false awakening

Pre: 5htp
Post: G, C, L-theanine

I don't remember how this one started for sure. I want to say that I WILDED it but I WILDED from am dream into a lucid dream if that makes sense.

First thing I remember was that I was on a train with others and I was in trouble or something. I had to find a place to sit in a booth but there was no where for legs, it was just like a table you could sit by but couldn't put your legs under. There was some large screws and a little movement trying to arrange but nothing. Somehow I started falling asleep and as I was falling asleep in the dream or maybe I woke up for a second and did a DILD, I felt myself falling to sleep, deeper and deeper until I was out. I could feel me breathing heavy but then I saw some light so I opened my eyes and I was in a different place, I moved my hand do do a RC and LUCID: I got up and went straight for a door, I was in a bedroom type area. I began to imagine what was outside and I think I was going for a city behind the door so I could find an elevator. When I got up to the door I could see it was cracked already and it looked like a backyard. I opened the door and was on like a balcony in a backyard. I could see that I wasn't in a city but a sort of neighborhood with a couple stores and other buildings here and there. I floated down off the balcony and for some reason I jumped in the pool, i don't know if I was trying to jump across or what but I went straight in. I swam to the other side and got out, I remember I was pretty irritated that I wasted time swimming in the pool. I think it was the same dream but I remember having a hat and a backpack on, the hat was annoying so I took it off. I left the backpack since I thought it would just get stuck and I wouldn't be able to get it off. Oh this lucid didn't have any people in it either. I got to a fence and decided to fly over it. I really concentrated on flying too so I wouldn't fail. I went up a little ways and then I couldn't stop myself once again. I kept slowly drifting up. I even tried to spin around and imagine what it would be like for the buildings to come towards me again, to no avail. I decided to just fly into space and find a planet. I began to fly up and very quickly saw that I had passed a red body in the sky.... MARS!! I was able to stop and fly back toward it, it was right in front of me but I missed it again. I ended up flying back and forth in front of it probably 2 or 3 more times. Finally I got close enough and I grabbed it like a big beach ball! Aghhhh! I think this really frustrated me and I woke or partially woke. I then had some either partially lucid or semi-lucid dreams, I don't remember doing more RC but I felt pretty in control and aware in the dreams.

I don't remember the order or if one ran into the other but here they are.

I think this was kind of a WILD. I was looking in a building using a program to let you see in the buildings like I was designing it. I wasn't walking just zooming through floors and walls, I was looking for people or elevators or both. I think I wound up in a basement (3rd person still) watching a group of people do some patchwork on a cement wall in the basement.

This one is really blurry and it may have been a continuation of the last. I was in a basement of a house, maybe the last one I was in and I was looking for an elevator. I kept going around corners hoping one was there and finally I asked someone down there if there was one. They told me the location and I went there. I found another lady and she pointed to a place on a cement wall and said there used to be one here. I began trying to hit the wall to try to bring it down but nothing happened.

I was walking along a street, I think I had a hat on again. I was in beach town or near a beach. I came up to an intersection and the traffic guard said to wait, I ignored him and crossed realizing it didn't matter. A bunch more people started crossing the street as well and were all around me. Don't remember anything else after this.

So normally I wouldn't post such a short lucid but this one is mentionable.

I was in the kitchen in the morning, nothing like my own really and I was making breakfast. I was going to make muffins but was putting them in individual muffin tin things and placing each one on a burner, I want to say the burner was coming from the top but I cant be sure. I was concerned in the dream that the muffins would burn or catch fire. I kept adjusting the flames to make sure this didn't happen. I looked at them all when I finally got them all on and some were really disfigured and flat while others looked decent. After they were done (I assume) I was scraping stuff off a tray and was amazed that there was nothing left. It all just disappeared and there was only a few burnt pieces of stuff left, looked like small burnt onions. I showed my mother in law who was in the kitchen with me and said how weird it was nothing was left. I then started to peel a banana to eat and then went to an area in the kitchen where my grandmother in law was working at making something else. I picked up something she was using like a bag of sugar and it dumped everywhere, all over the floor and counter. I was told I didn't need to help pick it up but helped anyways. Someone said something about me being late to work and I needed to eat and then my mother in law said I needed to make sure I was awake or wake up better. This prompted me to do a RC and I did the finger check, as always I was amazed this was a dream and did it several times, I had some wobbly fingers and more than 5. Lucid: I went to a door and imagined a city street like the one I had been on in my previous dream, as i opened the door the dream was beginning to fade and as I began to wake a saw some sort of field.

This afternoon I took a nap with my daughter and actually had a dream I remembered, this doesn't usually happen when I have a nap so it was really different. I was with a couple others in a room and we were going to fight some others. I was telling a guy next to me, who was a kid, maybe my son that he had to protect others from someone who couldn't control their powers. It seemed like last airbenderish if you will. I was going to show him that I could throw fire balls and I wound up but nothing came out. I woke up shortly after.

Pre Bed Supps: 250mg Valerian 30 mins prior, 100 mg 5htp at bed. Bed @ 1115

WBTB: 4am Supps: 3mg G, 250 C, 250 Valerian and .5 mel

Routine: Got up and took my Valerian right away to keep me rather calm and hopefully keep me on the sleepy side. Read some old DJ entries and went back to bed 25 minutes later, right before I layed down I took other supps.

Had one non lucid prior to WBTB and didn't have too hard of a time getting back to sleep.

Woke with this around 530 or so but didn't record till around 8 or 9.

I was downstairs in an inside/outside living area. I was lying in a bed and we were either really cleaning up or moving out of our house. My wife was upstairs throwing a bunch of stuff out of a window like papers and whatnot. I told her that it would probably make more sense if the bagged it up there so she didn't have to pick it up twice. She didn't really care for my comments. I layed down in bed to go to sleep with lucidity on my mine (this was in the dream), I woke again (FA) and there was a dog on my head. I ended up laying on the dog and trying to get back to sleep again, still thinking of lucidity. I put my head near the side of the bed and it kept sinking down further and further never ending. I thought that I might be in a dream at this point. I tried to open my eyes but it was very difficult, I could open them a bit but they would clamp back shut. After alot of struggling I got them to stay open but they were fluttering a bit. I fought a bit more and finally got them to stay open. I did a RC with my hand and brought it up to my face but couldn't see it. I tried again and again I couldn't see it. It was like I knew it was there and I should be able to see it but it just wasn't there. I rolled out of bed (didn't even get stuck in the covers this time) and was finally able to see my hands. They looked normal. Oh well, back to bed. I turned to get back in bed and it was now a tan couch now. I checked my hand again and really looked and noticed some awkwardness about them, then I saw the wavyness and the shrinking and growing of the fingers.

LUCID: I didn't study anything like I said I was and just walked over to the side of the room with some cabinets and a refrigerator. I was in a basement of a house, not huge just a single large room and a small bathroom off to the side. I went into the refrigerator since I wanted to try some more food and opened it. On the bottom I saw a can of peanut butter. I grabbed it and took off the lid and got some with my finger from inside the top ring of the container. It wasn't bad actually, tasted nutty at least. I just tasted didn't chew or swallow. I then decided to find some dog biscuits to do the task from last month. I went into one cabinet which had pots and pans. Then I told myself they were in this cabinet and opened a top one and there were a bunch of different bagged items. I went through a few of them not recognizing dog treats and then again I thought they are here in the back. I grabbed a yellow bag and tried to read it but couldn't make anything out. I knew they were either cat or dog treats. This will do. I opened it up and got a handful out. They were shaped as animals, kind of looked like the animal crackers but they had the color of a salami type meat. Pink with some of the white specks riddled through them. I dropped a couple on the floor for the dogs that were by me and then popped one in my mouth. It tasted meaty, nothing amazing or gross, just there really. I then began picking up the mess that I made, wrappers on the counter. I thought this was funny that I was cleaning up and it didn't matter but I kept doing it anyways. I tossed it all in the trashcan in the bathroom. I saw a window and thought to go out it but wanted to find some people to do the St Patties day TOTM on so stayed inside. I did however want to jump through the ceiling to get upstairs. I remember I pictured in my head this failing and it did. I jumped up and went through some of the ceiling tiles and came back down with broken tiles around me. Stairs it is. I headed for the stairs on the other side of the room and started climbing them. I was about half way up when I heard my daughter and wife talking about me liking frosting. Happily I replied "I do like frosting" and before I got to the door to go to the upstairs I woke up.

I was pretty excited I had this lucid that lasted probably 5 to 10 minutes after my previous 5 or 6 have been less than 10 seconds.

So two nights in a row for lucids, two last night. They haven't lasted longer than a few seconds for the last two nights. Guess I need to go back to stabilizing more before I get moving in the dream. I had 5 dreams I remembered clearly but only annotating the lucids on here.

Pre bed - 3mg Melatonin, 500 mg Valerian at 10pm
WBTB - 2mg G, 250mg C, 250mg Val, .3 mg Melatonin. 4am. (usually do this earlier but alarm didn't go off)

1. In a grocery store at a red box. I was trying one of my CC that has been acting up lately (worn out strip) and it wouldn't take it. I ran it over and over again. A couple got behind me in line and this added to my frustration. I looked for my other CC but I couldn't find it in my wallet. I did find another card but it was probably for a grocery store to get discounts. I got out of line frustrated. I turned around and got ready to walk out. I was at the end of all of the check out lines and reached in my pocket to get my keys. I pulled them out and half were missing. This frustration led me to do a RC and I found I had 6 fingers. LUCID: I immediately thought of dog biscuit TOTM and began to walk and whirled out of the dream. This is probably my shortest lucid to date.

2. I was lying in bed sleeping and heard the TV. I thought maybe I was dreaming since the TV wasn't on when I went to bed. This may have been a FA WILD but I am not sure. I had a couple of dreams after the last lucid before this one. Anyways my eyes seemed like they were glued shut or I was just so very tired. I finally managed to get them open and I was in a bedroom. I looked at my hand and saw five fingers, but I wasn't really convinced. I struggled with my covers a lot and then finally managed to get out of bed. I looked at my hand again and thought I saw a faint 6th finger. This was not my bedroom but a bedroom I had at my dads house when I was in high school. No bells went off yet though. I went to the window and looked out. I saw trees and a street beyond them, it was very peaceful outside and still dark out. I tried to look at my hands again and again a faint 6th finger but it was still dark in the room. I walked to the bedroom door to the light switch and on the way there I pinched myself under the arm. Didn't feel anything, but still not convinced. I then turned on the light switch and it didn't work. I looked and there were several different plates. I switched another on and the lights came on. I looked at my fingers now and had seven on one hand. I checked the other and had 7 as well. Lucid: I thought of going downstairs and getting a dog biscuit, again I immediately spun out. Not sure what is going on lately. Guess I need to work on stabilizing a little more once becoming lucid and I am a little calmer.

So before this one I had another non lucid dream that I got up and took notes on around 4. Went back to bed, had this and woke up 3 minutes before my alarm at 5.

It started as me watching a gun fight out side, there was green grass around and it was a little hilly. Somehow it morphed into me in a gun fight and the background was now a convenience store. I had a hand gun and was taking people out left and right. I wound up getting an uzi from one of them and took some more out. Again I had a hand gun and there was a guy with a plastic badge hanging from his pocket with glasses. He was suspicious so I took him out. It didn't seem like my bullets were doing much to him but they took him down regardless. I got a box of ammunition off of him and was going to reload my gun. I ejected the clip and looked at it. It was a strange clip that went from small to big and back to small to big again. I wasn't sure how to get the bigger bullets past the smaller opening. I realized that if I put the clip back in my gun and pulled it out again that I could will it to the size of the bullet that I had in the box. I had to find out what size the bullet was in the box so I looked at the box to read the size. As I was focusing on the letters on the box (which were very out of focus), instantly I was in a bed reading a tag on a pillow I believe. This was a sort of false awakening but I already knew it was a dream at this point. I did a RC (hand check) here and realized it was a dream. LUCID: It was very dark in the room and trying to stabilize on my hand was pretty hard. I felt kind of stable in the dream. I got up out of bed after some fighting with the darn covers. To the right was a small window and I contemplated going out that but decided to explore the house to see what house I was in. I went toward the door and opened it. I looked at my hand again to try to get more stable but it was still really dark. There was a hallway to my right and a banister in front of me. I tried to go right but was frozen in place, I couldn't move. After a little stress I woke up. This has happened to me before while I was flying in the dark I couldn't control where I was going. I think that I wasn't stable enough. I totally spaced out on using vocal commands and tactile stabilization techniques. Pretty sucky for my first lucid in about 10 days.

Well I just typed this whole thing and it didn’t save right and now I am starting all over. Going to type on word on my computer then copy and paste. Sucky.

Bed: 1115
Supplements: 100mg 5htp, 250 mg Valerian Root
WBTB: 4 am
Supplements: 250 mg Valerian, 4 mg Galantamine, 500 mg Choline, .4mg Melatonin

I was a little restless getting back to sleep but after about 45 minutes was able to.
I woke up about 45 minutes after I fell asleep not thinking I had slept at all except I remember a fairly vivid dream. I recalled a bit and then went back to bed quickly.

Non-Lucid: I was eating with others and an ex-coworker was among them. I was being very quiet and then all of a sudden broke the silence and asked if they still worked there. I had a hard time conveying what I wanted to say during this dream. The words would come out slurred or very quiet and the DCs had a hard time hearing me. The scene turned into an office type area and we continued to chat about work a bit. I left to look for my room since now I was a hotel . I went up a couple of floors since my room was 501 or 50 something. I passed some stairs and saw a couple more people I knew and said something indiscernible to them as well. I was on floor 5 but it was a bunch of offices and this area I wasn’t supposed to be on. Not sure of this transition but I ended up outside by a bay. The weather was grey and wind. There was a large boat and a bunch of shopping carts lined up in the water, they were moving up and down with the waves. I went around the boat to a pier area. I needed to get across the bay but there was a huge line of people to take the transportation boats across. The line was behind and above me on a wooden dock area. I stood there wondering how I could get across, thought of swimming or taking a different boat but could figure nothing out. I woke from this and recalled for a bit then went back to sleep.

Laying in bed with my eyes closed there was a female with their arm over me, not sure who it was at this point. They had their hand on my boy parts and the dream got a little sexual at this point so to keep it PG13 I thought something was a little strange shortly after this and did a RC.

LUCID: I did some stabilization with my hand for a bit then started touching stuff around the room. I rubbed a blanket on the bed which was very fuzzy and really focused everything. I touched the window which was nice and cool. I was in a cabin type room with wood paneling and tall narrow rectangular windows. Instantly I thought of TOTM invisibility and the infamous girl’s locker room. Fortunately there was a school across the street, unfortunately it was an elementary school and that wouldn’t work. I hit the window with my elbow, broke the glass and went through. The school was till across the street, I was in a parking lot/street area with roads/highways above. I noticed many people around and thought about the new years resolution TOTMI yelled focus a couple of times and it seemed to focus a bit more. I saw a police officer about 100 yards away and was going to ask him. I looked down at my clothes and I was wearing a white shirt. I wanted to be in a suit or something nice. I tried a few times to will new clothes but had no success. I got pulled from the dream but was able to DEILD right back to a scene with a smaller boat. I was headed toward the boat to get in but was pulled back out of the dream. DEILD again and very wary of getting pulled out again I didn’t open my eyes and didn’t move. I was in a boat moving along a canal (feeling). There was a lady in the boat talking about mailing a package and she was concerned with the size and the price of the box. The boat stopped and I was out of the boat. I reached out for something to grab and felt something with my left hand, a rough wall, stucco. I opened my eyes and was solid in the dream. We were at a strip mall type place that was outside with grey stucco. I climbed some stairs in front of me and entered some glass doors into the first shop I found. As I entered the shop there was a rack of coats by the door, I touched them to anchor myself further and yelled “focus” again as I turned a corner. I saw 2 guys and a customer (girl from the boat) at the counter. They were all looking at me since I just shouted a moment earlier. I thought of the new years TOTM again and walked up to the guy at the counter behind the register. I asked him “what is your new years resolution” he was very perplexed with this question. After a few seconds of him thinking he said got out …. “To think” and I said sarcastically “you want to think?”, the then said “ well I have an inspection coming up”…. “To pass inspection”. I was good with this answer and then backed up. I had a plan for the opposite TOTM. I stood on my hand (this was not graceful like I imagined, more like a neck handish stand then a full on hand stand). I said “gravity is reversed today”. This was less dramatic than I anticipated as well but they did float up in thie air like they were in space. I flipped back around content with this and as I left I told them “opposite day is later this month”. Outside I looked for somewhere to do invisible task and saw a lady and two kids go into an apartment area. I flew/floated across the street to an area with houses/apartments. I went into a door. The room was bare and dark, marbled grey and black and kinda futuristic looking. There were many doors but all of them were locked but one. I went in the unlocked one and it was a tv room with a couch and a big dark window above the couch. 2 DCs were in there, one was Eddie Murphy and the other was some Arabic guy. I looked down and had a bunch of clothes on. I took a big snow outfit type of clothing off with some difficulty. I grabbed a football with some writing on it off of the entertainment center and began to toss it back and forth and hold it like I was going to throw it. Eddie wasn’t happy with this and he asked me about my broken window. I said that it didn’t matter anymore. I decided I was going to fly up and out the window. I took off and landed on the windowsill. I think I might have had an FA here but not sure. Behind me I knew it was a counseling session for people who thought they were in dreams but weren’t. To be sure I wasn’t crazy I did a RC again… phew still dreaming. I was perched on the window sill and in front of me was a huge pine tree; I thought of crashing through it but decided to focus on TOTM. Across the street were a dirt parking lot and a restaurant there. I flew over and landed in the lot. There were a few RVs in the lot and the restaurant was a seafood restaurant and it was up some stairs and off of a wooden deck. I decided to make myself invisible then. I closed my eyes and thought about brining my hand in front of my face and not being able to see it. I felt I was invisible and my eyes were still closed, right before I opened them again I thought about people who said that they can’t close their eyes when they are in a lucid or they wake up. I thought about me doing it just finds and at that moment woke up.

This was around 7am and I got up and wrote good notes since some of the details from earlier started to fade. I went back to lay down and hadn’t been asleep for but a couple minutes when my daughter got up. Not sure if the supplements did everything or it was a placebo effect. I am going to keep experimenting every few days.

Ok well I was out of town and didn't have the time to do these on a daily basis.

29Dec13

I took notes on this one after the fact, a couple dreams after and wrote the night after I had it so it was pretty fuzzy.

I was dating or met and started dating a girl. There was another girl (her friend) who was dating one of my friends. Bars and clubs. Rode a bicycle with both of them down a street and going up and down street curbs. Other girl began to go crazy and tried to steal my car, I got in passenger side and pulled e-break so she couldn't take it. Ended up at a show where both of them had been performers. I took a seat for the show in a theater in the second row down, had to pass a few people and sat next to an older lady who had to move her leg or her purse. The intro was someone from the dukes of hazard apologizing for the crazy girl not being there and sorry they could not perform that night. The second act started with tall skinny girls dancing, they were all fully clothed from head to toe in heavy woven fabric doing crazy dancing.

30Dec13

This one I went lucid in and took notes right when I woke up. There was a lot more before this but I only remember snippits.

Started with me on a ship. I was going to the aft end and up a couple of decks. I went outside to see how the deck looked to see what shape it was in. For some reason I was carrying a blanket. Anyways when I got there it was really rusted but it looked like it had been freshly painted in some spots. In the water was clouds of stuff either dirt or rust. I turned around to head in and at this point is was night. A girl who worked for me was standing there and was very sad. I talked to her and found out that her husband had died. I asked from what and she said it was something crazy like malaria. I consoled her and hugged her deeply and for a long time. She climbed into my lap like a child would and straddled me. A few more people showed up there or were there and I just noticed. I knew or had the feeling that her husband was a jerk and bad for her. I told her that she should go out with another girl that was there and they should tear up the town, trying to break up the tension. Another girl crawled up to the girl who was very young, maybe 2 and I was surprised she was there by herself. I told the girl that I would take care of everything with her husband and left. I got up and started climbing stairs up and thought, "oh I have a lot to do, stressful" this was a cue to do a reality check, hands, fingers were 5, 6, 7 nice.

LUCID: I thought of flying up the rest of the way and then remembered I was working on anchoring. I looked at my hands in detail, wrinkles and hairs, moved closer to the light to get better detail. I now felt anchored! I was half way up stairs but now I was climbing up boxes. I climbed to the top and now I was on a stack of boxes and crates in a big open area, still on a ship. I anchored again since I was in a new place. Once I finished thought what should I do? I thought try to shoot fire balls from your hands? why not? This was one thing I had on my bucket list. I put my hand in the air and did some moving and thought and some words and said "fire!" and threw my hand forward. The ball went it was a ball a little bigger than a baseball, it was kind of a puttering fire ball, it was black and then on fire and black and kind of moved this way and that way. This is not the type of ball I wanted to shoot. I imagined more what I wanted it to look like and threw another. Much better it went faster and kept fire and straight. I threw it towards a couple of people and they jumped out of the way. I threw several of them all around me at people. fun. How about ice? I then threw ice balls around me in a similar fashion, these were just like snow balls. Then I tried electricity/lightning, my favorite by far. Balls of light went and when they hit gave the DC they were thrown at a nice jolt. To my right there were a couple people who looked like they were going to retaliate, so I began to use both hands and threw a barrage of fire balls towards them. Needless to say there was no retaliation. There was this really large guy behind me who I had thrown a couple of balls at and he dodged, I hit him with lightning and it zapped him. I finished throwing balls and climbed down the boxes. He was kind of mocking me so I thought of something else I could do, a "finishing move" I guess. So I threw both my hands in the air and said "Meteor!" and brought them down, at this point it began to rain meteors and got the mocker. I was thoroughly pleased with myself. I headed toward a door that was in front of me to further explore. As I reached toward a door knob the big guy grabbed my leg and pleaded with me not to go. I kind of stressed a little bit since he was so big and I didn't know if I could get him off of me. I shook once and he went off a bit. I started getting a bit mad and thought that if I couldn't get him off he was going to get it, I didn't have a plan for it but it was going to be rough for him. I did one more shake and he was off. I opened the door and walked into a neighborhood. The grass was green, it was a nice blue sky. The neighborhood was nice and I had just stepped out of the front door of a mid sized house, stucco siding and the clay shingles on the roof, 2 story. The house next door was similar as well. I noticed a big tree with green leaves. The road was a light blue like it hadn't finished loading the color yet. I practiced anchoring and probably didn't do it for long enough. I began walking toward the house next door and contemplated what I was going to do, break into the house? whoosh... out of the dream.

31st - Not much recall and only snippits.
The funeral of a friend and a moment of silence.
Waiting for others when I was leading, they would not follow. it was a mall like area.

1st - Not much recall and only snippits again but maybe an OBE?
Main thing I remember is falling asleep, I felt dream bodyish and just kind of rolled out of my body. I looked back in my bed and saw my wife sleeping, I didn't' see me.... or did I? My mind was playing tricks on me but it was definitely a dream now that I am remembering. I never became fully lucid since my mind convinced me I was just up from bed, don't remember what happened after that.