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    1. Thursday, June 16

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:37 PM
      Iím with Melissa and taking Stella to a pool. It feels like the pool at our complex but a little different. It seems weíre approaching it the same way as we really would, but there is no fence. Right away I notice two guys (one in the regular at work, Blair) and their black and white border collie in the water. Stella doesnít react to it. Now I feel alone or just separate from them. In the pool, which looks like a long oval with a skinny section in the middle that also seems to be a hot tub, I swim and submerge myself. Someone? asks if Iím doing it to get away from everyone. I think to myself that sheís not entirely wrong.
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    2. Wednesday, June 15

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:36 PM
      (fragment) Iím sleeping in a room with Melissa. Itís unfamiliar and the bed feels like itís in an alcove. I wake up and feel like we have fans on and the AC on a very low temperature, so I ask if we can turn it off.

      *Iím sure this is from sleeping in a much colder temperature than we have been, especially with the covers coming off of me at times.
      Tags: sleeping
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    3. Monday, June 13

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:33 PM
      Phil Lesh is showing me a round trip route on a map. The route is marked in red or yellow and passes through what looks like Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming (possibly including Colorado and Utah). I think it sounds like a fun trip and really consider driving it. He says there are two options through the state at the end - I see the line snaking up the full color topographical map. He says the one way is just small towns and Smithís (the store) and the other is scenery. His tone makes the small towns sound unpleasant and I think Iíd want to go the way with the scenery, envisioning both.
      Tags: map
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    4. Friday, June 10

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:33 PM
      Iím with either Julia or Jessica or both in some unfamiliar room. It seems more like a motel than a house. Someone (the maintenance guy that lives in the building next to us) starts coming over and I know heís going to get in, in a threatening way. I go around to lock all the doors (the locks look like that on the side door at work). Heís here now and saying something threatening as he tries to force open the locked handle. I watch it bend from the force. Heís inside this room now, facing Jessica and Julia, me facing his back. I watch as he shoots at something (not them) with a tiny black pistol. I think I now run to get a gun, shooting him when I return. He lies face down and I kneel on top to restrain his arms, as heís still struggling. I call out for them to get a gun (I guess Iím not aware that I just had one) so I can finish it. It takes a while, but I think they finally do. I think I shoot him in the head, looking down at the resulting carnage. His body is moved now and I see indentations in the carpet and the spherical silver bullets about the circumference of a quarter within.

      *I canít recall many emotions during the last part of this dream. It seems that what I was doing did not feel wrong, though itís obviously disturbing to write down now.
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    5. Sunday, June 5

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:31 PM
      Iím in a large house on the ocean shore. It is Dadís birthday, but Makayla and I jokingly run away from him when he shows up. He takes it personally and the look on his face says so. Iím going to try to find him a book here to make up for it. This room looks like a large foyer, books lining the top of every wall on a high shelf. They all look like Franklin Library or similar. Some are more ornate than Iíve ever seen. There are a couple of thick Dostoevskys, the binding looking like his portrait in stained glass. I think about getting these for myself. I know that Dad wants [a certain title] that has to do with maritime, so I search for it. I do find the title, but itís combined in one volume with The Red and the Black by Stendhal. I open it to find itís in a weird font that is pre highlighted, I think each character in a different color. I donít like it. I find one more pre highlighted and spiral bound. Again, I donít like it. Al shows up now and offers to help. Looking to the shelves, I tell her Iíve looked through every single title. She hands me a book on the old west as a recommendation. I flip through it and see some familiar figures in the illustrations/photographs, such as Judy Garland as Dorothy. Appreciative, I tell her I will take this one. Now, through a window or open door I see Dad walking along the beach with a beer bottle in hand and talking to himself. It is dark out. Heís sad about us abandoning him and, staggering and slurring, says he is going to see [someone]. I feel really bad about this. Now, Julia is here and it feels late at night. She says something and I say ďthese shrooms are starting to feel goodĒ (I mustíve taken them a bit ago). I go into a room here, hers?, that has a nicely made bed with a fuzzy gray color theme. The rest of the room has the same aesthetic.

      *Melissa asked last night what Iím getting Dad for Fatherís Day and I told her I didnít know. She then brought up Carlosí birthday. I commented on the Franklin Library copy of Ulysses Iím reading and grabbed a Franklin Library copy of Crime and Punishment at work. The things in brackets are specific details present in the dream that Iíve since forgotten.
    6. Saturday, June 4

      by , 06-16-2022 at 09:30 PM
      Iím walking Stella somewhere outside, a fairly wide dirt path, when I pass an older man with his dog, what looks like a retriever. Stella does well with being able to pass the dog without meeting it. There is a culvert off to the side, maybe 8+ feet long. Itís almost filled completely with running water and Stella decides to get into it. In an instant, sheís completely submerged and I can only feel by the pull of the long leash how far into it she is. I initially remain calm, hoping Iíll be able to remain calm, hoping Iíll be able to hold onto the leash until I can just run and grab her on the other side. This then does not feel possible, so I call for help from Dad who is now here. Stella is somehow still being swept down this stream that only seems a few inches deep. It is rocky as well and feels like itís underground, as I run to catch up with her. With all of my might, I eventually do.



      Iím going into a Dead and Company concert with Melissa. The indoor venue seems like something comparable in size to the Reno Events Center. Thereís a simple white folding table in the foyer and some hassle with the middle aged white man in getting our tickets. I succeed in getting them and we go in. Itís close to empty, so we hurry toward the front. Thereís no GA, only seats. When I ask, Melissa says she doesnít care where we sit, which kind of irritates me. At first we go up too high, so we try lower. There are now some people here and we have to squeeze by them in their seats. The band is on the stage now, all unfamiliar except for Bob Weir, the rest seeming much younger. I notice the drummer playing but donít hear any music. Bob is wearing a black cloth face mask which he removes and gives to one of the younger band members to wear. This makes no sense to me but I try to let it go.
    7. 2022-06-16

      by , 06-16-2022 at 08:03 AM
      + escape the firestorm from CH, bank cards, passports
      I'm in CH and I (hear explosions?) and I see a massive firestorm approaching up the hill towards the house. There is no time to take any belongings, I must escape immediately. I run out of the house and higher up in to the hills, hoping that the higher ground will be safe. Walking far away from CH along GPB

      + See CrLe (WFP)'s workspace with a pile of TTL chip boards

      +[f] going somewhere in a large van with a group, I'm in the back seat with tons of room in front of me before the front seats

      later:
      + in a group (at work? seems like a relaxed social situation), we're going out to celebrate my and (my sons? colleague?) birthday together. I'm 40 and he's 25. [Deceased] wife EW makes funny comment about what about when I'm 80?

      +[f] sitting (at desk?) Indian coworker AS ("S") comes up and leans over my garbage can to my left (near my head), I think he's spitting out my gum

      final:
      + sitting along the banks of a river, shallow completely transparent water [DS], some young boy is playing in the water near the shore, he's submerged and holding himself in place against the current with his hands. Then I see a sort of padded construction (like the face rest on a massage table) in front of him that I think allows him to stay in place by letting the current press his face against the pad, this frees his hands. I note my younger son S2 is sitting in the highest position on the steeply sloping bank (eating lunch?), sitting higher up than any other the other people around us. I (write?) a note on white paper and take it in to the river with older son S2, I want to show it to him, I'm closer to the center of the river than the earlier mentioned boy, and position myself alongside him, son S2 is with me and I open up the paper and I want S2 to read it.
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      non-lucid