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    CanisLucidus

    1. Prison Break

      by , 03-14-2013 at 04:23 PM
      This was the first of two lucid dreams from last night. I've had a very irritating cough the last few days, so this gave me the perfect excuse to combine menthol cough drops with my usual Wednesday galantamine night. And yet again, the pre-game LD psych-up session with NewArtemis not only helps me get lucid but also makes her pop up as a DC!

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #76: Prison Break

      I'm experiencing hypnagogic imagery that involves some dark, concrete courtyard. I go through some transition (not sure whether DILD or WILD) but I somehow wind up in this scene, fully lucid.

      I'm crouched in the shadows by a low stone wall. I'm dressed all in black and I have a submachine gun or carbine (with suppressor attached) clutched in my hands. I don't want to use it unless I'm forced to -- I know that I'm here to break someone out of prison and if I'm forced into a firefight I'll be surrounded by guards in minutes.

      I become aware that I have an earpiece in my left ear and NewArtemis is radioing instructions to me on how to pass through the prison undetected. Her voice is calm, clinical, and precise. "Stay low and keep close to this wall. Stop before you get to the light."

      I stay crouched down and creep along the wall toward a well-lit spot near a gap in the wall. My footsteps are alarmingly loud, like I'm wearing some kind of clunky loafers. I wince at the sound. I decide that I want to be barefoot and immediately I am. I skulk even more carefully this time, trying to move sort of like what's-his-face from "Splinter Cell". Now my footsteps are completely silent. I feel really smug about this.

      I stop just before reaching the spotlit area. Pausing for a moment, I rub my hands together to stay connected with my dream body. NewArtemis again: "[CanisLucidus], check your 2." I take this to mean "2 o'clock", and indeed at 2 o'clock I see a darkened guard tower. A lone guard with a rifle patrols here and I'm surprised to see that he's completely black-clad just like I am. I think that I have a good shot at killing him pretty cleanly from where I am, but I don't even want to go there.

      "He's turning. Go now." I think about rolling for a moment but decide that's too fancy-pants. Instead, I just scurry across the lit area and into a new set of shadows.

      "Good. Stick to the wall and head to the opposite end of the exercise yard. The way inside will be on your right." I move along the wall all the way to an ultra-dark corner of the yard. The doorway is about forty feet away, a pair of solid-looking steel doors arranged like the doors of an elevator. I'm wondering how I'm going to get in when
      I awaken in a fit of coughing.

      Updated 03-14-2013 at 04:54 PM by 57387

      Categories
      lucid
    2. On a Dark Rooftop

      by , 03-07-2013 at 06:15 PM
      This lucid was extremely short (perhaps 20 seconds), a length that I'd normally consider a micro-lucid and not journal here. But it was so vivid and striking that it's really stuck with me. It's one of those dreams where you just remember every detail.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #73: On a Dark Rooftop

      I'm pawing at hypnagogic imagery, and I sense that I can reach out with my hand to touch a solid floor. It works, and a dream scene takes shape. It's night and I'm crouched on the rooftop of a one-story house on the crest of a hill. I'm dressed in head-to-toe in black (yes, I admit, like a ninja ) and I feel silent, coordinated, and infinitely agile.

      I look all around me. Suburban streets lie in every direction. There's a faint reddish glow on the horizon, and I sense some kind of threat or danger gathering in the distance.

      In my head, I clearly hear the voice of an old man: "Even in these dark days, my people yet retain a shadow of their former glory."

      His words fill me with an enormous sense of urgency -- I have work to do. A cold wind picks up. I prepare to leap to an adjacent rooftop,
      but the dream ends.

      I work at DEILD for a while, but just can't get back in.
    3. The Celebrity

      by , 02-28-2013 at 04:01 PM
      I wish that I'd asked this character what he represented rather than falling back so readily to fight or flight! My emotional control wasn't great in this LD but at least I guided myself toward a Task of the Year goal.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #70: The Celebrity

      I WILD into a wooded campground. There's a crowd of excited DCs nearby, all waiting to meet this one guy who seems to be some kind of celebrity. The "celebrity" is an uncharismatic, mid-40s, somewhat ugly guy with a dark mustache. In spite of this, all of the women in the crowd are swooning and the men are excitedly pushing past one another for a chance to shake his hand.

      In between handshakes, the celebrity keeps doing these loud, visibly moist sneezes directly into his hand... just before using it to shake the hand of the next starstruck DC. I find the whole scene repulsive, so I decide to hurry past.

      As I pass by the crowd, the celebrity turns to me and offers me a handshake. I think that I'm supposed to be honored, but I have no interest in touching his sneeze-hand. I politely pat his shoulder and turn to leave, refusing the handshake.

      There's a murmur of surprise from the crowd, but I try to ignore them, thinking instead of the tasks that I have in mind. The celebrity charges toward me and thrusts his hand in my face, insistent that I pay my respects. No, thanks. I turn away again, but when I do, the celebrity disrespectfully slaps me on the butt! I'm unbelievably offended at being treated this way in my own dream. My first thought is to turn around and just wreck this dude.

      I decide that escape's the better move, though, so I Hulk-jump away. Somehow the celebrity grabs onto my leg as I go, though, and ends up flying with me. We land in another part of the campground and again he wordlessly extends his sneeze-hand toward me for a handshake. I try another jump, but he keeps hanging on.

      I'm really angry that he's interfering with my LD and I think of the Colosseum Task of the Year ('Have a "fight to the death" with a DC in the Colosseum.') Yes, I think that I've found just the DC for killing. "I'm taking you to the Colosseum," I tell him, and grab him by the throat. His expression never changes, but his neck, arms and torso start rapidly expanding as if he were packing on slabs of muscle right before my eyes. Within a few seconds, he's transformed into a hulking, dangerous-looking gladiator.

      Still holding him by the throat, I jump again. The celebrity looks like he weighs about 260 now, but fortunately I can move him easily when I jump. I have a gladius in my hand, but I hold back on using it until the time is right. My enemy is wearing some kind of armor now, and he's no longer looking for a handshake. I give my gladius some practice swings and mutter some threats that I can no longer remember. The celebrity doesn't respond.

      Now we crash down on a floor of sand. I think that this is it! I can see a low stone wall all around us but above that it's just darkness where the crowd should be. I will the scene to come into focus, but the darkness just descends heavier and heavier until
      the dream ends...

      Lost Lucid Dreams and Fragments
      I also had a number of longer lucid dreams last night that were mostly wiped from my memory! My guess is that these were very low-level lucids where I lost lucidity. I'm a bit distressed to know that I am capable of losing LDs like that. I'm pondering what I should do to address this.

      Lost Lucid #1 - I'm flying high over a huge canyon near sundown, aware that I'm dreaming and holding a pile of dog poo in my bare hands. I am in a hurry to get somewhere.
      Lost Lucid #2 - An old man is in my kitchen showing me how to make gold out of simple household ingredients (including mud.) I know that I'm dreaming, but I watch in fascination.

      Also, one lucid fragment:

      Lucid Fragment #1 - I'm looking at a DJ entry on DreamViews. It has a single comment with a very long first paragraph. I become lucid when I see that the comment is from "BadArtemis" rather than "NewArtemis". Quickly wake up.

      Updated 02-28-2013 at 04:04 PM by 57387

      Categories
      lucid , task of the year
    4. After the Storm

      by , 02-07-2013 at 04:27 PM
      This was a nice, very vivid LD where I was reunited with a long-gone childhood pet. It was more difficult than usual to connect to my tasks and goals. In fact, I could remember very little from waking life. I'm wondering whether this is because it was galantamine night, which required me to use an extremely short WBTB.

      And my ever-reliable nose pinch RC let me down!

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #63: After the Storm

      I'm walking with my 3-year-old E in the back yard of what I think is our family home. The yard is vast, wild, and overgrown. As we walk, a Golden Retriever comes up to us and starts sniffing my hand. He looks almost exactly like the dog that I had when I was a kid, but I dismiss this as coincidence.

      I wonder how this dog got into our yard. E, the dog, and I walk to to edge of the property and I see that the entire fence is destroyed. Nothing but a couple of snapped fenceposts remain. Looking further out, I see that our next door neighbor's house has been utterly destroyed.
      I think that this must be a dream. I perform the nose pinch reality check and can't breathe. I try it again and still can't breathe. "Oh shit," I think. "This is really happening."

      The three of us walk further through town. Everywhere we look, houses are toppled and people sift dispiritedly through the rubble. I tell my son, "E, I think there's been a big tornado. Daddy's going to figure this out."

      We walk across an empty four-lane road. Some of the shops on this road are open, which strikes me as odd. I RC again, pushing my finger into my palm.
      My left hand stretches like stiff taffy and I know that this is a dream.

      I look down at the Golden Retriever and realize that he really is the same dog that I had when I was a boy! He's been gone almost fifteen years but now he's somehow standing right in front of me. I scratch him behind the ears. He just looks off into the distance with that big, goofy doggy grin. Even though I know that this is all a dream, it feels like a reunion.

      E pets the Golden and starts fiddling with his ears. The dog pants and stares contentedly up at the sky. I decide that now is the right time for me to break off on my own.

      I walk further along the road. I know that I had lots of plans for this lucid dream but I can't remember any of them. As I'm pondering this, a steady flow of traffic starts on the road and in a few seconds, cars are whizzing by in both directions. I remember a conversation with Xanous and Alyzarin about how they like to play in traffic during lucid dreams.

      I start walking across the road. I'm halfway across when I suddenly realize that the cars are driving on the left side of the road (like in Great Britain or New Zealand.) The next thing I know, a small, strange, open-topped car is barreling toward me. Suddenly I'm scared that this car is going to flatten me and I try to force-push it to the side. The little car swerves to the left and its brakes squeal. I float up into the air, drifting slightly away.

      The car has stopped and its driver, a woman of about 30, is leaned forward toward the steering wheel. Her eyes are squeezed shut as if she's in pain. I run or fly to the side of her little open-topped car, freaked that I've hurt her somehow when I did that force-push. "Are you okay? Are you okay?"

      She doesn't respond, but she's clutching at her stomach. There's something horribly wrong with her. Her stomach is badly distended, stretching all the way down so that it rests on the floorboard of her car. I pick up her enormous, stretched stomach off of the floor and start feeding it back into her body. It takes some effort, but in the end it spools smoothly back into her torso as if nothing had ever happened.

      She looks at me and smiles. I notice for the first time that she's incredibly attractive and I kiss her.
      (Guess I got over the stomach thing!) I pull away before I get myself totally distracted and she drives off, waving as she goes.

      Again I try to remember my goals and again they won't come. I finish crossing the road and leap about twelve feet into the air, perching on a crumbling arbor by the side of the road. I look out over the ruined city and see that the destruction stretches for miles. I can't even seem to find my house anymore. Is the destruction getting worse? What's happening to this place?

      I consider where to explore next but
      the dream soon ends.
    5. It Has to Be the Colosseum!

      by , 01-31-2013 at 05:30 PM
      Another fun effort at Task of the Year. I just need to wind up in the right stadium next time. Again, with the gladius-waving DEILD tech that Xanous and I worked out. What a breakthrough that's been!

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #61: It Has to Be the Colosseum!

      I'm standing in front of a hotel, holding my 3-year-old son E. A van pulls up nearby and a gang of suspicious-looking men pours out. It looks to me like they're planning a robbery and I wonder what to do.

      E points at the men and bleats, "Want to know what they are doing!" The men turn toward us, eyes narrowed. I feel like they're thinking, "Witnesses." I'm scared. I feel like they'll see us as loose ends to tie off, and I hustle back into the hotel lobby with E in my arms.

      As I'm casting about for some place to hide,
      I realize that it's all a dream. I head toward a huge window at the back of the lobby, planning to phase out of the lobby and get into the air for a task. Everything has started to feel unstable and low-fidelity. The sunlight pouring in through the lobby window has started to look like one big blur. E no longer feels heavy and squirmy like a toddler. It feels more like I'm holding a backpack.

      I relax and prepare myself for DEILD, and the dream soon goes black. Like I've done so often recently, I imagine that I'm holding a gladius in my right hand and start madly swinging it around. It takes a few tries to convince myself, but the feeling soon takes hold.

      In a few more seconds, I hear a roaring crowd of spectators all around me. I know that I'm already out in the middle of the arena. Some people in the crowd seem to be counting -- don't know what to make of that.

      All at once, the whole scene falls into place visually. I'm in a completely cel-shaded, cartoony world, and standing in the middle of an enormous football stadium, right on the 50-yard line. An Asian lady in a business suit walks hurriedly toward me saying, "Great, you're here. Let's get going."

      My new handler looks in every way like a cartoon character, as does the crowd, the field, the stadium, and everyone in it. Some sort of production crew is wandering around on the field setting up camera and lighting equipment. This is so close to being what I need, but for Task of the Year, I need to be in the Colosseum.

      I plead with her that, "It has to be the Colosseum!" but she doesn't seem to hear me. I repeat myself, "I know you're trying, but this isn't quite right. It has to be the Colosseum! Nothing else will work!"

      Nobody hears me, though. Everyone seems to be too busy getting this cel-shaded sporting event ready and can't pay me any mind. I'm thinking about how I can change things in my favor, but I'm not far into this when
      I wake up.
    6. Lost in America

      by , 12-20-2012 at 10:24 PM
      This was the second of my galantamine dreams from last night. The beginning and middle were fun. The end? Not too good.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #47: Lost in America

      The wind is loud outside but the noise suddenly settles into a murmur. I know that I'm close to a WILD, and soon... I'm in a light rail station, holding hands with my son E. The floor is red brick and the sky above us is clear. Tall buildings surround us on all sides. I don't recognize the buildings, but for some reason I believe that this is New York.

      I tell E, "Well, buddy, we're in New York. This is... well, this isn't real, but it's a train station." He hops around, pointing gleefully at the train. I walk with him to the opposite end of the station.

      The train starts to move, and E suddenly breaks away from my grip and runs toward it! I'm panicked at the site of him running carelessly toward that train and I run after him. He stops short of actual danger and I grab onto his hand, making sure I've got a good grip this time. "E, you can't do things like that! If you're going to run off, we can't be here."

      I take him with me out to a parking lot and our family car is waiting there.
      There's a small memory gap here, but I'm pretty sure that the car didn't have child seats, but I just ignored this. We're driving in the neighborhood where I grew up. E is there at first but after a few blocks I look back and he's gone.

      I pass a set of kids that look like they're fighting. I can't tell what's going on but it looks like someone might be taking a beating. I jump out of the car, forgetting that it's still moving. To my dismay, the car keeps going, turns the corner by itself and drives out of sight. The kids disperse, and nobody seems upset anymore.
      There's another memory gap before I find myself being shown a house by a real estate agent who looks kind of like CSI's Marg Helgenberger. She calls herself "Madge" and the house has a beautiful, open interior. I'm impressed with the place and wonder if it's similar to any other houses I've seen IWL.

      When she takes me into the back of the house, though, things take a horrible turn. The rooms in the back are dark and smoky with makeshift drapes blocking out the sunlight. Drug addicts are passed out all around the place, laying on beds, floors and furniture. Some of them twitch occasionally and I see one man whose leg is streaked with blood. Madge seems mildly embarrassed and says, "It does need a little fixing up."

      When we get to the bathroom, I see a clearly dead man lying in the tub. I panic,
      probably lose lucidity, and run back down the hall. Madge is running too, but the hallways have all changed. I can't find my way back to the sane part of the house and my panic collapses the dream.
    7. The Blind Man, the Bully, and the Nerd

      by , 12-20-2012 at 09:04 PM
      A wild chain of false awakenings and DEILDs finally led me to a most interesting encounter with Wife's DC, who was even more irrepressible than usual. This was the first of two lucid dreams from last night's session with galantamine.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #46: The Blind Man, the Bully, and the Nerd

      I'm in the kitchen with Wife. I'm talking to her but I'm almost completely blind. I'm embarrassed by my blindness, convinced that it's some side effect of the galantamine that I just took. Rather than seek medical attention, I try to slink up to bed so Wife won't know. Unfortunately, she keeps asking me to hand her things, and I flail around the kitchen knocking things over. "What's wrong with you?" she asks. I have a false awakening into...

      ...sitting on the floor of our living room as my 1-year-old son "R" runs around me. My vision is dim but I can see better than before. I'm still convinced that I'm suffering from some kind of bizarre galantamine side effect. R is sprinting around the room, pulling objects off of tables, knocking stuff over, and tossing various knickknacks into the recycling bin. I try to stop him, but he just laughs, squirting right through my arms when I try to grab him. He says, "This is so fun, Daddy!" and I briefly become lucid, remembering that he's way too young to speak like that.

      I quickly wake up but keep my eyes shut and hold still for a DEILD... and I find myself lying in a bed in a room I don't know. I get up, ready to explore. A strange, gnome-like creature with a hooked nose hops off of the floor and gets in my face, waving his arms wildly about. He's about three feet tall, covered with warts, extremely agile, and very annoying. He brags to some unseen listener: "See? I can stop him from doing what he wants in this dream!"

      I try to leave the room but the little gnome keeps hopping up in my face, cackling and poking at me. He jabs me in the eyeball and I get incredibly angry. I grab the gnome by the throat, push him to the floor and hold him there. He growls and kicks his legs, but he isn't able to move. Even though he's immobilized, I'm so out of control that I still punch him once, hard right under his left eye. I immediately feel terrible about this and release my grip, allowing him to scamper away.

      I stand there brooding about this for a moment before the gnome walks back in. He no longer looks disgusting and infuriating, but just like a small little man. I tell him, "I'm sorry that I hit you. I didn't need to do that." He walks up to me, points at his blackened left eye and softly says, "Fix." I nod, touching his bruised skin, and the black eye immediately heals. "All right, hug it out," I say and I kneel down to hug the little dude. The dream fades...


      I buckle down for another DEILD and in a few seconds I'm back in another bed room, although it's different from the last. I'm standing and Wife is here making the bed. "Hey!" I say. "This is a lucid dream. Quit making that bed and let's go play."

      She keeps making the bed. "You can go do what you like, but this work still needs to get done."

      I can't believe it. "But it's all a dream. You don't have to worry about whether beds get made. Come on, I've got lucid goals I want to work on."

      She stops for a second, laughs, and looks at me, wrinkling up her nose a bit. "Lucid goals? What does that even mean? You better not be trying to arrange a threesome on the bed that I just spent all this time making!"

      "Come on, get serious. You'll like this... I want to visit the Great Pyramid." Then I look at her, hold out my right hand and say, "You will come with me."

      She laughs. "Oh my God, nerd! I can't believe you just tried to 'command' me. Is that the kind of stuff you do in these dreams of yours?"

      I smile, amazed at how like herself she is and how much I'm enjoying her company. "I think I can do this, though," I say, and levitate her a few feet off of the ground. She looks amused.

      I float her over to me and set her on the ground. When I try to kiss her she doesn't resist. I feel her fingers graze my left temple but then she turns to walk away. "I still need to make this bed," she says,
      as the dream fades.

      Updated 01-11-2013 at 06:50 PM by 57387

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening
    8. The War of the Wolves

      by , 12-12-2012 at 05:04 AM
      The second of two WILDs that I experienced last night on galantamine. This dream was much longer than it sounds, since I was in the mood to watch, go slowly, and take in the scenery. Once again I asked a question of my subconscious, and the "answer" struck me as much more ambiguous this time.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #42: The War of the Wolves

      The WILD drops me at a dinner party in a fancy house. All of the DCs here are in cocktail dresses and tuxedos. All are strangers.

      I walk out into the night past a stone patio, looking up to admire the dome of stars above me tonight. Just past the patio is a sort of desert garden. It's a huge, man-made sandpit where well-tended cacti and yucca plants grow among carefully arranged boulders and signs that indicate the name of each species of plant.

      I decide to ask my subconscious a question. "Should I ever try galantamine again?" I shout. There's no vocal reply, but a large, gray wolf creeps from around one of the boulders. He looks at me, saying nothing, but slowly baring his teeth.

      My two Siberian Husky dogs (IWL pets) emerge from behind a boulder of their own, and charge at the wolf! They're much smaller than the wolf, but they unhesitatingly go after him. K (the female) lunges for his neck, but the wolf swivels his hind end around and parries her to the side. The wolf swats B (the male) in the face before pouncing on him and bringing him to the ground.

      The fight is ugly and one-sided, but (fortunately) completely bloodless. My two dogs run off further into the desert and the wolf approaches me. I'm afraid of him, but try not to dwell on it. I extend my hand toward him, palm forward, as if to say, "Stop." He seems to sense that this is more a plea than a command, and he lunges at me, biting down hard on my hand! For a moment, the pain is alarmingly vivid, but I do my best to ignore it.

      After a moment, the pain subsides and the wolf lets up his pressure. Silently, he turns and walks off into the desert. I walk further along, the coolness of the desert air quickly calming me. Eventually I happen upon a dark sea. By now I feel totally at peace. I stand on the shore and watch the waves for a while
      until the dream ends.

      Updated 01-11-2013 at 06:51 PM by 57387

      Categories
      lucid
    9. This Mortal Life

      by , 12-12-2012 at 04:43 AM
      The first of two WILDs that I experienced last night on my first-ever trial with galantamine. Both of these dreams were very vivid and stable but had a much more somber, vulnerable feel than my usual LDs. Confidence was far, far below normal levels, which gave this dream a very different shape than most for me.

      Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

      Lucid #41: This Mortal Life

      I'm in a high-rise condo, looking out over a nighttime cityscape. I float to the window but it feels like it takes much more effort than usual. The beauty of the city below captivates me, though, and I spend a long while watching the headlights of the cars below as they travel the grid of city streets.

      Outside of the condo is a bank lobby. All manner of friends and family from my waking life are wandering about conducting their business. I talk at length with different people I've lost touch with, asking them about what direction life has taken them. As I talk to each of them, they gradually grow old and tired, sitting down in chairs along the walls of the room. Once seated, the old version of the person looks away from me and lapses into silence.

      The adjacent room is a grand ballroom where a group of perhaps two dozen strangers is having a cocktail party. The level of detail on these DCs is unnecessarily high, bordering on ridiculous. Shoulder blades shifting gently under the skin, moles, those subtle wrinkles that you don't notice in waking life.

      I want to move on to a new location, and I think of the "Trinity" atomic detonation Task of the Year. I planned to portal, so I try to produce a portal gun with an over-the-shoulder grab I've used time and again to produce items. But I see my hyper-detailed shadow on the floor, and it's got nothing on its back. Sure enough, my hand comes back empty. I try this over and over, but after enough tries I have to give in. I try phasing through a pane of glass, but it's as solid as waking life. I try floating, but now I seem rooted to the ground. Even though I know that all of this is my dream, I just can't muster the confidence and belief necessary to put this into action. I feel like just another DC in my own dream.

      Outside of the ballroom I spot Wife walking with my sister-in-law and brother-in-law. I join them, and she tells me that they're heading down to the vaults underground. I'm interested, and I follow them through a long series of tunnels. I spend much of this time trying to convince Wife to try out lucid dreaming, but she keeps insisting that she's got important business in the vaults to worry about first. As I probe further into this,
      the dream ends.

      Updated 01-11-2013 at 06:53 PM by 57387

      Categories
      lucid