by now -- some alive, some dead. The living had set themselves out in the valley, as if they were going to camp there for the night. Some of the living headed over to the man's body after they saw that he'd fallen to his death.

I walked back up the slope. I reached the top of the slope, where the road was. I saw cars passing along the road. I then understood that the people were tossed out, in their rolling positions, from the cars. This was what gave them such great speed (??? -- in a perpendicular direction?). I may even have seen another batch of people thrown out from the cars.

I think my mom, or at least somebody I knew, was up around here. I'm pretty sure, anyway, that somebody was calling my name or talking to me, probably from a slight distance, maybe even across the road from me.

I may have spoken a little bit with the person who had been speaking to me. But, even though I think the person was looking forward to me helping them with something, I told the person that I would be back in a moment.

I knew there was a really safe way to get down into the valley. I walked down the slope and kept going forward, in the direction of the road. The cliff merged into the slope farther along, and the slope became very mild.

I walked down along the mild slope to the valley. I figured that once I got down to where everybody was, I'd help bury the man I'd seen die, out of respect for him. But I also probably figured that I'd help bury all the dead. This game didn't make any sense.

Dream #4

I was sitting in some restaurant, probably a fast-food restaurant. It was daytime, and there was plenty of light coming in from the windows. There were a lot of people in the restaurant. The place felt packed, busy, and humid, like a coffee-warmed store on a winter's day.

I sat on the right side of a table for four. A police woman sat across the table from me. I don't think either of us had any food. The woman was white, kind of short, a bit overweight, with a round, pale face. She had frizzy, red-brown hair, drawn back in a braided pony tail. She had kind of thin eyes, pale blue-green. She looked like she may have been in her early twenties.

The woman was telling me something about how disappointed she was in me. I'd either done or said something that had really gone against her expectations of me.

Now she was pretty much through with me. I knew this was bad for me because, since she was a cop, now that she was through with me, she'd probably have the other cops start giving me a bad time.

The woman stood up to leave. I may have stood up to try to get her back. But I don't think I really knew what to say. So I probably gave up and sat back down just as soon as I'd stood.

Dream #5

In my head, I was talking with either my old friend R or his first or second wife. I'm pretty sure that the conversation eventually became between the first wife, N, and myself. As I had this conversation in my head, I was cleaning out a bathtub in a bathroom with kind of dim, warm, incandescent light.

I was telling N that I hated even talking to her and R. They seemed to love making me feel inferior to them. It was even like they operated as a team, taking turns saying nitpicky things or one-upping me, when the other person couldn't find the right thing to say.

I probably said that this was why I didn't want to go to some thing that N had invited me to. This probably ended the conversation.

As I was finishing the conversation, I noticed that my efforts to clean the bathtub were really failing. I'd sprayed cleaner all over the tub, and I was wiping the tub off with a sponge.

But I just seemed to be taking whatever grime there was in the tub and spreading it all over the entire tub. The spray bubbles themselves only seemed to be gathering up the grime and expanding it, so that now my tub's surfaces seemed to be coated in soapy grime.

I might possibly have realized that I'd need to wipe and re-wipe the surfaces before I got all this stuff off. The first spraying was to get everything wet. I'd have to spray again. Then the wet stuff would start coming off, leaving the surface clean.

Dream #6

A commercial from the late 1970s. A thin, prettyish, blonde woman was pushing a cart through a grocery store. A male narrator was talking about wise choices a mother should make while shopping.

The "wise choices," obviously, meant buying whatever product the narrator was advertising.

The view then switched to a view from the cart. The woman's face was framed in a circle in the center of the screen. The rest of the screen was black. This was supposed to be the view of the woman's baby, who was sitting in the cart.

The woman was making all kinds of kissy faces to the baby. The male narrator was now saying, in connection with making wise choices while shopping, that a baby will always imitate whatever a mother does. This implied that the baby was probably making kissy faces back to the mother.

Suddenly the mother let out a flat, kind of raspy burp. The mother was surprised, and a little apprehensive. She knew the baby would probably imitate her burp.

The view now shifted to a view more like the mother's view. The "baby" in the cart was actually a pretty, skinny girl, maybe seven years old. She was sitting in the basket of the cart, rather than the seat of it. But I felt like she was probably too old to sit in the cart, like a baby would.

Sure enough, the little girl, kind of looking up to her mother like a baby would, burped, in almost the same way as her mother did.

It was then nighttime. The mother was in her bedroom, which was pretty big. It was dark. But somehow the mother could be seen, maybe in a nightgown, masturbating.

The little girl, standing in the hallway in only underwear and a tank-top, was watching the mother through a crack in the door. With a baby-like mentality, the little girl thought she'd copy the mother, in front of the mother.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was going somewhere, possibly on a long trip somewhere where I wouldn't be able to get anything new to read. So I either had to take one book with me or read one book really quickly before I left.

I was in a living room which was filled with natural light. I was looking at a shelf-like niche that ran across a white wall. The wall served as a bookshelf, and the bookshelf was mostly full.

I felt an urge to look to the left end of the bookshelf, almost as if a voice were calling me to do so. The voice may have been speaking about psychic phenomena. I think the voice was low and a bit gravelly, but gentle and intelligent sounding.

I saw a book that was much bigger than all the other books. All the other books were small and black, almost like binder-shaped date books. This book was tall, hardcover, with a red, cloth cover. There was gold lettering along the spine, giving the book's title, which probably had the work "Psychic" in it.

I opened the book. The man's voice was, I think, now talking about either the Book of Revelations or the end times. I thought that the book I opened must have been the Bible, and that I must have been reading a passage from the Book of Revelations.

But when I looked closer at the words, I realized I was actually reading the text from a Christian book called Renewing Your Mind, by a pastor named Marilyn Hickey. (IWL this was an important book for my family when I was a young boy.)

Dream #2

Possibly down in the canyon of a United States National Park. Probably in the parking lot for the visitor's center at the park.

I stood outside my mom's car. My mom was dropping me off here. I was going to be here for a long time. I was possibly going to work and live here.

I saw all this as if from outside my body and up in the air, at least three meters up in the air, and at varying lengths from my body -- between three meters away and fifty meters away, at the other end of the parking lot.

Good morning, everybody.

Happy holidays! The icy Dream Views logo is really fun. And the Santa Claus flying through the moon is cool, too.

Dream #1

It was night. I was either getting into or out of a car with my sister and my brother-in-law. The car was probably my sister's. It was a kind of short car, and it was packed all around by some bigger SUVs.

My sister was drunk, but she was trying to act like she wasn't. She was trying to act nice for my sake.

We now all got out of the car. The parking lot the car was in was in some downtown-like area. There was a really big, ominous-looking, tan-brick building right at the edge of the lot.

We walked out to the road, which felt very old and run-down. This place was like one of those downtowns that shut down completely at night. We were all alone here. The streetlights seemed like in a horror movie -- the light was all grainy, almost sepia-colored.

My sister was now not able to control her drunken appearance at all. She even asked, "Hey, isn't there some place we could pick up some booze?"

I knew there was a store somewhere -- maybe even just across the street and around the corner. I could even see the store, still open, like a chain drug store, its greenish fluorescent lights shining out through a window-wall in a stately, stone building.

But I figured I'd do what I could to keep us from going to that store. I think my brother-in-law felt the same way.

Somehow we decided we needed to go to the bathroom. I knew where there was a free public bathroom. We walked off to our right, toward some park-like area, then along a nice, stone walkway.

The light was just becoming blue with early morning, and there were already tourists out here -- it mostly looked like mothers and daughters.

We went to some area that looked like a fast food restaurant. It had the same color scheme as Dunkin Donuts, but with a lot more brown. And it was shaped like a wide, low public restroom in a park.

I knew that this bathroom had either been sponsored by the restaurant or was the restaurant itself. I probably thought the restaurant was McDonald's or Burger King. I think the restaurant itself was closed, but that the bathroom was always open.

I think we first walked through the restaurant's seating area, which was huge, but completely empty of people. I think we then walked through a concrete-floored, cinder-block-walled hallway that felt like it was a bridge over a road, between two buildings.

The three of us were now in the bathroom, which was a wide, concrete-floored, cinder-block-walled bathroom, like a really nice public bathroom in a park. But it may have had a Dunkin Donuts color scheme.

My sister was still drunk -- kind of wandering around randomly. But I myself was now really distracted. Eventually I decided I needed to use the bathroom. I went to a stall, so I could take a crap.

But I was having trouble closing the stall's door. It wouldn't stay closed. I was also trying to close it by twisting the little doorknob using a huge, wadded up piece of toilet paper. It was like I was afraid to touch anything in the restroom. So I was protecting my hands with toilet paper. But it was really hard to do anything with the amount of toilet paper I had in my hands.

Then, at some point, I felt some kind of erotic feeling. It related to the feeling of taking a crap. I thought I was going to do something really bad and gross in the stall. And it turned me on sexually. But I didn't want to get caught doing it.

Then a mother and daughter came into the restroom. I was kind of annoyed. I knew that if a couple of tourists were coming in, then that meant that a whole bunch of people would soon be coming into the bathroom. Everybody would know I was here, and they'd all start harrassing me. So I might as well leave now.

I might have walked back out of the stall, passed the mother and daughter, found my brother-in-law and sister, and walked back out into the long corridor.

Dream #2

It was a nice, sunny day. I was probably in the backyard of the house where my family lived while I was in high school. But the backyard was now three or four times as big as it was IWL, and it was filled with flowers. It was an incredibly huge, English-style garden! Where our garage had been, there was some big, shady kind of pagoda-like structure made of greyish, dark wood.

There were some little kids running around and playing in the garden. I thought of these kids as something like my friends or siblings. They were all angelically beautiful, like the golden-haired children of storybooks. I feel like they were all involved in some task. But I can't remember what it was.

My attention was caught by the huge, stalk-like plants near me. I couldn't put a name to them. They seem, now, to have looked like hollyhocks or foxgloves. But they weren't those flowers, either -- I'm pretty sure. They had a kind of fuzzy look. And some of them had bud-like centers: tight, green bulbs, inside a collar of thin, peach petals.

I was suddenly laying on my back. Our old dog, a cocker spaniel, was standing over me, vigorously licking, or "kissing," my lips. She was actually licking off a bunch of honey that I had on my lips.

Some voice in the distance (or in my head?), probably a child's voice, asked me either if my dog liked honey, or if my dog liked to kiss me.

Whatever the question was, I answered, "No, she's just getting the honey off my lips. She's really excited to go traveling. She loves to go places in the car. In fact, when she ----- (can't remember) -----, we'll probably get a nice car for her. Then she'll be happy to go!"

I now had an image in my head of a white, horse-drawn carriage, like a nineteenth century carriage. But the carriage was very short, proportioned, it seemed, to fit small children or dogs. And there was no top to the cabin of the carriage. It was flat and open, kind of looking like an ornate, white Radio Flyer wagon.

A man in a suit and top-hat sat in a small front area and drove the carriage. He may also have been holding a white, lace parasol.

I could see that there was a main seating area: a small square. But there was also a smaller, back rectangle, which, I now guess, could normally be used for luggage.

But I guess my dog was now dead, because she was stiff and motionless, and we had laid her in the back area, as if it were some kind of coffin for her, or a space that would have fit a coffin for her.

But I'm pretty sure the carriage wasn't taking my dog to a funeral, but to a wedding. And I may have been a part of the wedding. This was probably whatever I'd been referring to when I'd spoken to the voice. But I'm pretty sure this image didn't have anything to do with what I'd actually said.

Dream #3

I was in some kind of huge place, something like an old, French palace, mixed with a museum, mixed with an old, run-down, slummy apartment. The place was filled with all kinds of clutter -- boxes, junk, all over the place.

There were no lights on, and it was night. The only light coming into the place was extremely dim, orange light from the streetlamps outside.

There were a few other men in the structure with me. They were all in one room. The place was huge, but we were all sitting in just one room, which had a bunk bed and a computer desk in it, but which was so filled with junk that we could hardly fit ourselves into the room.

The men may have been Latino, and they may have spoken very little English. They seemed to be in their late thirties or early forties. They were short, a little overweight, and a little tough-seeming.

The men were being nice or indifferent to me. But I had a feeling that, as time wore on, they'd probably start annoying or harrassing me.

My mom now came into the room. I was happy just to have someone familiar to me in this environment. It kind of diluted the bad emotional sense I was beginning to get from these guys.

My mom looked a bit different. She was skinnier, and she had shorter hair. She sent me off to some other room. She told me that we were both getting up early tomorrow morning to take care of some task. She stressed the importance of getting up on time.

I was excited about the event. And even though it was already late, and that I wouldn't get very much sleep at all if I wanted to get up on time, I was really happy and determined to get up on time.

I lay down in bed and closed my eyes. Almost immediately, I re-opened them. I realized that I had woken up an hour late!

I ran out into the hallway to find my mom. It couldn't be true, could it? Had I overslept for the thing I was so excited for?

My mom was at the other end of the hallway. She said, "Yep, you overslept. But I wasn't going to wake you up."

I could tell my mom was disappointed in me. I felt horrible. But my mom now said something like, "Hurry up. If you just get your shit together and get out the door right now, we can still probably make it on time."

I was back in the room with the Latino men. Some of them were sleeping on the bunk bed. One was still up, sitting at the computer desk. The light was still dark. It was still very early morning, before sunrise.

I crouched before the bunkbed and began arranging something on the cuff of my right shirt sleeve for some reason. It was like I was peeling back my cuff and then twisting it back and forth. It felt like I was trying to put some kind of steel band around my wrist.

But I realized that I was just wasting my time doing this. My mom was probably out in the car, waiting for me. If I didn't hurry up, my mom would either leave me, or else she'd wait for me and we'd both be too late to make it to our task.

I stood up to get my shit together and go downstairs. But I was so unfocused. I really couldn't remember what the hell I needed to do. I didn't really know what I needed in order to get the hell out of here. And the Latino men didn't help. It was just like they were waiting for an excuse to distract me.

I now found myself in a car, an old, clunky station wagon, like the one I drove IWL when I lived out in the desert for a couple of years, working for the Park Service. The car was inside -- in one of the rooms of the house. I sat in the driver's seat. One of the Latino men stood just outside the door, looking in.

The car only had AM radio (IDL and IWL ). I had a plastic tub -- like the plastic tubs you get for various purposes during hospital stays -- filled with little, plastic knobs, each about 2cm in diameter. I had to put all of these plastic knobs onto various parts of the radio's face. Only after that would my shit be together enough so that I could leave.

But I couldn't fit all of these knobs onto the radio face! I think I managed to find ways to fit some of them onto the volume and tuning knobs. I also popped some of them onto the set-station buttons. And I may have tried to stick some onto the actual station indicator plate. But I was running out of space. And I had a ton of knobs left!

I was now by myself in a large hallway, probably inside an apartment. It was night, and the hallway was pretty dark.

I stood near the front door. The door was made of old, worn-out wood. I could feel something like a gentle wind whispering past the door. I knew it was some kind of presence. I partly thought it was a ghost. But I also thought it was some person -- or, a person coming, not a person who was actually there yet.

I knew that I was still a bit early. But as long as I kept aware of the situation, I'd see the person. Then I could meet the person just outside the apartment. I may actually have just thought of this person as only a breeze of wind.

I was now looking out through my door through a small, square window that was maybe 30cm directly above the doorknob. Looking out, I saw the dark sapphire sky of morning. I could see that out there was something like a brambly yard, which may have been something like a big, nice garden.

I was telling myself something very soothing, like the person who was coming to me was a very nice person, and that I had nothing to worry about or be afraid of.

I watched one or two people crossing my field of view. They were walking along some path, I think, that crossed between the garden and some much wider field. They were a man and a woman. A man may also later have crossed by himself.

I told myself, "See? See how nice they are? When they come for you, they'll treat you nicely. You have nothing to fear."

I was now outside. It was a bright, sunny morning. I was drifting up a very, very slight slope, on a long, wide lawn that led up to a sidewalk and an asphalt road.

I saw a man and a woman walking along the road, heading from the right to the left side of my field of view. The man and woman both looked like they were in their late thirties. But they wore clothes and had hairstyles like from the late 1970s. The man's hairstyle was particularly chunky and bowl-shaped.

The man and the woman seemed to be in a kind of peevish argument with each other. It scared me a little bit. I felt like if I got into their field of influence, they'd probably start getting all peevish and annoying with me.

But they were walking pretty quickly. And they were already away from me by the time I got up to the sidewalk.

Now that I was on the sidewalk, I noticed a few handfuls of people, all adults, walking toward a building. I realized that I was near a university campus.

The campus neighborhood reminds me now of my occasional visits to the Princeton campus. But the university building, which I saw off to my left, looked more like an elementary school mixed with a modern, suburban church building.

All the people walking toward the building seemed to be in their thirties and forties. There were men and women. Sometimes people were in groups, talking with each other. Other times they were walking alone.

Some of the people wore suits or formal attire. Others were wearing caps and gowns, like they were attending a graduation ceremony.

I also noticed that a lot of the women had very masculine faces. Some of the women were definitely women, just with very hard, squarish faces. But some of the people dressed as women may have been men.

As I got to the actual building, I realized that it was more like an elementary school. The adults I'd seen funnelling toward this area were actually teachers. They were all now dispersing toward different parts of the building: to their classrooms, I assumed.

I was in a square, concrete-floored courtyard of the building. There were a lot of kids running all about, rushing, I supposed, to get to their classes.

There were some adult women posted here and there, apparently to make sure that nobody was getting out of hand. I figured I'd ask one of these women either where I was, or where I was supposed to be. I didn't really know the answer to either of those questions.

I saw a woman posted just under the covering of the building, at the back, right corner of the courtyard. I figured I'd approach her and ask her what I was here for.

As I walked toward that woman, a girl wearing a pale pink sweater ran through the courtyard with a clear, plastic bottle of water.

One of the other women admonished the girl for some reason or another. The girl thought she was being really grown-up and helpful for doing something. But she was also using her task to avoid having to do some thing that all the girls her age needed to do. She knew this. So when the teacher admonished her, she listened.

But as I was about to reach the woman, some kind of alarm went off. The alarm was the prayer bell. Wherever you were, whatever you were doing, when the prayer bell went off, you had to stop, crouch down on your knees, bow your head to the ground, and start praying to god.

The ritual seems to me now to be Islam-influenced. But the prayer was more like a Christian prayer mixed with something like the United States Pledge of Allegiance.

I bowed, too, because I at least knew what all this meant. I was near a stairwell. A girl wearing a Muslim-style head-covering bowed near me.

As I looked at the floor, I noticed it was tiled in meter-square tiles looking like flecked granite. But this tile was all chipped away in a corner, so that almost a quarter of the tile was chipped into an oily blackness.

During the prayer-pledge, the girl in the pale pink shirt ran out of the doorway of a classroom near me. She had the water bottle again, and she was about to rush off somewhere. But the woman I was trying to approach told the girl to kneel down and pray, like everybody else.

The girl said something like, "Oh, yeah. Right." She didn't kneel down, though. She just sat, in some kind of athletic pose, with her back to the wall, and waited for the prayer to finish.

Something about the girl's face made me think she might have Down's Syndrome. But the girl was really smart and active. I liked her a lot.

When I got up from the prayer-pledge, I approached the adult woman. I had a feeling now that I was here for some kind of volunteer project with New York Cares. So I asked the woman if she knew where we volunteers were meeting. The woman pointed to the stairwell behind me and said that New York Cares was meeting up on the second floor.

But before I could go upstairs, a little girl grabbed my hand and told me to help her with her spelling. She dragged me over to something that looked like folding gym mats stood up on one side and w-folded, to look like a gym-mat version of Chinese screens.

Before the Chinese screen was a long, school-like table that was only 25cm or so above the ground. Both the little girl and I had to kneel to sit at the table. The table had a long sheet of paper across it. The paper was filled with items like multiple choice questions.

For each number, there may possibly have been questions, probably ridiculously inane questions, like, "How do you spell -----?" as if a kid wouldn't know how to spell a word he was looking right at. But there were no answers in the multiple choice spaces. It was just A, B, C, D, with no answers beside the letters!

I think what the little girl actually had to do was choose the correct letter, A, B, C, or D, and then correctly spell the word in the space beside that letter. I think the little girl may actually have explained this to me herself.

The little girl was probably learning impaired. But she seemed really smart, as well. She seemed to be doing well enough spelling for herself. And maybe she just wanted me around for the heck of it while she was doing her work.

But every once in a while I'd have to help her with spelling. At some point, I even chose, and circled?, the letter "C" on one of her questions. I also remember something about one of us writing in cursive.

Then the little girl's brother came up. He was also, apparently, learning impaired, though not as much as his sister. He may have been a bit younger than the girl. He was climbing all over both me and the little girl, though he mostly seemed to be climbing all over me. He really wanted my attention, and he wanted to prove, I think, that he was smarter than his sister.

At some point I stood up, as if my lessons for the little girl and boy were over. I told them they'd both done a good job.

But the boy wanted to see my cell phone for some reason. I was pretty sure that that was not a good idea, because I think I'd been looking on some sort of fetish website before I'd come here. The boy didn't need to be seeing any of that kind of stuff.

I then saw my phones screen, as if it were flickering on, like a TV would, with a bit of vertical hold striping a black screen, as the TV is getting started up and getting a hold of itself. The striping was yellow -- so it seemed to me that this was "effect" for a production, not real vertical hold striping.

There was then, probably, some kind of video, maybe starring Hyde from the j-pop band L'Arc en Ciel. But I can't remember anything about it.

Good morning, everybody.

Ugh! I let my dumb weekend chores spiral out of control. So I'm not making this entry until now!

Just as a note, the second dream was the closest thing to a nightmare that I've had in a long time. It wasn't very different from many of my other dreams. But, for some reason, it upset me a lot. I could hear myself screaming in the dream. I may actually have woken up screaming.

Dream #1

I was heading into the lobby of either an apartment building or a hotel. I had just moved out of my old place and into this new place. The lobby was really wide, but with a low ceiling and a kind of old, worn-out look. There was a little front-desk-type area at the back, right corner of the lobby.

I headed toward a small room on the left wall, near the front of the lobby. It was the mail room. There were a lot of aluminum mailboxes along the wall on my right side. But a lot of the mailboxes were busted open. Someone had broken into the mailboxes.

I was arfraid for my own mail. My mailbox may have been open. I had some mail in my box. But it did seem like something was missing.

I looked at my mail as I walked out of the room. One piece of mail was for some other apartment. The other piece may have been a door tag from FedEx, like what they leave on a door when they come to deliver a package, but the person isn't hme.

I thought I would either give the piece of wrongly delivered mail directly to the person it belonged to, or else give it to the person at the front desk. But I was kind of afraid to let anybody know that the mailboxes had been broken into. I didn't want the people who'd broken into them to cme after me.

For some reason I was getting ready to leave the apartment. A FedEx man was coming in at the same time. But instead of asking him about my package, I told him that someone had broken into the mailboxes.

Dream #2

A documentary about the effects of some sort of nuclear accident, probably in Russia, though I'm pretty sure it wasn't Chernobyl. The documentary was following the lives of people in a small town near the accident.

The people had all been exposed to radiation. But they hadn't been moved away from the area where they'd been exposed. Most of the people seemed to be women.

There was one woman in a bedroom that kind of looked like a hostpital room. The woman was by herself, with her baby, in the room. But the room had multiple beds (or low cots), some of which could be separated from each other by dark blue curtains.

The woman was walking back and forth with her baby cradled to her chest by means of some kind of blanket. The woman wore a dark green t-shirt and may have been pushed up above the navel of the woman's taut belly.

A narrator may have said something about how the woman was really ill from the effects of the radiation. Now the woman was laying in one of the low cots, holidng her baby close to her. The baby may then have changed into a three- or four-year-old girl. The girl may have been tending to the mother.

The view now closed up on the woman's right arm, which was loosely hanging off the edge of the bed. A nurse administered some kind of injection into the woman's arm.

But either the woman was so sick that her body couldn't take any more medicine, or else the injection had been administered wrongly, and now the woman's body was rejecting it. The woman's vein swelled into a square about 3 cm per side. Then the woman's heart stopped beating.

I couldn't believe the woman had just died! I was now in the room. I don't know where the daughter was. I don't know where the nurse was. I thought I was myself, by myself.

I was panicking. I didn't know what to do about the dead woman. I still didn't want to believe she was dead. I thought if I found somebody, they might be able to save her.

So I used my cell phone and called somebody who I thought could help. I was now out in what I thought was the lobby for a small, narrow apartment complex.

I got a hold of the person, probably a man. Suddenly I had to admit to myself that the woman was dead, and that that was what I was going to have to explain to the person. As I started talking to the person, I looked at myself in the mirror.

I was a woman, maybe in her mid- to late-twenties. I was either white or Latina. My skin was pale. I had kind of sharp, almost squarish features. I wore some kind of pale, powdery foundation, and my eyebrows seemed to be pencilled in. I also had my hair in tight braids, which seemed almost like dredds, except with a bunch of tiny tangles coming off of them.

I then walked toward either a blank wall or a white wall with a plain, white door on it. As I did this, I told the man I was speaking to that I had been the one to administer the shot to the dead woman.

When I suddenly realized or admitted that I had been the one that had killed the woman, I broke down. I was crying. But my voice was more of a terrified moan, which eventually became a low-pitched, loud scream.

Dream #3

I was in "my bedroom," which almost had the shape of my bedroom, but which was almost empty. There were some boxes along the back wall, near the left corner. But I noticed they had been pushed from the wall.

I was afraid that somebody had been in my room. BUt I was more worried about putting the boxes back into alignment.

When I looked closer, I noticed that what had probably pushed them out of the way was some really heavy box that had managed to slump over toward the wall in such a way that it wedged in between the other boxes and the wall, pushing the other boxes aside as it slid along the wall, down toward the floor.

I picked up the heavy box. It was apparently a Christmas package I'd received. I figured I'd just need to open the package now and put the contents wherever they belonged in the house, so that the box would stop interfering with the order of my other boxes.

I opened the package. A wine bottle was inside. I pulled it out. The green bottle was encased in a white, plastic square, and it had a white, plastic, pull-off top.

I must have done something with the bottle. But now I was standing near the front wall of my room. The lights had been on before. But now they were off. The only light in the room was coming from my hallway or bathroom.

I was looking at my room, proud of how clean and spacious it looked, now that I'd organized things so well. But I now noticed that I had a cluttered pile laying a meter or so away from my back and right walll. The pile was mostly clothes, though there may also have been a blanket or beanbag chair.

I sighed, annoyed that I'd have to clean this stuff up before I could truly think I had a clean room. I lifted up a maroon, button-up shirt made out of some flannel-like material. I folded it. I folded another piece of clothing. I eventually worried that someone, somehow, might discover that I also had female clothing in this pile.

Dream #4

One of the very first episodes of the TV show Full House. Almost everybody in the cast was different.

The house itself also looked a lot different, like a mix between the house in Growing Pains and the house in Family Ties. There was a staircase on the left side of the room, near the front door. At the foot of the staircase was a big piano.

The dad and Uncle Jesse had kind of secretly worked to buy a doll for the middle daughter of the family. (Uncle Jesse may have been John Stamos, but the dad wasn't Bob Saget.) The two men wanted to make up for something really aggravating that had happened to the girl, and had probably been their fault.

So the two men left the doll sitting on top of the piano. The room was now empty, though I had an image in my mind's eye of the older daughter, who was the same person as in the regular show, except that she had really straight hair and wore eyeglasses.

The middle daughter now walked into the house. She was different from the daughter in the regular cast. She saw the baby doll laying on the piano top. Surprised, she rushed to the doll and picked it up. She walked up the stairs with it.

The doll wore no clothes, probably had a white, cloth body, and plastic limbs, and was either bald or had plastic "hair" molded onto her head.

Somehow this plain old cloth and plastic doll managed to pee. She just let out a huge gush of water, getting the daughter's front all wet.

The daughter's appearance had changed. She now looked like a "rebel girl" or "skater girl" kind of TV show character. She cried out, "Oh, god! You peed all over me!"

The daughter needed to clean herself off. But now the whole scene started over again. But everything that had already happened was still remembered by the characters.

The doll was placed, by an unseen erson, on the piano top. For a moment, the camera view closed in really tight on the doll, who seemed to be surrounded by a tiny square of little, wooden bars, almost like a mini, doll-sized railing that had been built onto the piano top.

The daughter ran in and picked it up, this time without any surprise or excitement. The daughter may also still have needed to clean the pee off herself.

But now the daughter, walking up the stairs, started saying things to the doll like, "Oh, yeah! I really like you! You're really sexy!"

I wondered why this girl would find a doll so sexy, and I wanted to see more, to see howthis relationship would develop between the girl and the baby doll that she found sexy.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was out on a stage, just a little bit to the right (my right) of the stage. Back and to my left, the playwright George Bernard Shaw lay in a hospital bed. He was really sick, but he was giving a lecture. I was here either to introduce him or kind of interview him. His voice was really faint and weak.

Now I was leaving the theatre through some backstage area and a backstage door. I was walking through some kind of brick-walled alley. It was daytime.

Suddenly I realized or heard that Shaw was about to die. He knew he was going to die. He had announced that his next lecture would be his last. But that lecture would be today. In fact, it was starting right now! And I had left the theatre!

I had to see Shaw's last lecture. He was my favorite playwright. And I had the feeling Shaw would die immediately or soon after he got off stage. So I had to be there.

I ran back in the door, through the backstage area, and through a small door that led directly onto the stage. The show had just started. A woman had introduced Shaw. Shaw now sat in a nice chair on a green rug. A nice table with a lamp may have stood near the chair. Shaw had just started giving a little speech.

I at first wanted to sit near Shaw on the stage. But since I came in late I didn't feel I deserved to. So I sat off to the right of the stage. In the shadows were some bleachers, which were pretty well filled with people. I sat on the floor on the bleachers, where I thought I would be in view of Shaw, so he'd at least know I'd attended.

The woman asked Shaw some question about religion. Shaw responded a little ramblingly. He then said, "And, yes, I've been in a coven. I've headed a coven."

A little, black boy in a black hooded sweatshirt with thin, widely-spaced, white stripes and sitting in a wooden chair a couple meters to the right of and behind the woman raised his hand.

Shaw pointed to the boy, as if to take his question. He said, "Yes, you. And what's your name, little boy?"

The boy stood up. His face couldn't be seen. He may have been turned around, or he may have had his hoodie on backwards, with the hood pulled up over his face. He said, "Some people call me Lazarus. But you can think of me as Nicodemus."

The boy may have started knocking himself on the top of his head with his right fist.

Dream #2

I was in some room like a school cafeteria. The floors and walls were all white, and there may have been a set of white folding chairs all arranged in a grid, like for a meeting.

But whatever had been going on here was finished, and everybody was leaving. Apparently we'd had a meeting regarding the production of some movie. It wasn't certain the movie was going to be made. But people were feeling a lot more confident that it would.

The leaders of the effort all stood up front, near some long folding tables. There were a few long, plastic coolers. The leaders were kind of clowning around with each other while they packed up their supplies for the day. The leaders all looked South Asian. One of the leaders looked like the Malaysian singer MonoLoQue.

The leaders may actually have been making up some wacky, funny song based on the song they thought would be the theme song for the movie. I tried to join in, but I don't think I was very funny. The leaders were patient with me. But I got the feeling they thought I was being too much of a groupie. So I decided to leave.

I walked down a stairwell in the center of the floor. But as I got halfway down I realized I'd forgotten something upstairs. I ran back up to get it. But I didn't really know what I was doing upstairs and I didn't want the leaders to see me again. So I went back down the stairwell.

About halfway down the stairwell, I realized I had to go back to my apartment before I went anywhere. But my apartment was right near the stairwell. In fact, just in front of the stairwell, right where I stood, was a window to my room. (Off to my left may have been some area like a department store.)

So I swung myself up and bashed through a wooden panel blocking the window to my bedroom. Right before I'd done this I'd seen a tallish, kind of overweight, white man in a red t-shirt and blue jeans walking along some balcony between flights of steps behind me, as if I were now in some kind of apartment building's stairwell.

I broke through my window and rolled onto my bed, then onto the floor. The window seemed to have been open. But I noticed that I'd broken the board, a white-painted board about 33cm high and 1 meter wide, in half.

As I landed on the floor, I heard a woman in the living room go get the door. Oh, I thought to myself, that woman must be my new roommate.

The woman opened the door to the man I'd seen in the stairwell. (I don't know how I knew this, since I didn't see it.) As soon as the woman let the man into the apartment, she yelled, "No! I'm not doing it! I told you I didn't want to be a part of it anymore and I didn't want to see you anymore!"

I thought I should go out into the living room and defend my new roommate. But I was afraid. So I just sat and listened.

The man had apparently been trying to get the woman to be in a movie for a production house he'd just started up. But already the production house was having trouble with censors. The man said, "And this is a movie that, just because you got a few people saying certain cuss words, people wanna make it rated X!"

But the woman had left the man just because he had kept putting her in porn movies. She was yelling at him that she could tell he was getting started going down the same old path, and that she didn't want to be a part of it again. She seemed either to be walking the man to the door or heading out with him.

I sat on my bed and looked at the broken board in my hands. It sounded quiet. Maybe the man was gone, I thought, and I could go introduce myself to the woman. But I was wondering what kind of first impression I'd make with her, suddenly having appeared in my bedroom, and having broken the board on my window. The woman might think I was crazy!

Dream #3

I was sitting in a car with a woman who looked exactly like my mom but was something more like an interviewer or psychiatrist. I sat on the passenger side, and the woman sat on the driver's side. It was daytime. We were parked at the far end of a long driveway in front of a house.

I told the woman, "About the time that my cousin and I were trying to figure out what to do for college --"

The woman interrupted me. "What do you mean? I thought that before, you'd said that your cousin didn't start college until a couple years after you did. How could he be going to college at the same time as you? It doesn't make sense!"

I said, "That's not what I mean. What I said just now was --"

Suddenly something happened, and I knew I had to leave the car and get going somewhere else. My car door had been open all this time. I stood up and walked off to my right. I walked along a stretch of dirt on the shoulder of a road.

As I approached a fence, an adult woman came walking toward, then past me with a bunch of little girls. It was like a school group. Most of the girls were five years old or younger. They were all wearing diapers: some only diapers, some diapers with dresses over them. I was sexually attracted to these little girls.

But there was one little girl, an Asian girl who seemed to be maybe seven or eight years old. She had jaw-length, black hair and was wearing a white dress with thin fabric. It appeared that this girl was also wearing a diaper, though I couldn't tell for sure. I was extremely attracted to this girl.

I passed the fence, and one more adult woman walked along past me, following one last little girl wearing only a diaper. But for some reason, I found myself so sexually attracted to the little Asian girl that I felt like I had to follow her, at least to find out if she really was wearing diapers.

I turned around and headed for the little girls, none of whom I could see now. I knew if I caught up with them and started trying to get close to the little Asian girl I'd certainly be singled out as a pervert. So I was trying to think up excuses for heading back and being near the girls.

I thought that the little girls must have been going to the car to see the woman. Now I was in the car with the woman. She started up the car as I started talking to her. We pulled out of the driveway and drove away.

I told the woman, "You see, my cousin and I were in the same year of school. And we were best friends. So when we got into our Junior year, we both started thinking together about what colleges we'd go to."

The woman had turned right around a corner and was now driving through an alley going past the backyards of houses.

I continued. "But my cousin ended up getting sidetracked. So he didn't go to school right away. He had a terrible childhood! I'd go over there all the time to see him."

The woman now turned right and pulled into the driveway in the backyard of some house like my great grandma's old house.

I continued, "My cousin would be grounded for, like, six months at a time! And he'd just have to sit in his bedroom in the basement for the whole time. Sometimes he'd even have to write thousands of sentences."

I had to leave again. I opened the car door. There were some little girls walking around in diapers in the driveway. I was kind of attracted to them.

As I stood up and turned right, to walk away past the back of the car, I saw that my sister was leaning against the car, almost right in the doorway! She said, "Hey," in a kind of guyish voice.

I hoped my sister hadn't seen me ogling the little girls. But I looked at my sister. She was skinny, in shape, and she wore a blue-sleeved, white t-shirt that really showed off her boobs. I suddenly realized my sister was really attractive!

Dream #4

I walked into a museum with my mom. The lobby was dim and narrow. The ticket counter was some kind of polished, black stone.

We walked up to the ticket person. I was a member at the museum, and the ticket person knew me. But he might not have seen me. My mom handed the man my membership card and said something like, "He's a member."

The man said, "Great," and was about to print a ticket for my mom.

But my mom said, "I'd like three people, and also two children, please."

The man seemed a bit taken aback by my mom asking for so many tickets. I was taken aback, too! I thought I was coming to the museum with just my mom. Who were all these other people coming with us?

I said something to the man. He finally noticed me. He said, "Oh! But you're a member *here*. Why are you trying to get in with this card? This is a MoMA card."

I saw the card in the man's hand and realized he was right. Hoping to avoid him getting suspicious of me -- like he might have thought I was trying to hide the fact that I'd let my membership expire -- I flipped quickly through my wallet, trying to find the right membership card.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

It was night. I walked out (from where) onto the peak of a big hill or mountain. The peak of the mountain was kind of thin and knobby. It seemed to be made of a pink stone like sandstone. There were little stretches of green vegetation like moss or short grass. Below the peak, the mountain seemed to wind around in spires and caverns. There were even a few waterfalls. The air was very calm and cool.

There were a few groups of people on the mountain, doing different things. There was a group of policemen sitting near the peak of the mountain. I sat near them. I looked down the mountain and saw a group of skateboarders skating down a sandstone ramp.

The police may have been talking about some job they were on. They may have been looking for some woman for some reason or another.

The skateboarders had all gone to the bottom of the ramp, possibly together. Now they all came back up together. I was kind of wondering if it was okay to be skating out in a natural area like this. But the kids were getting ready to skate again. So I figured I'd watch.

A black boy, kind of tall, maybe in his late teens, skated down part of the ramp. But he ended up going down a side ramp off to his right. The ramp sloped upward, over the edge of the moutain. The boy lifted up into the air and then disappeared off the cliff. There was no sound of his crashing, although the boy may have made a little sound of surprise as he went off the cliff.

I kind of waited for a second. It seemed like everybody, including the cops, had seen the young man flying off the cliff. But the police didn't seem to care. They just kept talking about this job of looking for a woman.

Finally I told the police that they probably should look for this boy. He obviously just fell off a cliff, and he was in danger. I even bent over, while still sitting, to get a view down the mountain through some kind of hole made in the sandstone. I saw the boy below, lying face down on a ledge of sandstone.

It was pretty obvious the boy was dead, and I told the police so. They grunted a bit and stood up reluctantly, saying they'd go check things out. In the meantime, however, I was apparently charged with the task of finding the woman.

I walked down one of the sandstone slopes. But then I was suddenly in a house. I was in an area like a living room. It was really wide, but it also felt short somehow. There were a lot of windows and sliding glass doors. It was night, and the house felt lit, but not completely.

I had to search along all the walls, even feeling along the walls and down at the corners where the walls met the floors. The woman was apparently in a small space like this. All this time I was either having a conversation with myself in my head or hearing or remembering hearing the police talking, probably about the woman.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was on the Brooklyn Bridge with my mother. The walkway of the bridge felt a lot different. It was like all the suspension cables were packed tightly together, and as if there were layers and layers of them. The cables seemed to run incredibly high up into the air. And the bridge itself seemed much bigger and taller than it is IWL.

I was standing out on some metal beam over the walkway with my mom. I may have been holding on to some of the suspension cables for balance.

I was telling my mom some dream I had. In the dream I stood out on some beach, possibly bordering a jungle. One of my co-workers, DD, was there. He had been followinf me around, snooping into my business.

Then, in this dream, a flood had come. It managed to wash me up onto a railroad freight car that was itself filled with debris. I stood on the debris, but it also sometimes felt like the freight car had a solid, red roof on it, and that I stood on that.

I was carrying something like notebooks and textbooks. I was actually in this place to begin with, I now understood, so I could study this stuff. There may actually have been a school desk in the distance, now littered with debris, which I had possibly been using for studying.

DD was now running all over the place, trying to find out where I'd gone. He was really intent on snooping on me for some reason. But I kept quiet and just got to my studying again.

I might not have spoken this dream to my mom. I may have thought it while she read my thoughts. As the dream ended, I may have gotten distracted and tried to tell her the dream again. I may not have known whether I had actually finished telling the dream. But at some point I felt like I was done telling my mom the dream.

For some reason I now climbed through the multi-layered lattice of the steel suspension cables. As I did, my mom asked me, through voice or thought, whether the people publishing me dreams were paying me a lot of money. I said no, that the newspaper (or periodical) I wrote my dreams in took my dreams for free.

I climbed down along a section of suspension cables that was like a ladder. It wasn't until I had started climbing down this ladder that I had felt any fear of heights. The bridge was so tall!

I was now back down on the wooden walkway of the bridge. My mom was already down there, but she was now an old man. She walked behind me as we walked on the outside of the fence guarding the walkway. We were on the edges of the wooden slats now, possibly heading back out to climb on the suspension cables.

The old man started talking about his life as a reporter, back in the old days. He said that in those days reporters really dug into a story. Nowadays, the old man said, reporting was shallow and lazy. I felt bad about what the old man was saying, as if I could have done something to prevent this.

Dream #2

I was in a living room which was positioned in the house like a bedroom. A few people had been in the room. They were all nice-looking and young.

Among these people was a Latina woman who had been recognized as a spy. The woman had been fatally injured or had been made to take poison.

Everybody else was now gone except for the woman and I. I may not have been "there," but just seeing the room. The woman lay on the couch on her back, her head and shoulders kind of slumping off the front of the couch. She was still alive and she may have said something.

I now had a view of another or the same woman. She was standing over me, as if I were a child. My view came up to just under her breasts. She wore a tight t-shirt and a dark blue hoodie. She was in trouble. She had possibly just been shot, or else she was possibly about to be shot.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was in a house like my great-grandmother's house. Other family members were there. We were all getting ready for a wedding, which was probably going to take place in the living room.

I walked out from the kitchen into the living room. Right where my great-grandmother's chair would have been, there was a bed. Two or three people were in the bed. These were the people who were going to get married.

The people had a weird look, like they were frozen or made out of wax. They had strained, sinewy looks on their faces, like old paintings of people in sorrow and pain. They looked like they were near death. One of them seemed to be wearing ancient robes and a head-covering, like women in Renaissance paintings. The robes, and possibly even the person, seemed to be colored a pale pink.

I think that the scene of the bed made so little sense to me that I actually looked away from it. I couldn't understand how a marriage could be so morbid.

Other family members were seated in different parts in the room, each group spaced well apart from the other. The family members remarked that there was one person missing from the bed -- the woman who was actually to be the bride.

The family members all remarked that the woman was so sensitive about having her picture taken in these situations that she'd avoided this scene altogether. Everybody kind of felt bad for setting up this situation, even though it seemed to be the usual part of a wedding. But everybody kind of looked up to this girl, so they hated doing anything that made her uncomfortable.

I saw the girl in my head. She looked kind of young, maybe in her late teens or early twenties. She was skinny, kind of pale, and blonde, with her hair in a pony tail. She wore tight blue jeans and a white t-shirt which she had tucked into her pants, but which was also a little baggy around her tiny waist.

Dream #2

I was in a small bedroom, like a bedroom for a little kid, with my boss. We both sat on the floor, cross-legged. I sat before a bunk bed. My boss sat near the door.

I had a big, white, cotton bag of laundy in front of me. Inside the bag was a bunch of laundry and two packs of diapers. One pack was pink, and one pack was blue.

I was going through the bag, shuffling through all the clothing, which may actually have been dirty. I may have been trying to pull some stuff together for some kind of business trip that I was going to take with my boss.

My boss started telling me about his old job, which actually had something to do with the packs of diapers in the laundry bag. He had done something like design the diapers or been among the first sales team to promote them, or something.

Apparently the diapers were made for newborns or very young babies. There was some other sort of stuff related to the diapers -- clear, plastic items like tubing and masks (?).

I pretended to be pulling different items of clothing out of the bag. But I was actually more focused on pulling the diapers and the plastic items out of the bag. I wanted to wear the diapers from the pink pack. I think I assumed that the plastic gear helped you fit into the diapers (?).

I hoped my boss didn't catch on that I was going to try and wear these newborn girls' diapers. But eventually my boss stopped talking about his old job. He got impatient that I was taking so long finding clothes for the business trip. He said, "I'll be waiting outside, whenever you finally have everything all ready to go."

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was in a new deli, which may have been downstairs from my apartment. The deli was still under construction. There were all kinds of things being unpacked.

The place had a blue-green kind of feel, as if the walls had been painted a pale blue-green. There were rolls of paper unrolled on the floor. Counters were set out in random fashion, as if they hadn't been fastened to their permanent positions yet.

There were a couple soda refrigerators with their doors open. One was on the back wall, in front of me. The other was on the wall to my left. They were both tall and narrow. The refrigerators were so cold that I could feel the cold coming from them.

The coolers were so cold that the sodas (or bottled waters?) inside the coolers had been frozen. I figured this level of coldness was natural, since the store wasn't opened yet, so that the coolers weren't tuned to a normal level.

There were a few people running around in the store, getting things ready. I saw at least one woman and one man. They were both Mexican. They were talking back and forth and joking with each other in English or in Spanish and English.

I knew that the place wasn't open yet, and I felt like I shouldn't be here. But, for some reason, I felt really comfortable here. I figured I'd grab some stuff and then head back up to my apartment.

It suddenly struck me that, now that there was a new deli below my house, it would be a lot easier for me to come downstairs and grab some frozen pizza. I thought I would suddenly be eating a lot more frozen pizza than I'd been eating in a long time.

Dream #2

There was some kind of television show or some kind of stage performance about adult women who had romantic relationships with young girls.

The stage and background were white. The stage may have been clean and polished, so that it was slightly reflective.

The women and the girls wore spandex suits with blue, pink and purple flower designs on them. They also wore something like flowing, white blouses that went up over their heads to become something like hoods, leaving a circle open for their faces. The hoods may have been topped with flat circles, which were slightly tilted.

The women and young girls were doing a slow dance, in groups but kind of solo, where they would elevate and point forward their legs and arms slightly.

Dream #3

There was some kind of narration about my mother's life. There was talk about how my mother had had such a tough time because she had been a single mother. There may also have been talk about how my mother had been really upset when my father had left her.

There was now a view of a car like a station wagon driving up a steep, mountain road. The road didn't criss-cross or spiral up the mountain: it just went straight up the steep slope. As the car drove, the narrator spoke about how my mother worked through a lot of emotional difficulties and survived to this point in life.

Listening to this narration made me really sad for my mom. But it also made me kind of proud of her. I felt I had seen this road somewhere. It occurred to me that I might have seen the road in a dream. The surreal steepness of the road and the way the car seemed to be reaching extreme heights on this mountain all reminded me of some tall mountain dream I'd had in the past.

I was now in the backseat of the car. My mom was driving. We had approached some place halfway up the mountain. We pulled into an asphalt parking area.

My mom, and possibly one of my family members, maybe my sister, was talking about how lucky we were. Some of our more removed family members, my mom said, had died in pretty terrible situations. They had died all alone, sometimes in shameful ways. The closer family members of those people had had to deal with the ghastly emotional impact of those situations.

But, my mom said, the closer members of our family who had died had died rather peacefully, with loving families around them. And, right now, all our family members were in situations where, even were they to die suddenly and unexpectedly, they would at least die in a position where they were somewhat comfortable and they knew their family loved them.

I either thought to myself or said out loud that that wasn't true. I thought about two of my cousins, P and B. P is a man and B is a woman.

I thought that both P and B were in situations where, if they died, they'd be all alone. At least one of them was actually in an extremely dangerous situation, though in my dream I couldn't remember where either cousin was.

I was now out on a river bank with my family. I suddenly realized that my cousin B wasn't far away at all. She was actually in this forest. She was kayaking through this river.

In my mind's eye I saw further down river, to a wide stretch that was shaded pleasantly by tall pine trees. Where we were, the banks were open and lawny, with jagged rocks for the river's banks.

Maybe all my immediate family members were out on this bank. We had a couple of kayaks nearby. We must have been getting ready to go kayaking, although for some reason, I seemed to feel like I was thinking of suggesting the idea of kayaking to my family, as if it hadn't yet occurred to anybody to go kayaking yet.

I thought of dipping one of the kayaks into the water, but the water (which was actually only moderately fast) seemed way to rough and the rocks way too jagged for the kayak to handle.

I turned around and saw at least one of my nephews, the oldest nephew, getting dressed in an orange life jacket. I felt like everybody was getting dressed in life jackets, as if they were all getting ready to go kayaking. I thought this was great, and I offered my own life jacket to one of my nephews, since I knew they liked wearing my stuff (???).

One of my nephews, maybe the oldest, said he'd take my life jacket. But suddenly I realized I'd left it somewhere else. It was like I'd left it in the car. But it was also like I'd left it somewhere very far away. I said I'd have to go get it. I hoped I could get it fast enough so that it wouldn't cause a delay.

I suddenly realized that I had also left the life jacket in water somewhere. The life jacket had been in the water so long that it was now beginning to dissolve. I hoped I could pull the jacket out of the water before it dissolved entirely.

In my mind's eye I saw the life jacket. It was white, instead of orange, but it had orange flower designs on it.

Dream #4

I was walking through a park. It was a clear day, pretty warm. The sun seemed to be going down. The sky was dim, and the light was partly golden and partly cool and dim.

I walked along a concrete path in a somewhat narrow curve of the park. There was deep, green lawn on either side of the path. There were a few people in the park, just relaxing. I think everybody in the park was black.

The sound of my breathing slowly became more and more audible. Suddenly it seemed to me like my breath was like the breathing sound of somebody in a space suit, like in the movie 2001. I wondered why my breathing would sound like this.

It suddenly occurred to me that the reason my breathing sounded like this was because I wasn't exactly in a park. I was in a different kind of place altogether. The only time I could think of when I was in a place like this was in my dreams.

I realized I was dreaming. There wasn't a tremendous improvement to the clarity or sensation of the dream, like there usually is when I become lucid. But I was suddenly a lot more aware of the environment.

I smiled at a few people. I was happy to be aware, and I wanted to share my happiness somehow.

I walked into a wider area of the park. Since there were a decent number of people around, and they all seemed to be peaceful and happy, I figured I'd try to talk with some of them, just to see what things were all about here.

There were a couple of boys playing (with a set of blocks or other toys set up to look like a castle?) half on the concrete path and half on the grass. The boy on the path had his back turned to me.

I smiled and addressed the boy in some way to get his attention. The boy turned his face toward me. He looked a lot older than he actually was. Something about this threw me off balance. I looked quickly at the boy and walked on down the path.

I tried not to let the boy's surprising appearance throw me off balance. I tried to continue acting cheerful. I figured if I could keep the cheerful attitude I'd had as I'd become I could stay lucid. But I could already feel that I was dropping out of lucidity.

I could see that I was approaching something like a brick-and-concrete, arched gate that served as an entrance to the park.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was either with a group of people or watching them as if watching like a disembodied viewer. The people were in some kind of store like an old deli, which also felt like an old trading post. The people were mostly men, maybe older men. They surrounded a younger man.

The younger man was pale white. He wore a 1970s style suit with a blue jacket, white shirt, and tie. He had long, frizzy hair which was balding away from his forehead. He had pale, blue eyes, a kind of nubby nose, and a mustache. He may have had pimples or boils on his face.

The man had either been involved in some crime or had witnessed some crime. Now the men were trying either to get the man to give them whatever he had gotten from the crime or to refrain from telling the police about the crime. But the man wouldn't cooperate. I got the feeling that, right or wrong, the guy was kind of sleazy or cocky.

The men did something to the man, possibly beating him up somehow. They then poured some kind of liquid like gasoline down his throat. After this they may have lit a match around him.

The man was dead. The men were now just outside the store. But the outside of the store was like a log cabin in the woods. Something about the event was repeating itself inside, as if the man were dying all over again.

The leader of this group of people was now a black woman with short, reddish-blonde hair. The woman now stood before the men, outside. She asked them if everything had been taken care of. The men said yes. They had even laid the man's body on her bed, as she'd asked.

I now saw the woman's bed, as if the woman's bedroom were just upstairs from the deli/trading post. The body of a tall, muscular, black man lay on the left side of the bed. The body may have been naked or clad only in white underwear.

I now understood that the woman's husband had died. The woman was going to use this dead body to get in touch with her husband somehow. Possibly she was just going to lay on the bed and talk to the dead body as if it were her husband. But possibly the husband was actually going to possess the body.

A little story played out in my head where the woman lay down to talk to the body. The body became possessed, surprising the woman. The body spoke, but it couldn't move. The woman may have decided to have sex with the body.

Dream #2

I saw the top of my head somehow. I saw some rather long and stringy pieces of dandruff in my hair. I was kind of grossed out. I searched through my hair, trying to figure out how much of this big dandruff I had.

I saw, then, that parts of my hair had actually been stapled to my head. It was done in tiny bands, like braids on a small girl's head. I thought that I had gotten my hair stapled to my head the last time I'd gotten my hair cut. That had been two months ago -- too long, I thought. By now, the staples would be grown into my head. When the haircut people went to take them out, it would really hurt.

Dream #3

I was looking through an Ikea catalog for stuff for my house. I may have gotten a bunch of stuff already. But now I thought I'd need a bed, too. But I was reluctant to get a bed. They cost so much, and I'd already spent so much.

So I looked through a few different kinds of alternative beds, which were cheaper. One was just some blue mattress. Others were tiny, baby-sized mattresses, which I may have taken for cribs.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was with my family in a dark house. There seemed to be a lot of us, more than my extended family. We were all crowded around the television
The rest of the living room was crammed with boxes.

I was in town, visiting my family. Today was my last day in town.

My mom was behind us, in the kitchen. She told me that she had just called my aunt, and that my aunt would be coming over soon. I got mad at my mom. She and my aunt always has conflicts. I wondered why my mom would invite such conflict on my last day in town. I really didn't want to see my aunt.

My mom got upset and started crying asking didn't I know she was just trying to make it so I could see everybody I loved? I now felt really bad and figured I could deal with seeing my aunt.

Dream #2

I was with a man and a woman, walking through a place that looked like the lobby of a hotel. The man and I were carrying big plates of mirrors as big as windowpanes. The T three of us were here to visit a dying woman. We headed for an elevator. The woman by insisted on carrying the mirror I held. She felt like she hadn't been c doing enough. So I let her carry it.

We went into an elevator. The woman had laid down the mirror, which was now only about knee-high. We got up to the second floor, or the mezzanine. I walked around by myself now.

I was now in a place like a library. I found a book on a table that interested me. It seemed to be written in Hebrew and had colorful art on the jacket, like an Art Nouveau version of Hans Christian Andersen.

I was a little annoyed that I couldn't read the book. From a stack of books on a balcony above me, the voice of an unseen man began calling at me. The man sounded kind of nersy and annoying. But he was yelling at me that my time was coming soon, and that I was going to die.

I was really annoyed by the guy, but I decided to ignore him. Suddenly I found a section of the book I was looking at that was written in English. Finally I could understand the book.

Good morning everybody. I remember two dreams from last night. I wrote them down late, so my day memory might be clouding them up a little.

Two side notes: the bowling alley in the first dream comes from an msn.com photo article I read about huge mansions. Almost every mansion had a movie theatre and a bowling alley.

Also, the cops coming to my house is from my waking life. My upstairs neighbors always slam and slam on the floor. I feel like it's done to hurt me, like they don't want me around. It's been going on for a long time. I've finally called the police, because it's gotten so constant, loud, and violent that I'm afraid to come home. I feel terrible for calling, because I've never wanted to be the kind of person who calls the police on people. But I also have a fear of the police.

Dream #1

I was in a car with my old friends D and Y, riding through the parking lot of a bowling alley. It was probably night time. D was probably driving the car.

We let Y out, probably to run in and get a lane. For some reason, the car now seemed to be gone. D and I were walking away from the bowling alley, as if we had finished the game and were walking to the car.

I really wasn't happy to have to hang around with D, and I think I was making that known to him. At some point it became dark, like at night. D was wearing a shiny, black leather jacket. I asked him how his life was. He broke down and started crying about how his mother had died.

It was daytime again. I felt really bad for D, and I tried to comfort him. He kind of brushed me off and told me it was fine. Apparently his mother had had a terminal disease which acted very quickly on her. D told me something his mother had told him before she died, which made him feel better about the whole thing. It made me think of toothpaste for some reason.

We had been wandering through the first few rows of the parking lot, more like we were waiting for Y to arrive with the car again, although it was also like we were trying to find the car. But now we were walking back toward the bowling alley.

The parking lot had been asphalt. But now it was dirt. The dust was floating up into the blue sky, as if there were a lot of traffic or wind in the parking lot, even though I couldn't see any activity.

Some old friends of ours came up to me and D. They started saying a lot of teasing things to D. But I got really angry and threatening with them, telling them to leave D alone, he'd had to deal with enough already. Everybody said sorry and left D alone.

We were all walking back toward the bowling alley. We were close to the building, but the actual entrance now felt so far away. I somehow got separated from the rest of the group. I walked all by myself, in a stretch of dirt road between the building-front's sidewalk and a long strip of concrete island.

The ruts in the ground looked like horse carriages ran through it. I thought to myself, Of course they do. That's how things worked in the Old West. And that's where I am.

I wondered where the heck the car was. I couldn't remember if I was going into the bowling alley or going home. But if I was going home, I wanted to get in the car and go. And if I was going into the bowling alley, I wanted to take the car to get there quicker.

But I thought to myself, No car is ever going to come pick you up, dummy. This is the Old West. We didn't have cars back then.

Dream #2

I had called the police because the people upstairs from me were slamming and slamming on the floor again. It was morning, and the light in my bedroom was grey and slightly dim. The police knocked on my door.

I opened the door. There was just one officer: a short, slightly overweight, black woman in her late 40s or early 50s. She told me that I had called the police so many times that I was now under investigation myself. She would have to search my house.

I said fine. I let her in. I just let her go wherever she wanted in my house. I went back to my bed and lay down. I figured that I wouldn't follow the officer around. That would look suspicious, like I had something to hide, which I didn't.

But I slowly realized that my apartment was actually very large (which it is definitely not in waking life). I realized I had a lot of rooms, and that as soon as the officer saw how many rooms I had, she'd get jealous of me and try to find some reason to arrest me.

So I started running through the house, trying to find the officer. I figured that I'd explain how much room I had in this house by telling the officer that my mother also lived here with me.

I was actually surprised by how many rooms I had in the house. I hadn't realized this place was so big. But a lot of the rooms were done up in such a hyper-girly way, with pink and purple colors, stuffed animals, and fluffy, lacy bed covers, that I felt like someone other than I had to have been living here. I gradually became convinced that my mother was in fact living here with me.

Now, confident that my story was the truth, I felt like I could confront the officer with my story, preventing her from getting jealous and throwing me in jail for some made up reason.

I found the officer in a hyper-girly room, sitting on the bed. She started talking to me about something, but I can't remember what. All I remember is that she seemed to be very sad.

Hi. I am new to this site. This is my first dream post here.

I was on the phone with either my mother or my aunt. My mom/aunt told me that my grandmother had died.

I felt bad that I hadn't been able to get back home to see my grandmother before she died. But it had happened so quickly, as such a surprise.

My mom/aunt told me that my grandmother had said something very nice about me before she died. I felt awful, thinking that I hadn't done enough to show my love for someone who loved me so much.

I may have started crying a lot.