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    The Nomad Chronicles

    The Cool Factor

    by , 07-06-2011 at 06:59 PM (1791 Views)
    Brainwave: Delta, Deep Dream State

    I roll out of bed, and stand up. There are a circle of angels standing around me. They seem annoyed. “Dreamer, you violated-”
    I see they are all actually demons. I laugh. They are now more annoyed I saw through their guise. “Hello, henchmen!” I grin.
    “We are not your henchmen!” they pout.
    “Well, I am about to go on some awesome dream adventures. You can come if you want. Or you can wander around in your gay angel costumes.”
    “You’re gay.”
    “You’re gay-ER! Bye!” I open a portal to the Moon. One of the demons grabs my ankle, and I have trail of them going to the Moon. In the wormhole, the Wyrm looks at me curiously, and I just laugh. We land on the landing pad on the Temple of Nowhere. I become a demonic cat god.
    “Tonight, my brothers, we roll up on some dreamers, and make those mofos have nightmares. They want it, to become lucid.”
    “Oh, they will be lucid all right,” one demon says, and cracks his knuckles.
    “They will not forget any nightmare I give!” says another.
    “And, they will have no dream control. I love deceiving people!” says another.
    “Wait... you are the three main dream demons that tormented me as a child!”
    “Yes!” They grin.
    I roar, and instantly teleport all of us to The Battle Pyramid.
    I become my Demon Self, Deathgawn.

    I am nine feet tall, with skin like charcoal, and a black hole on my chest. I summon a flaming morning star, and crack it like a whip. I energize my energy shield that Selene gave me, but I form it into an armor instead of a sphere. I energize my boots. The Battle Pyramid increases in size by 1000 to accommodate my power. I energize my energy gauntlets. I pound one into the ground like a jackhammer, creating a mild earthquake. Dust fall on us, and the demons lose their footing.
    “You can’t power up before battle! This isn’t Dragon Ball Z!”
    They rush at me, but I just project my energy shield out from me, in a sphere, and they bounce off. My witchblade forms over my body. I float up off the ground, and magnetic mecharmor attaches to me. I summon a small iron shield, and the other armor forms over it.
    One of the demons teleports into my energy shield behind me. I grab him, and throw him forward as I shrink the shield, and it burns him like acid. He screams, and teleports to the other side.
    The other demons just look at me.
    I grow in size as I grow six arms more arms. I summon the Moonblade, the Budgie Sword, the Witchblade. Four more empty hands. Shotgun. Machine gun. Two more arms. These arms have dragon tattoos on them my baby dragon pets, Skyfire and Hydro. The dragons come to life, and rest on my shoulders. Jo, my astral pet, my war beast growls off my forearm and rests on my hand. In the other hand, I summon the Flaming Sword of the archangel, Michael. The winged angel helm appears on my head, and burns into my scalp.
    “You cannot wield the power of angels, brother!” the demons shout.
    The helm burns into my flesh, but I ignore the pain. Suddenly, I can see... I see with the eyes of angels. I have finally discovered the purpose of this helmet! to summon the sword of Michael, to see with Angel Sight. I see the demons now, glowing orange. I see demons crawling all over the inside of the pyramid. Thousands of them. Thousands pretending to be three. Me against an invisible demon army. I like these odds. I crack the morning star like a whip, and cold blue electric fire shoots out of the iron ball. I throw the giant Budgie Sword, and the parakeets which make up the sword become a flock of thousands, which of course the demons laugh at, until each parakeet becomes a tiny blue blade, spinning faster and faster, bouncing off the inside walls of the pyramids, slicing through their bodies. I throw the Moonblade, and it goes out and comes back to me like a boomerang. Moonlight slices through them like butter. I lay down fire with my machine gun. The bullets split into ten pieces right before they hit. Fuck yeah. Then, I realize the bullets are covered with infectious nanomachines. Even fuckier yeah! The demons rush at me, but I blow them away with my shotty, which is somehow cybernetic steampunk cyborg beast. My dragons fly off my shoulders, and float through the air, in lazy figure 8's, burning and shooting ice bullets through the demons. They leap up on the the dragons, but slip off like water off a duck’s back.
    Jo leaps into the fray, and bites demons on their throats, and whips them into the air like a terrier killing rats. Now there are four swarms of demons around each of us. I call my allies to me. I hit the Atom button on my belt, and the four of us shrink to microscopic size. I ride on Jo’s back, and one dragon lands on each arm. I merge with all three, so now I am an eight legged lion man dogdemon centaur beast with two dragon arms, one blue, one gold. My bat wings grow out of my back. I can hear the demons say, “Where did he go?” My energy, then witchblade, then mecha armor forms over me.
    I go back to regular size.
    “Shit! You are cheating!” they complain.
    I shoot my dragons at them. The dragons fly out and spin, shooting ice bullets and fire everywhere. I ride into the fray, and rip the demons bodies’ apart. Selene appears, and opens a myriad of portals. I multiply myself. One Nomad for each demon. I rip them all apart, and summon the Mjolnir. I smash them to bits with the Hammer of Thor, and pull the portals closer to the bits. There is a woman flying around with a vaccuum cleaner, sucking the rest up. Then I realize it is Stephanie, the Biodome AI, looking out for me. All the demons are gone.
    I sit down on the floor of the Battle Pyramid in exhaustion, then teleport back to the Temple. Sarnox comes out with pomegranate juice wine. I take a deep draught, then toss the goblet away. “Mahalo, brother.”
    Skyfire and Rainstorm/Hydro appear in front of me. They smile, and I make it rain on them. They fly to the horizon of the jungle canopy. Jo appears next to me, and I pet him as he purrs like tiny rumbling earthquake.
    “Uh, Sarnox?”
    “Yes, m’lord?”
    “Dude, don’t call me that.”
    “Isn’t it annoying?”
    “Yes.”
    “My apologies, Your Grace.”
    “Dude!”
    “What?”
    “What am I supposed to do next?”
    “Well, you were going to give nightmares-”
    “Oh right... boring...” I open a couple portals and toss some scary silvery bugs down the wormholes. “Ok, next?”
    “The beacon.”
    “The beacon is lit.”
    “No it’s not. You turned it off.”
    “Why did I do that?”
    “You said it wasn’t fair.”
    “I don’t care what I said! Turn it back on.”
    “You turn it on! You’re the god here.”
    “I am the god of Nothing!”
    “And we are in the Temple of Nothing, asshole!”
    “FINE!”
    I teleport to the top of the pyramid, and it opens up. I slam a golden staff into a contraption, and a beautiful gold and green light beams down to Urth.
    Sarnox teleports next to me.
    “Is this fair?” he says.
    “Well, dog, these kids are supposed to meet at this other pyramid on Earth, but they are probably going to end up here.”
    “Why?”
    “The Cool Factor.”
    “Explain.”
    “Well, the Temple of Nothing is pretty badass. When that Atras dude said for them to meet at a ziggurat, he may have had no idea that we fucking live here, dude! HAHAHAHA!”
    “So, he accidentally suggested for these people to-”
    I see dreamers flying up the beam of light. They land on the landing pad near us. There are eight of them. Five of which instantly disappear. They were vague anyway. I could tell they were losing the dream. Oh well.
    “See what you did!” Sarnox accuses. “They got confused because of your stupid beacon, and they came here instead, and woke up because they don’t know how to bilocate yet. DUDE.”
    “No, they are just learning. Just stop! There are three right here. Let’s talk to them. Hey guys, look at your hands. Stabilize the dream.”
    They all begin talking at once. By their language I can tell one is an American, one is French Canadian, and one is Eastern European. I turn on my Babelfish.
    The European guy disappears as he wakes up. The French Canadian dude says, “Ah, you are Nomad? You are the cat!” he laughs. “Cat and dog!” he says, pointing at Sarnox. The American guy says, “Hey, hey, it’s me, Atras. I made it! Is this the pyramid thing! Yes! Where are we? Who are you? Nomad? Is this aliens? Are we aliens? Holy shit! Are we on the Moon? Holy shit!”
    “Calm down, breathe. I turn them around, and show them the Land of Nod.
    The Canadian guy screams, “OH MARY OH JESUS!” in French and wakes up.
    I notice Atras dream body quavers for a second at this.
    “He’s okay, just be calm, and breathe.”
    “Okay, sir.”
    “Please don’t call me that.”
    Atras laughs. “This dream, is amazing.”
    “This is your dream," I tell Atras.
    “Wait, isn’t this your dream?”
    “This is just... dream.”
    “We are pure energy.”
    “Yes,” I say.
    “We don’t need air to breathe.”
    “No.”
    “We are invincible, aren’t we?” Atras says.
    “Yes.”
    He flies into the air, transforming into an angel consumed in orange flame.
    “I AM INVINCIBLE!” he shouts exultantly, and light beams of a thousand colors shoot out from his center. He laughs exuberantly, and disappears.
    “DUDE THAT WAS FUCKING COOL!” I shout, and turn to Sarnox as we HI-5.

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