• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

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    1. #140: Black / Korfbal / Tram / So many fragments

      by , 05-03-2016 at 07:20 AM
      Bed: 23.00
      Wake up: ~07.10
      Now: 07.35

      I'm in the setting of the movie How to Train Your Dragon. I'm in a stone valley. There's an alpha (level 10?) dragon which needs to be defeated. There are a lot of dragons around, but none are strong enough to challenge him. There's Toothless, the Night Shade, but he's not very big, whereas the alpha dragon is huge. There's quite a big dragon which might be a challenge to the alpha male. It has two long necks and two heads. It belongs to someone else though. The main character of this dream (I think I'm just spectating) sends a message on a scroll to the two people to which this dragon belongs to that he really needs their permission to use this dragon to defeat the alpha dragon. He doesn't get it, because the owners don't like him. Eventually he challenges the alpha male with Toothless. He wins.

      Not sure what I'm doing. I'm outside and one of my best friends makes a black joke. I consider seriously snapping at him cause I've had it with all the black jokes. Then I realise that this is the first black joke he's made in a very long time. Someone else has been making black jokes for so long that I've grown tired of it [in reality this is my housemate]. I decide not to lash out at him, but I do give him a note about how I value our friendship and that if he wishes to remain friends he should stop making black jokes. While he's reading it, I walk away, rounding two corners around a building that no longer exists in reality. There's 2 people doing something with horses in a trailer. I offer my assistance, despite me not having a single clue what to do. The only thing I do know is to stay away from the rear. Apparently one of the horses is pregnant. I want to assist, but she gives birth within just a few seconds. My friend joins me to tell me that he won't make black jokes. I'm relieved by it.

      I'm standing besides a bus. It's not a public service bus, but one of those touring rented ones. There's a small issue with regard to who will be sitting where. Eventually we leave, only to stop again shortly after because we've reached our destination. We park in front of a house. There's a kid that apparently holds the record for most amount of goals in one season of korfbal ever. At first I thought he would be a late teenager, but apparently he's even younger than that, judging from the photo.

      We're at a grass field. It's already dark out, but I can still see everything, I assume because of artificial lighting. I'm watching from the sidelines as other people are playing korfbal. There are 2 teams playing, but the way that they're playing makes totally no sense and it confuses me. It looks more like a sort of warm up. At some point a white girl of perhaps 3 years of age enters the field. She has Down syndrome. One of the players, an adult white male, scares her off the field by pretending to be a bull(?). He makes the same 'dragging your leg' movement that a bull does and it scares the girl. He follows her off the field. Her mom gets upset a bit about it. A bit later it all happens again. I think it's also kinda sketchy to frighten her.

      I'm sitting in the tram. There are a few teenagers (I guess) sitting just in front of me, talking. They're having a conversation about their sex lives, seemingly not caring that they're in public. Apparently a dentist didn't take one of their sex lives into consideration, because (s)he extracted a tooth from that person and that is now messing with her sex life. At some point these kids start messing around in the tram, dancing provocatively.

      Still in the tram, but I guess now with different people. They're talking about Indonesia, about the same university that I attended. I but in and say a few things about it, even though I don't know these people. The girl sitting closest to me asks me if I also want to go there. I explain to her that I've already gone and that I will go again.

      So many fragments
      » I'm talking with a girl about going to the cinema. It seems like it will be fun. Another girl in the mean time tells me that I should let the girl I'm going with know that I've got a girlfriend, because apparently she thinks that we're going on a date. Fuck. I'm not sure how to smoothly mention that I've got a girlfriend without it sounding weird.

      » I'm walking around a bit somewhere outside during the day. There's a weird architectural object in the middle of a black square. It's a sort of stairs which is ~ shaped if you look at it from the side (so going up, down, up). It doesn't have anything to hold on to.

      » I'm walking around outside during daytime. It's supposedly somewhere in the Netherlands (I'm assuming Amsterdam). I might be with my girlfriend. There's a museum which you can basically visit or kinda observe from the outside. There are a lot of people and there's a tour guide. It's a white guy my age and he's talking in crappy German. I wonder if I could do that. My German is about equally crap.

      » There's something to do with a train in the evening. I want to get home I guess, but I'm not getting anywhere cause of these trains. I think I'm around the Amsterdam ArenA area. I know there's more going on here, but I can't remember.

      » I'm standing in front of my mom's house on the 2nd floor. I'm looking down towards the parking lot. There's an attractive Vietnamese or Thai girl doing something with her car. I think she was washing it. I take a step back so that she won't see me. Then she is doing something else. Eventually we end up talking. It's a bit flirty/sassy. The kind where you're flirting, but trying to out-manoeuvre each other the whole time.

      Just realised that when I am able to recall the race of people, most often they are white. I wonder if this is gonna change in the next few months, as I'll be moving to Indonesia and the number of white people in the city in which I'm gonna live is very limited.

      Also realised that every time that I'm taking a train in a dream, it's not getting me where I want to go.
    2. #137: Cousin / Company visit

      by , 04-30-2016 at 07:08 AM
      I'm in the living room at my mom's house (I think). I'm there with my cousin, his girlfriend and their newborn son. It's the first time seeing their son, so I take a good look. Hmm, I remember him looking differently on the photo. On the photo he really looked like my cousin. Now, not so much. For some reason I look at the window, looking at some green truck that's parked outside. I'm not sure anymore what happens after, or what the significance of the truck was.

      Company visit
      I've just exercised (physical therapy perhaps) and now I need to get somewhere. I'm running late though, so I don't have the time to shower first. I make it to the bus just in time. I had to cross the street quickly in between cars. I remember seeing the number of the bus, though I can't recall it anymore. I get in at the back. It's really crowded and I consider whether or not I should check in. I might get a fine if I don't do so, but on the other hand, it's so busy that they will never notice. I tell myself that I worry too much and don't check in. I already had my black backpack out in front of me, drawing out my wallet. I put it back in.

      I'm inside a building. We're going somewhere with the class. Guess I will have to try to shower here. It's a company visit and quite a prestigious company at that. I run into some classmates on the way up the stairs. There is one classmate going down as well. It's Aun. Later, when I'm up the stairs, I see Aun along with the people she regularly hangs out with. I ask her surprised if I didn't just see her walking down the stairs. She tells me it was X [forgot who]. I remember the hijabs of both persons being different colours, so I'm satisfied with the answer.

      We're in a big room and a presentation is starting. A lot of people are still being noisy. The lecturer in front of the class is one that most people dislike because she can't teach very well. She's trying to settle things down and someone hurls a nasty comment at her. Man.. we are so not making a good impression at this company. Eventually people settle down, except for to the far left in the back. Nick and Kristen are arguing with each other for what feels like 5 minutes. They either don't care or don't notice that everyone is waiting for them. Embarrassing.
    3. #132: Every man's dream / Graceful crash

      by , 04-25-2016 at 06:44 AM
      Bed time: 23.00
      Get up: 07.00

      Every man's dream
      I'm in the living room at my mom's house, close to the door to the kitchen. In reality there's a table positioned on the spot where I'm standing. I'm with my girlfriend, who is standing right in front of me, facing me. To her left (from my point of view) is another girl that I don't recognise. Then the best thing that can ever happen to a man happens

      Graceful crash
      I'm with a group of about 10 people, I think most of them family members. We're about to get into 2 cars. One of them is my mom's boyfriend's, the other my mom's. There's a pile-up of people in my mom's boyfriend's car. My cousin, my mom and I decide to take her car. I think it is my mom who mentions something about being fucked if the police passes by. We turn onto a highway. There's a building standing right next to the highway, just about positioned against it. My mom thinks the exit ramp should be around this point and starts going to the right. My cousin and I both warn her not to go.. and we're flying. There's no exit ramp. We're just falling to the ground. I brace myself. The impact is surprisingly low. We continue our way through a lot of smaller streets. I ask my mom if we can please just for once stop using the navigation system that her boyfriend has given her, cause it messes with us every single time. She finally agrees and asks me for my navigation (Google Maps on my phone). The display is totally different from reality though.

      I'm standing outside in a parking lot. It's dark. I'm with some people, though I can't remember who. There's something going on that has to do with Mexico. Cinco de mayo perhaps? At some point there's a lot of fireworks coming from a building. I think our intent was to fuck up the people who were inside it and this was how.
    4. #131: Pee

      by , 04-23-2016 at 07:13 AM
      I'm in Indonesia, somewhere in the nature, a jungle area. Something tells me that this is Pangandaran. I'm driving a moped with my girlfriend on the back. We're going back to.. a building or something? I don't know. A bit of a starting base. En route we pass my friend Sander, who is going in the opposite direction. I shout out to him. He's taking a mudtrail straight ahead. There's also a semi-trail a bit to the right. It's a more interesting location I think. I thought about turning around and following him, but I don't.

      My girlfriend and I are at the 'building'. I don't even really remember a building. I guess it's more of a resting area. At some point my cousin and her husband show up, along with their 3 kids. Suddenly I'm standing in the bathroom in my mom's kitchen, brushing my teeth. I exit to greet them while they walk through the hallway. My cousin's husband is first. Awkward handshake cause he's holding the baby. I'm not sure if we talk about motorcycles or that that happened in a later dream.

      I'm inside a building now with some people, including a few of my best friends. I'm sitting on a chair. A few people enter, including a blonde girl. She is somehow pretty and ugly at the same time, making her interesting. I think it's a shop we're in. The shop owner at the back wants them to speak in Indonesian, just as a friendly joke. The girl asks for help from us. I ask her in English what she wants to say. Somewhere early on I figure out she's Dutch, but still we talk in English for a bit more.

      A bit later on she decides to sit on my lap. My girlfriend is in this time room, so I wonder for a moment how this is going to go down. After a few seconds I realise she is in fact sitting on the lap of the woman to my left and her feet are on my legs. Her feet.. while she's wearing dirty shoes with some mud still stuck to the bottom. I think "takroe maniri" to myself [rude manners in Surinam]. I don't say anything for some reason. The woman on who's lap she is sitting does. She changes position so that she is still resting her legs on me, but not her feet, something like that.

      There's a big brown, old-looking bookcase. For some reason it's been decided that this is the ok place to pee, so I do so. The blonde girl is looking at me from an angle where I'm sure that she can see quite a bit. First I make an effort to conceal myself, but then I think 'fuck it'. Later on I go there to pee again. Somehow my aim is bad and I manage to splash myself. I can feel the warmth of the pee dripping in my pants. My hands are also wet. I dry them on a towel to my left. I'm feeling quite uncomfortable.

      I woke up immediately and went to the toilet shortly after. I couldn't fall asleep for another hour at least. In the beginning I felt very uncomfortable as I couldn't shake the feeling of having peed my pants, even though that didn't really happen. After that I had a load of short dreams about a lot of different things.
    5. #118: Fireless / Smash

      by , 04-04-2016 at 07:47 AM
      I'm lying in my bed at my mom's home, next to my girlfriend. It's just like how it's supposed to be. For some reason I'm pretty convinced that I'm dreaming. I decide to push one of my hands through the glass of the window. It goes through. I'm happy to finally be lucid again. There is a blue substance behind the window. Kind of like a body of water, but the texture is as if it has been drawn with crayons. I don't remember every single thing that I did with my lucidity. At a certain point I remembered a lucid challenge I had with werty52: create a flameball in your hand (he has already won that bet). I try to make it happen through several ways. I especially use different voice commands. None of them work. I consider the fact that I'm not believing in myself hard enough to make it happen. I then decide to do something else. I think I'm flying about for a bit. I'm a slightly annoyed by my lack of control over this dream.

      Somewhere in a fancy/modern hallway. I guess I'm just observing. Justen, along with a few other guys is in the hallway. They're all freerunners I think. At least Justen is, that much I know for sure. There's a slanted glass wall and he does a run up against it and tries to perform another trick, but he doesn't manage to finish it. He nearly defied gravity there. Then he runs through the hallway, does a round off > back full combo. While twisting in the air he smashes into an art piece that was standing in the hall. It shatters. It was made out of stone or keramic or something alike. It looked a bit like an old Greek head.
    6. #104: Fragments

      by , 03-05-2016 at 07:40 AM
      > I'm in my room at my mom's house, though the layout of my room is different. I'm using my laptop and am just about to shut it down. I think about the fact that there is still some porn running on it. I should probably close that down first. My little brother suddenly enters my room. I quickly close the lid on my laptop.

      > My mom's boyfriend is telling my little brother and I that it's about time to leave for the birthday of our cousin. My little brother isn't ready yet and is still doing some irrelevant things. I tell him to hurry and eventually I slap him across the face with a flat hand. Eventually, once we're outside, it turns out that my mom's boyfriend lied about how much of a rush we are in. I get pissed off and go back inside the house. Now I feel bad for hitting my little brother.

      > I'm at a family party it seems. There must be 20 - 30 people sitting on chairs in two long rows facing each other. I enter and say hai to everyone, cause going to everyone individually would take a lot of time. I see my 1,5 year old cousin. i think he's with my mom. I ask/tell him something and he tells me in Dutch that he doesn't want it, in a typical "I just learnt to say these words" type of speech pattern.
    7. #98: Just fragments

      by , 02-22-2016 at 06:58 AM
      > I'm not 100% sure that I'm taking part in this dream, as opposed to being a spectator. I think I am though. There's a group of people, mostly around their late teens. They are being hunted down by a group of.. something. At night they place a string made out of a particular item around their camp so that they can detect when the things come after them.

      > I'm with a woman who is about 10 years older than me and whom I haven't spoken to or thought about in a very long time. We're in a non-descript room that later turns into the living room at my mom's house. Before the room changes we're going at it in the very centre. After the room changes I can hear my mom walking about. I quickly run into the kitchen to avoid her.
    8. #90: Mac / Foot drainage / Alexandra

      by , 02-09-2016 at 08:23 AM
      I run into an old friend, Martin. He's standing somewhere near a wall, bend over poking around in his bag I think. I approach him holding his 17" Macbook Pro and my own 13". I ask him if he was looking for this. In fact he was. I think I thank him for letting me use it.

      Foot drainage
      I think I'm in my room at my mom's house. I'm concentrated on my foot, I think my right one. I got a wound there which is pretty fresh. It's still healing, getting a crust. I peel it off. I start thinking that I shouldn't do this, but I can't help myself. I've totally removed the crust. Next thing I squeeze and some stuff exits from the wound, in a similar fashion to toothpaste exiting its tube, except the hole is bigger and the stuff is pinkish. At one point I think I should stop, cause I'm draining my whole foot it seems. It's just sooo much.

      I'm standing in an Indonesian club, perhaps 2 metres away from a wall. My friend Alexandra is standing in front of me. We haven't seen each other in a very long time. We give each other a very big hug, one that seems to be a bit more than just friendly. There are perhaps 3 people standing against or near the wall on my left, I think I know all of them. At least 2 of them are female friends. Alexandra asks me what I think of them, but asks me in a way that makes it sound as if she is trying to gage whether she's got competition.
    9. #78: Arrow rain

      by , 01-26-2016 at 08:44 AM
      I think I went to bed around 23:30 last night. Woke up several times around 08:00 and it's now 08:30

      Arrow rain
      I'm outside during daytime. I think I'm out in the woods or something alike. There is a battle going on in which I'm involved. It's with old weapons, such as spears. My group is somewhat surounded by another group, but we're doing alright. I'm keeping guard on one side to make sure that no more hostile troops enter the area. In the distance I see a third party coming up. I warn a woman that is fighting along my side. It's a bunch of samurai. They unleash an enormous amount of arrows. I take cover. I'm lying on the ground somewhere, hands over my head and still not feeling safe. I take out my two swords, but that doesn't do me any good. It later turns out that the leader of the group of samurai is a guy that is on our side. He nearly got me killed though...

      » I'm with the ex-girlfriend of my housemate. She's lying a bit balled up on a couch. We're talking and she tries to flirt with me and even make a move. I don't think I allow anything to happen though.

      » I'm in the toilet at my mom's house. The tap is slanted towards the left. It just does that. It follows the gravity of the Earth, so in the morning it's slanted to the right and in the evening to the left.

      » Harvey Spectre from the series Suits is giving an explanation about tar sands. He drops a few names in the Netherlands, but also one in Indonesia, despite these tar fields being right next to one another.

      » I'm driving a car on a road outside an urban area. I pass two cars who seem to have gotten into an accident. The front one is a car2go.
    10. #71: Fragments

      by , 01-19-2016 at 09:03 AM
      I think I went to bed around 23:30. I woke up around 08:00 and it's now 09:00. Really didn't wanna get up!
      All I remember now are some fragments

      » I'm driving the moped that I don't have anymore in a town close to the city where my mom lives. It's already dark out and the moped doesn't have any lights. A police car with sirens comes up to me to stop me. I talk with the police officer for a while. He didn't only stop me for having no lights, but also for going through the intersections without slowing down. My counter argument is that I had right of way.

      » I'm in my mom's kitchen, doing some of the dishes for the neighbour, a white male. Near the end of it I feel like I am doing way too many dishes, considering how little time I spent here. I take a small cake that's wrapped in peppermint wrap and walk out the kitchen.

      » I'm driving my mom's new car on the highway. It's pretty deserted, save for a truck which is standing still across multiple lanes in a tunnel. I try to manouvre around it, but I damage the car anyway. The left side scrapes along the wall of the curved tunnel. When I check it later there isn't that much damage though.
    11. #70: Pink douchebag car

      by , 01-13-2016 at 09:28 AM
      I went to bed between 23:30 and 00:00 I think. I woke up around 08:00 and stayed in bed till 09:00.

      Pink douchebag car
      I'm at my physical therapist. I'm walking up the winding staircase. There's a girl standing at the top, preventing me from passing, though she doesn't seem to realise it. She's talking to a guy who seems kinda like a wannabe thug/pimp/playboy douchebag. I tap her backpack and say her name (Eve?) softly. She stands aside so that I can pass. She keeps her attention on the douchebag though. After a moment the douchebag comes up to me and asks me something like if I was talking to his girl, or something like that. I tell him that I only said her name so that I could pass. I ask him if he really thinks I could've said something meaningful that quickly. He walks back again.

      At some point the douchebag is driving his pink muscle or race car inside the room, around the table. The guy was supposed to bring the little brother of my best friend home, but apparently he's changed his mind. My friend asks him if he can at least bring her brother to the train station, cause else it's a 15 minute walk. I tell her it's only 5 minutes and that he'll be fine. I can clearly see the inside of the car. I can see that there are two seats and that one of them is empty. The guy really is a douche. He then drives it outside, through the door. I make a comment about the fact that the car is pink.

      My physical therapist walks outside. I assume it's to tell the guy not to bring his car inside. Once I'm outside as well the view is a bit obstructed because there are other people standing there as well, but it doesn't seem to be my physical therapist anymore who is standing there to talk to the guy. I think the person that has replaced my physical therapist is wearing a suit, though a bit shoddy. I start walking home. It's raining. On the other side of the road I see the little brother of another one of my friends. He keeps waving at me, hoping for me to acknowledge him. I wave back a few times, but I have to time it as if I were driving a bicycle. I'm annoyed with the rain. I think I've got my black hoodie on. At some point I look to my right, into a house. Is that my old classmate Daniėlle? She's standing just behind the window, making a coffee, using a big coffee machine. I consider the size of the machine for a moment. Then I look closer and think to myself that it must be her little sister and not Daniėlle.

      I don't know what's up with all the little brother's & sisters

      » I'm sitting on a couch, legs stretched out in front of me. Someone is sitting to my right. He jokingly punches me on my right leg, around the knee. He then moves to punch me on the left as well. I instantly tell him not to do that, cause I had knee surgery. He asks me what happened and I tell him that I tore my ligament.

      » I've got a whatsapp message from an old colleague I haven't spoken to forever. It appears on my lockscreen. I'm quite surprised by the fact that he'd message me.

      » I'm in my room at my mom's house. I look outside. It's daytime. On the other side of the road, next to the snackbar I see an old classmate. He seems to be waiting for someone I guess. I'm not too sure on what he's doing exactly. I think he can see me, so I try to move out of sight. I make the line of sight as small as possible so that I can peep in and out to keep tabs on him. Eventually he walks away.

      » Pretty sure I had another dream, but I can't remember what anymore

      » I'm not sure if it's me or someone else, but that person has to survive in a forest. I think it's snow covered. The person this dream focuses on is a woman I think, at least at some point. There are some militant-ish guys roaming the forest as well. She needs to watch out for them. At some point she wakes up because she had been drugged I believe. There are also some fennec foxes which she tries to play with, but which are a bit shy. Eventually she finds a cabin.
    12. #64: FA / Race

      by , 12-26-2015 at 12:04 PM
      I think I went to bed around 01:30. Not sure what time I got up anymore. It's now 12:00.

      I 'wake up' in my bed. I can hear my little brother in the living room. From the sound of it, he's still playing COD, even though it's 05:30 or 06:30. Damnit man. I get out of bed. I walk from my room, through his room, to the hallway. I stop in his room for a moment as I realise that I can't see anything. I feel as if my eyes are closed, except that they're open. I blink hard a few times and even consider that this is very dreamlike. Then I regain my vision and carry on. I swing the door to the living room open, ready to bust my brother. The lights are on and the two sons of my neighbour are on the couch, a bit freightened by me. I'm surprised and happy to see them. I get down on a knee and hold out my arms. They come running to me and headbutt in the process. I'm certain that somewhere I was lucid for just a moment.

      I'm not sure if I'm playing a video game, but the image that I see is fullscreen. It's off a sort of worm which is floating against a bit of an orangey, cartoony, clouded background. It's head and tail are nearly touching in a circle. Someone (me?) is racing along the outer edge of the worm. When making a jump you have to be careful not to jump too far away, else you'll fly out of it's orbit.
      lucid , false awakening
    13. #63: Penisslip / Gym / Sales / Rainbow carpet

      by , 12-24-2015 at 09:38 AM
      I was quite tired yesterday. Went to bed earlier than normal and read a chapter in my book. The chapter was so long that I ended up really going to bed around the same time as normal (about 23:45). I woke up around 08:30. It's now 09:00

      I'm in my mom's living room. I can tell by the big, black couch. I'm with my friend Sel. I can't recall why, but she is making me take off my shirt. There's nothing really sexual going on between us. I also have to take off my pants. Before doing so I take a moment to look which boxer I'm wearing, as I don't wanna embarrass myself with a childish boxer. It's an ok one. I pull my pants down, but the tip of my penis sticks out of the top of my boxer. Ah crap. I tuck it away asap, but Sel starts laughing and tells me she's already seen it. At this point I'm also hoping that I won't get a boner, because having a bulge in my boxer would be really obvious now. I'm hoping she will take something off as well. She is hot after all. She tells me that she is still dating Lukas. Really? Lukas? He is such a nerdy dude. I can't see them being together, her being out of his league. Also the thought that he is still with Lea is vaguely in the back of my mind.

      Gym (this dream is full of gaps)
      We have to travel a long way to a gym for some physical education class or something alike. We actually have to take the train or bus. The person I'm with and I decide to take the bus I think.

      I recall talking to a white male who was somewhat important. We're in a big room and he's showing us around a bit. He might be the dad of the person I'm with. Eventually we have to leave to take the bus again. It's gonna be a long ride.

      We're in the dressing room, along with some other people. It's time to go back home. Again we can choose between the train and the bus. I have a shitload of stuff to carry with me. I consider leaving some behind and picking it up on the second round, but then I remember how far it is and I don't want to do that.

      We narrowly miss the train I believe, so we decide to take the bus instead. While we're driving I come to the conclusion that I've left some stuff behind. Fuck. I call someone, but he's already left the gym as well.

      At some point while I'm still in the bus I hit the stop button, but I do so too early. I can see the train station a bit further in the distance. I consider getting off anyway, because I'm a bit embarrassed. The bus makes a stop, but I then realise I still have to put on my jacket and get all my stuff together. In the mean time some people start getting off. More and more until finally everyone has left. The bus continues driving with me on it and someone makes a comment which I can't remember. The bus descends rapidly as if I'm on a rollercoaster. I can actually feel the sensation and the tingling in my stomach. Then it's over and we've reached our destination.

      Outside of the bus there's a girl to greet me for some reason. A kind of hostess/promo girl. We strike up a conversation as we walk inside together. She talks about the time she had to sing for a group of people.

      » I'm looking at a fullscreen map of the Netherlands. It's all misshapen. Groningen [a city in the north-east] is in the south-west. The map shows some colouring that I don't understand around Groningen. It makes me wonder what it's supposed to represent.

      » My cousin tells us about how she was on the tram just now. She was seated and on the seats behind her, she had put two boxes. One were the parts for a very expensive cargo bike. Another was filled with baby stuff. When she turned around they were gone. Someone must've stolen them. I feel bummed out for her, but at the same time I wonder why she didn't switch places with her stuff so that she could keep an eye on it.

      » My friend Anthony has posted something on LinkedIn. I don't recall the exact message, but I recall thinking that this was more of a FB post. It's about being grateful or something and about a party. Next thing I'm walking in the park during daytime with my friend Jor. Anthony wants to join us, but apparently the two of them are having a fight. Anthony remains quite normal under it and gives me the gist of the story, whereas Jor definitely doesn't want to talk to him. This is a bit of a weird and uncomfortable situation. I pick out a spot in the park to put a blanket down and chill. At first I thought about getting myself involved, but they can figure it out for themselves.

      I'm the officemanager of a salescompany I used to work for. I'm surprised to find out myself, as I wasn't the best salesman. Even though I'm the manager, I don't know shit about shit and I feel like a fool. I get instructions rather than giving them. My people meet their targets though, which practically means free money for me.

      It's daytime and I'm in a public building where a kid is having his/her birthday party. We're out here to make some sales. I strike up a conversation with 1 or 2 people, but no success. Eventually we move outside, as there are more and more salespeople around this place, working for different charities. Outside are people from my office. It didn't occur to me, but suddenly I realise that I'm holding a BNN sign, which is a organisation that some of us are selling for. Not me though. I have a big laugh at this.

      Rainbow carpet
      Not sure if it's me or someone else, but someone is driving a car around and I'm in it. It's daytime and I can make out the street pattern quite well. At some point there is the consideration of where to park (as in, where is the free parking). I recall the places where you have to pay, so lets avoid those at least. We end up at a roundabout.

      The roundabout is a bit of a magical happy go lucky place. There's a fabric of some sorts which has been lain around the roundabout several times. It's rainbow coloured and quite soft and special. Polgara is also present. We are arranging the fabric again so that it's set properly. My little brother is there as well, sitting behind the computer. I tell him to come and help us. First he makes up the excuse that he's doing homework or something alike. Then he comes with a different excuse. And yet another. Dick.
    14. #61: Parking / Fight / Jessica Nigri

      by , 12-22-2015 at 10:14 AM
      I went to bed around 23:10 and spend the next ±30 minutes reading. Woke up around 08:00 and went back to bed, but couldn't really sleep. It's now 10:00.

      It's daytime. I'm in the car with my aunt and my mom. My mom is the one who is driving. We're in a parking lot and she's about to park, but she keeps messing up. There are parking spaces close to the water. The only thing separating the parking spaces from the water is a sort of sidewalk which is elevated. Eventually I get out of the car and I have a look. No wonder my mom can't manage to park. She's been trying to park perpendicular to the sidewalk, but the parking spaces (marked by white lines) are parallel to the sidewalk. Though that's only in one specific area, because a bit further there are perpendicular spots as well. I tell my mom I'll park the car. I aim for the perpendicular parking spot. My mom tells me to back it up far, until my back wheels are on the sidewalk. Are you crazy?! No way I'm gonna do that. That's scary as shit. I might drive the car into the water.

      I'm in my mom's living. I'm with my little brother and his dad. My brother is laying in the corner of the big, black couch. His dad is standing on the couch, sort of hovering over him. He's either about to or he has already hit my little brother. I don't intent to let this happen. I consider my options. I can fight him now that I'm also an adult, but I might have to be careful with my knee. I consider the idea of getting a knife from the kitchen and just stabbing him instead.

      Jessica Nigri
      I'm in my room at my mom's house. I don't know where I see it exactly, but there's a picture of Jessica Nigri, with on her right a girl with a lot of tats. I'm whatsapping with one of my best friends and he comments that the tatted girl is only 14. I have a hard time believing it given her figure and the amount of tats she has. I think back to a joke someone once made. "If there's grass on the field, play ball". I'm not sure if I make that joke myself. The sight of Jessica induces a lust in me and I consider looking up some porn. No! I'm on this nofap challenge so I can't. Ah does it really matter?

      I've just arrived at the toilet in my mom's house. I pull down my grey boxershort and sit down. I can clearly see a few tiny holes in it while pulling it down. Damnit. I look into the toilet bowl while sitting down. I notice that I have cum. Without me even doing anything? Wow.

      » I have my iPhone in my hand. I want to use Google Translate, but it requires a lot of actions to get to the point where I can actually type the word I wanna translate. I assume this is because my classmate logged into his Google account on my phone.

      » I'm in a house with my housemate and a bunch of other people. Lipbalm is being passed around. We all gotta put it on as we're gonna share some glasses with each other and it would be dirty to do so without lipbalm. I hate lipbalm. I don't like the feeling of it. I think at some point I can feel it on my lips.
    15. #59: Swinging / Riva / Thesis

      by , 12-20-2015 at 10:03 AM
      I went to bed around 23:30, but couldn't fall asleep until at least 01:00. I'm not sure anymore when I woke up, I think it was around 07:00 or 08:00. It's now 09:50.

      I think this wasn't a dream, but more like leading up to a dream. I was laying in my bed and suddenly I could feel the world swinging back and forth, as if I was laying in my hammock. The swinging became more violent and I realised that I was about to WILD accidentally. I told myself to remain calm to not destabilise anything and to keep my mind sharp. The swinging decreased and I think I fell asleep without becoming lucid.

      I'm sitting on the backseat of a car. I think my mom is the one who is driving. We're in a city and it's already dark outside. Despite me being in the backseat, I appear to have some control over the car. We reverse into a parking space and then drive off in the opposite direction. For some reason I had to do it like this. It had something to do with that I'm the king of Riva [a kingdom in the book I'm reading] and the resources of the kingdom. I'm not the character that is actually the king though, I am myself. I mess around with the navigation, trying to get a route. It tells us to take a right soon. We decide to take a left instead, as on the right there is a canal.

      I'm at my mom's house. For no apparent reason I walk through the kitchen to the front door and open it for a moment to stare outside. It's daytime. Down below [my mom's house is on the 2nd floor] I see one of my university lecturers, Tim. I assume he has just parked his car. He waves at me and I wave back. I also see my mom who has just parked her car, but we don't make eye contact. I go back inside and panick slightly. I totally forgot I would have an interview with my lecturer. I need to get out of these clothes and into something presentable. I don't know where I pull them from, but I put on some jeans instead of whatever I was wearing (sweatpants?). The house also needs to be cleaned, it's a mess. There's no way I can do all this in the one minute it takes Tim to get up here. I decide to focus my efforts on the kitchen. I clearly see a q-tip on the floor, which I throw into the trash. At some point Tim is there. I throw a pile of clothes from some chairs and we sit at a kitchen table that's not there in reality. Though we both recognise that another lecturer is my thesis supervisor, we discuss my thesis so far. He talks about my research objective, calling it too technical and saying I should focus more on the policy side. I tell him that's what I'm doing right now, now that I'm making a new draft proposal. I laugh a small nervous laugh. My forehead is sweaty. I use a grey towel to wipe the sweat off.
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