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    1. Buying a Mad Magazine

      by , 02-27-2018 at 08:27 AM
      Morning of February 27, 2018. Tuesday.



      I am in an unfamiliar store and looking at a large wooden display unit for magazines. It has four shelf sections and is as long as the aisle.

      I notice an American Mad Magazine on the third shelf up, the front cover of which resembles that of issue 145 from September 1971 (with the original’s cover price being 40 cents), though the art is somewhat sketchy, seemingly by Don Martin, and drawn smaller and lower than the real version. It also seems to be implied to be a hot air balloon with a male character hanging from the basket’s gunwale on the left side and a female character facing left in profile and looking down at him with a question mark over her head.

      I pick it up with my left hand but I never open it. Still, I perceive that some of the pages are stiffer than usual, perhaps due to several different thin cardboard pages throughout. I consider that it may be a special issue. I assume it is two dollars and prepare to buy it, discovering that I have an Australian two-dollar coin in my right hand.

      Zsuzsanna is also soon present and she finds a magazine that she plans to buy. It seems to be a different issue of Mad Magazine, but I do not see the cover.

      I go to the singular checkout counter, which looks somewhat like the type in a convenience store, although there is no display unit at the front. I prepare to pay for the magazine when I notice that I am also carrying, in my left hand (and below the magazine), what looks like three VHS cases, though smaller than real ones and ambiguously associated with DVD cases. Looking at them, they all seem to be folk music albums.

      Their covers are all in brown and beige hues and feature mostly print (apparently lists of song titles). I put them in a display bin in which others are strewn, at the end of the aisle near the checkout. Going back, I notice that I still have one case in my hand, and wonder how I had missed putting it back. I feel somewhat annoyed by my absentmindedness.

      When I am at the checkout (Zsuzsanna standing on my left), the unfamiliar male cashier tells me it will be twelve dollars. Looking at the cover, even seeing that the price in the upper right corner reads as $3.12 (three dollars and twelve cents), I still exclaim, “How can a two dollar magazine be twelve dollars?” I consider that I might pay the amount, as I start to remember that American magazines in Australia are much more expensive than their printed cover price, but I wake at this point.



      Zsuzsanna is usually on my left in the last segment of a dream. This is subliminal awareness that she is on my left as we are sleeping, and as such, is a common DSI (Dream State Indicator).

      The Mad Magazine cover depicts static “failed flight waking symbolism”, suggesting that the character is about to fall, potentially precursory symbolism of my dream self in waking transition (the typical biological jolt of waking). However, these common dynamics had been quashed in this case, both in being featured on a liminal space divider (magazine cover) and oriented incorrectly. This is otherwise based on the biological vestibular system ambiguity of being unconscious, unrelated to waking life. There has been at least one VSA factor in at least one of my dreams of each sleeping period for over fifty years, so pretending that VSA autosymbolism is relevant to waking life is asinine (other than when literally prescient, though I doubt I will be in a hot air balloon or buying a Mad Magazine in the future).

      This dream is the typical checkout scenario, which is autosymbolism of consciousness reascension (leaving the dream state), one of my most common factors of waking autosymbolism since childhood. The confusion about prices (as well as having to do the same thing more than once) is a common dream state dynamic (as the non-lucid dream self does not usually possess or maintain viable thinking skills or temporality) of which is unrelated to waking life and the conscious self.

      The preconscious personification (the cashier) is an unfamliar male to prevent my dream from having waking life associations. (However, in direct contrast, this factor is sometimes inexplicably prescient.)

      RAS mediation renders the store as unfamiliar to prevent my conscious mind from mistaking it as being related to waking life (for prevention of false or ambiguous memories). (There is always the possibility that it may be visually prescient, but it is probably only the usual unique fictitious composite.)

      In summary, this dream features the usual components and autosymbolism. The Mad Magazine cover is similar to the first issue that my mother bought me when I began to collect them in 1971, thus this represents the induction marker of my dream, while the checkout is the exit marker.


      Updated 05-20-2018 at 04:18 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    2. The Orb in the Mist

      by , 02-26-2018 at 05:04 PM
      Morning of October 7, 2008. Tuesday.



      I am standing near a river in late morning. A mist begins to grow and rise from the river. Later, it seems more like early evening.

      Eventually, the mist is elsewhere with an undetermined orange light within it, implied to be like a miniature sun. Zsuzsanna is present at one point and some of the light within the mist shines through and augments her beauty. (I am unsure if the setting is implied to be indoors or outdoors, a common ambiguous factor of the dream state.)



      My dream begins with the common water induction (water being autosymbolism for entering the dream state, occurring as such at least once in every normal sleeping period for over fifty years). The mist symbolizes the essence of the dream state itself, which obscures the orb of light (conscious self identity). This is very similar to many previous dreams of which utilize the same autosymbolism, typical RAS mediation of which is similar to many dreams I have had about something being wrong with the sun, which is biological autosymbolism for my conscious self identity being incomplete while in the dream state.



      (The first two episodes of the fourth season of “Supernatural” aired the night before, included here for personal date-tracking purposes only.)


      Categories
      lucid
    3. Synergism in Liminal Space

      by , 02-23-2018 at 08:36 AM
      Morning of February 23, 2018. Friday.



      In the first part of my dream, I am sitting on the floor of the Gellibrand Street apartment’s porch. (We have not lived there in years.) I am looking through and reading some coupons relating to free offers. By writing down four letters which appear on the coupon, KLRS, and then the next letter after each, underneath, LMST, it somehow causes a package to be immediately sent to our front door, though I do not open it as I focus on the unusual nature of this puzzling technology. I begin to ponder on how the company would know what I wrote in a notebook in my own home.

      I later write LMPR, and MNQS underneath. (Throughout my dream, I clearly read and write uppercase letters which remain the same, which is atypical of the dream state, as writing typically changes in many dreams when looking back at it again.) A handwritten message appears above the letters relating to the activation of a special offer. Similar events occur a few more times.

      I begin to wonder more about how this is possible. The setting changes (without my dream self paying much attention) to an unfamiliar location. It is a large room with a table. Dennis (an older half-brother on my mother’s side ) is present. (I have not seen him in real life since 1994.)

      I tell Dennis about the companies and clubs that somehow cause handwritten messages to appear in my notebook. I look through my notebook and, for a time, cannot find the evidence, though I eventually do and show him. One message is on what looks like black embossing tape with white letters. It easily comes off the page. Dennis is curious, but I consider he may not be convinced of this inexplicable technology.

      “Watch this,” I tell him. Instead of getting a code from a coupon, I make up a sequence. I write NOPQ, but decide to change it to LMNR, as I consider the code would probably not have four letters in a row in alphabetical order as such, even though they are otherwise in an alphabetical sequence. I then write MNOS underneath. A handwritten message appears out of nowhere that displays something like, “Thank you for activating your membership.” I use NORS, OPST underneath, and a similar message appears. I ask Dennis, “How are they doing this?” He does not reply. I use MNOS a few times (with NOPT), each time on a different page, and the same message appears above what I had written, relating to benefits of membership activation, though I eventually get, “You have already activated your membership. Thanks for your participation.”

      I start to consider that there may be hidden cameras everywhere. This seems to “explain” it, though I forget about the unlikelihood of writing appearing on paper from no discernible source.

      I write MNOS again and NOPT underneath. A large moving image of a Doberman Pinscher’s head appears on the wall. It is as if a film is being shown; the aspect ratio is square. The dog is apparently barking, but there is no sound. I perceive this as some sort of function to express a warning about repeatedly using the same code to activate something that had already been activated. There is no sense of threat at any time or any genuine wariness. In fact, I find it somewhat amusing even if it is inexplicable.

      Again, I ask Dennis, “How are they doing this?” There is now also an unfamiliar male in the room who I do not see as an imposer or related to the inexplicable events. I consider that he may be puzzled as well.



      Dreams are mainly ascending reticular activating system mediation (and modulation when the dream self by way of subliminal conscious self intent attempts to remain asleep) between transient dream self and whole conscious self identity, primarily being autosymbolism for consciousness reascension while subliminally exploring the dream state. Why so many people completely ignore this truth in favor of asinine pretense (often focusing on negative dynamics even where there are none) has baffled me since childhood. My development since early childhood, in understanding the dream state (and dismissing the tripe of books on the “meanings” of dreams while even marrying my literal “dream girl” in real life), has resulted in an extraordinary virtuous circle effect as seen in this dream, even though my dream self remains puzzled about the communication from my conscious self. Yes, that is what is happening. My conscious self is sending threads of communication (by way of the ECF, emergent consciousness factor, in RAS mediation) to my dream self to enhance skills which typically do not exist in the dream state (though some asinine individuals make the ridiculous claim that one cannot read in the dream state at all). It has nothing to do with “messages from the subconscious”, as my dream self IS the subconscious (and the subconscious is a dynamic band that has no viable temporality or consistent intelligence). Aside from that, only the conscious self has viable reasoning skills, including coherent perception of the written language, and yet here, my dream self maintains (again through the virtuous circle effect of having devoted much of my life to dream state study and enhancement of the dream state) some extent of control and feasible discernment regardless of not being viably lucid.

      The dog in the final scene represents the obedience factor (as I have explained in my journal many times before) as well as this dream’s WAF (waking alert factor) by way of my subliminal attempt to sustain the dream state. The wall is a liminal space divider between dream self and conscious self identity. The (transpersonal) preconscious personification (the unfamiliar male in the room) remains passive in my dream self’s subliminal activity until I wake.


      Updated 02-26-2018 at 08:37 AM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    4. “Doll” Oddity and Transformation on a Spaceship

      by , 02-21-2018 at 01:52 PM
      Morning of September 9, 1966. Friday.



      I am apparently on a spaceship, though there are no others around except for a couple of adult males who are talking near the end of a hall until they go around a corner (a common event in early childhood dreams). As I wander around, not being focused on much of anything, I see what I first think is a baby lying on the floor on its back, though partly covered with a ragged blanket. I soon consider that it is probably a plastic doll that someone dropped, but upon closer look, it is a heavy metallic statue of a man in a combat helmet, though unrealistically rendered somewhat as having a baby’s body proportions.

      Later, a young girl with a lion shows me to the “front door” so I can go home. She is carrying the “statue”, which is now a ragged cloth doll with no apparent face, which is smaller than what this oddity had been minutes before. The “front door” turns out to be a semicircular ceiling (somewhat like the essence of a cave rather than a building or spaceship) that first seems to display outer space, though eventually I see the buildings of La Crosse and my apartment building. My dream fades from here.



      The night before (September 8, 1966), I had watched the first episode of “Star Trek” ever shown on television; “The Mantrap”; as well as the “Tarzan” episode “Eyes of the Lion”, which came directly before it on the same channel. This “Tarzan” episode (as well as movies like “The Lion” from 1962, which also featured a young girl with an adult male lion) had influenced a number of my dreams later on despite the fact I had confused it in my teenage years with “The Haunted Lighthouse”, an episode of “Lost in Space” that also featured a girl (Penny), a lion, a cave, and “going back home”, though that did not air until October 18, 1967. In the “Tarzan” episode, a young blind girl who lived in a cave used an adult lion as a seeing-eye animal. (I am still wary of lions in some dreams, depending on my level of unconsciousness in relationship to my dream state awareness level, as it is a natural factor of potential RAS modulation as the waking alert factor, and additionally as emergent consciousness coalescence, as a lion can swallow the dream self, though this coalescence factor has been re-symbolized as hugging in some dreams, by way of virtuous circle, as with “Changing the Lion of Coalescence into my Wife Zsuzsanna" from December 3, 2016).

      I can easily see the autosymbolism of this dream. The soldier statue was implied as a RAS modulation precursor, as RAS is often aggressive if I subliminally decide that it is not time to wake yet. However, I eventually accepted consciousness reascension and there was no conflict. Learning the nature of the dream state at an early age was very beneficial, as nightmares or even “bad dreams” are extremely rare, other than when biologically premonitory.



      This online dream journal entry was reformatted from the source material, abridged, and clarified on Wednesday, 21 February 2018.


    5. No Lion Threat

      by , 02-20-2018 at 10:28 AM
      Morning of December 31, 1999. Friday.



      I am with a group of about eight people, all of whom are unfamiliar and unknown to me. The setting is a partial house with typical indoor outdoor ambiguity. The people seem somewhat friendly and there is no conflict at any point. It is an informal social atmosphere.

      Eventually, there is at least one lion walking around near the perimeter of what is implied to be the house. It looks our way a few times but there is never an implied threat. Still, I feel puzzled at times as to whether there should be a wall present between us and the lion. The other people do not comment on its presence.

      Indoor outdoor ambiguity is likely the result of subliminal awareness of the differences between being conscious in waking life and being unconscious in the dream state, as a wall is otherwise liminal space division autosymbolism, the waking space between the incomplete fictional dream self identity and the conscious self identity.

      RAS modulation (dominating RAS mediation triggered by delayed consciousness reascension) remains inactive here, as there is no event regarding the lion, which otherwise remains a passive emergent consciousness factor. All this is saying is that RAS does not detect a possible threat in my immediate environment as I am sleeping. In childhood, concern over a wild animal getting into my Cubitis home was a recurring waking alert factor by way of RAS modulation, though such dreams were not nightmarish, as they only held sustained concern until my dream faded. It is a biological mechanism related to survival instinct, though additionally triggered by the lack of clarity of one’s environment in unconsciousness, especially upon an unfamiliar noise being subliminally perceived.


      Tags: lion
      Categories
      non-lucid
    6. Two Holes in Our Roof

      by , 02-19-2018 at 03:23 PM
      Morning of February 19, 2018. Monday.



      In the first part of my dream, I notice a square hole in the floor in front of our couch, near the middle, about a third of the size of the couch. I consider that our youngest daughter might fall through if she is not paying attention, although the concern does not dominate my thoughts, as I also consider she would likely be aware of it for the most part. It seems to be late afternoon. The couch is in the wrong orientation. It is perpendicular to its real location, as it is on the west side of the lounge room facing east (where it has never been in reality) instead of being at the south edge of the lounge room facing north.

      Later, Zsuzsanna and I are in a fictional room that is oriented where our oldest son’s room would be in reality, though is implied to be a mostly featureless lounge room, though there are bookshelves present. Zsuzsanna remains on my left. I focus on what looks like water dripping from a small area of the ceiling. I somehow see through the ceiling and see a large hole in the roof (as if I had x-ray vision, a fairly common dream state trait), oriented to my right. I tell Zsuzsanna of this, remembering that a new roof had just been built onto our house (in reality) and this new one has already partly “dissolved”. I also notice a smaller hole in the roof near the far corner of the room. I strongly focus on the idea of rain and water coming down, and (without viable lucidity) see water pouring through the small narrow irregular hole in the ceiling.

      After this, I expect more water to come in near where the cat is sleeping in the far corner. A smaller amount of water than in the first instance comes through the ceiling near the corner and splashes the cat, but it does not seem that annoyed and remains in its position. I have a vague concern about books getting wet, but no more water comes through and I slowly wake. (The supposed rainwater event is more like someone quickly pouring water from a bucket from the two areas above the ceiling rather than a leak caused by rain or an even amount of water over time as it does not even seem to be raining when I look through the ceiling with x-ray vision, and then through the hole in the roof each time, as the sky is blue and cloudless.)



      My dream self’s first focus is on the hole in the floor. This represents neural OR gating relating to a subliminal focus on Zsuzsanna’s unconsciousness, as it is in the same location in front of the couch where Zsuzsanna sits in reality. However, when Zsuzsanna later appears in my dream, she remains on my left when subliminal autosymbolism of our real sleeping position is present.

      Vestibular System Personification is incidentally rendered as our youngest daughter in this case. There is no modulating RAS factor or personification thereof and my dream self’s concern is illusory and ambiguous as in many past dreams of this nature.

      The holes in the roof represent neural OR gating of my conscious self identity (which has featured in many past dreams as such), to my dream self’s right as I am sleeping on my left side, my right side more exposed to my real environment. The larger hole, closest to my dream self, opens to my consciousness precursor, the other, Zsuzsanna’s. Neural OR gating means that my conscious self is manipulating my dream, with my personified subconscious (dream self) being only subliminally aware of the implications (that is, without full recall of the dream state, as the subconscious level lacks viable intelligence and temporality). To clarify, my conscious self is subliminally aware of being in the dream state, though my dream self is not (and does not even recall what a dream is), though my dream’s autosymbolism is still based on a value of “one” (OR gate). This is why there is a hole in the roof and why my dream self can see it through the ceiling (liminal space divider, that is, a neural pattern between dream self and conscious self).

      The cat is a precursory emergent consciousness factor (as a common liminal space denizen). My dream self is aware of its autosymbolism, which links a thread to my conscious self identity of which tries to reinduce and sustain the dream state by willing it to rain. (Even though in real life, rain coming into our home after the roof was torn off was obviously a negative event.)


    7. Explanatory Reference 002 (Personifications and MISC)

      by , 02-18-2018 at 01:34 PM
      Morning of February 18, 2018. Sunday.



      Explain Subconscious Self

      Explain Personified Subconscious

      The dream self is the subconscious, though I mostly only use the term “personified subconscious” (though I confess that I do not like the word “subconscious” in general as virtually everyone in the world uses it incorrectly at one point or another). It certainly is not the conscious self identity and it cannot be the unconscious essence, as the unconscious has viable memory of which the dream state rarely reflects (at least in non-lucidity, but often in some forms of lucidity as well). As the subconscious band is just a dynamic filter, with no temporal cohesion or thinking skills, it is senseless to attribute intelligence to it as many people do (though most people actually mean ECF and unconscious mediation when using such examples).

      Explain Vestibular System Personification

      Explain VSP

      Vestibular System Personification is a result of biological RAS modulation. This occurs due to vestibular system ambiguity, which is the perceptual conflict caused by perceiving the imaginary dream body as in a different position or orientation as the real physical body. This is what causes falling dreams, but on a positive note, flying dreams.

      I do not usually include the dream self as personification of any unconscious factor other than the subconscious itself. Examples of VSP might be, seeing someone falling, seeing someone flying, watching someone in an elevator or climbing stairs, an airplane pilot, someone flying a kite, and so on. Other RAS dynamics might be involved depending on the dream and what stage of the dream and level of unconsciousness are relevant.

      Explain Personified Unconscious

      Explain Unconscious Personification

      Unconscious Personification is likely only to occur in induction and sustained stages of a dream, where it is eventually modulated by RAS or ECF out of biological necessity, including a need to use the toilet or to more viably discern the source of an environmental noise (especially an unexpected sound in the immediate environment).

      Explain RAS

      RAS stands for Reticular Activating System. It is not feasible to write it out each time, so I usually only use RAS. It is a part of the brain (reticular formation) that mediates between the ephemeral fictional dream self incarnation and its illusory perception and the conscious self identity.

      Explain RAS Mediation

      RAS is partially the foundation of consciousness reascension autoymbolism, which is what the majority of non-lucid dreams are in the final stages. However, without ECF, there would likely be what is known as a coma.

      Explain RAS Modulation

      RAS Modulation occurs when the dream self is too “stubborn” or “absent” (likely by threads of the conscious self identity that choose to remain dormant longer) to move into consciousness reascension on its own.

      Explain Preconscious Personification

      Explain Personified Preconscious

      The Personified Preconscious is typically the final and most dominant character in a dream other than the dream self, though may be paired with the emergent consciousness. It may chase the dreamer. It may intrude into the dreamer’s home. It may, in contrast, hug the dreamer into the coalescence stage (consciousness reascension). Conflict with the preconscious or RAS modulation is often unrelated to current waking life conflict other than incidentally. It is important to understand however, that conflict in a dream can be prescient either by transpersonal factors (natural or subliminal instinct) or self-fulfilling prophecy.

      Explain Emergent Consciousness

      Explain Emergent Consciousness Factor

      Explain Emergent Consciousness Personification

      Explain ECF

      Explain ECP

      Without the Emergent Consciousness Factor, RAS would not have enough to work with. Emergent Consciousness Factors can occur in dreams in many forms, including books (as only the conscious self can viably read, as writing or print often becomes nonsensical or changes upon a second glance in dreams), computers, flashlights, towers, candles, burning towers or belfries (ECF parallel autosymbolism), lightning (more specifically as neural energy though sometimes an indication of physical pain or numbness depending on the dream or dreamer) and so on.

      The hierarchy of the dream state, in my fifty years of experience are, unconscious, personified subconscious (dream self), preconscious, RAS, emergent consciousness, conscious self identity.



      This dream journal entry is specifically for search engines and website search functions.


      Categories
      side notes
    8. George and Sonny Visit (Prescient)

      by , 02-17-2018 at 08:17 AM
      Morning of February 17, 2018. Saturday.



      Dream Series: The Experience of Prescience, the Inexplicable Dream State Phenomenon. Part 2



      In the first part of my dream, my wife Zsuzsanna and our family are living back on Barolin Street in Australia (though the house has not been there for years). My dream self does not perceive this as incorrect (as usual). We are all in the living room at first. Zsuzsanna’s brothers George and Sonny are visiting, though appear as they were in about 2000. Even though they are talking a lot, I do not clearly follow what they are saying. They seem cheerful for the most part. Eventually, I hear them mention their annoyance about a particular dog, though it seems that two dogs from their neighbor’s yard got into his backyard, which George seems to imply has killed or at least attacked one of his horses. They make a remark about doing something about it, and talk about getting a rifle, but they do not seem very serious, as they seem too cheerful to appear as seeking vengeance.

      Somehow, a sheriff (dressed in a khaki uniform) enters our house, though from a fictional entrance at the southeast corner of the room. He starts talking about how certain kinds of dogs, as well as certain types of weapons, are not allowed in the region. He does not seem angry or intent on making an arrest at any point.

      I focus on the sheriff even though he does not seem to regard me at any time. I seem to be sitting down, though my physical awareness at this time is minimal. His appearance becomes more and more bizarre. As I look at his face, it seems wider and wider at the bottom, and narrower and narrower at the top. It seems very strange to me on one level, but on another level, I do not grasp the full surreal nature. I even have a thought like, “so that is what people’s faces look like from this angle”.

      Eventually, George and Sonny are leaving. I go with Zsuzsanna and them to the front entrance, except that as they leave, I am now going into the backyard of the Loomis Street house in America (where I have not been since 1994) and they are walking out to the alley. My dream self does not question this impossible change. It is dark outside, though I can still see a lot of detail. Still, at first, I think there is snow on the ground or possibly light-colored hair, but this seems like an ambiguous view. I walk around the south side of the house and notice the dirt is strangely soft so that my feet sink down a few inches (though there is no problematic element). There is no grass. As I look down at the ground, there is a very unusual atypical mood, but I cannot quite describe it.



      Friday, 30 March 2018: What I presently understand about this dream, based on the following real-life event: From exactly one week after this dream, in real life, two large dogs somehow got into our backyard and damaged a couple bird cages (the birds remaining unharmed as I caught them in time) as well as tore apart the Guinea pig cage (on our back porch) just before that, chewed up our children’s pet, but left it lying in the yard near our fence. They also deliberately picked up a few glass bowls (which we use for food and water for our pets) with their mouths and smashed them back onto the concrete as well as pulling out a few lengths of old electrical wiring (no longer in use) from under the back of the house. I felt the same unexplainable anticipation and eerie mood upon realizing our children’s pet was lying in pieces on the ground as I did in my dream concerning the vague uncertainty over the nature of the ground, but it is very hard to describe in words (though my dream’s prescience was quite skewed in regard to the specific details). Also, there was light-colored hair strewn over the lawn from the remains of the guinea pig.

      Despite part 1 of this series, “The End of the World and Discovering the Sleeper” also turning out to be quite accurately prescient exactly one week ahead, and also of which I completely ignored as a warning as such, that is not always the case. Sometimes the event or feature is shortly after my dream, sometimes one year to the date, other times (such as my marriage to Zsuzsanna) over forty years to the date. It remains inexplicable, especially as there was no reason to consciously expect or even anticipate these events. The owner had come over (against my wishes), who apparently lives down the street somewhere. He offered to give my children a puppy or two (of one of the dogs that killed their pet), which frankly, is about as “absent” of mind and unthinking that anyone could get. About two weeks later, he brought over two guinea pigs, lying to Zsuzsanna that I had told him to do this, when I had made it clear I did not want to see him around our house again.



      On a side note, I had written before of how “reality checks” for some lucid dreamers (who, for whatever reason, are not naturally lucid as I have always been), who have to “practice” at it, ultimately destroy the integrity of RAS mediation, RAS modulation, and viable consciousness itself. (The concept of “reality checks” has always seemed bizarre to me and has never added up, at least based on my own experiences since childhood. Is this really how some people’s minds work?) People as a rule never listen, though. This includes me when it comes to prescience of which is more significant. Regarding part 1 of this series, I should really have made the important connection between the oversized pizza box and coffin composite and our oldest son getting life-threatening food poisoning from pizza from the closest pizza takeaway. Regarding this entry, I should have checked the literal possibility of dogs getting into our yard and adding to (and better securing) the fence at the side of our house, despite the mother dog having difficulty in getting over it when leaving our backyard after the damage was done.


      Updated 03-30-2018 at 01:18 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    9. Adventures through the RAS Gate

      by , 02-16-2018 at 01:27 PM
      Afternoon of February 16, 2018. Friday.



      This is a compilation entry, though simplified, based on many key dreams which designate a door or doorway as neural gating of a specific type, typically under the subconscious self’s choice in both non-lucid events to apex lucidity (though in apex lucidity, the true conscious self identity is far more extant and viable). A door as rendered in either a non-lucid dream or lucid dream has always solely served as either the exit point of the dream state or, in some cases, to augment and stabilize the precursor to apex lucidity. Note that the summary for each dream does not reflect the entire dream.

      Dogpile, from February 19, 1972. I had entered apex lucidity (in my final dream of this date) with my dream rendering the correct time; early morning after sunrise. I see the bony remains of a dead dog halfway between the railroad tracks and the edge of our backyard. I notice that a smaller dog seems to be guarding the remains. The dog (of which is facing me, though at a distance) soon notices me and begins to growl menacingly. The ghost of the other dog rises up from the bones and seems to pose a threat as well. They both run toward me. My position had been the easternmost end of the Cubitis carport. I deliberately run and jump through the doorway of the Cubitis house to wake myself.

      Both RAS and the emergent consciousness factor “chase” me into consciousness. As my lucid dream self, I recognize this common autosymbolic event and its meaning while still in the dream state but I do not attempt to contest it. Instead, I choose to find a doorway to jump through to purposely leave the dream state. I manage to jump and fall halfway through the doorway, anticipating the sensation of the dogs biting my heels (anticipating the common hypnopompic kick as a result), though there is no sense of pain in liminal space. RAS was often rendered as an aggressive dog of which challenged my will to control the dream state as a child. This is based on two factors, my dream potentially “obeying” my lucid dream self’s will and a dog being the closest analogy to that, and the RAS factor being influenced by having seen “The Hound of the Baskervilles” (1959 version) a few times, which designated a dog as being an attack factor. (I had no fear or concern of dogs in waking life, as much of what occurs in a dream is based on the dream state itself in its autosymbolic transitions, not waking life unless prescient or “received” from loved ones.)

      The emergent consciousness factor as the ghost dog, as divided from RAS, is based on known dynamics. The remains were where we had bonfires in real life, thus designate the recurring Phoenix Factor as symbolizing re-emergence into full consciousness via biological RAS gating. Additionally, it appeared as a ghost due to the dream self identity not being the complete conscious self identity.

      Catlike Shadow Creature and Shopping, from September 10, 2016. A non-lucid but vivid sequence features a cat shadow as my emergent consciousness precursor (not a waking factor of which the common checkout autosymbolism was eventually rendered as the waking transition in this dream). Upon approaching it, it leaps impossibly into the top of the closed door and somehow slides through the narrow gap between door and door frame. The Shadow is my conscious self identity. As the conscious self identity cannot exist within unconsciousness, it has often been rendered as either a cat or shadow (or in this case, both) in my dreams since early childhood. As such, it is a liminal space denizen for several reasons. One, it is associated with “always landing on its feet” relating to the falling sensation that occurs as a result of vestibular system ambiguity, a biological factor of the waking transition. Two, its being associated with sitting on a fence, a fence as autosymbolism for liminal space division (between dream self and conscious self). Thirdly, a cat by popular myth “having nine lives”, is like the Phoenix Factor of returning to whole consciousness. There is an additional very curious factor which had been influenced by the ending scene of “The Flintstones”, which I am even aware of in this particular dream in the specific movement of the cat creature. This is where Fred picks up the sabretooth cat, puts it outside, and the cat goes back in through the window and then puts Fred out. There have been a number of endings of various television shows that were borrowed for RAS mediation (typically only as dream state end markers and waking precursors or at least transitions of levels of unconsciousness).

      The Old Shack, from August 24, 1970. As with Dogpile, I use a virtual doorway to deliberately “escape” the dream state. In this case, threatening flight as a vestibular system ambiguity dynamic, a pterodactyl, chases me across a field. As I dive through the “doorway”, in this case the ruins of an outdoor rose trellis linked to an old fence on each side, I see the pterodactyl that I was concerned about turn back into a sparrow, as it falls upside-down from the sky. In this case, I perceived my emergent consciousness (the shadow on the ground, of which the pterodactyl cast) as somewhat ominous, a viewpoint that rarely occurs as an adult due to having learned so much about the dream state.

      Ocean Beyond the Doorway (with Kenneth Hill), from February 9, 1975. In this dream, I want to find my “dream girl” (the precognitive form of Zsuzsanna long before we met in reality). My dream ends with me standing on Kenneth’s left. (RAS usually modulates from the right side of my dream self in dream self to conscious self mediation due to me sleeping on my left side with my right side more exposed to my real environment). I sadly tell Kenneth that “It didn’t work” when opening a fictional door in the Cubitis hallway (west side) and seeing the ocean in afternoon light. Although the ocean also represents the transpersonal nature of unconsciousness, in this case, it was also a rendering of the fact that Zsuzsanna lived across the ocean from me in real life at the time. There were a number of other dreams where I was “blocked” by the ocean. The ocean usually only occurs in my last dream of a sleeping period (due to it also representing circadian rhythms dynamics and the nature of sleep in relationship to consciousness as an analogy to the tidal factors of the world), whereas lakes and rivers occur in all stages of sleep until water lowering waking symbolism becomes a key factor.

      Batwing Doors, from October 22, 2017. In this dream’s final scene, Zsuzsanna is eventually standing directly behind fancy batwing doors. The doorway waking symbolism included the RAS hybrid factor of vestibular system associations (“return flight”, a factor of over one in five of my dreams).

      A door as the potential exit point of a dream (in fact, the main symbol for this precursory event) differs only slightly from the fence feature. That can be seen in the following dream:

      Through the Fence, from April 17, 2014. In this dream, I move between a narrow gap in the high wooden fence (in our present backyard or what resembles it) as if it was a door. A group of Aboriginal Australian girls move from near the front of their house, coming to talk to me (perhaps because I am seen by them as trespassing). The final scene involves an older Aboriginal female of about seventy, with white hair, asking me if I have seen her husband. In this case, the RAS gating is rather curious. I suspect that I was “seeing” a much older version of Zsuzsanna, though rendered as an unknown RAS character, especially as she asks where her husband is, though it may also be seen as random transpersonal communication with someone else’s unconsciousness.

      Three Keys and the “Unfair Advantage”, from March 22, 2014. In this dream, I effortlessly transformed into a snake and back again, in other words, taking on the essence of RAS itself (very rare other than in apex lucidity at times). I eventually deliberately vivify my dream by opening a door; a large and difficult old wooden blue door, to such an extent that the vividness of the scene I stepped into seemed realistic beyond belief, even for me. It almost seemed as if I entered Alexander Siddig’s unconsciousness (though of course, unlike with Zsuzsanna, there is no way to validate this event). There have been other dreams with this implication.

      In a dream I had shortly after my brother-in-law Bob’s mother died, I found myself approaching a door. I willed it open and was looking into an unfamiliar room. After time passed, I became aware that I might be intruding upon someone else’s privacy. Bob’s mother is sitting in an armchair, talking with her husband, who had also died. She approached the door while looking annoyed and slammed it in my face. (I had rarely ever even seen her in real life and this was my only dream of her.)

      There are thousands of other dreams in which RAS mediation as a doorway scenario was a key factor of the waking precursor. Sometimes there is audio, including the knocking on a door or a door closing, depending upon which level of unconsciousness I am entering or leaving.


      Categories
      side notes
    10. The Gift of Rain and the Inexplicable Nature of RAS

      by , 02-16-2018 at 08:16 AM
      Morning of February 16, 2018. Friday.



      In my dream, the most vivid scenario of the waking transition involves my dream self (personified subconscious) being on a bus with my wife Zsuzsanna and our youngest children. I remain in a passive and thankful mood. The location is unknown. It does not seem familiar, though the bus driver is on the left side, so it seems to be implied to be in America (though I have not lived there since 1994 and Zsuzsanna has never been there).

      The bus driver is an unknown chubby female of whom reminds me of my crossing guard from when I lived at 901 Rose Street (near the intersection in a second floor apartment of a building which is no longer there).

      It seems to be late morning, though the perceived time seems to change a few times (of which is very common in my dreams, as my subconscious self has no viable sense of time or continuity). There is an intersection up ahead. I am aware that it had been raining. An interesting mood develops. I realize that rain makes human life possible and that without it, the world would have no life. I have a vague awareness that the bus driver had telepathically caused me to realize this.

      There had been a flood in one part of the street (from the rain), but the water has lowered. As we near the intersection, I have the typical focus on whether or not the bus driver is competent (this being a long-term carryover from waking life thought since childhood, though this thought does not dominate or seem problematic and I ultimately trust the driver to get us home safely).

      The bus stops, but we are apparently not at our destination yet (though my dream self has no focus on where I presently live as is often the case). The bus is on the right side of the street, its back close to the perpendicular street it just turned from. The bus driver says, “I have to find something”. I am standing in the front stairwell of the bus watching her. She puts her hands down into the murky water near the curb. Soon, she pulls out a small tennis racket that is slightly muddy (though with very light-colored tan sand). I am uncertain if this is what she had been looking for, but she gives it to my youngest son. My dream fades from here.



      Zsuzsanna, in real life, had been looking at, and thinking about, small tennis rackets made for dolls while at a Kmart store on the previous day (Our Generation dolls and accessories). There is no explicable way I could have known this or for it to influence the main event in my final dream of the sleeping period. Not only this, she said her thought processes were “stronger” than usual during this event. Additionally, after my dream, she told me of how she had won a tennis racket at age twelve by reaching into water and pulling out a toy duck (relating to a matching number for the prize at a Brisbane show). This is not unusual in my experience, as at least one dream per sleeping period is based on something Zsuzsanna had thought about (or said to someone else) of which I could not have possibly known about. This was validated to have been going on, continuously, long before we met, and additionally, Zsuzsanna is the “mystery girl” who had been in my dreams since childhood (and of whom I even saw in my dreams as an adult while she was still very young).



      The scenario of this dream, a bus approaching an intersection and stopping or bumping into a curb before turning right (sometimes in the event of water lowering waking symbolism as here), has recurred since early childhood, though always with different dynamics. This is based on neural gating. It signifies whether or not the dream state will terminate or continue. (However, there are also inexplicable dynamics of which I will describe below.) As here, the bus turns right and my dream soon ends after the RAS to emergent consciousness factor, additionally validated by the water lowering waking symbolism, which occurs in at least one dream during every sleeping period (water symbolizing sleep in autosymbolism, its dynamics relevant to the specific aspect of REM).

      RAS as the personified preconscious is a bus driver here. The biological function of RAS (Reticular Activating System) is for sleep-wake transitions (though again, there are inexplicable dynamics). This is why a dream is primarily autosymbolic of the dream state and waking transition itself, which is why “interpretation” as most commonly propagated is not a real concept despite the Barnum effect.

      There is evidence that the side the bus driver is on in a dream correlates with what side I am sleeping on, especially as buses and cars often symbolize (or are an autosymbolic extension of) the human body. (This is also true for boats, airplanes, and trains when vestibular system ambiguity is more extant in REM. In fact, there has even been a dream where a bus I was on rolled over after I rolled over to sleep on my opposite side. However, the content of a dream must be looked at closely, as autosymbolism is based on the specific level of unconsciousness and varies from state to state through the waking transition.)



      I know that RAS mediation and modulation as a dream’s final event, when it utilizes personification as the preconscious as here, is often transpersonal (inherently unrelated to both the dream self and the conscious self by its very nature and purpose, as its purpose is to ignite enough emotion to trigger waking, including by way of dominance or perceived conflict, real or not, though some of this “conflict” is caused by muscle tension in unconsciousness as well as vestibular system ambiguity or subliminal concern over unknown environmental noise). This tells me that RAS is not simply the biological factor of the neural gating of the dream state in REM, but transpersonal neural gating that also occurs when I am conscious. However, the dynamics are puzzling. Sometimes these events have happened in real time (during my nap while Zsuzsanna was elsewhere and “sending” in real time) and sometimes based on recent thoughts that Zsuzsanna had held in her mind but which later integrates into my dream.


      Updated 09-21-2019 at 03:15 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    11. The Hot Sun

      by , 02-15-2018 at 08:15 AM
      Morning of February 15, 2018. Thursday.



      My dream starts in a house that I had never lived in. It seems to be what would have been the second house west of the King Street mansion, where I have not lived in over twenty years. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me. We had apparently been sleeping on the porch. However, two people are talking very loudly kitty-corner (diagonally) from the intersection on our street, and they are on West 10th Street. They are on their porch. It is three o'clock in the morning.

      I am annoyed, as I want to sleep longer (though I do not feel tired in my dream so its link to a biological need for more sleep is not a key factor here, especially as first-level dream state indicators or DSI1s, such as beds or other subliminal signs of being in the dream state occur in over twenty percent of my dreams as does vestibular system autosymbolism). Eventually, a police officer shows up in a police car on the other side of the street. He notices me at the porch windows and I point with my right finger in the direction of the annoying people (to my right, which means I have subliminal awareness that I am in the dream state, as I sleep on my left side, which is resultantly more closed off from the environment I sleep in). He goes over to tell them not to be doing this. (I assume that someone else had called the police.)

      A short time later, Zsuzsanna and I are in the Cubitis house without my dream self even noticing. It is still around three o’clock in the morning, yet I notice the sky has the appearance of approaching dawn. (I see this through the back and front windows, in that order. I am never outside at any point in this dream.) This concerns me. I know it probably means humanity does not have much longer. Still, Zsuzsanna has a cheerful attitude and it seems that it may actually be a lesser threat than I had thought, as it might be normal for this time of year. I am overheated when I wake but not with as ill of a feeling as I sometimes get when it is too warm.



      Two environmental factors had influence on this dream; the heat, and someone talking outside our window as I was sleeping. Still, the sun symbolizes emergent consciousness and dawn would be analogous to leaving the dream state. RAS does not take the form of a police officer very often, but it is a good indicator, as RAS could be seen as a biological “police officer”, with the purpose of preventing sleep from lasting too long, especially under perceived real environmental aspects as a survival mechanism.

      Because of this dream, I can more specifically validate the intersection symbolism as relevant to most dreams that feature this as a main focus. It is simply autosymbolism for the neural gating of RAS mediation, the subliminal choice to remain asleep or to wake. The evidence is obvious. The police officer as RAS, though not here inherent to the WAF in this case as he is on the opposite side of the street rather than being close to my dream self, is going to the house kitty corner from where Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the porch (which is autosymbolism for a specific level of unconsciousness closer to the end of the sleep cycle). I point out (to RAS) the house diagonally from where I am (and this is actually a form of faux lucidity with actual liminal dream control being a lesser factor, faux lucidity being dream self behavior based on the virtuous circle of dream state knowledge without being lucid and liminal dream control more about creating and controlling the dream at its core without recall of what a dream is as in apex lucidity). Instead of dominating my dreams as RAS usually does in the final stage of the sleep-wake transition, he goes over to tell them to stop so that Zsuzsanna and I can sleep (dream) longer. However, even though RAS autosymbolism did not trigger the WAF (waking alert factor), I see evidence of the approaching day, "sooner and brighter than I want”, as the emergent consciousness factor, and in this heat, it is seen as a somewhat negative environmental aspect.


      Updated 05-06-2018 at 10:16 AM by 1390

      Categories
      Uncategorized
    12. Skywatching, with Atypical Distortions

      by , 02-15-2018 at 08:15 AM
      Morning of February 15, 2017. Wednesday.



      I am with Zsuzsanna in Cubitis. We are mostly watching the nighttime sky and standing near Highway Seventeen at first. The stars are beautiful. There are no other people around.

      At one point, there is a large sparse group of what I first take to be stars. It turns out that they are UFOs that move northeasterly across the sky (above the western horizon), almost like equidistant dust motes. As I watch, there is one larger object amidst the others that moves to the front of the group. It is white and glowing. It goes through two transformations; an overhead view of the Starship Enterprise (original design) and a white silhouette of a man (as big as the previous Enterprise image) with his arms out (perpendicular to his body). This feature moves erratically ahead of the group as if moving through an invisible maze, with a comedic sense. There is a typical factor of liminal dream control here, as I am very vaguely aware my expectations are influencing the UFOs somehow, but it is not enough to cause me to question my level of consciousness, even though it relates to my most common form of autosymbolism - vestibular system correlation that is additionally validated by the “body as vehicle” dream state association where the spaceship becomes the figure of a man. (Also, it is curious that I witness both the Enterprise and flying man from the top, which, from my viewpoint, would imply “they” are flying sideways, though this is a result of sleeping on my left side in the same orientation as the flying “man”.)

      My dream shifts and I am in my Cubitis bedroom. I still seem to be watching the entire sky, though there is a strange bilocated distortion (as if my view is from indoors and outdoors at the same time - a very common dream state ambiguity caused by the liminal awareness of my physical body being in bed). The stars appear somewhat dim even though there are dense clusters. Ambiguity, caused by a shift in the level of unconsciousness, seems to be that I am looking at cheap wallpaper with a sketchy outer space design on it (which is also a result of liminal space autosymbolism, a wall being the implied barrier between dream self identity and conscious self identity, thus this dream is a unique form of combined autosymbolism of liminal space awareness with vestibular system correlation). The wallpaper at least covers the west area of the room (where there were otherwise large windows) and at least part of the south area.


      Tags: sky, star trek, stars
      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. The Hot Sun

      by , 02-15-2018 at 08:15 AM
      Morning of February 15, 2018. Thursday.



      My dream starts in a house that I had never lived in. It seems to be what would have been the second house west of the King Street mansion, where I have not lived in over twenty years. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me. We had apparently been sleeping on the porch. However, two people are talking very loudly kitty-corner (diagonally) from the intersection on our street, and they are on West 10th Street. They are on their porch. It is three o'clock in the morning.

      I am annoyed, as I want to sleep longer (though I do not feel tired in my dream so its link to a biological need for more sleep is not a key factor here, especially as first-level dream state indicators or DSI1s, such as beds or other subliminal signs of being in the dream state occur in over twenty percent of my dreams as does vestibular system autosymbolism). Eventually, a police officer shows up in a police car on the other side of the street. He notices me at the porch windows and I point with my right finger in the direction of the annoying people (to my right, which means I have subliminal awareness that I am in the dream state, as I sleep on my left side, which is resultantly more closed off from the environment I sleep in). He goes over to tell them not to be doing this. (I assume that someone else had called the police.)

      A short time later, Zsuzsanna and I are in the Cubitis house without my dream self even noticing. It is still around three o’clock in the morning, yet I notice the sky has the appearance of approaching dawn. (I see this through the back and front windows, in that order. I am never outside at any point in this dream.) This concerns me. I know it probably means humanity does not have much longer. Still, Zsuzsanna has a cheerful attitude and it seems that it may actually be a lesser threat than I had thought, as it might be normal for this time of year. I am overheated when I wake but not with as ill of a feeling as I sometimes get when it is too warm.

      Two environmental factors had influence on this dream; the heat, and someone talking outside our window as I was sleeping. Still, the sun is autosymbolic of emergent consciousness and dawn would be analogous to leaving the dream state. RAS does not take the form of a police officer very often, but it is a good indicator, as RAS could be seen as a biological “police officer”, with the purpose of preventing sleep from lasting too long, especially under perceived real environmental aspects as a survival mechanism.



      Because of this dream, I can more specifically validate the intersection symbolism as relevant to most dreams that feature this as a main focus. It is simply autosymbolism for the neural gating of RAS mediation, the subliminal choice to remain asleep or to wake. The evidence is obvious. The police officer as RAS, though not here inherent to the WAF in this case as he is on the opposite side of the street rather than being close to my dream self, is going to the house kitty corner from where Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the porch (which is autosymbolism for a specific level of unconsciousness closer to the end of the sleep cycle). I point out (to RAS) the house diagonally from where I am (and this is actually a form of faux lucidity with actual liminal dream control being a lesser factor, faux lucidity being dream self behavior based on the virtuous circle of dream state knowledge without being lucid and liminal dream control more about creating and controlling the dream at its core without recall of what a dream is as in apex lucidity). Instead of dominating my dreams as RAS usually does in the final stage of the sleep-wake transition, he goes over to tell them to stop so that Zsuzsanna and I can sleep (dream) longer. However, even though RAS autosymbolism did not trigger the WAF (waking alert factor), I see evidence of the approaching day, "sooner and brighter than I want”, as the emergent consciousness factor, and in this heat, it is seen as a somewhat negative environmental aspect.


      Categories
      Uncategorized
    14. Surreal Non-Lucid RAS (as Snake) Manipulation

      by , 02-14-2018 at 08:14 AM
      Morning of February 14, 2018. Wednesday.



      By way of liminal dream control (manipulation of the dream state without lucidity as a result of virtuous circle liminal understanding of what the dream state is), features and events in a dream can get really surreal and abstract, yet still with deep involvement of the dream self and inherent autosymbolism representing the dream state and waking process itself.

      My dream’s setting is mainly in the dining room of the Loomis Street house. My dream self does not regard it as a typical wrong setting. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me (mostly remaining on my left as in our sleeping orientation). I have the task of digging up roots from parts of sections of grass to make a new garden within the floor so that only dirt remains. In this case, after spending several minutes pulling roots from the dirt of the dining room “floor”, I notice the end of a section of a miniature culvert within a hole in the ground of about four inches deep.

      Snakes will come as a RAS trigger during any time period, regardless of life circumstances or the experiences of the dreamer. It is a biological process in all primates. The purpose is often simply to alert the sleeper to prepare for waking, regardless of any real threat (and often light environmental noise, or even a vague awareness of the real environment, is enough to trigger RAS mediation of this kind).

      As such, when I focus on the miniature culvert, I am thinking an animal may live within, that is, that it leads to the animal’s home. I do not even consider how ridiculous the idea is for an animal to build a tiny “culvert” with human design aspects. There is something in the back of my mind, the very familiar anticipatory feeling caused by subliminal expectation of RAS mediation, a main factor of my dreams since early childhood.

      I briefly mention it to Zsuzsanna. My dream temporarily distorts into my older sister Marilyn making a very brief appearance (though mostly as she was in the 1960s) and my illogical thoughts relating to whether or not she had died (though she had in real life in 2014). My brother-in-law Bob is moving stuff around that belonged to her, relating to her death, even though she had been in the house minutes before. The ambiguity of me living with Zsuzsanna on Loomis Street when Marilyn and her husband were not even living there when she died does not come into focus. This error of Marilyn and her husband occurs very often, likely because it was their last address of which I saw in real life before my move to Australia.

      Eventually, my expectations are answered, and a very small grayish snake (though of various shades, including a sort of brown tone) crawls from the miniature culvert. It is only about the size of an earthworm. It eventually crawls to the kitchen. My dreaming mind is expecting this RAS mediation, but it is so weak an attempt, the snake stops moving. I am not sure if I mentally killed it or not.

      Looking into the living room from the open dining room area, I see several separate longer blades of grass on the floor, about a dozen in total. There seems to be an unrealistically large table taking up much of the living room space as I am looking under it from the opposite end of the dining room. I am wondering if one of these grass pieces is actually the snake (which makes no sense as it had just been in the kitchen). The whole time, there is not much of a perceived threat and it is almost as if my dream self is trying to activate RAS again by anticipating a small snake manifesting from a grass blade. No snake appears and I eventually awake, feeling too warm (even with our fan on).


      Tags: dirt floor, snake
      Categories
      non-lucid
    15. Surreal Non-Lucid RAS (as Snake) Manipulation

      by , 02-14-2018 at 08:14 AM
      Morning of February 14, 2018. Wednesday.

      Dream #: 18,685-02. Reading time (optimized): 1 min 30 sec.



      My dream’s irrelevant setting is the dining room of the Loomis Street house. Zsuzsanna is with me (mostly remaining on my left as in our sleeping orientation). I am digging up roots from parts of sections of grass for a new garden within the “ground” (floor), so only dirt remains.

      After spending several minutes pulling roots from the dirt of the dining room “floor,” I notice the end of a section of a little culvert within a hole in the ground of about four inches deep.

      When I focus on the little culvert, I think an animal may live in it or that it leads to the animal’s home underground. (I do not consider how ridiculous the idea is for an animal to build a tiny culvert as if by human design). There is a familiar anticipatory feeling caused by the subliminal expectation of waking process dynamics.

      I briefly mention it to Zsuzsanna. My older sister Marilyn makes a brief appearance (mostly as she was in the 1960s) and I have illogical thoughts about whether she had died. Because of her death, Bob is moving her belongings even though she had been in the house minutes before.

      An answer to my expectation begins. A tiny grayish snake (though of various shades, including a brown tone) crawls from the little culvert. It is only about the size of an earthworm. It eventually crawls to the kitchen. My dreaming mind is expecting this, but it is so vague, the snake stops moving. I consider I may have killed it with my thoughts.

      Looking into the living room from the dining room, I see about a dozen long blades of grass on the floor. There seems to be an unrealistically large table taking up much of the living room as I am looking under it from the opposite end of the dining room. I wonder if one of these grass pieces is the snake (which makes no sense as it had just been in the kitchen). There is never a perceived threat. It is as if my dream self is trying to activate RAS again by anticipating a small snake manifesting from a grass blade. No snake appears, and I awake, too warm (even with our fan on).


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