Blue_Opossum

Afternoon of December 4, 2013. Wednesday.



Although I have already done fairly short summaries regarding some of the dream content found here, I am putting it together under a new concept - “how to be an idiot in lucid dreams”, which seems to fit well with some of the material.

Perhaps the most ridiculous example of sheer futility was when I set up a Casio digital sampling keyboard - with the electrical cord holding the key down (by being pulled under the adjoining keys) and listening through my sleeping period in 1989 to an affirmation regarding “I am aware now, within my dream”. The samples could not be very long, and the same one (sole sample) was assigned across the keyboard of various “artificial pitches” with no formant option (the pitch solely being altered by the length of the sample/sound-wave, a much simpler but entirely useless way to get different pitches - people with authentic perception can easily tell that they are slowed down or sped-up sounds, primarily because the formant is as well - unlike the advanced grain stretching and frequency band with formant manipulation which I find very easy to do these days - I am still agonizing when I hear older recordings that used this older method as well as the ever-irritating and horribly “anyone-can-do-it mentality” stutter and “play any song with any sound” nonsense).

As stated before in an older summary, this did indeed “open” a lucid dream. Throughout my life, it has been a “habit” to have at least one lucid dream every day ever since I can remember (even as a baby) - which is usually the first one upon entering sleep via a hypnagogic portal. However, I have experimented with everything and anything. In this case, I had a dream where…as said before…I spent the entire lucid dream trying to find the source of the sound to stop it! How idiotic is that? Indeed, that is like listening to a hypnotist and then telling him to shut up half-way through because you are trying to be hypnotized.

In this particular dream I was trying to open doors in a long hallway, trying to determine where the sound was coming from, some of the doors being locked. I did not even make the obvious connection that the sound source was outside of my dream environment and in the real world at the time. When I woke, I felt ridiculous in being “tricked” that way.

In the “Knife Nose” dream from early 1970 (which I did not give full references to before, even in title), I was entering my lucid dream awareness. I was in the backyard in Cubitis and it seemed to be late morning. I was facing the south and sitting in an unfinished area of the larger rabbit shed near the concrete block columns. From the carport, a dog was approaching as soon as I started to get an idea on how to dream what I wanted. I got very annoyed, as dogs appearing in my dreams was always bad news in that they would soon attack or try to chase me (which is rather odd, as I do not recall any traumatic events with dogs prior to that stage of my life). I shouted out “You dogs are always ruining my dreams!” From there, the “back spasm” unfolded as the dog immediately growled and ran to me and pressed his nose into the small of my back, causing great pain and an “electrical sensation”. I have had this all my life (actually fairly common now, but not associated with dreaming - it usually occurs before hypnagogic visions kick in more fully). It seems to be some sort of strange threshold between conscious thought and expectation that triggers some sort of muscle spasm in the lower back (but now sometimes also occurs in other areas near the ribs). It is also some sort of strange combination of extreme pleasure and extreme pain. I used to think it was associated with so-called Kundilini energy.

A very similar dream resulted from yelling at a buzzard being in my lucid dream (and being tired of non-lucid dreams where buzzards sometimes posed a threat). A similar response resulted, the buzzard flew down into the carport (as I ran into it) and just as I was sitting down (as in, not making it to the front door of the actual house in time I decided to try to sit down to protect my back), it landed on my back and stabbed me with its beak, causing the exact same “back spasm” event. This seems to be some sort of both causal and premonition-like event in medical science related to “seizure premonitions” related to epilepsy, although I do not have any diagnosed medical condition of this nature. It is very perplexing, though. Which comes first? If I had not responded that way to the “characters” in my dream, would the “back spasm” still have occurred? Again, I am left with a bit of doubt over the threshold or line between premonition and manifestation. What instigates what?

A fairly common event throughout my life (perhaps because I do a lot more walking than many people) regarding the entering of hypnagogic portals each night is that, regarding certain environments that form, I am sometimes rudely kicked out of it. A fairly common event is entering the portal and walking along the streets of a city and developing full lucidity. Sometimes I have a companion, sometimes I am on my own. As I walk I become more and more integrated into my dream. However, there is sometimes the sudden tripping and falling into “nothing” and waking suddenly. There seem to be variations on this. I am already fully in the lucid dream, yet this happens. (Supposedly it only happens to some people AS they are falling asleep, not after - some say the cause is exhaustion, but this is not the case with my experiences, one name for it seems to be “hypnic jerk” although there is something called myoclonus in more extreme cases(?) - it is hard to say with all the weirdness in completely different beliefs about such things, even medically - public credibility failure as usual.)

Finally, getting to the real idiocy. What could be more idiotic and futile (and yes, this has happened to me a few times) then manifesting a lucid dream, and then trying to shut it down over concern of what various characters might think? In a few cases, I have gone around the dream environment, deliberately, yes…deliberately - trying to remove portals and “seeds” (including tulpa templates at the lucid dream level). I mean really, does a movie producer experiencing his greatest potential then decide to say - whoops, I had better change it to conform to what other characters would expect…idiocy at its finest, I would say. I am still not sure why this happens - perhaps some sort of transient state or “phasing” with the minds of other people. I have had a few dreams like this over the years. Sometimes, in my dream, I try to find any book with a reference or particular phrasing to open a portal (sometimes even a supposed talisman) and deliberately destroy it or put it somewhere else (as it is often located with someone else’s belongings somehow). In a recent example, I went through the dream environment to make sure that there were no portals or potential for such, or any evidence on dream manipulation or tulpa manifestation…I did it a few times in the same environment. This is utter idiocy at its most ridiculous extreme. It is like building a great house and then closing off half the rooms because you do not want people to know your house is bigger. Whatever. I am sure will find a “cure” one day. It is like when I “pulsed” the word “girls” many years back - and other phrases for nearly an entire day, and what did I get in-dream? A night-long adventure featuring…squirrels.

Although it certainly is not always the case, I have also held that “I had better be wary of what my real (sleeping) body is doing in real life right now”. Where is the logic of this? I am fully aware I am dreaming and the dream is as vivid as real life - and by all logic, my real physical body would be motionless in bed. Yet I have this concern in the back of my mind that my real physical body could be wandering around in the middle of the street in reality (undressed, yet), perhaps being endangered or some such or perhaps the pillow covering my mouth or perhaps there are visitors in real life and they will see me undressed or whatever. It almost seems logical in a way. There are technically “two different mes” and it seems to be by instinct that concern should be sharply focused for “both”. I have also already stated how “the shadow” seems to be the conscious self in a lucid dream (and perhaps many other types of dreams). I have tested this, and it seems to be true. I have actually caused my physical body to move by getting my shadow to do something while I - as the dreamer - remained still (a different sort of “shadow play”). This is not the rule for lucid dreams in general; in lucid dreams that otherwise had a lot of physical activity AS the dreamer, I was told that I did not move at all during my sleep - during the time period involved (which was sometimes in the daytime or during naps).

The “great adventure” continues…