Agapito

I flew last night over trees with my sister, Maria, and it was exhilarating. I saw someone walking far below, and flew behind leaves so they wouldn’t see because I thought they might wonder how someone is flying, unless the person was Maria. At that, Maria was flying with me, and I said “Flying in dreams is such an important life skill which I had lost. You have no idea how hard it has been.” Then I came to a golden pillar, as of a temple, and held it as if the substance of the temple understood.

Later, I was walking under a tree that was full of lights. Someone pointed under the tree and said “Your bulb is there.” I hadn’t seen it, but there was indeed a large bulb, which I picked up.

That last part of the dream reminds me of what Jesus said, “I am the Vine and you are the branches.” The feeling of having fallen from the vine is an anxiousness sensation that I have had at other times in life, but then I remember the other parable, of falling, “Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.”

When I awoke, I set the dream in verse:

My bulb had fallen from the vine of lights,
but I recovered it beneath a tree,
within a dream realm, after joyful flights,
when someone pointed out the bulb to me.
The bulb will do no good, though, in my pocket.
For it to shine, I have to find the socket.

I thought of the candlelit mass on the night of Easter vigil, where everyone lit their candle with someone else’s flame, and I recalled the words of a hymn we sang that had made me think of Maria and brought me to tears…

I will hold the Christ light for you
in the night-time of your fear;
I will hold my hand out to you,
speak the peace you long to hear.

Running across a field toward Faneuil Hall, Boston, I heard someone calling my name, "Mario, Mario!" I was puzzled, because I looked around and did not see anyone. Then I noticed someone behind me, a black man who appeared very cheerful, happy, and funny. He asked me to follow him and set off running. I followed, running.

A flock of birds flew to him, and he joined them, becoming a bird, all of them flapping their wings quickly, flying fast. Though I was freaked, I continued following, and I heard him say, "The only sin you ever committed was when this…" and then I saw a pointed, thin, phallic-like arrow launched into the sky and quickly drop "…didn't go as high as this…" Then I saw an arrow that traveled in a hemispheric path, exploding beautifully with sparks and stars. "Your sins are forgiven through our Lord, Jesus Christ." At the end of the road, in the sky, was Christ Shining, with his arms outstretched to me.

dream archive 4/22/87

In 1986, when I was 22, after graduating the year before from Florida International University with a degree in Fine Arts and moving to Boston, I passed through a difficult period of life, feeling a sense of hopelessness and deep despair. At the beginning of this period I had dream in which I saw a butterfly fluttering in my hand, and some kind of toxins spilled on it, and it died. In the midst of this time in which I felt spiritually dead, I had a dream….

Funeral Noel

In a dream, I watched my funeral,
surprised to see it seemed a festival.
The happy mourners sang, as I was witness,
around my coffin, “We wish you a merry Christmas!”

Soon after, in March, 1987, I had this transformative, life altering, unforgettable dream of God's touch…

I walked on a slightly curved path of stones and realized that I was in the front yard of my childhood home in Virginia, by the beech tree for which I had always felt a strong affinity. It was around my same age and like a brother to me.

I felt the presence of three versions of myself: in all the surroundings, the sincere, childhood freshness, newness of everything, simple rapture under the night sky; an older version of my self, as a teenager experiencing a first awakening to the mystery of life and consciousness in the universe but with no living knowledge of the world, of working and suffering; and finally my self as I was, a mess in a mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical sense. As with my beech tree in winter, all the leaves had fallen.

I (we) stood beside the tree, and suddenly I felt a Subtle Fire being placed around me as if by two invisible cupped hands that felt as though they had sprung into the moment from outside the universe. For the first time in so long, I felt healthy and whole. I jumped for joy to know that the touch of God's love can create life from abject destruction and death. I flew over the house and the trees in a beautiful springtime world full of colors, toward the forest I had explored as a child. Far below, on the side of the house, I saw a sign with writing and three faces. I felt that that these were pictures of family and that the words written were: this trip is sponsored by the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

dream archive, 1987