The Dream Magic Experiment

~12:20 am - sleep, breath zhine, 9 purif
~6:30 am - wakeup

I was in a dorm. I was there because of a retreat. There were several double- or triple-decker beds. It seems men and women are in the same room. We were planning something. I remember seeing RP and LR there. There was a plastic bottle of twinkly stuff there that we opened (accidentally?), and it spread. It's hard to put into the bag. I also remember seeing my crush RS, but he doesn't look the same. Also, he looks smaller. Or maybe that's he's actual height, and not seeing him for a long time made me forget. I also recall one guy who spit on the bed. MY bed, to be specific.

I entered a bathroom after three people went out. It was one man and two women. I entered, and the place looks so backward. The bathroom was big enough, but it simply looks so dank, the walls and floors not even tiled, although thankfully the toilet looks clean enough. Also, the "shower" is nothing more than a busted pipe flowing water down from the ceiling. The funny thing is that it seems automatic, in the sense that it turns on automatically when I'm close enough, and turns off when I'm away. Then there's a metal drum about stomach height filled with water that I assume I would use to bathe, if in case the shower doesn't work.

I also remember being online, searching for something. And there's a sex act going on, with the woman on top. She was complaining to me that I don't include lesbians in my website. This kind of confused me because it doesn't look like she's a lesbian when she's doing it with a guy. They were so close in view, too.

I was in my room, on the bed, one evening. Cat was there as well, lying closer to the wall. He was wearing a white shirt. He (or I) was reading something, then he lied down on his back, his eyes closed. I lied next him coz I wanted to look at his sleepy face. When I got closer, I saw his eyes are still open slightly. When he saw me, he suddenly looked funny at me. I told him I just want to watch him as he sleeps. He turned around, facing the wall.

I went somewhere and went back. Cat was talking on the phone, facing the wall (or maybe pretending that someone called him). Then he said he has to go. I got sad. When he was about to go out the door, I reached for his hand and asked him where he's going. He said he's just going to the bathroom. I slowly let go of his hand as he slowly walked away into the bathroom, while both of us still looking at each other. I finally lost sight of him when I closed the door.

I went somewhere far. Bacolod? Morning. I was looking at eye/sunglasses in a store. I went out. I was in downtown Bacolod. I ran, sad and depressed, because he left me. Then I wondered, what if he just went somewhere, and he was going to return, but then he didn't find me at home, so we just went away? I got more depressed.

It was near the pier in Toledo. I ran. I was near the pier. The beach, with clean, white sand. There were some plants. I jumped over into lower ground on the beach, which was more than six feet high (I'd normally feel very uncomfortable jumping from that height). I felt sad, but at the same time, I didn't mind getting hurt physically, because the pain in my heart hurt more.

Then I reached a place on the beach where there are more people. There is a family of two male parents; they're married and they have three kids, having a blast at the beach. I checked the next "jump," and it was a lot higher. Too high. I saw a bamboo ladder going down. I told myself I'll go down and once I'm lower, I'll jump backwards onto the sand. I then hid my mobile phones in my short pants in a way that they won't get damaged.

I crossed stepped into the bamboo ladder and started going down. Then, at a height I thought I'd still be uncomfortable, I let myself fall backwards. I landed. It was closer than I thought.