The Nomad Chronicles

I am sitting at a wedding feast of the gods, which I apparently rejoined after leaving with Eris. Hera, Aphrodite, and Athena are alternately fuming at me, and ignoring me. I chuckle to myself.
I stand up and walk around. The setting on Mount Olympus is amazing. Wildflowers and majestic tall trees are everywhere.
I see Hercules drunkenly tossing boulders over a cliff, whooping it up. I join him at his side, tossing boulders over. He stops.
"No, Mr. Nothing, this game is called Drunken Boulder Toss. Every time you miss, you have to take a drink."
"Miss what?"
See that mountain? That's out target."
I toss a boulder at a mountain peak which is about two miles away. I make it about 15 or 20 yards out from the cliff.
Hercules laughs and pours wine out of a large barrel into a golden flask for me to drink. I drink deeply. It's amazing. Sweet, fruity, and delicious.
Zeus joins us. He tosses a boulder. It goes sailing into the sky until it's out of sight.
"You have missed, father!" Hercules laughs uproariously. Zeus joins in, and pours himself a drink.
I pick up a boulder and toss it straight up. It lands on my head, bounces off, then rolls off the edge of the cliff. Hercules falls over laughing, and Zeus hands me another drink of godly wine.
Pan walks over to us. He tosses a boulder to Hercules, who catches it. "I missed the mountain," he grins. And puts his face under the wine barrel spigot and pours it into his mouth he drinks the whole barrel.
"Okay... beetchez... firszt, I'mz going to toss one of theses bitchees..."
He picks up a boulder, and tosses it at the mountain. It sails through air, and hits it, making a huge cloud dust and a muffled boom. We all clap and laugh drunkenly.
"Hmm... let me try! That wine works well."
I pour an entire barrel into my mouth also.
I pick up a boulder and lift it above my head, and accidentally toss it backwards. It lands behind me on a steep slope, and rolls down to me. I turn, and the boulder crashes right into me. I get stuck to it, and roll with it down the cliff. It feels like a fun ride. The boulder and I, roll to the bottom, then I fly up and rejoin the other gods on the plateau above. They are laughing uproariously.
"Did I win?"
They laugh harder.
Zeus shouts, "NO!" with a thunder clap, and tosses a boulder at me, which I narrowly dodge.