Recent DJ Posts

My last entry was a tad more than a month ago. After shifting training methods to work exclusively on the fundamentals, I feared the steady state progress I was currently viewing would slow down momentarily. What I didn't expect was for it to plummet spectacularly. My dream recall took a brake for about a week, wake-back-to-beds were nerve-rackingly difficult to pull off, and for days I could barely get a full night's rest. But through it all I pushed on.

I began building awareness day by day up to this very last week when I saw glimpses of it seeping into my dreams. Were in prior entries I would innocently follow along the story, the last few nights brought questions against the logic behind each dream. Today, I am proud to see things getting back on track, with a new lucid dream. I want to point out I did attain one more lucid dream during my time away from this journal, I simply chose not to share it. I was debating if I should keep this new one to myself as well. The fact is, my dreams haven't gotten any more noteworthy than the rest. I think they've never been as special as other entries I've read around here. There are forty lucid dreams to my name and I haven't been able to go beyond a couple of steps inside, beyond a few seconds at most. I've never talked to anyone in a dream, never known what it feels to fly in a dream, no chance to see or explore, there's nothing. It's frankly demoralizing, more so when I read other people's journey, far more exciting than anything I could hope for, many of them within their first five or ten lucid dreams, some during their first.

I want to share it however, perhaps because there's the possibility of another person like me, who struggles getting their foot through the door once lucid, so that they can see my progress and hopefully learn something of value through this journal. It's not much right now, and I'm honestly expecting nothing changing towards the end of the year. I only hope the amount of practice ends up paying off in the long run. To the dream then:



I was at home standing in front of a window, staring at an empty space. It was dark and most likely raining outside. The lights were off. I kept listening to water running down to the ground on my left. I thought I heard footsteps pacing about farther into the distance. But then, I heard them closer. The air was thicker now, and I sensed danger looming nearby. Expecting an assault or robbery, I immediately shut the window close and put the lock on. I wait. I'm not sure the window was properly closed, so I swing it open and lock it for good only this time, it hits me that this is a dream.

I am dreaming.

I take my eyes off the handle and set on an empty dark space outside. The feeling of danger falls almost directly upon me. I think something will pop out from below that window and jump scare me. I try to calm down. A vibratory force makes its way up against my sides and onto my neck, enough for me to wake up.

Meta:
bedtime: ~1am? (celebration yesterday, and generally messed up day running errands, my schedule was thrown off)
First noticed waking:
out of bed: 9:45am

I have grogginess sufficient to fall back asleep and eventually do, try body scan, mouth & eye relax, visualize quiet scene, river with sounds, lake scene, and start floating in/out of wakefulness


05:55:

+ A garage area roll-down door is closing, there is a guard stationed there, I block the door at the last minute and crawl underneath. There is a whole gang of bad guys in there and I've infiltrated. I have a key and mess with the floor-locking mechanism on the door. I get up and start walking resolutely. Bad guys are all around me but are going about there business, ignoring me because they assume I belong. I walk through different rooms & areas (washing machines in one?) and keep walking ahead, not making eye contact, wondering how long this can go on before they discover me.

+ restaurant table woman arrives drops something, should I pick it up as a gentleman would? I dither on the decision

+ moving restaurant table, I go from a multi-person table to a smaller table so as to make room for a larger party at my first table.

+ work setting, woman hears man talking thinks it's bad about her throws a cup of water at him through a hole in the cubical walls, scene shifts to see that guy in his cube, angry and raging about that he just uses that whole to talk to his cube neighbor, he starts ranting about "pubes" and shows his pubes (big bush) to his cube neighbor, keeps ranting "pubes! pubes!"

later:

+ I'm on the downhill slope of FL (neighborhood CH to the left and down) approaching the corner at AV, rolling (ball?) with a friend who is ahead of me, the ball rolls down and to the left on to AV. A bright turquoise blue car (Mercedes?) (the color is really striking and gets my attention, the rest of the dream seems greyscale, it is dark-ish, evening time) drives by me closely on the left, stops, and now comes almost directly at me, I wonder if he's trying to hit me, it seems like it, should I get out of the way? I stand in place and the car's left side (heading up hill now) brushes my left leg. I think the driver is just going to keep coming at me. I see the driver inside the car (light, white/cream colored upholstery) seems to be lying down in the front seat, I see a bottle, I assume he's drunk.

+ (f, vague) feeding the cat? water bowl is dirty with bits of food in it?

+ in PTL, move from MB to S1's room, one guy there, I'm naked, being a bit of an exhibitionist, the other guy pulls his pants down, I toss a wad of paper into the top of his pants like a basketball hoop, want to show it to those around, another guy comes (relative of the first) and first guy mentioned what I did, I think I should get dressed, I pull a pair of rainbow underwear out, rainbow striped shaped like women's bikini bottom, put it on, the size is a bit off, I say "this is a large"

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I'm by Håkanssons and there is a cute girl there. We talk and go upstairs. She turns into a different person and tries to rape me. I succeed in escaping. I jump out of the window, do a backflip in the air and take my Batman gun that shoots a cord unto the building so that I softly land. I am semi lucid because I think this to myself, "I wonder if the dream adjusted the height of the house in order to make my backflip so perfect". I also think about how the cord I shot out moved in a way that's not possible IRL. Later on Håkanssons and the creepy girl stands on a row, the creepy girl has transformed back and is now good. I give her a light kiss on her cheek because she seems sad. She gives me one too. That made her feel better.

Notes: I saw an episode of a serie and there is a girl that is really nice but transforms into a witch and destroys everything sometimes. I also saw the trailer for the new batman movie.

I'm in a house with many stairs. It's a Mario and Bowser house. I know it's a dream but it's very vague. I jump everywhere and there is a hat following me. I talk with Bowser and my brother is also there. My brother and I am in a room alone.

Notes: My brother showed me a Youtube clip of a comedy of Mario yesterday.

I'm by our summerplace's bridge with other people. They are fishing but I don't want to join them. I walk into a different house and talk with some people. They tell me to deliver an important message to a special guy that went fishing. They tell me to say "Alice" to him. I wonder what it means and decide to tell him. I find the guy by the road and tell him that I was supposed to say this to him. He is blonde and very nice looking. He starts to act uneasy and I wonder what the problem is and if Alice has anything to do with this. He tells me that it will be sad for Alice. I ask him if they are the water people who can't control their transformation and hunger for people at night. He confirms and we have to save Alice. I walk back to the bridge. Rebecka from school and Emma from church are there. There is a cat that jumps into the water but its paws get trapped in the small rocks in the water. Everyone is watching the cat, about ten people. Sometimes the head of the cat seems to be under the water for too long but nobody helps the cat. After a while it walks up as if it could have done so the whole time. Emma says that she caught ten fishes and Rebecka says that she isn't going to sleep this night. I wonder if she isn't going to sleep because of the transformation.

Notes: We fished this summer at our summerplace. I saw some cats yesterday.