• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    DarkestDarkness

    Last edited 10/02/2021

    These days I tend to write mostly on my phone's DJ initially but I tend to go through periods where I alternate where I'm DJing.




    I am writing the dreams almost as I would if I were writing only to myself. The only exception is that in this DJ I only name people by their initials at most or a nickname's initial, unless it's relevant to the dream context, since I still like the dreams to be understood/readable by anyone; even if you don't know who my friends are or people I know by name, I still want you to understand the immediate contexts as much as possible.

    Comments on the DJ are welcome. See my dream signs in the general notes under my profile avatar on the sidebar. Note, I don't update the dream signs section very much anymore. Over the last two or three years I've come to realise that some symbols are quite constant but many change too much or are just variations off a theme, so it has stopped making quite as much sense to keep a long-term list of what the signs are.

    Click to see all DJ entries with images that I made for them

    Click to see all DJ entries that may involve dream-like experiences but are not technically dreams

    I don't often make images for dreams because I've usually forgotten most of the details I wanted to depict.


    1. cccxxii. Discord dramas, Abandoned power plant, Village stroll, Film noire-ish

      by , 09-06-2021 at 01:15 PM
      29th August 2021

      Some in-line notes/thoughts.

      Fragment:

      (last part of a dream)

      Not sure where I am, some house. H is here and some client of his. There is some upset because of people doing some kind of eBay boycott or slandering. I feel I know exactly why; in Discord, talking to A and G and some other furries, another (dream-generated) furry called "Daster" is mentioned as having made a journal about eBay shenanigans. But reading what Daster said, it seems to read fine actually and it's more like others didn't read it thoroughly and have blown it out of proportion.

      (on waking from this, I wondered why I didn't consider this a dreaming situation while dreaming)

      Fragment:

      (some early dream)

      In an old and abandoned building. It's an abandoned nuclear power plant. Me, H and DH (who we were recently introduced to in WL) are here, I think trying to get the power plant working again. Some circuit boards in a control room of sorts seem to be damaged? Other mechanical bits need replacing, overall. DH plays around with one of those chunky armoured cables we saw in A's garage while we were away. DH draws arcs with it and stuff, across some of the control room machinery.

      The electric arcs are just barely visible (making me think of X-Ray radiation being at play) and they are long and a very faint but somewhat bright light blue colour. Something happens and an arc strikes all three of us. I feel dizzy at first. Then we all start experiencing psychotropic symptoms. I start to trip, basically. I start seeing colours more vividly and my field of view starts distorting.

      Fragment:

      I'm with H in a village, it's daytime, either cloudy or sunny. We walk past a house that has some interesting rendering. Then I see there's this huge Viking-like church. I ask H what's it like inside and he says he's never been in. I think earlier we are in a town much like my old home town, but with much taller buildings. I remember being atop one of these buildings at one point (looking down?). Things are trippy at some points, like an Escher painting kind of trippy, with forced perspectives and things like that.

      Fragment:

      A dream bit with a film noire feel to it but not actually in greyscale. Not sure that I'm even a character at all. Some guys get a mobile call. They're in a busy path by an equally busy canal. New York accents or something? Something stereotypical and period-like anyway. On the phone, they're discussing a paid assassination job. The seeming protagonist is trying to be tactful with the discussion in public, unlike his colleague was when he had a turn on the phone. There's a scene that I think is supposed to be comical or juxtaposing because this heavy and serious discussion passes right in front of a children's choir practising on the canal and as they pass them, the main character alludes to this in a humorous way that "disguises" the assassination conversation as he goes past.

      Scraps:

      Very vague recall of making an abstract art piece and uploading it semi unfinished.



      Notes:

      - I am not sure why the first dream fragment might have manifested, but probably a mix of worries. I have never encountered anyone by a username of "Daster" and when I looked it up, I couldn't really find anything relating to that dream's content.

      - In a more recent dream than in this entry, I had another dream where there was concern over non-visible radiation. I think this is often a sub-conscious worry of sorts, not strictly just about radiation, also about other non-visible agents that might cause harm and that is to say, such things as viruses, something else that has recently appeared in dreaming.

      - Strangely, the dreaming for this day seemed to have a "trippy" factor as quite a prominent feature. I don't recall ever having "tripped" in that sense, although I can imagine to some extent what it might be like, but I am not sure what brought this on as a dreaming thing.

      - The Viking-like church is probably both a residue of a Minecraft town we'd been building and of an actual church we recently visited that had a similar feel, in some respects.
      -- The village area we were in was similar to several different local ones we've been to, for church-related stuff.
    2. cclxxiv. A dark world and failed murder attempts

      by , 05-26-2021 at 11:21 AM
      26th May 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm playing my dwarf paladin. I'm in a dark and gloomy world, not quite like the game and not like waking life. This area is like a volcanic area, but mostly ash. It rains and I feel wet, it's a heavy drizzle. I meet other WoW players, at one point another paladin like mine and on inspecting his gear I see he has an impossible five thousand healing power, but I'm just amazed by it. I take a screenshot to show HW later. I wander off in some direction, with some sub-conscious purpose.

      Later on in a different place I meet some furries, apparently some friends of H's friend M who is also in the dream in some way. Other ones are random M/M and I meet these in a city of some sort and as I recall dream reality gets a bit wonky here (phasing, incorrect perspective perceptions, etc). This is the brightest part of the dream as I recall it. I feel I'm just myself at this point, not any other specific character or form.

      Some other bit is dystopic, again very gloomy, cold atmosphere. There's a building, I'm inside. It looks basic, large tiles for floor, concrete walls, possibly barred or broken windows. It has several floors, maybe three, with a central stairwell or something? I am with a group of people, possibly one person from waking life. A man enters the building at some point and he tries to murder someone in front of all of us, using some kind of crude slingbow thing that can throw anything at high velocity. The man is white, tall (more than one might expect) and slender, dark haired (a deep black) and slightly hunched. I see through his eyes and feel what he feels at some point, the sling thing feeling quite rubberband-like; he fails at every attempt, becoming visibly frustrated and being laughed away by the rest of us. He was trying to murder someone specific in the midst of us, also a man I think.



      Notes:

      - The dream was incredibly long but I couldn't maintain recall for long enough after making myself more awake.

      - My initial thoughts are that this entire dreamworld reflects in some way how I look at the world sometimes in waking life. There was little order, it was anarchic and dystopic. Much of it was grey and desaturated. The middle part of the dream was probably the brightest and most colourful, but still it wasn't quite so much and there was an element of lacking order.

      - There was a pervasively blue/cold light to most of the dream. It was only during the M/M section that there was some kind of bright sunrise in the distance.

      - My paladin character is likely just a reflection of waking life but it does make a strong contrast to the otherwise desaturated and lifeless setting of the dream.

      - The tall man is probably some shadow aspect. A murder of distance, to my mind, is immediately associated with fear of contact and fear of personal involvement.
    3. ccxxxi. A town fair

      by , 02-22-2021 at 01:57 PM
      22nd February 2021

      Dream:

      I'm in a hotel or apartment building. I'm on a floor above ground level but don't know which; I am walking towards a lobby-looking hall, with elevators and I want to go to the ground floor. There's this group of four black guys in their late teens, they seem to be shadowing me but I don't let it bother me even though they look like they could easily be trouble if they wanted to.

      I let them know I've seen them by looking at one of them in the eye, through a mirror showing us all. The mirror is between the elevator doors. None of us speak, that I can recall and they're just doing their own thing behind me at any rate, some kind of non-verbal communication.

      (recall gap)

      I'm outside, in the streets of a town. It's night time? I have awareness of Covid, but I'm not wearing a mask. It bothers me, but for some reason I make no effort to find one. Throughout most of the dream onwards this bothers me a bit on some level.

      At some point I meet up with M, whom I haven't seen in years in waking life. I remember he has a car? Like an SUV or something. There's something about my aunt B too.

      I walk around town, it's a bit like there's some kind of annual fair on. I am finding these little areas where there's some kind of more conventional role playing game involving furries in fursuits. But they look much more realistic, like they're actually their characters. One of them tells me they will actually pay me if I participate in the games wearing a fursuit myself. I think to myself I wouldn't mind, but I don't have one and would likely end up feeling embarrassed anyhow.

      (recall is vague for the following two paragraphs)

      At one point I'm climbing some stone stairs. It's sort of outdoors, but under some kind of natural rock formation? There's these two statues... I've seen them elsewhere in the dream. They look like they're flowing with some magical energy, it's a deep blue colour. The statues are damaged, incomplete. I remember thinking they're supposed to be in some museum somewhere, but this is actually their original location. This is a different place from the town? In Russia somewhere, I somehow understand. This is where they were first discovered.

      The statues are from ancient Greece, but from a more mythological period or something. They look like the lower bodies of some serpentine creatures, scaly. The heads are missing and one statue practically only has the very bottom of it left. I remember going past the statues while thinking about the whole thing, then I go up some more stone stairs. There's one of those role playing games again here, I forget what happens but it's some kind of murder mystery and I'm greeted by a furry who is dark and almost crawling at ground level, and he seems eager for me to take part in the game.

      Eventually I come across an attraction which takes place in a castle. I remember telling M I would try it out and that I'd let him know later all about it. You have to queue up for the attraction but initially there's just me and one other person.

      A heavy wooden door opens and allows us in. Inside, I immediately gain a HUD and there's some semblance to Legend of Zelda. I grab a knife, it looks toy-like and oversized somehow. I use it to attack some creatures. I then find a mace, in a similar style. My ally goes first through the next door. A stone armour golem tries to ambush him from behind but I hit it with the mace on the head, making enough noise my ally notices and doesn't get ambushed. We defeat the golem.

      We're now in a big room. It's church-like, cathedral-like, even. There's a Dark Souls feel to it. A boss is in the middle, we try fighting it but it deals a lot of damage.

      (memory intrusion?)

      Something about WoW, a group of players fighting a boss. One player is a monk tanking and rolling around and healing himself but not quickly enough.

      Then, we have eventually lost our battle with the boss in the church-like room. I am outside now and at the queue again? There's a lot more people here waiting this time. They're all younger than me and some look very impatient and like they'd be a bit rude.

      (recall gap)

      I'm on some castellated bit, across from the castle with the game attraction in it. There's other people here too, sat at rudimentary and makeshift artillery things that have a fantasy feel to them. I try one, but it's broken and does nothing. Sunset? I recall artillery from these guns going into the core of the other castle, I remember they were supposedly targetting the boss and providing support this way.

      I forget the rest but the dream ended soon after.



      Notes:
      - I feel the chronology of the dream is messed up versus what it actually was, but I didn't try to fix it.

      - There's something very personal to this dream about the dichotomy of me separating my life into separate organised areas of thought. Yesterday I had been thinking of consolidating some things.
    4. cxcv. Reality editing suite, On a walk with a friend

      by , 12-01-2020 at 06:38 PM
      1st December 2020

      Dream:

      By the end of a dream sequence. I remember some editing interface, like video game authoring tools and sort of in focus, there's a female furry character. A white wolf lady with red-ish accents on the hair on her head. She was part of some kind of animated sign or billboard and had a stylised drawing look to her. I felt curious or interested, but distant in terms of personal connection. I scrubbed through the animation a few times.

      The surrounding area looked like an alleyway of some kind, a street. There were metal-ring fences and such like, some warehouse type buildings. Sunset.

      In the editing interface there was some sort of point and click thing that allowed me to find the source files of textures, sounds, anything really, as long as it was visible in the dream reality and I had the correct and corresponding editing suite module in interface focus.

      (recall gap)

      Near the end of a second dream sequence. I was walking around with JC, from school, in a town I don't recognise. Not dissimilar from the previous area, but morning time instead now. It was an industrial/commercial estate type area and there were covid-related queues for getting into shops. I remember feeling I had no patience for such things (queuing etc) right now. JC was as I remember him; soft face, somewhat short but around the same as me in reality. Perhaps he seemed shorter because he still looked younger.

      We walked past a car stuck in a queue at the entrance to a parking lot area, part of a superstore/shop. It was a blue colour, cerulean like? Like a VW Beetle, but not? JC was in a suit, kind of like JSco might have. He was infantile and yet, mature in some sense. That's how I always felt about him, I now realise.

      I have my casual clothes on. Sweat pants or whatever which I wear both for lounging and for work. Black nylon t-shirt. As we walked, he commented "I want some GTA pussy, you know?". I don't remember replying. Then he continued "It's been a long time."

      His voice didn't sound at all like his actual voice and he spoke in perfect English with none of our native accent. I didn't notice any of this during the dream.

      I remember as we walked along I thought to myself "Great, he's gonna be trying really hard, I'm gonna not be caring and one of these girls will just hit on me instead of him; that would be typical."

      We reached some dead-end looking bit. Concrete-y. Breeze blocks or something like that made up a low wall, damming up earth and whatnot. There may have been a staircase up and through one part. On the top of this low wall, there were heads, some kind of digital representations/avatars or holograms of girls from the neighbourhood and the local school (college/high school). There were a lot of fake blondes? I forget how the heads looked exactly but they didn't seem out of place, somehow. JC sort of inspected each one as we kind of circled around this bit.

      The dream ended soon after, I was woken up by the door.



      Notes:

      - It's possible these were two separate dreams, but I had a feeling they were linked in some sense.

      - JC is one of many friends I had at school that I got along with fairly well, but characteristically, after college I never really heard from him again and he didn't seem too interested in keeping in touch. I remember walking with him in town a few times and having long conversations, probably mostly about games though.

      - Although we shared a common name, physically we were very different and though he wasn't any weaker than me, I always thought he appeared somewhat meek. In this dream he sort of had an aura of over-confidence contradictory to how I knew him, which would have been more over-cautious than anything. In essence, the dream character as a persona was someone else, but took on his physical appearance. In the dream I was my current age, but perhaps with a younger style of thinking.

      - I may have seen a furry character before like the one in the first part of the dream, though I'm not certain if my brain was referencing anything specific. It felt like she was her own original thing, despite what I might consider to be a stereotype representation.
      -- On further thought, I found out about the sub-culture when I was in my mid-teens, which was also around the same time as I knew JC.

      - I don't know what the "GTA pussy" thing was about really, but even in the dream something felt out of place about it. Part of me realised on typing my initial notes that we really have no control over what our friends say sometimes and how we have to just get on and live with it or do something about it and potentially get into a conflict with them.

      - My over-analytical view of this dream is suggesting to me now I should probably try to do some more serious inner work on these subjects.

      Updated 12-03-2020 at 10:30 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , side notes
    5. clxxvii. Unlikely weapon stats, evading hostiles and travelling through space

      by , 10-10-2020 at 12:46 PM
      8th October 2020

      Fragment:


      In space, it looks like Freelancer, kind of. (Like most of my recent Freelancer themed dreams, the scale looked vast and more realistic)

      First I launched from a planet in a system completely filled by a nebula, like Omicron Beta, but not. The star looked dimmed through the clouds as it would in the actual game. I had a complex reputation standing with the factions so when some ships from a hostile faction appeared out of a trade lane, some friendlies immediately started turning red. Soon the whole system was after me and I tried to evade them in the usual ways. There was Rheinland navy in this system.

      I got to a wormhole? Then I'm in a different system. A Sigma type system. There was a large yellow star and some distant planets beyond it, as well as small nebulae and asteroid fields. The background itself was a light blue-grey nebula, but I don't remember the shape of it.

      I can't recall what my ship was like but I was using turret mode at some point to look around while cruising. I used a trade lane eventually but interrupted travel through it, halfway, and then veered off toward a darker area of the system behind an asteroid field. There were TIE fighters? I scanned the ships and saw the weapons were class 3, but somehow had a hull damage stat of around 3.4k. Their lasers were blue and the lasers themselves were classed as pulse-laser guns. I remember going toward a capital ship of some kind and landing on it.

      I got in a control room and remember taking some black gloves, they felt slightly heavy? Thoughts about Darth Vader and his armour. Then some crew landed on the capital ship and got to me and started attacking. An officer of some kind told me I only had a few seconds to live?

      Fragment:

      Reality mixed in with BL. A portal to my place was used or being opened. It was Ar, who had the form of that gecko pokemon, whatever its name is, with a mostly black and red colour scheme.

      Remember talking to him and telling him about the rooms in this in-game place. But I think I was wanting to move my base or something. At some other point some random furries appeared?



      Notes:
      - The unlikely weapon stats for a class 3 weapon could have been a good dream sign/dream indicator but I feel this came about from recently thinking about some of the bigger mods for the game, like TNG.
    6. clxv.

      by , 09-14-2020 at 08:25 PM
      14th September 2020

      Fragment:

      Micro dream about a furry character, either animated or 3D. The character is a female fox or canid of some kind? She runs a shop and some other dream character is meddling inside the shop.

      At night, once the shop is closed, the main character goes out into the streets and skulks in the shadows of some buildings. It's set in a small town or small city. There are white blue-ish light sources which could almost be mistaken as moonlight.

      The character goes around some back alleys and shadows another character, nearly getting caught at some point?



      Notes:
      - I watched the stop-motion film titled "Fantastic Mr.Fox" a few weeks ago, may just be a residue of that.
      - In the dream it was also like I was watching a film, not actively within it, except for the fact that some of the "camera" angles seemed a bit as if I was indeed on the set.
    7. lxvii.

      by , 11-09-2018 at 01:52 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Haven't been so well last couple of days and sleep has been irregular too. Been waking up at normal times but then falling back asleep for too long. Remember some fragments but nearly no detail. Some visual details I remember I just can't put into words very well either.



      Dream Fragment 1:
      Something about some furries, in a town. One of them grew a bit bigger and because of that something happened (like some guy reacted and locked down an area or something?). I remember the group sitting together at a table somewhere, feeling sad.

      Dream Fragment 2:
      Was back at university. Rest of context has completely vanished as I tried to recall more...

      Dream Fragment 3:
      Me and my mom were listening to someone from the US speak on television or something. My mom asked what he was saying. I said "He's... Reading from the book of Apocalypse."

      Dream Fragment 4:
      Some long non-lucid that I don't remember much about anymore, but the dream plot was in some sort of old castle or something and I was going around it with other people. My now waking mind is coming up with Karazhan as a location associated to this dream.



      No notes at the moment, I'm just too tired.
    8. lxvi.

      by , 11-06-2018 at 12:35 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up about 3 times through the morning, between 8:20, the time for my alarm, then at 9 something then at 10:20. Some long-ish dreams but think they've fragmented.



      Fragment 1:
      At a square or cathedral. There with partner (H), something to do with pipe organs.

      Then outside, at the square. Nice cobbles and layout. Remember meeting up with my parents and having them ask why I didn't have a stand here selling old coins; I remember explaining that I'd worked out that the cost to make them look new, plus the cost to rent the space, plus other things I don't remember now, meant that it was far too expensive and not worth it at all. I also remember explaining that I didn't have nearly enough coins to make it worthwhile.

      Then at some version of my childhood home with my parents. At the rear balcony of the flat. Things look blocky like a voxel game. I remember blue leaves and yellow logs. We were on the 6th or 7th floor, judging by the height.

      Fragment 2:
      A friend of ours, M, was buying crap again.

      Fragment 3:
      At some sort of flat. Don't remember what lead up to this scene anymore.

      There was a tongue and lips art sculpture thing on a wall. Then it became a bit more real and I then remember a giant furry outside the flat, peeking in. I remember the fur was white and the eyes were blue. I think it was a girl and she said something.



      Some notes:
      • The appearance of my parents and the questions about the "coin stand", has to do with how they often want me to try and do something else, since they are concerned I won't be able to support myself. This type of appearance in a dream is perhaps validating their concerns in part. When I was awake in bed I remember thinking about carpentry again.
      • Being at the cathedral with H seems to be merely a reflection of recent events, as I help H with pipe organ work.
      • Both the first and the third dreams were a lot longer, and I woke up sweating with the third dream; this has been happening a few times recently where I wake up sweating at about 10:20 with vivid-ish dreams. Generally being too hot is what makes the dreams vivid, as far as I can tell. Unfortunately it also means my mind is a bit more active when I'm actually awake, making it easier to forget details.