rshort1202

I am outside, I think by the river walk. I am walking along and above the river as quite a few people float down it. I know a few of the people floating. The river has been fairly mellow, but I see that just ahead it becomes turbulent, steep, and rocky. The water is violently sucked through narrow openings in the dark rock, and I get really scared for a moment, thinking its too late for them to get out of the water and so they’ll be swept away. I then see some sort of tube that they are able to crawl down. It’s not as steep as I thought either, so they can make it safely. I am now down by the water. A portion of it is covered by a bridge or some other wood that’s only a foot or to above the surface. I get into the water and the resulting cool shade. There are some school aged kids in here. There’s a slight rapid and they’re jumping/doing tricks down it. I make my way closer to the edge, moving a fishing line or string of some sort out of the way. Suspended on it is a small creature or two, or the remnants thereof. It’s slightly uncomforting. I don’t jump, but I slide down the rapid. I’m now in a flat section that I think is the end of the river. I think it is the end because in a few yards it seems to start to drain into the ground below. Water coming from the other direction meets it and drains too, in a slight whirlpool. There are two guys (in red shirts?) standing by it.



I have been asleep and dreaming when I briefly awaken. I’m just awake enough to be conscious of it, though my eyes are still closed and I’m still lying still. The image I’m remembering of the dream is of an older, bearded man’s face (older, but not too old, long hair and beard coarse and mostly brown, but with some gray). I recall this image and try to make it seem real, and it starts to pull me back into the dream state. My body starts to tingle and feel like it’s floating. I hear some sort of static/whooshing sound. I see a hypnagogic montage of whitish and wispy outlines of faces against black. It feels like I might be out to enter back into the dream, but I never do, the awareness returning to my body.

I am outside, on some seaside cliff. It is dark out, but there is enough moonlight to sense the colors of things and to see the sea gently churning below. I can see the dark mass of shapes floating atop, swaying with the waves. I assume that they are sea turtles. Now, I am in the water, swimming alongside a girl about my age or a little older who seems familiar. These creatures are close, larger than I thought, and seem to have thinner bodies and longer limbs than turtles. The current seems to keep me right close to this girl and the creatures. It is now made known to me that these are not turtles but some kind of frog. For whatever reason, I do not like this. I express this and try to swim away. We end up standing on the fine sand beach.

I am riding my bike up to a lake. From my current perspective, the lake looks small (it reminds me of the bike trail up the side of Fallen Leaf Lake), but when I get up closer to it it looks larger. I think it’s Tahoe. I look to my left and see Dad amongst some people on the fairly long and slightly inclined beach. I ride past him just a little bit, so I can turn back and ride straight down at him in an attempt to startle him. I do so, the sand ultimately stopping my momentum right by him, though I don’t know if it startles him. We end up getting into the water. I still think it’s Tahoe, but it almost looks more like the ocean. It is shallow for a long ways as we wade out. At one point I have my head underwater and am seeing two fish. They are fairly large and an aquatically metallic dark grey with specks of gold or another similar, lighter color. There is a small beak or some sharp protrusion on their faces. I don’t think they’re entirely malicious, but I do keep my distance from them. I surface and tell Dad “tiger head sharks.” We now see the water ahead of us a ways is a much darker blue, so we stop. I then hear what sounds like running or draining water and then see water ahead of us slowly moving. It draws back, increasing in speed, before swelling into a sizable wave. It is white-capped before even reaching us, so I simply plug my nose and prepare to ride it out. It breaks on us, more gently than anticipated, and I let it carry me underwater almost all the way to the shore.

I am driving with Makayla and have parked in some small, exposed, and slightly elevated lot. The low walls around are tan and look to be adobe or stucco. I am going to go into a store while she waits in the car. This ‘store’ looks antiquated and like it’s from a different country. It’s made of the same material. It has dirt floors and apparently not much else. I am carrying some sort of red, woven material that folds like a windshield sun screen. It seems worn and is slightly torn in the middle. I think I’ll pick up a case of beer while I’m here. I have now ended up out on the street. It’s busier out here and looks like it might be India. I’m looking for somewhere and can’t find it, when I run into Aly. We look at the map on my phone as she tells me directions. It’s right by where I came from, so I’m not sure how I missed it. This area and its few buildings are built into a slight hill. There’s also a fairly large river running besides and under the streets. Brenton is swimming in it. I think Kassidy is here too. I get into the river too. It is wide and seems very deep. It is not exactly clear, but it doesn’t feel or look dirty. It has a fairly strong current and only a few inches between it and the road it flows under. Brenton easily flows with it, but when I get in, the current and small space to pass through almost catch me off guard. I then relax and start floating. The underside of the road looks more like a small cavern. I am now on the other side and start climbing up a dark stone carving of a gargoyle I think. It’s sloped, but I manage to hang on. I then jump off and bounce on the water a few times and never actually go under. Kat comments on it from above.

I am with Melissa at Harry’s house (it doesn’t really look like his house, but it is large and opulent). We’re going to stay the night here. Melissa leans close to me and tells me she wants to take a bath. It does sound nice. I tell her there is a hot tub outside. Rocio now comes over and says that the bath here is not good - that it’s dirty or something (I’m not sure if she heard us or if it was coincidence). I’m now thinking about where we’re going to sleep. There’s a huge tan couch in this room and a large, empty bed in another room. I wonder if we’ll have to sleep separately, but don’t think so. I think I’m going to ask somebody about the sleeping arrangements, but it’s late enough to not really matter because probably no one else will show up here, and everyone who is here will be asleep now or shortly. I do pass a room and see Rocio and Jim Fry sitting in the large, tall bed. Jim is fixing or moving her shirt by her left breast. In another room, Dad and Harry are sitting in a vast bed, both texting. I notice a TV high up on a wall that is turned on. Marilyn is in a wooden chair against a wall a ways back from the TV. She is facing it, but it looks like she might be asleep.


Mom is driving me (and maybe also Melissa) to the place where she grew up. This two lane highway leads to a lush and rocky coastal point. I think we go past it and come back or something else unnecessary. We are here now, by some docks and a small building or two. I start swimming. I then pull myself up onto the dock; it’s slightly difficult. Tylar is doing the same and having the same struggle. Now Mom goes into a men’s bathroom after two guys come out of it. I see the women’s bathroom door is closed; this must be why she isn’t using it. I, after waiting a little bit, am about to go use the bathroom, then remember that she went in there.


I am with Melissa in what seems to be a building with a very high ceiling. We are climbing up very steep steps/stairs on the side of a huge refrigerator? Others are doing the same thing; we start climbing faster towards the top and are the first to summit. I am now halfway back down, but over the floor, suspended by a rope? There are ready to eat pizzas set out down there. John Blomquist is down there and I’m trying to get him to get a pizza up to me. He doesn’t, and I end up on the ground anyway. We start talking, and he seems a little intoxicated. I imagine things from his state right now. There is a shelf of alcohol here there are little tear shaped bottles of wine with plastic labels over the whole bottle. I see they are 19% alcohol and think it’s a fairly large portion for that ABV.

I am going on a hike in some hills (it seems like the area up above Dad’s house and also familiar from another dream?). I think there’s something about taking Melissa or wanting to take her but not wanting it to be too steep or too long for her. At the top of the hill it levels out and seems to be a large, wide open area up here. To my left, there is an incut with pretty tall rock walls and a waterfall cascading straight down, about 20 feet back. There are a few other people here, walking around and looking. I don’t remember this waterfall being up here. On the horizon, I can see more small and long waterfalls and pools of water. I move my position and they disappear like an illusion.

There is a lake, fairly small but very long. The scenery is like that of Frenchmans lake. I am swimming and swimming faster than is humanly possible. I make it to the far side of the lake. There are what seem like the cargo compartments of semi trucks? that I climb on top of. It seems they’re at the end of an ocean? (it seems really calm). It seems to be twilight. I think I’m going to jump into the water.

I am outside, on some fairly large dock (by the ocean, I think). It wraps around a building and has a few extensions for boats to moor. I attach a long mop head to a pole, dip it off the side and into the water, and start mopping. I go in long, vertical rows. A slightly older and shirtless man is walking this way, so I leave room for him to get by. I believe that the water has been dosed with LSD, and so too will be everyone what now comes into contact with the mopped deck. It occurs to me that I’ll become dosed, as I’m barefoot and walking where I’ve mopped, but I don’t really mind.

I have gone to see Tess for a tattoo. I’m going back to her (like she is Lisa) since I got my first from her. Inside, I am sitting at a counter by a window (it resembles a barber shop counter and seats). Dad is here with me. I am getting the tattoo on my right foot - the same Pink Floyd symbol I already have? It doesn’t turn out too well; it is too long and thin, as well as misshapen, on top of my foot. There’s a line running horizontally along my foot also. She is done and is going to charge me, but I think about asking if she can redo it. I don’t though, and pay the $58? With my card. I figure the tip at $6 and add 8 and 6 to get 14 to carry over on the addition. I’m thinking I could still get the tattoo altered/covered up. I’m also thinking about getting the number 1 in the same place Makayla has her tattoo. It has some significance. I also think about getting it on my ankle/outside of my leg to see if it really does hurt. I tell Dad to get a tattoo and he kind of laughs and says no.



I am filling up a large bathtub. It seem to be in a room and set into the ground. It’s probably bigger than some pools. It overflows into the room. The water is not all that hot; I can only feel heat from the water currently coming out below the water level. Melissa is here, and I tell her she can get in with me.

I am at a Dead and Company show with Dad and one other guy, probably a family friend. The venue is on a grassy and sandy slope down to the ocean. Down towards the bottom of the slope, I can see the off-white top of the tent (kind of like Shoreline) in which they’re playing. Most of it is hidden by the incline. At times, I can see the band, but it is intermittent for whatever reason. There are also waves breaking that make their way up the slope and I think into the tent. I end up briefly talking with someone I know, before making my way down the slope. The band has started, and I dance as I walk. I think a few people look at me, but they are smiling. I’m by the tent now, and it looks more like a small seaside bar or café. You can walk right into it. Some people are doing just that, but they’re getting kicked out, as they are too close to the band or too much of a nuisance. The atmosphere other than that is very laid back. The band, in a single small room, laughs and chats while tuning up between songs. I think the drum kit is in a room separate but still connected to the other. Bill Kreutzmann is here, but he is just hanging out while another, older man plays the drums. It seems to me that Bill is unable to play tonight for whatever reason. I start talking with this other drummer, but it ends up being me talking to Bill, with him either on the drums or right by them. For a moment, I’m self conscious of taking up time if they’re playing music, but they’re taking a while between songs anyway. I ask Bill, prefacing the question with me knowing that it sounds like a typical fan thing to stay, how he would feel about playing Liberty. I am self conscious of my voice as I am speaking. He looks as if he’s really thinking about it. I mention how it would be fitting since it’s so close to the 4th of July. I also wonder if they’d play it mid-set or for the encore. Bill says he’s not sure, because he never really got the pace of the song and his playing was never really coherent on it. I think of versions I’ve heard and guess I could see it. He tells me that’s why they started playing [something with a longer name] in ‘94 and ‘95. This song is, I think, similar to Liberty in tempo and lyrical theme. I nod, thinking of my notes of shows, not sure I’ve ever actually heard it. I think he sees the uncertainty in my nod and briefly wonder if he’s thinking that I’m not that versed in the music, but I know I’ve listened to a fair amount of their shows in that era. (Whatever the name of the song was, it’s not an actual song they’ve done).

Makayla is sitting in some open type area that seems like a pier. It is a bench type seat that seems to be right above some shallow water. The water extends a ways under the covering. It is fairly dim. By her is a large case of beer that has different slots for the different types. I think it has cans and bottles. She is opening a stout bottle and pouring it into a glass. I try it and tell her it is too cold and needs to be warmer. Surprisingly, she agrees with this. I want to have my own, so I open and pour a bottle, but it is the wrong color - a hazy orangey yellow. I see that this is some IPA with a blue label with a fish on it. It is good though, and I am still going to finish it. Later? I am looking for Makayla. I walk down to a row of houses from which I can see the ocean right behind. I am going to go between two houses, but see that it is still pretty much their yard and that there are some people out. I end up seeing Makayla through the screen window of a brown RV that is also close to the ocean. I look up to the window above me and talk to her a bit.



Melissa has on a floral dress and apparently nothing on under it. She has crawled onto me with a certain degree of fervor and is riding me ‘in reverse’. It’s a very nice moment. The Grateful Dead is on in the background; they’re playing an early (1974) They Love Each Other. After a few lines, he stops singing while the music continues, as if he has forgotten lyrics. I think I was the one singing and couldn’t remember any further?

I am in a room that has a pool or multiple pools. One of them is pretty crowded. I am now sitting in it though, with Veronica (from high school). She’s wearing a Grateful Dead tie dye and is sitting a little too close to me. She is also turned towards me and is not so subtly coming onto me. I’m not very comfortable with it.

I am looking at a map that must be on a computer (it looks like Google Earth) with Melissa. I start zooming in on Nevada, and we can start to see streets and buildings while the whole country is still in frame. I continue zooming, trying to pull the northwest portion into focus. There is a street that seems to transverse just about the whole state. As I get closer, lines of houses along the road pop onto the screen. Some of them are in pairs, facing each other and diagonal to the road. Melissa says something about it being by her neighborhood. I scroll a little to the left, and we see on the map an image of someone walking. I get closer, and we see that it is Melissa. She is wearing her work smock. I think this must’ve been when she was still walking to work (She never has, though).



I’m outside in a back or side yard? seated in chairs with Dad, Jon, and another. We are talking about beer; Jon mentions a [some flavor: peach?] ale. I think it sounds good. It is dim/dark out.



There is some type of long and thin dock. At the end of it, I have dropped something into the water. It is deep, but not too deep - 10 feet? It is cold though, so I wouldn’t want to submerge myself. I end up prodding some pole down and only needing to extend my arm into the water a little bit to retrieve this blue mop head?

I am outside somewhere that looks very familiar - very similar to Frenchmans. There are three lines of people, with about 20 or less in the largest line. I get into the ‘Lovebug’ line and none of the people my age in it look familiar. Someone clarifies that we have ‘moved up’ to Fireflies, so I move over. The lines now proceed up a moderate hill on an old, overgrown dirt road. I am wearing pants and long socks. The socks are kind of annoying on my ankles and the pants are hot and not giving me as much flexibility as I’d like. Someone walking with me makes a comment about them taking us on a strenuous walk. I don’t think it’s bad, but as I look at the incline and overgrowth, I could see how it would be for someone not used to it. We’re now reaching a crest in the hill and a building up here. I end up in this building - a bar and grill or something - with Dad. We’re seated at a table close to the corner and the bar, and we’re going to try a beer here. A lady comes over, I think we need a little longer, then it takes a while for her to come back. Looking out the window, I think about how there’s still a little ways to go. I am now back outside and walking. I’m with Jon, and we’re on more flat but forested terrain. It is greener and almost more inviting. The air is cooler and it is more dim and not as exposed. There is also a small river up here. I think there may also be a house, as Jon is saying and keeps saying something about ‘Jim’. He also keeps saying something about a spider (the image in my head is a large, black one, maybe a black widow). There are multiple wooden bridges across this river as we move onward. They are dark wood pieces placed parallel with the river, creating a flat bridge with supports every few pieces. When I watch Jon walk over some of them, the pieces move, swiveling, like a bead on a necklace. He’s been fine so far, but when he jumps onto one of the bridges, quite a ways from the bank, the pieces give way, causing his legs to slip through and him to be caught on one of the supports. He does have a grasp, but appears mostly stuck. I end up by him (in the water?) and am going to help him up. He places a small, circular, water-logged piece of meat onto the wood and then proceeds to clamber out of the water that seems turgid and turbulent yet somehow still.


I am outside somewhere that seems like a college campus or some other communal area. It seems slightly dim out. I have a pack of cigarettes and am smoking one. Others here are doing the same. I hold it between my middle and index fingers, noticing that everyone else does too. I think Niki is here. This carton is overly large and light blue. The inside slides open, revealing the cigarettes that also seem too large and like they’re made of plastic. I smoke one down, self conscious of my aggressive in and exhales, and want another, ashamedly. I think I smoked it too far? and it felt like the soft plastic piece sort of broke off when I got to the end. I think I now go somewhere with Niki - though it feels not as if we’re going together - but simply to the same place at the same time. Chelsea is here. It is brought up how she’s all but kicked a heroin habit, but is about to take it up again. We try to dissuade her, but she is blank, resolute, inconsolable. It is brought up where she would find the substance, and they say you need only follow this street. My gaze follows it down. It’s well known that it’s not the best place, and must be known for a prevalence of the drug. I think it’s residential, though it seems dirty and desolate out here.


I am outside and moving through some dirt trail between houses in a fairly rural neighborhood (almost like Dad’s). It seems I cover a lot of ground too quickly, almost like I’m watching it happen, instead of actually walking or running. I come to a straight-away that ends in a left turn that dead ends at the side of a house. On top of the path is a dilapidated train track. It follows the straight-away but is a few feet/a body’s height off the ground when it rounds the corner. I wonder how I am going to move along this, as it twists right before the house and may be incomplete in a section. The wall that the track runs into is a neutral color (light blue/grey?) and is slightly aged and worn and bare except for one large window. Through the window I see a partially drawn curtain and two chairs. I can hear people moving about talking inside, and these people are moving out of this house. It’ already pretty bare, but I start moving cups and other everyday items off a shelf. I think the people here don’t know that I am here? I now start moving stacks of DVDs (the ones we have at Mom’s, I’m pretty sure).



Analysis:

Later today, I go on a walk with Mom, on which we seem to come to some realizations about the first and third dreams from last night. What prompts these realizations is the sighting of a small bridge being constructed in a front yard. I find this significant, as the bridge as of yet only consists of the support pieces. I liken this to the recounting of my dream bridge and its support pieces and other swiveling pieces. I tell Mom that this dream involved multiple bridges over water and Jon jumping onto one, only to become stuck and in need of my assistance. I find it necessary to detail the background to this dream having any significance, that being me viewing the movie Hereditary on Saturday night and consequently contemplating a séance of my own with a plausible intention being contact with Opa. mom and I agree on the bridges, water, Jon, and my helping Jon all being symbolic in strict relation to Opa and his passing. Mom is the one what mentions that Jon was the one not present and therefore behind in coping with the situation. I seem to be helping Jon in this process and to me it seems to be because of my recent inclinations towards the idea of performing a séance to contact Opa. i believe the bridges are direct symbols of the ‘bridge’ to the ‘other side’. As I write this I begin to experience chills when contemplating the ‘turgid and turbulent yet somehow still” water, probably because it represents what the symbolic bridge physically bridges. Is probably significant that Jon surmounts the bridge. I am unsure of the piece of meat, as well as any meanings ‘Jim’s house’. During a pause in writing this, currently being unsure of the presence of ‘Jim’ and the spider, I go to the garage. Kneeling down by the fridge (which is right where the Black Widow used to be) I get a pre-recorded phone call in which the voice tells me his name is Jim. i immediately think it’s odd that it’s a Jim, but it isn’t until I’m recounting to Mom that I got a phone call from a Jim that it hits me that it was right by where we had the black widow, the one from the dream. Later on, still unfinished with this analysis, I text Kat telling her briefly what happened and asking if she’s had anything happen that has to do with Opa. She tells me a little while ago she had a dream of him in a silver Subaru, then she mentions how he is probably wishing he could’ve been at the graduation. It then hits me that the very beginning of the dream is probably a representation of the graduation. In it, I say ‘moved up’, which directly relates to Opa, while the whole scene can stand for Makayla’s graduation. As of now, it seems that the annoyance of my long socks and pants is the only part without apparent symbolism. As Mom and I started discussing the bridges, I realized that the train track in the third dream bears much resemblance to this image of a track or some sort of conveyance with missing or otherwise inoperable pieces. I believe this represents the contact or attempt at contact with Opa. The train tracks are an overt reference to Opa’s involvement with the V&T as well as a visual metaphor. The neighborhood is significant as well. I also feel that the tracks dead-ending in the house seems to be significant, as the house is another symbol for Opa or for the ‘other side’. The window conveys pretty much the same meaning, and the two empty chairs do not feel arbitrary. Mom mentions the two chairs that were always in Opa and Oma’s living room, and though that is true, the chairs in this dream were wooden and straight-backed, facing each other slightly, seemingly symbolizing conversation. I think it is symbolic that I never really see the people but only hear them (an image of the ‘spirit world’ or the impression of people contacting it) and also that they are moving out of this house. After all of this, I am left with the feeling that these dreams did not by chance occur so noteworthy and significant-seeming directly after my inclination towards conducting a seance. I with impressed with their impression, considering my lack of detailed dreams for quite a while, and believe that alone makes them significant. And then the sighting of the partially constructed bridge was the conduit for the deeper, real meaning. Every association produced varying levels of chills, which is enough for me to know that I have found the dream’s real ‘meaning’. I believe the dreams were some spiritual connection to Opa or an affirmation towards the idea of contact, with the same feeling of knowing I had about the dream in which he came into Starbucks when I was working, though not quite as understated.

I am in a fairly large subterranean cavern. It is very dark, with the dark stone walls and the dark water of indeterminable depth. Somehow, I am afloat on the surface of the water (whether by myself or on top of something). I pull out my phone to use its flashlight, but the screen’s luminescence is enough to enable to water, stone, and sparse vegetation along the walls to come eerily into view. I am slightly upset about this, as I wanted to see it first or only by the flashlight? Now, I am by a stone wall. It is featured enough to enable me to start ascending it, and I do so. The ridges are just close enough and just good enough, though they are a little small to be completely secure footholds. Still, I am too high to easily come back down, so I continue to the top. I climb up and over and am on a stone walkway traversing this wall. I follow it and find myself inside of a room (it looks like the office at Dad’s house? though blended into this area). Makayla is here, seated at a desk. I find it bizarre that I came up from a subterranean cavern and found myself here.